Aloha with Esther Zuckerman

[00:00:01] Blank Check with Griffin and David, Blank Check with Griffin and David

[00:00:08] What to say or to expect? All you need to know is that the name of the show is Blank Check

[00:00:20] My father was half Chinese and half Hawaiian, my mother's of Swedish descent so that makes me a quarter podcast!

[00:00:29] Great. Hi. Aloha everyone. How are you doing?

[00:00:32] Aloha!

[00:00:33] My name's Griffin Newman. I'm David Sims. This is Blank Check with Griffin and David, Colin, WePodcast.

[00:00:39] This is a podcast where we go through directors who have big success early on and are given a series of blank checks

[00:00:45] and sometimes they cash out and sometimes the checks bounce, baby!

[00:00:50] This episode is not about the movie bounce, it's about the film Aloha because...

[00:00:53] We should do a bounce podcast. Bounce cast? Bounce cast.

[00:00:57] This mini-series WePodcast is about the films of Cameron Crow and we are on...

[00:01:02] Not Don Rus. Don Rus. Don Rus directed Bounce?

[00:01:06] I didn't know that. That guy's got a weird career.

[00:01:09] That's what I'm saying! Bounce cast! Yeah, let's do Rus cast.

[00:01:12] The opposite of Pod. The Pod of...

[00:01:15] Yep. The opposite of Pod cast.

[00:01:19] Did you do a movie called Happy Endings too?

[00:01:22] He did. He did a movie called Happy Endings.

[00:01:24] He started Adam Pally and... No, no, no.

[00:01:26] Happy Accidents was Brad Anderson, right?

[00:01:28] I don't know.

[00:01:29] Okay, and there goes...

[00:01:30] Happy Endings is the one where like, Ted... Oh, it's Rosanne's husband's name.

[00:01:34] Tom Arnold. Tom Arnold!

[00:01:36] Yes.

[00:01:37] Gets like jerked off at a massage parlor.

[00:01:39] But Happy Accidents is Mercedome and Vincent Donferry are time traveling.

[00:01:43] Is that what that movie's called?

[00:01:46] Have you heard of this movie? You're not going to be introduced yet.

[00:01:48] I'm sure. Wait a second. Do you see that off in the horizon?

[00:01:51] That's our last listener turning off this episode.

[00:01:55] I see them waving goodbyes.

[00:01:57] All podcasts have been canceled.

[00:01:59] You're correct.

[00:02:01] And it was directed by Brad Anderson?

[00:02:03] It's... yes, whoever that... who's that?

[00:02:05] He did the machinist.

[00:02:07] Well, apparently it's about a woman who meets a man

[00:02:09] who claims to be from the year 2470.

[00:02:11] Thank you.

[00:02:13] Think...

[00:02:15] Phew.

[00:02:16] Apparently at the end they both turn out to be time travelers.

[00:02:19] Well, fuck that.

[00:02:21] Spoiler alert for Happy Accidents.

[00:02:23] And now, guess what? I will never watch that movie.

[00:02:25] That is the dumbest twist ending I have ever heard.

[00:02:30] But now on to Aloha, a great movie that we just watched.

[00:02:33] Imagine if the end of Sixth Sense was that Haley Delaasman is all so good.

[00:02:37] Everyone's dead.

[00:02:38] Yeah, that'd be good.

[00:02:42] Fuck all movies. My name's Griffin Newn. This is Blank Check, the podcast.

[00:02:45] The mini-series is called Weepodcast.

[00:02:47] We're going through the film to Cameron Crow.

[00:02:49] His most recent film.

[00:02:51] Your name's David Sims.

[00:02:53] We have a guest.

[00:02:55] She's great.

[00:02:57] We've been so excited to have her on the show, it's long overdue.

[00:02:59] We used to work together and sit next to each other.

[00:03:01] We did.

[00:03:03] I never worked with you.

[00:03:05] I wish I had the pleasure.

[00:03:07] I'm sure it'd be a great experience.

[00:03:09] But I've had a lot of fun nights after movie screening,

[00:03:12] discussions, parties, bars and stuff.

[00:03:14] You're always one of my favorite people to talk to.

[00:03:16] Currently of the AV Club.

[00:03:18] What's true?

[00:03:19] Long list. You've written for Refinery29,

[00:03:22] you've written for The Atlantic,

[00:03:24] you wrote for...

[00:03:25] The Atlantic Y.

[00:03:26] The Atlantic Y.

[00:03:27] Back in the day.

[00:03:28] RIP.

[00:03:29] Tim Weakley.

[00:03:30] Craft, many others.

[00:03:31] Yeah, I've done some freelancing around there.

[00:03:34] Esther Zuckerman is on the show.

[00:03:36] Thank you so much for being here.

[00:03:37] Thank you for having me.

[00:03:38] I'm very excited to talk about warmest aloha,

[00:03:40] I should say.

[00:03:41] Thank you.

[00:03:42] We need a warm aloha on this warm sunny human day.

[00:03:47] It's better than yesterday.

[00:03:49] Yeah, which was better than the day before.

[00:03:52] I feel like Monday was the worst.

[00:03:53] And tomorrow will be better.

[00:03:54] Let's hope so.

[00:03:55] It will, Griffin.

[00:03:57] Turn that frown upside down.

[00:03:58] Yeah.

[00:03:59] So this...

[00:04:00] We've gotten to Cameron Crowe's last

[00:04:03] theatrically released feature film.

[00:04:05] His eighth film?

[00:04:06] I believe so.

[00:04:08] Maybe this is the last movie he will ever make.

[00:04:10] It's his eighth film.

[00:04:11] It's his eighth film.

[00:04:12] It might be the last movie ever.

[00:04:14] Is he gonna make another movie?

[00:04:16] I don't think there's been anything in that.

[00:04:18] I heard him express no...

[00:04:20] Right.

[00:04:21] Yeah.

[00:04:22] Because when Elizabeth came out in Elizabeth Town,

[00:04:24] not Elizabeth with Cape Town.

[00:04:26] This was the next project.

[00:04:28] Yeah.

[00:04:29] And so then even when he made other things,

[00:04:31] he was like, oh well he's got his Hawaii movie

[00:04:33] that he's gotta do.

[00:04:34] Now I don't think anyone's like,

[00:04:37] oh, Cam's busy working on his Alaska movie.

[00:04:40] I mean he has roadies to keep him busy.

[00:04:42] He's got roadies.

[00:04:43] Did that get renewed?

[00:04:44] I don't think so yet.

[00:04:46] And of course we'll be discussing roadies next episode.

[00:04:48] How fun.

[00:04:49] How many episodes have you watched?

[00:04:50] Two.

[00:04:51] How many have you watched?

[00:04:52] Zero!

[00:04:53] I've watched one.

[00:04:54] I won't be here, but I've watched one.

[00:04:56] You can come back if you want to do it.

[00:04:58] I'll say this because a lot of my friends,

[00:05:01] such as you who work in entertainment writing

[00:05:03] and TV criticism and such,

[00:05:04] watch the first episode out of job obligations

[00:05:07] or more of a curiosity and they didn't watch the second one.

[00:05:10] I think the second one's better than the first.

[00:05:12] I honestly didn't hate the first one.

[00:05:14] I mean I hated a lot of parts of it,

[00:05:16] but as a whole I didn't like, I didn't hate it.

[00:05:19] I feel the same way.

[00:05:20] I thought I was going to continue watching it

[00:05:22] and then there was other television.

[00:05:24] It's not a show that demands,

[00:05:28] you don't leave the first episode being like,

[00:05:30] oh man I gotta see what happens next.

[00:05:32] There's no cliffhanger?

[00:05:33] In a time with like five million TV shows on the air.

[00:05:36] It's very hard to compel yourself to keep watching it.

[00:05:38] What's gonna happen to Image & Puts?

[00:05:40] Yes.

[00:05:41] I'm like, oh fuck you should watch Rodies.

[00:05:43] You know, because I know I gotta catch up with this thing

[00:05:45] because we're gonna have to cover it.

[00:05:46] Nah.

[00:05:47] But it's like I prefer watching the Incredibles again.

[00:05:50] I thought we said we would never do a TV show on this podcast again.

[00:05:54] Here we are.

[00:05:55] We're doing it again.

[00:05:56] I know.

[00:05:57] Thank God James Cameron never made a TV show.

[00:05:58] It's not terrible,

[00:05:59] but we'll talk about Rodies next week.

[00:06:01] Yeah, this is terrible.

[00:06:02] Aloha.

[00:06:03] Aloha.

[00:06:04] Aloha.

[00:06:05] Aloha.

[00:06:06] Can I say something?

[00:06:07] Aloha.

[00:06:08] But once again I don't know if this is like a Stockholm syndrome thing.

[00:06:10] Oh boy.

[00:06:11] I like the movie more The Second Time.

[00:06:13] Well, I thought I was gonna like it more The Second Time

[00:06:16] because it's so weird and discombobulating.

[00:06:19] Yeah.

[00:06:20] The first time.

[00:06:21] Well you have no idea what's going on.

[00:06:22] No.

[00:06:23] And I was like, or maybe The Second Time it's gonna click for me.

[00:06:25] So we all now have seen it twice?

[00:06:26] Yes.

[00:06:27] Yes.

[00:06:28] I saw it in theaters.

[00:06:29] I saw it with Pascas Pilot Veroit.

[00:06:30] We went to see it at the Williamsburg Cinema.

[00:06:32] In one of those, have you been there?

[00:06:34] No.

[00:06:35] Have you been there?

[00:06:36] Yes.

[00:06:37] You know, there's those theaters that are like down the stairs

[00:06:38] and very small and kind of, that's where they put,

[00:06:41] it was just me and her.

[00:06:42] Yeah.

[00:06:43] Just watching Aloha and just like, I think we were like,

[00:06:46] oh this is gonna be fun.

[00:06:47] We're gonna like, you know, have a laugh at Aloha

[00:06:50] and we just sort of sat there silently.

[00:06:53] I feel like I insisted that you go see it.

[00:06:55] We were doing the podcast at the time and you were like,

[00:06:57] I'm not gonna do it.

[00:06:58] And I was like, Aloha's fascinating.

[00:07:00] And it is.

[00:07:01] It is really interesting.

[00:07:02] It is really interesting.

[00:07:03] It's definitely.

[00:07:04] In a lot of ways.

[00:07:05] Yeah.

[00:07:06] But so the second, so the first time I like walked out of there

[00:07:09] and I was like, well that was a disaster.

[00:07:11] And also we were all just so mad about the casting

[00:07:14] and you know, that was all floating

[00:07:16] and that was very hard to ignore.

[00:07:17] And the second time I was like, well maybe I'll feel

[00:07:19] differently and then immediately I'm like,

[00:07:21] why is it a stone?

[00:07:23] Like immediately I snapped right back into it.

[00:07:25] I couldn't get over it.

[00:07:26] And here's another thing.

[00:07:27] You can't get over it.

[00:07:28] You can't.

[00:07:29] But you cannot get over it.

[00:07:31] It is inexcusable and it is awful.

[00:07:34] And I thought that having been said,

[00:07:36] this time I knew it was happening.

[00:07:38] So I didn't feel as much fresh out.

[00:07:40] But didn't everyone know it was happening the first time?

[00:07:42] Yeah we knew it was happening.

[00:07:43] Well I was going back and looking at the timeline, okay?

[00:07:45] So he originally announces this movie in like 2006

[00:07:48] or 2007, right?

[00:07:49] Right.

[00:07:50] When it was gonna be Reese Witherspoon playing the part.

[00:07:51] And Ben Stiller.

[00:07:52] And Ben Stiller.

[00:07:53] I was gonna say,

[00:07:54] Reese was definitely playing this part

[00:07:55] not the Rachel McAdams part.

[00:07:56] At that time he only announced one.

[00:07:58] Yeah, I mean you would think Emma's the lead.

[00:08:00] Also do we know that it was like exactly this character?

[00:08:03] I don't know.

[00:08:04] I don't know.

[00:08:05] I think the script changed a lot.

[00:08:07] I don't know, okay?

[00:08:09] But Reese Witherspoon was announced to be playing

[00:08:11] the female lead.

[00:08:12] I don't know if there was a second female lead

[00:08:14] at that point in the development.

[00:08:15] Right.

[00:08:16] And after we bought a zoo.

[00:08:17] All we knew was Ben and Reese.

[00:08:18] Right.

[00:08:19] Had they been in something?

[00:08:20] No, they were almost in like four movies together.

[00:08:22] Yeah it feels like they...

[00:08:23] There was that J.R.O.'s movie Use Guys

[00:08:25] which was also one of the like

[00:08:27] those movies that got pulled like three weeks before filming.

[00:08:29] Yeah, like Sprockets.

[00:08:30] Right.

[00:08:31] I think Deep Tiki was like two months away from filming.

[00:08:34] Like they were in pre-production.

[00:08:35] It's just that the reason it was named Deep Tiki

[00:08:37] for a really long time.

[00:08:38] Can I compliment one thing about the movie from the onset?

[00:08:41] Don't say that it's the title.

[00:08:43] I think they nailed the title.

[00:08:44] No, they blew the title.

[00:08:45] Warms Aloha.

[00:08:46] You can't make a movie called Aloha

[00:08:48] that's set in Hawaii and have the caspy three white people.

[00:08:52] I don't think that...

[00:08:54] You can't!

[00:08:55] I'm not even...

[00:08:56] It's another language!

[00:08:57] Can I make a point?

[00:08:58] I think that's the fault of the movie and not of the title.

[00:09:00] It's a bad title.

[00:09:01] What does the title even have to do with...

[00:09:03] Because he said goodbye to one relationship

[00:09:05] and say hello to another!

[00:09:06] No, no!

[00:09:07] Yes, the title is clever.

[00:09:09] His old life and his new life.

[00:09:11] I just wanted to say I just feel like Ben and Reese

[00:09:13] were in a movie together

[00:09:15] because they were both very famous at the same time.

[00:09:17] And they kept on getting attached to projects.

[00:09:19] That mid-auts like, ooh, Ben still in Reese Witherspoon.

[00:09:22] The Big A-List stars.

[00:09:24] That's a weird time.

[00:09:25] What a weird time.

[00:09:26] Yeah.

[00:09:27] I remember when the year that Meet the Parents came out.

[00:09:31] So this is already...

[00:09:32] 2000.

[00:09:33] Yes.

[00:09:34] It's already two years after there's something about Mary

[00:09:36] and he has some other films of varying success in between,

[00:09:40] but Meet the Parents was his second huge movie.

[00:09:43] People magazine, they're like,

[00:09:45] Entertainers of the Year wrote like,

[00:09:47] Who do you think...

[00:09:48] Not Entertainment Weekly?

[00:09:49] It wasn't Entertainment Weekly.

[00:09:50] Weird.

[00:09:51] I know the Entertainment Weekly...

[00:09:52] Entertainers of the Year is the branded...

[00:09:55] It wasn't...

[00:09:56] Yes.

[00:09:57] It wasn't the branded title.

[00:09:58] I mean it was, you know,

[00:09:59] important figures of the year, whatever it was.

[00:10:01] They were clearly wholesale ripping off Entertainment Weekly.

[00:10:04] Same parent company.

[00:10:06] My response was, ooh,

[00:10:08] because I was grossed out by how much they were ripping off.

[00:10:12] EW.

[00:10:13] If you catch my drift.

[00:10:15] This slash film article from 08 says Reese is probably playing Tracy,

[00:10:19] but they're not sure.

[00:10:20] Okay.

[00:10:21] Not Allison Ng.

[00:10:22] My sidebar here I was gonna say was just the fucking

[00:10:25] in this piece about Ben Stiller is one of their like important people of 2000.

[00:10:29] They were like,

[00:10:30] Who do you think was the lead of the biggest comedy film of the year?

[00:10:33] If you guessed Tim Allen or Jim Carrey, you'd be wrong.

[00:10:36] Would you believe that it was actually Ben Stiller?

[00:10:38] Like their position was this underdog.

[00:10:40] Even after there's something about Mary.

[00:10:42] They were like,

[00:10:43] Could you believe that Ben Stiller was the lead of the biggest comedy of the year?

[00:10:46] Also it's like comedy is like his thing at this point

[00:10:49] so it's not like comedy is the crazy part of this.

[00:10:52] They were fucking writing about him as if he was

[00:10:54] Charlton Copley like after District 9

[00:10:56] and it was like they found this guy working in an office

[00:10:58] and they made him the star of a movie and the movie did well.

[00:11:01] So the way slash film describes this project in 2008 is kind of fascinating.

[00:11:06] Okay.

[00:11:07] They say, you know, they explain like

[00:11:09] he's gonna play Brian Gilcrest,

[00:11:11] a disgraced US weapons consultant.

[00:11:13] Just, I mean right there you're hooked, right?

[00:11:15] Of course.

[00:11:16] His only friend is a techie named Jeremy,

[00:11:19] a super smart and highly aware computer.

[00:11:22] What?

[00:11:23] Now I think this is a typo.

[00:11:25] They must mean computer programmer.

[00:11:27] Nope.

[00:11:28] Or is it like the friends show within a show Mac and Cheese

[00:11:31] in which there was a robot called Cheese

[00:11:33] which I referenced in our Elizabethan kind of a second time.

[00:11:35] Yes, the second time you've referenced Mac and Cheese on this podcast.

[00:11:37] And I'm gonna try and reference every week from now on.

[00:11:39] Is it like Chappy?

[00:11:41] David that is not an error.

[00:11:43] I remember closely following Esther 15 comedy points.

[00:11:46] Very good, very good.

[00:11:47] I remember closely following the development of Deep Tiki at this time

[00:11:50] and that was the big thing that like they were being very hush hush about it

[00:11:53] but the movie was definitely about a guy being friends with a computer.

[00:11:56] That would be weird.

[00:11:59] I want to see that one.

[00:12:01] But the thing is that sounds weird but also Aloha's weird.

[00:12:04] It's not like Aloha, they like paired the weirdness out of it,

[00:12:07] you know, with multiple rewrites.

[00:12:09] It's still weird.

[00:12:10] Well he kills a satellite with the history of media.

[00:12:12] He does.

[00:12:14] The power of music.

[00:12:16] Together with the anal and humorless major Lisa Ing,

[00:12:19] so they changed her name.

[00:12:21] Okay, so they hadn't cast that part yet I guess.

[00:12:23] And apparently she's anal and humorless.

[00:12:25] Which is not exactly how I'd describe her character in this.

[00:12:27] I feel like there are hints for that.

[00:12:29] The first five minutes I'd say that's totally what she is.

[00:12:32] The first five minutes it's more, I mean she's very type A I guess.

[00:12:35] Sir, listen, but she's very like rigid.

[00:12:38] But also the first five minutes are really weird because she's like, you know,

[00:12:41] hi I'm here to assist you and he's like, I'm a renegade.

[00:12:44] Nobody get near me.

[00:12:45] I'm fucking crazy.

[00:12:46] Look, look at me.

[00:12:48] And you're like why is he so hostile?

[00:12:50] The first five minutes of the movie she is the most like rigid,

[00:12:53] humorless person in the world.

[00:12:55] And he's telling everyone how awful he is.

[00:12:57] He's like I'm a re...

[00:12:58] Right, and then it cuts to her and her hotel room talking to her mom

[00:13:01] going there's greatness in this guy.

[00:13:04] Which is, that scene upsets me so much.

[00:13:07] After that opening she's that quick.

[00:13:09] And now she, her shirt's untucked and she's got her hair undone.

[00:13:12] She's beautiful.

[00:13:13] Yeah, she's like sexy and she's like,

[00:13:15] and it's like very clear that she wants to like get with him.

[00:13:18] Oh yeah.

[00:13:19] I mean, alright, I have a lot of questions.

[00:13:21] But first let me just finish this.

[00:13:22] Yes.

[00:13:23] Gilcrest also gets blah blah blah gets a chance to meet with the low level

[00:13:26] his life he got away along with their husband and two kids.

[00:13:28] On the island he discovers himself.

[00:13:31] And then apparently there are visions of Hawaiian gods

[00:13:33] and they throw a sacrifice into a volcano.

[00:13:36] So they cut a lot of that.

[00:13:38] There are, I mean you have that part where you...

[00:13:40] And you also have the kid talking about the arrival.

[00:13:44] Which never pays off.

[00:13:45] It never pays off and I feel like there might have been

[00:13:47] a more supernatural version of this story

[00:13:49] that he was told like you can't do this.

[00:13:53] But it's bizarre because it feels like he handed that script

[00:13:56] and they were like, this is a little too weird.

[00:13:58] It's a little too complicated. Let's pare it down.

[00:14:00] And he paired it down 20% and they were like,

[00:14:02] you have a green life.

[00:14:03] And he should have paired it down like 70%.

[00:14:06] 20% is high. 8%.

[00:14:09] We're talking talking computer and throwing a ghost into a volcano.

[00:14:12] I already forgot about the talking computer.

[00:14:13] There are possibly ghosts in this movie then.

[00:14:15] 100%.

[00:14:16] But they're not like a prominent part which in a way makes it weirder.

[00:14:21] Right. I don't know.

[00:14:23] I think if you're a ghost movie, fucking own being a ghost movie.

[00:14:27] Yeah. No be a ghost movie.

[00:14:29] Yeah.

[00:14:30] Not like a quasi romcom slash...

[00:14:33] Right. All I was trying to say was at that point in the...

[00:14:37] I guess resource women had not been cast to play that part

[00:14:39] when they announced Emma Stone.

[00:14:40] Who knows? Who knows?

[00:14:41] It wasn't clear.

[00:14:42] You know, the ethnic background.

[00:14:43] I remember at least in my memory and I was Googling

[00:14:45] to try to figure out this timeline.

[00:14:47] The trailer didn't sort of imply her heritage at all.

[00:14:50] No. No. No.

[00:14:51] No. That was definitely something.

[00:14:52] It was the first way to critic saw it.

[00:14:54] When the preview screenings they were like,

[00:14:56] P.S. her character is Chinese and Hawaiian.

[00:14:59] But they held it off.

[00:15:00] Like no one saw the movie until like the week it came out.

[00:15:02] Maybe two weeks.

[00:15:03] Week before.

[00:15:04] You know, I mean they were not like proudly showing this movie.

[00:15:06] No.

[00:15:07] And the film was released when was it released?

[00:15:10] Oh no, May 29th.

[00:15:11] It had been pushed back.

[00:15:12] It was supposed to come out Christmas the previous year.

[00:15:16] In 2014 it was supposed to come out Christmas day.

[00:15:18] Yeah.

[00:15:19] And then in July of 2014 they pushed it back almost a full year.

[00:15:22] Yes.

[00:15:23] And it had already been shot like nine months earlier

[00:15:26] than the original date.

[00:15:28] So the movie was like coming out almost two years after it was shot.

[00:15:31] Right.

[00:15:32] I mean it's a very interesting Emma Stone timeline too.

[00:15:36] Yeah.

[00:15:37] Because...

[00:15:38] And bee coops.

[00:15:39] Well, and Emma, I, because I remember actually writing a piece

[00:15:42] for the wire, RIP.

[00:15:44] Remember?

[00:15:45] In 2014 talking about like how she needs something

[00:15:49] like better than Gwen Stacy.

[00:15:50] Oh I remember that piece.

[00:15:51] And I looked this up because I was like,

[00:15:54] hi I want to remember what I had said.

[00:15:56] And it was supposed to be Birdman and Untitled Cameron Crow

[00:16:01] project coming out that winter.

[00:16:03] Right, right, right.

[00:16:04] His best case scenario she was going to have a Spielberg year

[00:16:07] and it was going to be like she's going to get nominated

[00:16:09] for an Oscar for Birdman.

[00:16:10] And then...

[00:16:11] She did?

[00:16:12] And then Aloha is going to be her big like movie star

[00:16:15] romantic comedy.

[00:16:16] And she also had a Woody Allen movie coming out.

[00:16:18] Right.

[00:16:19] Yeah.

[00:16:20] Her first of two.

[00:16:21] Yeah, her first of two.

[00:16:22] Why am I not getting the name of this movie?

[00:16:24] Magic and the Moonlight.

[00:16:25] Because it was the most forgettable title in the world.

[00:16:27] Yeah.

[00:16:28] I mean I've seen Magic and the Moonlight.

[00:16:29] I have not seen a Rational Man, but she's also in.

[00:16:31] I saw it, but...

[00:16:32] Well, better.

[00:16:33] Well, better.

[00:16:34] It is better.

[00:16:35] It is 100% better.

[00:16:36] Magic and the Moonlight isn't anything at all.

[00:16:37] I mean a Rational Man is sort of interesting.

[00:16:39] A Rational Man is kind of interesting because it's

[00:16:41] a movie that hates itself.

[00:16:42] Yeah.

[00:16:43] It's like a movie that understands how disgusting it is.

[00:16:45] And it sort of understands...

[00:16:46] And it's sort of if you like whatever,

[00:16:48] it's a long tangent.

[00:16:49] But if you think about like there's a self criticism

[00:16:52] in it too.

[00:16:53] Yes.

[00:16:54] About a guy skirting responsibility.

[00:16:56] Yeah, and you're like, oh okay.

[00:16:58] Whereas Magic and the Moonlight is about a guy

[00:17:00] who has to prove that a woman is a liar.

[00:17:02] Yes.

[00:17:03] Yes.

[00:17:04] And then also fuck her.

[00:17:05] And then he does and her response is let's marry

[00:17:09] or whatever.

[00:17:10] Let's be together.

[00:17:11] And he's...

[00:17:12] Weird movie.

[00:17:13] Weird movie.

[00:17:14] Also Colin Firth is in Yellowface in the first

[00:17:16] scene of that movie.

[00:17:18] Yeah, I mean that's so buried under so many levels.

[00:17:21] It is.

[00:17:22] He's just playing someone who's...

[00:17:23] No, I know.

[00:17:24] I know.

[00:17:25] It's just Colin Firth.

[00:17:26] I don't like it.

[00:17:27] I'm not defending it.

[00:17:28] No, you can defend it.

[00:17:29] There's movies in which that would be...

[00:17:30] Okay, I like it.

[00:17:31] There's a thread here that goes right back to Aloha,

[00:17:34] unfortunately.

[00:17:35] Yes.

[00:17:36] The funny thing is though, like you say,

[00:17:38] Emma Stone had actually had a great 2014

[00:17:41] because she got an Oscar nomination.

[00:17:42] Sure, Amazing Spider-Man 2 didn't really

[00:17:44] go in there.

[00:17:45] And was coming off of doing Cabaret on Broadway

[00:17:46] which was a very well...

[00:17:47] Right.

[00:17:48] ...and I love it with Radley.

[00:17:49] Bradley Cooper had an amazing 2014.

[00:17:50] He was in the biggest movie of the year.

[00:17:52] Yeah.

[00:17:53] And he was Rocket in Guardians.

[00:17:55] You know, he was like having fun, right?

[00:17:57] I mean technically looking at the calendar

[00:17:59] because they counted American Sniper as a 2014 release,

[00:18:01] he had the first and third highest grossing films

[00:18:04] of that year.

[00:18:05] Right.

[00:18:06] And was coming off of three consecutive Oscar nominations,

[00:18:08] acting categories, and then additionally

[00:18:10] a fourth Oscar nomination for producing

[00:18:12] American Sniper.

[00:18:13] Yeah.

[00:18:14] So he's like really...

[00:18:15] I mean at that point it felt like

[00:18:17] he's now the guy.

[00:18:18] It's inarguable.

[00:18:19] Sure.

[00:18:20] So we kept arguing with it.

[00:18:22] So Stone was cast in this movie, I believe,

[00:18:24] in 2012.

[00:18:25] Makes sense.

[00:18:26] Okay, so that would have been right after

[00:18:28] the first Amazing Spider-Man?

[00:18:29] Right.

[00:18:30] I don't know when Cooper signed on to it.

[00:18:32] I couldn't quite...

[00:18:34] I don't remember.

[00:18:35] But I believe...

[00:18:36] I'll try and find it.

[00:18:37] But I believe like this is a sort of

[00:18:39] interesting mover because it's like

[00:18:40] after the first Amazing Spider-Man

[00:18:42] she's like has her franchise.

[00:18:44] She hasn't quite had...

[00:18:46] like she's had EZAs.

[00:18:47] She's been like sort of...

[00:18:49] October 2012 is when he was cast.

[00:18:51] Okay, so it feels like this looks to her

[00:18:54] like obviously it hadn't quite come out yet

[00:18:57] but this could be like a Silver Lining's

[00:18:59] playbook moment for her.

[00:19:01] I feel like this is like...

[00:19:02] It hadn't come out yet

[00:19:03] but I feel like this is like...

[00:19:05] she signs on to do it thinking like,

[00:19:07] okay great,

[00:19:08] like I'm going to be the lead

[00:19:09] in a Cameron Crow movie

[00:19:11] and still sort of trying to find that

[00:19:14] one thing that hits for her.

[00:19:16] Yes.

[00:19:17] Here's the thing,

[00:19:18] this thing makes sense,

[00:19:19] but Cameron Crow had not made...

[00:19:21] I don't care if you don't want to make fun of him.

[00:19:23] He hadn't made that movie in 15 years.

[00:19:26] Agreed.

[00:19:27] Like they're wanting like...

[00:19:28] They're thinking like,

[00:19:29] oh he's going to get me this movie,

[00:19:30] Crow, I mean because he's done it before

[00:19:32] but he hasn't done it.

[00:19:33] Okay, but I think Cameron Crow...

[00:19:35] I think actors signing on to a Cameron Crow movie

[00:19:38] are holding out the same kind of hope

[00:19:40] that me as like a die-hard Cameron Crow fan

[00:19:42] hold on to every time he announces

[00:19:43] a new thing which is like maybe

[00:19:44] this is the one where he gets it back.

[00:19:45] Did they read the script of the movie?

[00:19:48] I don't know.

[00:19:49] It's about the militarization of space.

[00:19:51] Here's a situation,

[00:19:53] because I was watching this film

[00:19:55] as like an actor who was embarrassed

[00:19:57] by most of the things I've been in, right?

[00:19:59] On a very different scale with no

[00:20:01] career to maintain or whatever.

[00:20:03] But I was like, okay,

[00:20:04] so you put aside the fact that

[00:20:05] they offer you this script, right?

[00:20:08] The script makes no sense.

[00:20:10] But they're saying do you want to go to Hawaii?

[00:20:12] You work with Cameron Crow who's like

[00:20:14] an important filmmaker,

[00:20:16] why the Rodney's at his peak?

[00:20:17] And you get to work with all these actors.

[00:20:19] On that level it's like why wouldn't I do this, right?

[00:20:21] If you're Danny McBride, why wouldn't you do it?

[00:20:23] Totally get it, totally get it.

[00:20:24] But then you go into Bradley Cooper and Emma Stone

[00:20:25] where it's like well they have...

[00:20:26] They're at these tipping points

[00:20:28] where it's like they have been like

[00:20:30] deemed potentially the next great movie stars.

[00:20:32] And they're just circling around this thing.

[00:20:34] And if you're in the zone that they're in in 2012

[00:20:37] it's like well you definitely have it right now

[00:20:39] but some people have it for two years

[00:20:41] and then it never comes back.

[00:20:42] And some people do enough work over a period of time

[00:20:44] that they become iconic and legendary.

[00:20:46] And like Julie Roberts hasn't made a movie

[00:20:48] that anyone's loved in a very long time

[00:20:49] but Julie Roberts will never stop being Julia Roberts.

[00:20:51] Right, well but Emma Stone is so similar to her

[00:20:53] but she's never had...

[00:20:55] We've had this discussion before.

[00:20:56] And this is the whole thing.

[00:20:57] This is what I think makes Aloha so fascinating

[00:20:59] and it ties into what you're saying David.

[00:21:02] Which is there's always this conversation

[00:21:04] about like why don't we have

[00:21:05] bankable female stars anymore?

[00:21:07] And it's because the thing that made

[00:21:08] bankable female stars were romantic comedies

[00:21:10] and dramas which studios aren't making a big way anymore.

[00:21:13] They're not making up.

[00:21:14] Jennifer Lawrence got so lucky that she had

[00:21:16] Silver Lines Playbook which was like

[00:21:18] an $18 million Miramax, why isn't it company movies?

[00:21:21] Right, that she had both in one year.

[00:21:24] And it's the right franchise.

[00:21:25] But the fact that like Silver Lines Playbook

[00:21:27] worked, that it connected that way

[00:21:29] that made that much money,

[00:21:30] that it got those Oscars that she won

[00:21:32] it was like it gave her that clout

[00:21:33] but then she hasn't made a movie like that

[00:21:35] since then other than the other David Russell movie.

[00:21:37] The thing about Stone that's interesting though too

[00:21:39] is that like she obviously was searching for this

[00:21:42] through these sort of old paths

[00:21:45] that don't work anymore because it's like

[00:21:47] Woody Allen and Cameron Crowe.

[00:21:49] I mean Blue Jasmine is sort of like

[00:21:51] an outlier at this point

[00:21:53] but in terms of these movies that he's been making

[00:21:56] and the parts that he'd be writing for an Emma Stone type

[00:21:59] not the right choice

[00:22:01] and same with like a Cameron Crowe thing.

[00:22:03] But this is my read of the situation.

[00:22:05] I feel like the people who used to have it

[00:22:08] and don't have it anymore

[00:22:10] but had it in such a large scale way

[00:22:12] are the only people who can get a movie

[00:22:14] like this made anymore.

[00:22:15] I don't think there's a young upstart

[00:22:17] who is Cameron Crowe who he was 20 years ago

[00:22:20] who can get a movie like this made on this scale

[00:22:23] with these actors and a studio budget, you know?

[00:22:25] I think the only people they're willing to take a chance on

[00:22:28] are people who made Hand in Her Sisters

[00:22:31] or made J.R. McGuire

[00:22:34] or whatever who made a human story that connected

[00:22:37] in a way like that.

[00:22:38] A movie star based like human

[00:22:40] bittersweet dramedy

[00:22:42] and that's the problem

[00:22:44] is they're only giving the chances to people

[00:22:46] who have lost the touch.

[00:22:47] They're not creating environment

[00:22:49] where anyone new can develop their voice

[00:22:51] and you look at if it does happen

[00:22:52] it happens in something like EZA

[00:22:54] because teen movies are like a programmer

[00:22:56] they have a genre

[00:22:57] and someone can pop being like a teen star

[00:22:59] or in a YA franchise

[00:23:01] but then if you're a young actress

[00:23:02] and now you're in your mid-20s

[00:23:03] and you want to get that thing

[00:23:04] that takes you to the next level

[00:23:06] it's like that movie doesn't really exist.

[00:23:08] You bet on doing like the Sundance version of that

[00:23:11] which is like

[00:23:13] you're probably working with a first time filmmaker

[00:23:15] with limited budget

[00:23:16] who knows if it's gonna work, this and that

[00:23:18] and at this point when you're making

[00:23:20] independent Sundance

[00:23:22] films where you're aiming to get into Sundance

[00:23:25] that's the goal

[00:23:26] you're not like an esoteric

[00:23:27] like fucking art house director

[00:23:28] you're trying to make Sundance Angelica

[00:23:31] summer alternative

[00:23:34] box search like comedies

[00:23:36] you have enough investors

[00:23:37] that they're actually having as much creative interference

[00:23:40] as a studio would

[00:23:42] and it's hard to get that through

[00:23:43] in a weird way more interference

[00:23:44] because you're not dealing with

[00:23:46] you're dealing with independent investors

[00:23:48] and financiers rather than a studio

[00:23:49] who at least has experience making movies

[00:23:51] a lot of times

[00:23:53] and so it's very hard for someone

[00:23:55] like Emma Stone to find her thing

[00:23:56] and you get people like Emma Stone

[00:23:57] who are just stuck in this

[00:23:58] neither here nor there

[00:24:00] where it's like everyone kind of loves her

[00:24:02] there's like no one arguing that she's not

[00:24:04] like a great actress and a great movie star

[00:24:07] but she doesn't really have the things that show it

[00:24:10] I would argue that she's not a great actress

[00:24:12] I don't think she's a great actress

[00:24:13] I think she's a very good actress

[00:24:14] I maybe over say that a little bit

[00:24:15] She's a promising actress

[00:24:16] I think she's a very good actress

[00:24:17] I don't know if she's done anything that

[00:24:18] I mean makes me think she's

[00:24:20] a good actress

[00:24:21] Not in five years

[00:24:23] like I mean certainly at the start of her career

[00:24:25] it was like oh you know

[00:24:26] this is someone to watch out for

[00:24:27] but I also think it's like

[00:24:29] she's a great personality

[00:24:30] and she's a great actress

[00:24:31] She's an incredible actress

[00:24:32] in terms of you know charisma

[00:24:33] and stuff like that

[00:24:34] but in terms of playing levels

[00:24:37] and doing different things

[00:24:39] Maybe La La Land will change everything

[00:24:41] Well see I feel like La La Land

[00:24:43] might be the exactly right thing for her

[00:24:46] That's her hope, yeah

[00:24:47] I feel like La La Land

[00:24:48] if it is good

[00:24:49] is like it's a musical

[00:24:51] she can sing, she can dance

[00:24:53] she can be charismatic

[00:24:54] and she probably doesn't have to do something

[00:24:57] that is wildly away from like

[00:24:59] what she is as a person

[00:25:01] and an entertainer

[00:25:02] Yes

[00:25:03] Yeah, that's the hope

[00:25:05] I don't know man

[00:25:07] I don't know

[00:25:08] That's my contribution

[00:25:09] About La La Land or just about everything?

[00:25:10] Oh I definitely don't know about La La Land

[00:25:13] I just

[00:25:14] I mean

[00:25:15] I have to

[00:25:16] see that to believe it

[00:25:17] I'm sorry

[00:25:18] I'm just you can't convince me

[00:25:19] that's gonna be good

[00:25:20] I wanted to be good

[00:25:21] I wanted to be so good

[00:25:22] I don't

[00:25:23] necessarily have faith in it yet

[00:25:25] but I just wanted to be good

[00:25:26] I think it's gonna be arch

[00:25:28] is like my key thing

[00:25:29] Yeah I love arch it

[00:25:31] I'm fine with arch

[00:25:32] but I just don't think

[00:25:33] it'll connect on a broader level

[00:25:34] if it is

[00:25:35] Yeah

[00:25:36] I don't know

[00:25:37] I think it just looks like a tough sell

[00:25:40] A real tough sell

[00:25:41] Yeah although the internet

[00:25:43] was crushing real hard in it

[00:25:45] They like the trailer

[00:25:46] Yeah

[00:25:47] Remember when she was in

[00:25:48] Crazy Stupid Love in 2011

[00:25:49] She's really good in that

[00:25:50] And that's an attempt to make

[00:25:52] you know a pretty broad rom-com

[00:25:54] But she's also like supporting in that

[00:25:56] I mean that's a movie where it's like

[00:25:57] two different romances

[00:25:58] and the men in the romances

[00:25:59] are definitely the two leads

[00:26:01] That movie is a mistake

[00:26:03] Crazy Stupid Love

[00:26:04] She's very good

[00:26:05] Yeah

[00:26:06] I definitely saw it

[00:26:08] and I remember her being charming

[00:26:10] It's not a movie that's stuck with me

[00:26:12] No

[00:26:13] What's the matter Esther

[00:26:14] I was just

[00:26:15] I feel like she's made a lot of

[00:26:17] mistakes

[00:26:18] Well here's her run

[00:26:19] You know

[00:26:20] Super bad

[00:26:21] She's out in the world

[00:26:22] Boom

[00:26:23] And then like supporting roles in

[00:26:25] The Rocker and the House Bunny

[00:26:27] and Ghost of Girlfriends Past

[00:26:28] I like the House Bunny

[00:26:29] House Bunny's cute

[00:26:30] But like these are supporting roles

[00:26:31] I'll say this

[00:26:32] That run of supporting roles through

[00:26:33] the zombie land

[00:26:34] is kind of what makes me

[00:26:35] really take notice of her

[00:26:36] because in all of them

[00:26:37] she's playing totally different characters

[00:26:39] That's true

[00:26:40] In those early films

[00:26:41] she's not doing the movie star thing

[00:26:42] She's actually doing like

[00:26:43] And her

[00:26:44] nerd in House Bunny

[00:26:45] is very different than her

[00:26:46] nerd and ghost of girlfriends past

[00:26:48] They're very specific

[00:26:49] and both attuned to the film

[00:26:51] as someone who has unfortunately

[00:26:52] seen both the House Bunny

[00:26:53] and Ghost of Girlfriend

[00:26:54] She's really good in House Bunny

[00:26:55] And then you got zombie land

[00:26:57] And she plays a badass in that

[00:26:59] and she plays it as a real human being

[00:27:00] and not as like a

[00:27:01] fucking stock figure

[00:27:02] and she's good in it

[00:27:03] And then you got easy A

[00:27:04] and it's like she gets

[00:27:05] the Golden Globe nomination

[00:27:06] and everyone's like yeah right

[00:27:07] we're cooking with gas here right

[00:27:08] Yeah

[00:27:09] And then

[00:27:10] well she's barely in friends

[00:27:11] that benefit

[00:27:12] Yeah she says two seconds

[00:27:13] She's the breakup at the beginning

[00:27:14] of the film

[00:27:15] So in 2011

[00:27:16] Crazy Stupid Love

[00:27:17] I think people were excited

[00:27:19] but it doesn't go anywhere

[00:27:20] and then the help

[00:27:21] Well that movie

[00:27:22] Which she's the worst thing about

[00:27:24] but like it's not really her fault

[00:27:26] I disagree with that

[00:27:27] I think she's good in that

[00:27:28] And I think the help is the first time

[00:27:30] you see her being like

[00:27:31] okay like let me find this thing

[00:27:33] that's going to like

[00:27:35] make me serious

[00:27:36] Apologize to her

[00:27:37] I think the help

[00:27:38] her performance in the help

[00:27:39] ruins the movie

[00:27:40] I disagree with that

[00:27:41] Because she's playing it

[00:27:42] like she's from now

[00:27:43] She's not playing it

[00:27:44] like she should

[00:27:45] She's not playing it

[00:27:46] like someone in the sixth

[00:27:47] I think the movie

[00:27:48] ruins the movie

[00:27:49] Well I mean I think

[00:27:50] I have seen that movie once

[00:27:52] I will never watch it ever again

[00:27:53] But while watching it

[00:27:54] I remember thinking

[00:27:55] that I thought she was very good

[00:27:56] And I think the movie is

[00:27:57] I do like Emma Stone

[00:27:59] I'm not even trying to fight that

[00:28:01] You're rooting for Emma Stone

[00:28:03] I'm rooting for her real hard

[00:28:04] Crazy Stupid Love

[00:28:05] to say it didn't do anything

[00:28:06] for her I think is a little

[00:28:07] untrue because

[00:28:08] A it did well

[00:28:09] Did it?

[00:28:10] It did like 75 or 80

[00:28:12] I think domestic

[00:28:13] Pretty good

[00:28:14] Yeah

[00:28:15] And B

[00:28:16] Everyone was sort of talking about

[00:28:18] the Gosling Stone

[00:28:20] 85 domestic

[00:28:21] Thank you

[00:28:22] Pretty good

[00:28:23] For a movie nobody likes

[00:28:24] 85 domestic

[00:28:25] For a movie that costs very little

[00:28:27] 50 million dollars

[00:28:28] How much did it make overseas?

[00:28:29] Another like

[00:28:30] I don't know

[00:28:31] It clears like 130 or 120

[00:28:33] Okay and I guarantee it's

[00:28:34] well on home video

[00:28:35] That's a home video

[00:28:36] That's a fucking Red Box movie

[00:28:37] No I'm just saying 50 mil for that

[00:28:38] I remember there being

[00:28:39] It doesn't take place in like

[00:28:40] free houses

[00:28:41] Yeah but it's got like

[00:28:42] a ton of actors in

[00:28:43] I remember there being

[00:28:44] a lot of excitement

[00:28:45] over the Gosling

[00:28:46] stone chemistry

[00:28:47] But still is so much excited

[00:28:48] They have not made a good

[00:28:49] movie together

[00:28:50] No but to say

[00:28:51] Thanks to squad

[00:28:52] Yeah

[00:28:53] But people love them together

[00:28:54] They do

[00:28:55] So to say it did nothing for

[00:28:56] isn't really accurate

[00:28:57] because there was this thing of

[00:28:58] like okay we got something

[00:28:59] bottled here

[00:29:00] There is somewhere a great

[00:29:01] Ryan Gosling

[00:29:02] Emma Stone movie

[00:29:03] It's also I feel like

[00:29:04] she or her staying power

[00:29:07] is largely because of gifts

[00:29:09] as well

[00:29:10] Interesting

[00:29:11] Like I feel like

[00:29:12] Young person

[00:29:13] What?

[00:29:14] This is the young person's

[00:29:15] This is my sort of theory

[00:29:18] is that like

[00:29:19] she has the staying power

[00:29:20] for having been in like

[00:29:22] this you know

[00:29:23] not like nothing that has

[00:29:26] really been like

[00:29:27] oh my god like amazing

[00:29:29] because she is all over

[00:29:31] the internet constantly

[00:29:33] There's that I roll gift

[00:29:35] from easy a

[00:29:36] there's like

[00:29:37] I'm not sure

[00:29:38] you know you have

[00:29:39] I think like

[00:29:40] her jumping on

[00:29:42] Ryan Gosling

[00:29:43] in crazy stupid love

[00:29:45] You look like your photo shop

[00:29:46] Yeah you look like

[00:29:47] your photo shop

[00:29:48] which maybe isn't a gift

[00:29:49] but like more of a clip

[00:29:50] Well the gift with the little

[00:29:51] Yeah with the little thing

[00:29:52] There's a line they really

[00:29:53] tried to sell

[00:29:54] the Photoshop line

[00:29:55] remember that was like

[00:29:56] their trailer

[00:29:57] They sold it I bought it

[00:29:58] And then there's like

[00:29:59] the Jimmy Fallon

[00:30:02] lip sync battle thing

[00:30:04] which she

[00:30:06] she made take off

[00:30:08] and there's all I do is win

[00:30:09] I love how Jimmy Fallon

[00:30:10] has celebrities on his show

[00:30:11] and stuff

[00:30:12] I don't know what to say about that

[00:30:13] Sorry carry on

[00:30:14] But like her doing

[00:30:15] like all I do is win

[00:30:16] is like a

[00:30:18] Wait I'm sorry

[00:30:19] Who did you hear?

[00:30:20] Ben

[00:30:21] He was laughing at my Fallon joke

[00:30:23] Producer Ben?

[00:30:24] Who?

[00:30:25] The Ben Deucer

[00:30:27] The Poet Laureate

[00:30:28] Mr. Positive

[00:30:29] Positive

[00:30:30] Mr. Positive we can buy

[00:30:31] I know I know

[00:30:32] The Poet Laureate

[00:30:33] The Peeper

[00:30:34] The Tiebreaker

[00:30:35] Birthday Benny

[00:30:37] Yeah recently

[00:30:38] Do not call him

[00:30:39] Professor Crisp

[00:30:40] There you sir

[00:30:41] Do call him the fuck master

[00:30:43] Over time he has

[00:30:44] graduated different titles

[00:30:46] Oh my god

[00:30:47] Such as

[00:30:49] Producer Ben Kanovi

[00:30:50] Kylo Ben

[00:30:51] Ben Aysh Shalmalan

[00:30:53] Ben Seyit

[00:30:54] We recently concluded a poll

[00:30:56] We're tabulating the results

[00:30:57] and are going to confer about

[00:30:59] what his title is going to be

[00:31:00] at the end of this

[00:31:04] Wish him a hearty

[00:31:05] a loha fennel

[00:31:06] Ladies and gentlemen Ben Hosley

[00:31:08] Guys what an episode so far

[00:31:10] All Emma Stone

[00:31:12] No Aloha

[00:31:13] Yeah and I don't

[00:31:14] I just don't follow the biz

[00:31:16] like y'all

[00:31:17] So I've got really nothing to add

[00:31:20] We should really get to Aloha

[00:31:22] But let me just give you her

[00:31:24] 20s

[00:31:25] Also I did cut off Aster because

[00:31:26] Well she was

[00:31:27] I didn't know Ben was in the studio

[00:31:28] I didn't know I was surprised that Ben was in this

[00:31:30] And I'll just say this

[00:31:31] I too David like when Jimmy Fallon

[00:31:33] has celebrities on the show

[00:31:34] We agree

[00:31:35] You know what's really cool

[00:31:36] It's that everything they're doing

[00:31:38] is just so great

[00:31:39] So relatable

[00:31:40] I never knew the celebrities could play beer pong before

[00:31:42] Dude and they're really good at it sometimes

[00:31:45] And that's like me

[00:31:47] We've had two Tonight Show writers

[00:31:49] as guests on this show

[00:31:50] We have those

[00:31:51] I was a

[00:31:52] Yeah

[00:31:53] Aster what were you going to say

[00:31:54] I was just going to say that she lives

[00:31:55] She has this like strong internet presence

[00:31:57] That is not necessary

[00:31:58] That is tied to her movies

[00:32:00] But only sort of tangentially

[00:32:02] Is she on the Twitter or anything like that

[00:32:04] She's not

[00:32:05] She's not on the brand

[00:32:06] But it's similar to Jennifer Lawrence

[00:32:09] And that like

[00:32:10] She is

[00:32:11] No she's just a

[00:32:12] A sector of the internet

[00:32:14] And I think she's sort of become

[00:32:16] In a small sector

[00:32:17] A sort of a generational spirit animal

[00:32:19] Yes

[00:32:20] A lot of young women

[00:32:21] Especially like teenage girls

[00:32:22] I mean my sister who's younger

[00:32:23] I feel like really feels like

[00:32:24] Oh and a stone like represents

[00:32:26] And they grew up and they saw EZA

[00:32:27] When they were 10

[00:32:28] And so that was a big one for them

[00:32:29] Or whatever

[00:32:30] And they

[00:32:31] Were running to see Aloha probably

[00:32:33] Nobody ran to see this movie

[00:32:35] So in 2012 she has the amazing

[00:32:37] Spider-Man where she's unfortunately

[00:32:39] Overshadowed by Dennis Leary

[00:32:41] And then Ganksher

[00:32:42] Giving the best performance of 2012

[00:32:43] Correct and then Ganksher Squad in 2013

[00:32:45] Which is like I mean like a huge bomb

[00:32:47] That's actually a movie that doesn't exist

[00:32:49] It really is

[00:32:50] That really is a movie that doesn't exist

[00:32:51] It came out on December 32nd or something

[00:32:53] Like that's how much it doesn't exist

[00:32:55] Warner Brothers tried to get like

[00:32:57] Fucking like they bought that book

[00:32:59] And they were like this is a huge film

[00:33:00] And they offered it to like

[00:33:01] Aronofsky, Affleck, Eastwood

[00:33:03] Like all their biggest guys

[00:33:05] And then they were like Rubin Fletcher

[00:33:07] And then he assembles

[00:33:08] He assembles an incredible cast

[00:33:11] And then the movie doesn't fucking exist

[00:33:13] Well I mean there is a reason

[00:33:14] Another reason

[00:33:15] Outside of the movie itself

[00:33:16] For the movie not fucking existing

[00:33:18] Which is The Dark Knight Rises

[00:33:19] In the shooting

[00:33:20] And it was about to come out

[00:33:21] Right

[00:33:22] During that period

[00:33:23] They had to push it

[00:33:24] Because there was literally

[00:33:25] A shot in the trailer where they

[00:33:26] Pop out of a movie screen

[00:33:27] Shooting guns at the audience

[00:33:28] And in the movie as well

[00:33:30] Which I believe they had to remove

[00:33:31] Yes

[00:33:32] Right so it came out in January

[00:33:33] Right they had to reshoot

[00:33:34] Yeah it was just in January

[00:33:35] And they were like

[00:33:36] But the other weird thing about that

[00:33:38] Is like they were like

[00:33:39] This is a big movie

[00:33:40] And then it came out in January

[00:33:42] And it got 0%

[00:33:44] Like reviews

[00:33:45] And it was never a good movie

[00:33:47] That's what it's about

[00:33:48] No

[00:33:49] It was never either

[00:33:50] Do you know what the name of that movie was

[00:33:52] Gangster Squad

[00:33:53] Yeah

[00:33:54] I at 8 year old would write a title

[00:33:56] Like a movie with that title

[00:33:57] Yeah

[00:33:58] Gangster Squad

[00:33:59] Josh Brolin, Ryan Gosling

[00:34:00] Emma Stone

[00:34:01] Anthony Mackie

[00:34:02] Giovanni Rabisi

[00:34:05] Oh boy

[00:34:07] And then she's in movie

[00:34:08] Then she's in movie 43

[00:34:10] In The Croods

[00:34:11] So I mean obviously upswing there

[00:34:13] Yeah I mean she's great in The Croods

[00:34:14] And then Amazing Spider-Man 2

[00:34:16] Which is another movie that doesn't exist

[00:34:18] It doesn't exist

[00:34:19] Isn't it crazy how we just forgot

[00:34:21] That movie existed

[00:34:22] That's not true

[00:34:23] I mean it exists in the same way

[00:34:24] That Freddy Crooger exists

[00:34:25] And that it sneaks into my dreams

[00:34:26] And stabs me

[00:34:28] And then magic in the moonlight

[00:34:30] That's a bad run

[00:34:31] That isn't objectively

[00:34:32] And then you know she gets Birdman

[00:34:34] And that's supposed to be the bounce back

[00:34:35] And let's also point out that during that run

[00:34:38] Jennifer Lawrence jumps up like 17 years

[00:34:40] Jennifer Lawrence is like the big

[00:34:42] Anointed the big star of her generation

[00:34:44] And it feels a little bit like

[00:34:46] Jennifer Lawrence stole

[00:34:47] Like not stole but got to the finish line

[00:34:49] Before Emma Stone

[00:34:50] But got to the thing that they were both

[00:34:51] Running towards and now is just lapping her

[00:34:54] Can you just quickly look up

[00:34:55] What Emma Stone's character's name is

[00:34:56] In The Croods

[00:34:58] It's Eep Crude

[00:34:59] Okay

[00:35:01] Glad I had that for you

[00:35:03] And then so Birdman

[00:35:05] So as we were saying Birdman does well

[00:35:06] Okay

[00:35:07] She gets an Oscar nomination

[00:35:08] Great

[00:35:09] Here comes Aloha

[00:35:10] Oh no

[00:35:11] Oh no

[00:35:12] Because we're fascinated with this movie

[00:35:15] Oh

[00:35:16] Noha

[00:35:18] One comedy point

[00:35:20] But she got the most shit for this movie

[00:35:24] Right

[00:35:26] Yes which I

[00:35:28] Okay so I was talking about this

[00:35:29] It's unavoidable

[00:35:30] She's going to get the most shit for this

[00:35:31] I was talking about this with

[00:35:33] A friend of the podcast friend of my life

[00:35:34] Sophie Fader who I invoke many times

[00:35:36] Great person

[00:35:37] Because she's my voice of reason in my life

[00:35:39] And

[00:35:41] She was saying like just

[00:35:43] You know having not seen the film

[00:35:44] I was telling her like oh yeah

[00:35:45] I got to go watch Aloha tonight

[00:35:48] She was like

[00:35:49] What do you do if you're Emma Stone

[00:35:50] In that situation

[00:35:52] What do you do

[00:35:54] Say I can't play this character's written

[00:35:56] I can't be Hawaiian and Jamaican

[00:35:58] I mean

[00:36:00] Chinese

[00:36:01] Why did I say Jamaican

[00:36:03] That would be amazing if she was like

[00:36:04] I'm half Jamaican half Hawaiian

[00:36:06] Yeah

[00:36:07] And then

[00:36:11] Go on

[00:36:12] And then half Swedish so that negates everything

[00:36:14] Yeah right

[00:36:15] I like that you had to pick like the whitest

[00:36:17] The whitest

[00:36:18] I mean how else do you explain

[00:36:19] She's white

[00:36:20] She's a very white woman

[00:36:21] Remember the part of the movie where she shows a picture of her parents

[00:36:24] Yes I do

[00:36:26] I mean

[00:36:29] So the problem is and as you're saying

[00:36:31] What do you do if you're Emma Stone

[00:36:32] They offer you the film

[00:36:33] They go hey Emma Stone here it is on your desk

[00:36:36] Maybe you meet with Cameron Crow first

[00:36:37] And you're a fan of Cameron Crow

[00:36:38] And you go meet with him

[00:36:39] And then they send you the script

[00:36:40] And you read it

[00:36:41] And they go

[00:36:42] $5 million on the table

[00:36:43] The role is yours if you want

[00:36:44] But there are other people

[00:36:45] My question though is like

[00:36:47] There are other people

[00:36:48] In between her and Cameron Crow

[00:36:51] Probably

[00:36:52] Yes

[00:36:53] In terms of

[00:36:54] And doesn't someone

[00:36:55] I mean I probably not because Hollywood is so fucked up

[00:36:58] In terms of this

[00:36:59] But like doesn't someone look at the script and go

[00:37:01] Huh

[00:37:02] This character's name is Alice in Ing

[00:37:04] Huh

[00:37:05] She has a whole speech about how she is Chinese and Hawaiian

[00:37:11] Emma

[00:37:12] Like maybe we should think about this

[00:37:14] The terrible reality is

[00:37:15] No

[00:37:16] All those people read it

[00:37:17] And they think that

[00:37:18] And they go yeah but we need a bankable name

[00:37:20] I'm trying to find his apology

[00:37:22] Because he wrote like

[00:37:23] Yes he did

[00:37:24] Yeah

[00:37:25] So the other problem I was going to say is

[00:37:27] Like it would be one thing

[00:37:28] And it would still be a big problem

[00:37:31] If the character was presented as being Hawaiian for some reason

[00:37:35] But that was that

[00:37:36] I don't know

[00:37:37] But like the other thing is like

[00:37:38] She's obsessed with Hawaiian culture

[00:37:40] And trying to prove to everyone

[00:37:41] In an upsetting way

[00:37:43] Yeah

[00:37:44] You know I mean

[00:37:45] The movie strikes you when you're watching

[00:37:47] Is like this feels like a very touristy movie

[00:37:50] That is taking very broad tropes about Hawaiian culture

[00:37:52] It's white man's Hawaii

[00:37:53] And kind of just like you know

[00:37:55] Like a movie like The Descendants

[00:37:57] Which I don't like

[00:37:58] I don't like it either

[00:37:59] Doesn't try to do this quite as badly

[00:38:01] Where is the

[00:38:02] No and they at least go

[00:38:03] He's like eight generations away

[00:38:05] Well and also he's being presented

[00:38:07] Is like a white land baron in Hawaii

[00:38:09] And there's like some tension to that

[00:38:11] Whereas this is like a bunch of white people

[00:38:13] Come to Hawaii to like

[00:38:15] You know truck with the sabbathons

[00:38:17] Yeah to get a gay blessing out of them

[00:38:19] And

[00:38:20] What's a gay blessing

[00:38:22] I mean

[00:38:23] I think I figured it out now

[00:38:25] But I think I maybe figure this movie out

[00:38:27] Oh well

[00:38:28] I'm excited to hear that in one second

[00:38:30] But the fact that she is like

[00:38:32] The gatekeeper of Hawaiian culture in the movie

[00:38:34] That she is the one who like

[00:38:36] Delivers all this information and like

[00:38:38] I don't know seems so obsessed with

[00:38:40] It's so bad

[00:38:42] It's like such an

[00:38:43] Absolutely disastrous idea

[00:38:45] Okay you want my ranking of solutions in order

[00:38:47] Yes

[00:38:48] Number one

[00:38:49] Higher an actress of Hawaiian descent

[00:38:51] Or higher an actress with some Asian heritage

[00:38:54] Because like his whole idea for the character

[00:38:56] Is that she looks white and

[00:38:58] But has Hawaiian heritage

[00:38:59] And Cameron Crowe said in his apology

[00:39:01] That the fact that she keeps on pushing it so much

[00:39:03] Was meant to be a joke because he knows someone

[00:39:05] He claims who is a quarter Hawaiian

[00:39:07] And doesn't look at it all

[00:39:09] And always bragging about

[00:39:10] Not bragging about it but always talking about

[00:39:12] How proud she is of it

[00:39:13] And that was supposed to be the joke

[00:39:14] In the film it feels like them

[00:39:16] Explaining away the problem

[00:39:17] It doesn't play as a joke at all

[00:39:18] And if it was a joke it'd be a fucked up joke

[00:39:20] Yeah, yeah

[00:39:22] Saying that it's a joke doesn't make it better

[00:39:24] No but it also definitely doesn't play as a joke

[00:39:26] Like if the joke had worked it still would be

[00:39:28] If it felt comedic it still would be shitty

[00:39:31] But it also doesn't feel comedic watching the film

[00:39:34] No, yeah

[00:39:35] It's double shitty

[00:39:36] Yeah

[00:39:37] Because they failed doing a shitty thing

[00:39:39] His apology is not good

[00:39:41] No it's bad

[00:39:42] I remember at the time being not good

[00:39:43] And I'm rereading it now and it's not good

[00:39:44] Because he's basically like

[00:39:46] You know he's explaining this idea that

[00:39:48] Oh you know she's supposed to look white

[00:39:49] Because that's the character

[00:39:50] And she's based on a real person

[00:39:51] Quote unquote you know whatever the fuck that means

[00:39:53] Yeah

[00:39:54] And then he's like but we did employ a lot of Hawaiians

[00:39:57] And Bumpy

[00:39:58] He keeps on bragging about Bumpy

[00:39:59] But it's like yeah you employed some Hawaiian actors

[00:40:02] Who are very low on the cast list

[00:40:04] Yeah

[00:40:05] Don't do much

[00:40:06] Right

[00:40:07] And then like are you saying you employed some crew guys

[00:40:09] I mean like what's his argument like

[00:40:11] How dare you I came to Hawaii and like gave them job

[00:40:13] Who's above the title on this movie

[00:40:15] Bradley Cooper

[00:40:16] Emma Stone

[00:40:17] Rachel McAdams

[00:40:18] Bill Murray

[00:40:19] Danny McBride

[00:40:20] Alec Baldwin

[00:40:21] John Krasinski

[00:40:22] Those are the people above the title

[00:40:24] Seven names

[00:40:25] Seven names above the title

[00:40:26] And then even when you go below that

[00:40:28] I think the next couple of names are

[00:40:30] The two kids

[00:40:31] You have Bill Camp

[00:40:32] Right you know

[00:40:33] I mean it's like Michael Cherness

[00:40:35] Who plays his friend on the other side of the phone

[00:40:38] Like I mean you probably have to go like

[00:40:41] 12 or 13 names deep in this film

[00:40:44] Bumpy is the highest and he's playing himself

[00:40:47] Right

[00:40:48] And he's on a shared title card with

[00:40:50] Three to four other actors

[00:40:52] Oh boy

[00:40:54] Bad idea

[00:40:56] Number two I think solution is

[00:41:00] You know I mean these two are tied I'd say

[00:41:03] I'd say number two is

[00:41:06] Don't make her Hawaiian

[00:41:07] No

[00:41:08] If you want to cast Emma Stone

[00:41:09] Then you have to pick one or the other

[00:41:10] It doesn't have anything to do with the movie

[00:41:12] Exactly

[00:41:13] It really doesn't

[00:41:14] It doesn't play into the story much at all

[00:41:16] You have to pick one or the other

[00:41:17] Either the character is Hawaiian

[00:41:18] Or you want to work with Emma Stone

[00:41:19] Right

[00:41:20] Those two things are mutually exclusive

[00:41:21] I think the third option

[00:41:23] Oh boy

[00:41:24] Is

[00:41:25] She was raised in Hawaii

[00:41:27] She is white with white parents

[00:41:29] And she feels attached to the culture

[00:41:30] But you never have her claim that she's Hawaiian

[00:41:32] Not a great option though

[00:41:33] Not a great option

[00:41:34] It's a distant thing

[00:41:35] But you already have that in the kids

[00:41:37] Exactly

[00:41:38] What about option four

[00:41:39] Don't make the movie

[00:41:40] Vanilla, sky

[00:41:41] I'm sorry

[00:41:42] Vanilla, sky

[00:41:43] Vanilla, sky

[00:41:44] Two

[00:41:45] Two

[00:41:46] Open your eyes

[00:41:47] That's the subtitle

[00:41:48] Eyes wide open

[00:41:49] Eyes wide open

[00:41:50] That'd be a good sequel

[00:41:51] Because he made a movie called

[00:41:52] Eyes wide open

[00:41:53] He made a movie called Eyes Wide Shut

[00:41:55] So Vanilla Sky 2 Eyes Wide Open

[00:41:57] It's a combo sequel

[00:41:58] It's like MIB 23

[00:42:01] That's never going to happen right

[00:42:02] I just heard an interview with Jonah Hill

[00:42:04] Where he was like

[00:42:05] That's not actually going to happen

[00:42:06] That's the stupidest idea I ever heard

[00:42:08] Another thing is that

[00:42:09] Those two movies are both

[00:42:11] Loja and MIB 23

[00:42:12] Are both like

[00:42:13] Intracle in the Sony hacks

[00:42:15] This movie is like

[00:42:16] The folk about so many different

[00:42:18] Things

[00:42:19] We really don't want to talk about this movie

[00:42:22] Yeah

[00:42:23] How long have we been going, Ben?

[00:42:25] 42 minutes

[00:42:27] That's the end of our episode

[00:42:29] So the plot of the movie

[00:42:31] And this is crazy for Cameron

[00:42:33] Let's see if you can pull it off

[00:42:34] Is that a disgraced

[00:42:36] Former Air Force pilot

[00:42:38] Military

[00:42:39] I don't actually

[00:42:40] US military

[00:42:42] He's disgraced

[00:42:43] Well you're still saying

[00:42:44] That he used to be grated

[00:42:45] Cameron Crowe wrote a movie

[00:42:46] About someone who's disgraced

[00:42:47] And now he's haunted by his failures

[00:42:49] Okay

[00:42:50] He comes to Hawaii

[00:42:51] To organize a traditional

[00:42:52] Gate blessing

[00:42:54] Now he's a military contractor

[00:42:56] Yes, he works for a billionaire

[00:42:57] Called Carson Welch

[00:42:59] Played by Bill Murray

[00:43:00] Played by Bill Murray

[00:43:01] You know, really locked in

[00:43:02] Engaged performance from Bill Murray

[00:43:04] Can I say, I think this

[00:43:05] He honestly thinks like

[00:43:06] It's like they both fingered him

[00:43:08] Like they just sort of like

[00:43:09] You know, would like corner him

[00:43:10] With a camera

[00:43:11] And he'd be like, huh?

[00:43:12] The most damning thing I can say

[00:43:13] About this movie

[00:43:14] Is that Emma Stone plays an Asian person

[00:43:15] The second most damning thing

[00:43:16] I can say about this movie

[00:43:18] Is this film has provided

[00:43:19] What I think is the only

[00:43:21] Bill Murray performance

[00:43:22] That just doesn't even register

[00:43:23] It's a waste of him

[00:43:24] But it's not even like

[00:43:25] I've seen him be worse

[00:43:26] In movies

[00:43:27] I mean, I didn't see like

[00:43:28] Rock the Casper

[00:43:29] I've seen Rock the Casper

[00:43:30] And how is it?

[00:43:31] It's not good

[00:43:32] I've seen him be worse

[00:43:33] In films

[00:43:34] Yeah, he can be bad

[00:43:35] But usually it's bad

[00:43:36] In a way that's kind of intriguing

[00:43:38] You know, he just doesn't

[00:43:40] I forget he's in this movie

[00:43:42] Yeah

[00:43:43] He's like vaporware

[00:43:44] But he dances and it's quirky

[00:43:45] He is

[00:43:46] Briefly quirky

[00:43:47] And can I give them two points?

[00:43:49] His look is great in this movie

[00:43:51] The look is fine if he did anything

[00:43:53] Yeah, no

[00:43:54] His performance just doesn't exist

[00:43:55] Much like

[00:43:56] Gangster Squad

[00:43:57] It's the Gangster Squad

[00:43:58] Of performances

[00:43:59] Was he in Gangster Squad?

[00:44:00] No

[00:44:01] But he embodies Gangster Squad

[00:44:02] As Carson Welle

[00:44:03] So

[00:44:04] His name's Gil Kress

[00:44:05] Bradley Cooper's character

[00:44:06] Brian Gil Kress

[00:44:07] Gil Kress

[00:44:08] So yes

[00:44:09] So he's in Hawaii

[00:44:11] To organize this gate blessing

[00:44:13] I guess

[00:44:14] He was stationed there for a while

[00:44:15] So he knows about Hawaii

[00:44:16] I guess that's why he's been sent there

[00:44:18] He's got history

[00:44:19] He also has roots in the form of

[00:44:21] An old flame

[00:44:22] Now you might also think

[00:44:24] Hey, a military contractor

[00:44:25] Has a lot of money

[00:44:26] They wanted to organize something in Hawaiian

[00:44:27] They might hire a Hawaiian guy

[00:44:29] No, they just hired a white guy who

[00:44:31] No, they hired a disgraced

[00:44:33] Military officer

[00:44:34] So he's in Hawaii

[00:44:36] Yes, he has an old

[00:44:37] Well, also he was blown up in Afghanistan

[00:44:38] I believe

[00:44:39] Yeah, he was blown up in Afghanistan

[00:44:40] And you know that because everyone tells him

[00:44:42] That he looks terrible

[00:44:43] And God, if I could only look that terrible

[00:44:45] On a daily basis

[00:44:46] Indeed

[00:44:47] He's got a limp

[00:44:48] But guess what?

[00:44:49] He's still Bradley Cooper

[00:44:50] He's got a weird toe

[00:44:52] He's got a weird toe

[00:44:53] Which we see later

[00:44:54] Spoiler alert, weird toe

[00:44:55] Yeah

[00:44:56] So he's in town for the gate blessing

[00:44:58] And yeah, he's got an old flame

[00:44:59] Rachel McAdams

[00:45:00] The great Rachel McAdams

[00:45:01] Another person who I think is a victim

[00:45:03] Of the thing we were talking about at the beginning of this film

[00:45:05] And now he's just got to the other side of it

[00:45:07] Where it's like, well it's too late

[00:45:09] Like now it's not gonna happen

[00:45:10] So she's just gonna have a good career

[00:45:12] Being a supporting actress

[00:45:13] I mean she was great in spotlight

[00:45:14] Yeah, she got an Oscar on it

[00:45:15] And she got an Oscar on her mission

[00:45:17] And I think she'll probably be great in other movies

[00:45:19] She's not in this

[00:45:20] But I think

[00:45:21] She's not bad in this

[00:45:22] I think she's now resigned to being a supporting actress

[00:45:24] I think she had to like fucking accept that

[00:45:26] Like the vehicles that would

[00:45:28] Have existed for her in the 90s

[00:45:31] Would have existed for her in the 70s

[00:45:32] And existed for her in the 30s

[00:45:33] Sure

[00:45:34] Aren't fucking happening

[00:45:35] And now you have four new women

[00:45:36] Who are waiting for those vehicles to happen

[00:45:38] And it's also not gonna happen for them

[00:45:39] That is true

[00:45:40] So McAdams

[00:45:42] Is his ex-girlfriend

[00:45:44] Who he broke up with when she went on vacation

[00:45:47] And he didn't join her

[00:45:48] She asked him to go on a vacation

[00:45:50] With him to talk about the status of their relationship

[00:45:52] Just what you wanted a vacation

[00:45:54] He says that is antithetical

[00:45:56] To what I want out of a vacation

[00:45:58] Sure, why not get a cup of coffee

[00:45:59] You know and then decide whether or not

[00:46:01] To go on vacation

[00:46:02] Right

[00:46:03] I

[00:46:04] Whatever

[00:46:05] Here's the thing

[00:46:06] The movie is trying to position him as an asshole

[00:46:07] It is, it fails

[00:46:08] He definitely

[00:46:09] Well I think he's not a likable guy in the movie

[00:46:11] But that situation

[00:46:13] I'm like yeah I hear you

[00:46:14] I wouldn't want to go on a vacation

[00:46:15] That's probably a breakup

[00:46:17] The way she positions it to him

[00:46:18] It's like hey do you want to go to a tropical location

[00:46:20] And then enact the plot of forgetting Sarah Marshall

[00:46:23] Right

[00:46:24] And he was like no I didn't like that

[00:46:25] I don't want to do that

[00:46:26] It's a 6.5 out of best

[00:46:27] Yeah

[00:46:28] Well okay so now she's married

[00:46:29] So another guy in the military

[00:46:31] Who flew Gilchrist into Hawaii

[00:46:33] And they have two kids

[00:46:34] So she's around

[00:46:35] Lieutenant John Krasinski

[00:46:37] That's his name

[00:46:38] Woody

[00:46:39] Woody

[00:46:40] And as he lands

[00:46:41] Having been flown in by

[00:46:42] Woody Krasinski

[00:46:44] As he lands on the fucking tarmac

[00:46:46] That is a weird choice that

[00:46:47] Rachel look at

[00:46:48] They decide to make Woody

[00:46:49] The brother of actor John Krasinski

[00:46:51] I know it's really weird

[00:46:52] But it's Canon

[00:46:53] It's Canon

[00:46:54] And he says his first line is

[00:46:55] My brother John was in the office

[00:46:57] He's like yeah I know

[00:46:58] You look just like it

[00:46:59] You look like John Krasinski from the office

[00:47:00] And licensed to wed

[00:47:02] Who made brief interviews with hideous men

[00:47:05] Directed that film

[00:47:06] Yeah yeah

[00:47:07] Who's married to Emily Blunt

[00:47:08] Yeah I know your brother

[00:47:09] He doesn't look in the camera though

[00:47:11] No

[00:47:12] He should have

[00:47:13] But that's the difference between

[00:47:14] John and Woody

[00:47:15] Do you know what I'm saying

[00:47:16] Yeah I guess

[00:47:17] John looks a man in the eyes

[00:47:18] No John looks a camera

[00:47:19] In the eyes of Woody

[00:47:20] Alright anyway

[00:47:21] Anyway

[00:47:22] So he lands on the tarmac

[00:47:24] John Krasinski flies him in there

[00:47:26] And one angle Rachel McAdams shows up

[00:47:28] And she's like

[00:47:29] God it's great to see you

[00:47:30] It's been 13 years

[00:47:31] We really need to talk about this

[00:47:32] Yeah it gives him a salute

[00:47:34] Esther for a Lister's at Home

[00:47:35] Esther is giving the sharpest salute

[00:47:37] Of all time

[00:47:38] And then fucking Emma Stone

[00:47:39] Buzzes in from the other angle

[00:47:41] And is like sir yes sir

[00:47:42] I'm here for you

[00:47:43] Like to organize this

[00:47:45] Gate blessing sunglasses

[00:47:46] Not a hair out of place

[00:47:47] She's Alice in Ang

[00:47:48] Oh boy

[00:47:49] It's like ring but without

[00:47:50] The R or the I

[00:47:51] It's like I don't know

[00:47:52] If maybe he was told to cut things down

[00:47:53] But it's just trying to throw

[00:47:55] Everything on the plate right away

[00:47:57] I think there was probably 15 minutes

[00:47:59] Cut out of this movie

[00:48:00] And he's like barking every

[00:48:01] He's like

[00:48:02] He like moves the camera

[00:48:03] He circles the camera around

[00:48:04] Okay I like that

[00:48:05] You like that

[00:48:06] I like that

[00:48:07] Shot by Eric Gaultier

[00:48:08] Who shot the motorcycle diaries

[00:48:10] And other good movies

[00:48:12] I do think there's some interesting

[00:48:14] Visual stuff going on in this movie

[00:48:16] But it goes away

[00:48:17] It goes away

[00:48:18] The beginning is a lot more

[00:48:19] Interesting than the rest of it

[00:48:20] I would say that's true

[00:48:21] Yeah it does

[00:48:22] It is initially kind of

[00:48:23] Visually interesting

[00:48:24] But it ends with

[00:48:25] The same opening Cameron Crow has used

[00:48:27] In four of his last five films

[00:48:29] Where there's voiceover

[00:48:30] And like a photo montage

[00:48:31] Of different like stock footage

[00:48:33] And photographs of the characters

[00:48:35] Explaining the background

[00:48:36] End of view from space

[00:48:37] Which he also uses in Jerry Maguire

[00:48:39] The whole movie is about this guy

[00:48:41] It's about this guy

[00:48:42] The movie is not about anything

[00:48:43] It's about this guy

[00:48:44] So the movie

[00:48:45] Good job guys

[00:48:46] I'm gonna fight this

[00:48:47] You can say whatever you want

[00:48:49] About Aloha

[00:48:50] About it being shitty

[00:48:51] And I will support you in that

[00:48:52] But the movie is about something

[00:48:53] It's about the sky.

[00:48:55] And who owns it?

[00:48:57] David, who owns the sky?

[00:48:58] Nobody owns the sky.

[00:48:59] Thanks to a space treaty signed in the 1960s,

[00:49:04] the sky is free from military interference.

[00:49:08] Nobody can claim it, right?

[00:49:09] Yeah.

[00:49:10] So that's one plot element.

[00:49:12] The militarization of space.

[00:49:15] Yeah.

[00:49:16] And then another plot element is getting this gate blessing ready.

[00:49:19] Gotta get that gate blessing.

[00:49:20] Then plot element three is will he fuck stone?

[00:49:24] And plot element four is will he fuck McAdams?

[00:49:26] Probably not, but they definitely need to chat.

[00:49:28] See I feel like there's no...

[00:49:30] For me watching the film, because the way the trailer was cut together...

[00:49:33] We gotta say that there's no plot, because that's kind of accurate.

[00:49:36] There's a lot of plots about this guy.

[00:49:38] The...

[00:49:39] A sky plot!

[00:49:40] I think this movie has too much plot.

[00:49:41] Sky Nat?

[00:49:42] That's what I'm saying.

[00:49:43] It sort of throws a lot out there and then it doesn't know what to do.

[00:49:46] Yeah.

[00:49:47] You could get something like Jerry Maguire, which has a lot of things going on in it,

[00:49:50] but all of them come down to a basic theme.

[00:49:53] You know what I'm saying?

[00:49:54] You could, in essence, sum Jerry Maguire up in one sentence,

[00:49:57] and you wouldn't perfectly describe every element of the film,

[00:50:00] but you would describe common threads that connect them all.

[00:50:03] You can do that for a lot of his movies.

[00:50:04] This film has a lot of disparate elements.

[00:50:06] Yes.

[00:50:07] And you just imagine that he spent 10 plus years...

[00:50:09] Esther just mouthed the sky to me.

[00:50:12] Esther.

[00:50:13] He spent 10 years trying to find the...

[00:50:16] Let me mouth something to Esther.

[00:50:21] I mouthed Esther 5 million comedy points.

[00:50:23] Great.

[00:50:24] Um, I think...

[00:50:26] It's just...

[00:50:27] It feels like he read like three Vanity Fair articles, you know?

[00:50:30] He read like one about the militarization of space

[00:50:32] and he read one about like guys getting blown up in Afghanistan.

[00:50:36] He read one about, you know, Hawaiian gate blessing.

[00:50:38] But this is what's fascinating about this.

[00:50:39] He was like, oh, this is all gonna work together.

[00:50:41] This is great.

[00:50:42] What's fascinating about that?

[00:50:43] The sky!

[00:50:44] He wrote this film over the fucking course of 10 years.

[00:50:46] Yeah, he kept revising it.

[00:50:47] It was called Deep Tiki and there was a big deep Tiki scene in it.

[00:50:51] If this movie came out and they were like,

[00:50:53] he wrote the script in six weeks...

[00:50:55] It sounds... Deep Tiki sounds gross.

[00:50:57] Deep Tiki sounds like a porn.

[00:50:58] Do you think the porn version of this is called Deep Tiki

[00:51:01] and like a cute little nod to cinephiles?

[00:51:03] Yes, yes it is.

[00:51:04] And Peter Labouza's the only one who liked it.

[00:51:07] Shout out Peter Labouza!

[00:51:09] Yeah.

[00:51:10] Love ya, Pete.

[00:51:12] I feel like if you had told me he wrote the script,

[00:51:17] you know sometimes filmmakers are like,

[00:51:18] the movie just came to me and I wrote it in two weeks.

[00:51:20] Sure, I wrote it in six weeks.

[00:51:21] Yeah, right.

[00:51:22] And I brought it in, they bought it.

[00:51:23] If you had told me that that had happened

[00:51:25] straight off of almost famous or drama choir

[00:51:27] and this was the movie we got,

[00:51:28] I'd be like, I understand how this movie turned out this way.

[00:51:31] But to be like for 10 years,

[00:51:33] he wouldn't give up on this script

[00:51:35] and clearly rewrote it, you know?

[00:51:37] Probably rewrote it, yeah.

[00:51:38] Because we like fucking lost the computer and stuff.

[00:51:41] And you know, the big thing that came out of the Sony hack

[00:51:46] was Amy Pascal seeing the movie for the first time

[00:51:51] and complaining going like,

[00:51:53] this is the last time we ever green light a movie

[00:51:55] with a script that doesn't make sense.

[00:51:57] It doesn't matter how much we love Cameron.

[00:51:59] It doesn't matter how much we love the actors.

[00:52:01] Can I read her actual remarks?

[00:52:02] Please.

[00:52:03] Okay, so here's an email she sent after test screenings

[00:52:07] had gone on in Huntington Beach in New York.

[00:52:09] I love the way she writes emails, by the way.

[00:52:11] I know, it's just weird like haiku with these line breaks.

[00:52:14] Her emails are incredible.

[00:52:15] It's an invasion of privacy, but it's also great.

[00:52:17] I know, we should note that, yeah, whatever.

[00:52:19] Scores same as last time and way, way worse in NY.

[00:52:22] Referring to test screenings

[00:52:24] and the scores they get from the no cards they hand out to people.

[00:52:26] It's a wrap.

[00:52:27] There is no more to do.

[00:52:28] Cameron never really changed anything.

[00:52:30] People don't like people in movies who flirt with married people

[00:52:33] or married people who flirt.

[00:52:34] Which, as a line, is quite something.

[00:52:37] I don't know if that's true.

[00:52:38] I feel like there must be examples that contravene them.

[00:52:40] Yes, and I have a lot to say on that subject, but let's go on.

[00:52:42] The satellite makes no sense.

[00:52:44] Fair.

[00:52:45] Right about that, Amy.

[00:52:46] The gate makes no sense.

[00:52:47] Indeed.

[00:52:48] Fair.

[00:52:49] I'm never starting a movie again where the script is ridiculous

[00:52:51] and we know it.

[00:52:52] We all know it.

[00:52:53] We all know it.

[00:52:54] We all know it actually.

[00:52:55] Yeah.

[00:52:56] I don't care how much I love the director and the actors.

[00:52:58] It never line break.

[00:53:00] Not even once line break ever works.

[00:53:03] As much as I want movies,

[00:53:05] this is way worse, at least the marketing part.

[00:53:09] Then she's complaining about Scott Rudin who produced the movie

[00:53:12] for not helping edit it, not helping turn things around.

[00:53:15] Scott Rudin notoriously likes to...

[00:53:17] He protects the director.

[00:53:19] He creates an igloo around the director, let them do what they want.

[00:53:21] She was sort of complaining, I think, that he created that igloo

[00:53:24] and then when the chips were down and the film was in trouble,

[00:53:27] he didn't do anything to help it.

[00:53:28] Right.

[00:53:29] He should have probably recognized like this movie's not going to work.

[00:53:31] Especially if he had prevented her from intervening creatively.

[00:53:35] Yeah.

[00:53:36] And the line like he didn't make...

[00:53:38] He didn't change anything is like, well clearly they were trying to get him to change stuff.

[00:53:41] But it does speak to like, I mean this is such an ultimate blank check movie

[00:53:44] because they were like, the script doesn't make sense to us

[00:53:46] but maybe we just don't get it.

[00:53:48] Yeah.

[00:53:49] Let's give him the money and assume that he gets it better than we did.

[00:53:51] Which makes sense if it's Elizabeth Towne time.

[00:53:54] Yes.

[00:53:55] But you would think by now they would be on their guard.

[00:53:57] I guess this script had been floating around basically that whole time anyway.

[00:54:00] I mean if you could attach these actors to...

[00:54:02] I mean that's what she's saying.

[00:54:03] These actors are big but they're not like, you know...

[00:54:06] At that point in time, I think it was a good idea to bet on a Bradley Cooper

[00:54:11] Emma Stone or band of comedy because they look like the next two people

[00:54:13] who are going to rise to the surface.

[00:54:15] In a lot of ways it looks like a safe bet.

[00:54:17] Yes.

[00:54:18] But in a lot of ways it's a movie in Hawaii starring a bunch of white people.

[00:54:20] And stacked with a supporting cast like that.

[00:54:22] Yeah.

[00:54:23] Yes.

[00:54:24] And it's about the militarization of space.

[00:54:25] Which is...

[00:54:26] It's about the sky.

[00:54:27] It's about the sky David.

[00:54:28] Please stop being glib.

[00:54:29] Wait, it's glib to say militarization of space?

[00:54:32] Yeah that's fucking glib.

[00:54:33] It's about the sky.

[00:54:35] It's about one thing and that's the sky.

[00:54:37] One thing and that's the sky.

[00:54:39] Anyway...

[00:54:40] I think that...

[00:54:44] It's weird because I'm always someone, not always someone,

[00:54:47] but someone who will most usually come down on the side of like

[00:54:50] let filmmakers make what they want to make.

[00:54:52] You know, like fucking Suicide Squad we discussed a couple weeks ago

[00:54:55] which is like...

[00:54:56] I don't know if I would have like David Ayers' vision of the film

[00:54:58] but I hate watching the movie that is cobbled together from 20 different visions

[00:55:02] including a trailer company.

[00:55:03] Right.

[00:55:04] Like I'd rather watch the cohesive, coherent film that he wanted to make

[00:55:07] even if I hated it.

[00:55:08] Oh god, if you hear about what they cut out of that movie though.

[00:55:09] Yeah.

[00:55:10] Oh boy.

[00:55:11] But I would have preferred that movie.

[00:55:13] I guess so.

[00:55:14] Because it would have been...

[00:55:15] I know what you're saying.

[00:55:16] A movie.

[00:55:17] Do you know what I'm saying?

[00:55:18] And I feel like this is a case where it's like

[00:55:22] you wish that the Czech hadn't been blank.

[00:55:25] You wish they had reigned him in.

[00:55:26] He needs help.

[00:55:27] He needs help.

[00:55:28] I mean, I don't know.

[00:55:29] I'm a firm believer.

[00:55:30] I believe in...

[00:55:31] This guy?

[00:55:32] I believe in this guy.

[00:55:34] I do really believe in this guy.

[00:55:35] But I also believe in editors.

[00:55:37] And I believe...

[00:55:38] I mean and not just in film editors.

[00:55:40] I believe in like people sitting and going through your work

[00:55:43] and being like, oh okay.

[00:55:45] And pushing back.

[00:55:46] Step back.

[00:55:47] Yeah.

[00:55:48] And clearly just no one was doing that.

[00:55:49] At least until it was too late.

[00:55:51] Yes.

[00:55:52] That is true.

[00:55:53] A movie does feel harshly edited in that it's not very long.

[00:55:57] It's about an hour and 40 minutes.

[00:55:59] And doesn't make any goddamn sense.

[00:56:01] So definitely something happened there.

[00:56:03] But I don't know if it was Cameron Crow just kind of trying to

[00:56:05] like vainly tie things together.

[00:56:07] It feels like there's things missing.

[00:56:09] There's a lot missing from this movie.

[00:56:11] Because I basically...

[00:56:12] I just described the setup of the movie which is like

[00:56:14] guy arrives on Hawaii and there's a bunch of stuff he has to deal with.

[00:56:17] He has to deal with gate blessing.

[00:56:18] He has to deal with Bill Murray.

[00:56:19] He has to deal with Emma Stone.

[00:56:21] But they're all kind of separate things.

[00:56:23] Yeah.

[00:56:24] And they send him like...

[00:56:26] Well then the movie is like he deals with this for 20 minutes.

[00:56:29] And then he goes and he deals with this.

[00:56:31] They're not really that connected.

[00:56:33] Yes.

[00:56:34] But it's also...

[00:56:35] I mean the crux of the movie is the idea that like Carson Walsh wants to put

[00:56:38] this satellite in the sky.

[00:56:40] Yes, the billionaire.

[00:56:41] No one can own the sky.

[00:56:42] But Hawaiian culture especially really values the sky

[00:56:46] and has this mythic power to them.

[00:56:48] And they need someone to mediate between the sort of Hawaiian, you know...

[00:56:58] Elders?

[00:56:59] I mean I...

[00:57:00] Well it's between...

[00:57:01] Bumpy is the king.

[00:57:02] Bumpy kind of...

[00:57:03] They say?

[00:57:04] Yeah.

[00:57:05] Kind of Healy who is like he's the leader of a group called the Nation of Hawaii

[00:57:07] which is like a sort of like...

[00:57:09] Just not explained.

[00:57:10] Yes.

[00:57:11] It's not explained.

[00:57:12] Sort of like a Hawaiian independence movement that is sort of quasi-recognized

[00:57:16] by international law is like something that needs to be...

[00:57:20] Sort of in the same way that we...

[00:57:21] That's interesting.

[00:57:22] I'd like to see a movie about that.

[00:57:23] Interesting, right?

[00:57:24] Sort of in the same way we have Native American.

[00:57:26] And I'm sure I'm botching this because I'm just mostly off the top of my head.

[00:57:29] But like I can probably read more about it.

[00:57:31] They're trying to get their blessing.

[00:57:33] They're trying to get their blessing and so Gilchrist is like

[00:57:36] we'll give you two mountains and sell phone service.

[00:57:39] Now the audience has no idea what that means.

[00:57:42] No.

[00:57:43] And there's also some part...

[00:57:44] They're trying to explain the fucking gate at this point.

[00:57:46] No, no, they haven't explained anything.

[00:57:47] We don't know what the gate is.

[00:57:48] I don't think we ever know.

[00:57:49] There's one line at the end of the film.

[00:57:51] There's one newscaster at the end of the film

[00:57:54] who's when they're blessing the gate as well

[00:57:56] that's talking about that they're building some sort of...

[00:57:59] They're building some sort of...

[00:58:02] I'm forgetting actually what they're building honestly.

[00:58:04] I failed.

[00:58:05] I caught a line it was earlier in the film.

[00:58:07] Okay.

[00:58:08] There's one line where I think Baldwin is yelling at him

[00:58:12] about fucking blowing up the satellite.

[00:58:14] Yeah, it's about two thirds of the way through the movie.

[00:58:16] Yeah, and he says like this military gate

[00:58:19] and he like makes it clear quickly that it would be

[00:58:21] like an air force gate, like a landing gate

[00:58:24] and a base essentially.

[00:58:25] Right, right, that's what...

[00:58:26] Yeah, that's...

[00:58:27] And that's why I think what the newscaster says

[00:58:29] something along those lines

[00:58:30] that there's gonna be some sort of facility

[00:58:32] that Kersen Welch is building as well.

[00:58:39] I don't know.

[00:58:40] When you talk about Gate...

[00:58:41] I don't know if I'm just like an idiot,

[00:58:42] but when you talk about Gate that much

[00:58:44] in a film that's so much about like Hawaiian spirituality,

[00:58:47] I'm like is it a gate to like the other side?

[00:58:50] Like what is it like a monument of a thing?

[00:58:52] Is it like an actual practical thing?

[00:58:54] Is it like what is it?

[00:58:55] You know?

[00:58:56] And I kept googling like pedestrian gate blessing

[00:58:59] and pedestrian gate blessing Hawaii

[00:59:02] and the only thing that comes up is this movie.

[00:59:04] Right, it's not...

[00:59:05] The problem is that this movie has ruined any info

[00:59:07] you can find out about this stuff

[00:59:09] and it's just article after article that's like,

[00:59:11] Emma Stone, like what is she doing in this movie

[00:59:14] or whatever, you know?

[00:59:15] I don't think like a Hawaiian gate blessing

[00:59:18] is like a tradition.

[00:59:19] I think that he wanted to make a film

[00:59:21] about the US military and private contractors

[00:59:24] trying to build something new in Hawaii

[00:59:26] and looking for the approval of the locals

[00:59:29] and in the process, words it in a way

[00:59:33] that makes it feel like there's something

[00:59:34] you're not getting.

[00:59:35] If he had gone new military base

[00:59:37] we want your blessing on new military base.

[00:59:38] This movie would be 20% easier to follow.

[00:59:41] The other thing is, but that's...

[00:59:43] So there's like you said, maybe you would be interested

[00:59:45] to see a movie about the nation of Hawaii

[00:59:48] and like Hawaiian independence.

[00:59:49] That would be very interesting.

[00:59:50] And like the natives of Hawaii and how they...

[00:59:52] You know, that's maybe you're interested

[00:59:54] in seeing a movie about how the military

[00:59:56] has to contract more and more things out

[00:59:58] and is more in the hands of like wacky billionaires

[01:00:00] like Bill Murray's character

[01:00:02] and like that weird tension.

[01:00:04] I mean, look, it's not the most fascinating movie

[01:00:06] I ever like heard of, but whatever.

[01:00:08] I don't like you stereotyping me as someone

[01:00:09] who wants to see that movie,

[01:00:10] but sure, I'll accept it.

[01:00:11] I'll accept the title.

[01:00:13] For the purpose of what you're doing.

[01:00:14] For the purpose of what you're doing, fine.

[01:00:15] I think it's a little productive.

[01:00:16] I like to think of myself as more than that.

[01:00:18] I'm a human being with many facets.

[01:00:19] And maybe like in either of those movies

[01:00:22] you can have as well like a rom-com

[01:00:24] subplot or something.

[01:00:25] See, that's probably the movie I want to see the most.

[01:00:27] Well, right.

[01:00:28] It's just Kamikro doing like a straight down the middle

[01:00:30] love story.

[01:00:31] But the love story in this is not enough

[01:00:33] like on its own.

[01:00:34] He definitely needs to embellish on it

[01:00:35] in some way.

[01:00:36] The love story I want to talk about as well.

[01:00:38] Because...

[01:00:39] Yeah, we should talk about it.

[01:00:40] Because Emma Stone is...

[01:00:43] has a hard time being sexy.

[01:00:46] Yeah, it does.

[01:00:47] Because she is a fighter pilot.

[01:00:48] And she says,

[01:00:49] how do you make I'm a fighter pilot sound sexy?

[01:00:52] Right.

[01:00:53] Which is baffling to me.

[01:00:55] Because her entire movies about how male

[01:00:57] fighter pilots are very sexy.

[01:01:00] The motion picture top gun.

[01:01:01] Top gun.

[01:01:02] Which is about almost nothing else.

[01:01:04] Exactly.

[01:01:05] It's called,

[01:01:06] look at the sexy fighter pilot, the movie.

[01:01:08] And they changed it.

[01:01:09] Fire pilot.

[01:01:10] Fire pilot.

[01:01:11] This guy.

[01:01:12] Yeah.

[01:01:13] Fire pilot, Vera Whitt.

[01:01:14] But when Emma Stone says it,

[01:01:15] because she's a girl,

[01:01:17] she's not...

[01:01:18] She can't be sexy.

[01:01:20] And so she's a sad alone person.

[01:01:22] Well, right.

[01:01:23] And...

[01:01:24] But who creepily has an interest in

[01:01:26] Brian Gilcrest from

[01:01:28] before she even meets him.

[01:01:30] Right, she knows his life story.

[01:01:32] But also she's playing someone with a stick

[01:01:34] up her ass and that's like...

[01:01:36] For half of the movie.

[01:01:37] It's a Dr. Gilcrest or Hyde thing.

[01:01:39] It's not even half.

[01:01:40] 20 minutes.

[01:01:41] When she's wearing the uniform,

[01:01:42] she's straight up and then she lets her hair down

[01:01:43] in the next scene,

[01:01:44] she's like,

[01:01:45] a vacous.

[01:01:46] But Esther,

[01:01:47] I need to ask you this, okay?

[01:01:48] Okay, okay.

[01:01:49] What young,

[01:01:51] beautiful,

[01:01:52] intelligent

[01:01:54] woman with a...

[01:01:56] At the beginning of a promising career,

[01:01:58] full of potential,

[01:01:59] wouldn't unconditionally be attracted to

[01:02:01] every fucking shit show of a man she met.

[01:02:04] Because what she wants to do most in her life

[01:02:06] is fix a broken man

[01:02:07] who she thinks could be great.

[01:02:09] Why wouldn't she?

[01:02:11] Why wouldn't she fall for him?

[01:02:12] You know, it's the ultimate question.

[01:02:14] He's got a weird toe.

[01:02:15] He does have a weird toe.

[01:02:16] He does have a weird toe.

[01:02:17] Alright, so we talked about Elizabeth Town

[01:02:18] a couple weeks ago.

[01:02:19] Yes.

[01:02:20] And obviously,

[01:02:21] and Kiki Dunst is the manic pixie dream girl.

[01:02:23] And then in We Bought a Zoo,

[01:02:24] there's a manic pixie dream zoo

[01:02:26] that fixes his life for him.

[01:02:28] Yeah, I like that already.

[01:02:29] And then there's a manic pixie dream country,

[01:02:31] essentially, or culture.

[01:02:32] Like the manic pixie dream Hawaiian culture

[01:02:34] repairs everything for him.

[01:02:36] But there is a very...

[01:02:37] Manic pixie dream sky.

[01:02:38] Yes.

[01:02:39] I think the dynamic between Emma Stone

[01:02:42] and Kiersten Dunst

[01:02:44] and Bradley Cooper in this film

[01:02:46] is very similar to the dynamic

[01:02:47] between Orlando Bloom and Kiersten Dunst.

[01:02:49] In both cases, it's like,

[01:02:50] here's a guy who's fucking miserable

[01:02:51] and he's a mess

[01:02:52] and he keeps on going like

[01:02:53] get the fuck away from me,

[01:02:54] largely for the first part of the movie.

[01:02:56] I'll say at least...

[01:02:57] And she's like, you know what?

[01:02:58] That's what I'm looking for in a man.

[01:02:59] I'm gonna commit all of my time and energy

[01:03:01] to fixing him.

[01:03:02] But the thing is...

[01:03:03] So when I just met...

[01:03:04] I mean, I'll say at least...

[01:03:05] I mean, Bloom and Elizabeth Down,

[01:03:07] we talked about it, you know.

[01:03:08] There's no character there.

[01:03:09] There's no performance.

[01:03:10] At least Cooper is...

[01:03:11] He's got a little bit of an edge to him.

[01:03:13] He's alright.

[01:03:14] Cooper gives a functional performance

[01:03:16] in this movie.

[01:03:17] Yeah, he's fine.

[01:03:18] I mean, he's fine.

[01:03:19] I think Cooper can be

[01:03:20] quite a good actor.

[01:03:21] Yeah, he can be great at it.

[01:03:22] Not in this, but he's alright.

[01:03:23] He's not trying,

[01:03:24] but he like has enough mojo

[01:03:26] or whatever to like sustain it.

[01:03:28] Yeah, he doesn't seem broken down enough.

[01:03:31] And the only way he does seem broken down

[01:03:33] is that he like barks at everybody.

[01:03:35] And you're like...

[01:03:36] He literally barks also

[01:03:37] at one point in the movie.

[01:03:38] He literally barks like a dog.

[01:03:39] Pretty early on when they're driving

[01:03:41] in the car,

[01:03:42] she's like, so what's your deal?

[01:03:43] And he just starts barking at her

[01:03:44] and then rolls down the window

[01:03:45] and howls at the sky.

[01:03:47] I don't know if he feels...

[01:03:48] Yes.

[01:03:49] Cameron Crowe thinks that's a great idea.

[01:03:51] Yeah, and 15 County points to Cameron Crowe.

[01:03:53] I don't know.

[01:03:54] Take him back!

[01:03:55] I don't know if he feels broken enough,

[01:04:00] but I do think Cooper does play the defensive,

[01:04:03] like guarded asshole element of it.

[01:04:06] Which feels like a side effect of it,

[01:04:08] which is much more than Orlando Bloom did,

[01:04:10] which was nothing.

[01:04:11] And also Bradley Cooper doesn't sound

[01:04:13] like a fucking cartoon tugboat in this movie.

[01:04:15] Yes.

[01:04:16] You know?

[01:04:17] That was a good call about Bloom.

[01:04:18] Thank you.

[01:04:20] I just need to get to Elizabeth Town.

[01:04:24] I mean, Elizabeth Town is a much worse movie

[01:04:26] than Aloha.

[01:04:27] No question.

[01:04:28] Yes, there's no doubt about that.

[01:04:29] Because before this rewatch,

[01:04:31] I was like, pfft, gonna be tight.

[01:04:33] Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[01:04:35] And I watch this now and I'm like,

[01:04:36] this is much better.

[01:04:37] Here's the difference.

[01:04:38] It's not good.

[01:04:39] In the parlance...

[01:04:40] It's like half a star versus one star.

[01:04:41] In the parlance of Elizabeth Town,

[01:04:43] I will say this movie is a failure

[01:04:44] more than a fiasco.

[01:04:45] And I will also...

[01:04:47] I think this movie is a fiasco.

[01:04:48] I thought it was a fiasco at first.

[01:04:49] My new on my second viewing,

[01:04:50] I think it's not a failure.

[01:04:51] No, I think the race...

[01:04:52] There's also the thing with Aloha though,

[01:04:54] is that like, and I've gotten to an argument

[01:04:55] about this recently,

[01:04:56] not an argument, just like a discussion,

[01:04:58] that like the offensive parts of Aloha

[01:05:02] are so offensive that it's like...

[01:05:04] Agreed.

[01:05:05] I don't know...

[01:05:06] Yes.

[01:05:07] I don't know if you can totally evaluate it

[01:05:10] like...

[01:05:11] As a movie.

[01:05:12] As a movie.

[01:05:13] Yes.

[01:05:14] In like, knowing that.

[01:05:16] But also the movie's plot is weird.

[01:05:18] It's weird.

[01:05:19] They go on the...

[01:05:20] They go to make the deal with the Hawaiian guy.

[01:05:22] When they're coming back,

[01:05:23] they see a procession of like, ghosts maybe.

[01:05:26] Right?

[01:05:27] Yeah.

[01:05:28] Right?

[01:05:29] Yeah.

[01:05:30] And they have to look at their feet

[01:05:31] while the ghosts are going by.

[01:05:32] Then they go back to the hotel room.

[01:05:34] Do they bone then or do they bone later?

[01:05:36] No, they bone after the party.

[01:05:37] They bone after the party.

[01:05:38] They go back to their hotel room.

[01:05:39] She asked him for drinks and he's like,

[01:05:41] no way, fuck you,

[01:05:42] why would I sleep with Emma Stone?

[01:05:44] 14 years my junior.

[01:05:46] Emma Stone.

[01:05:47] That's the other thing.

[01:05:48] Fuck him.

[01:05:49] When are these women going to get to do films

[01:05:51] where they play anyone within 10 years of their own age?

[01:05:54] Fuckin' Stone and like...

[01:05:56] Outside of the franchises.

[01:05:57] And Lawrence just don't get to fucking do it.

[01:05:59] It drives me insane.

[01:06:00] Well, Lawrence is always playing older than...

[01:06:01] And that's just...

[01:06:02] Or younger.

[01:06:03] She never plays her own age.

[01:06:04] She's into playing a teenager

[01:06:06] in X-Men first class.

[01:06:08] Oh, I guess...

[01:06:09] In younger and hungier games.

[01:06:10] She's younger and hungier games.

[01:06:11] That's true.

[01:06:12] She either plays like 18.

[01:06:14] Or like 42.

[01:06:15] Yeah.

[01:06:16] Let her play someone who is 26.

[01:06:18] You know the age she is?

[01:06:20] I mean, Joy was where it really...

[01:06:22] Earth is happening.

[01:06:23] I can't deal with it anymore.

[01:06:25] So...

[01:06:27] So then he goes over to Rachel McAdams' house.

[01:06:30] And we've talked about show don't tell

[01:06:32] or whatever a million times.

[01:06:34] He shows up and she's like,

[01:06:35] I really just wanted to talk to you

[01:06:37] about the time 13 years ago

[01:06:38] that I asked you to go on vacation with me in San Francisco

[01:06:40] and I was in San Francisco

[01:06:41] and you didn't show up.

[01:06:42] And he's like, well, the reason for that

[01:06:43] is that you had told me

[01:06:44] that if we went there

[01:06:45] we were going to talk about...

[01:06:46] You know, they just like explain...

[01:06:48] There's also this weird thing where she's like...

[01:06:50] Where she's like,

[01:06:51] I'm gonna...

[01:06:52] You're gonna be my girlfriend right now.

[01:06:54] Like you're gonna be my girlfriend.

[01:06:55] I'm gonna talk to you like my girlfriend.

[01:06:57] Yeah.

[01:06:58] And like...

[01:06:59] They're going for it, I'll say.

[01:07:00] Those two actors in that scene.

[01:07:02] Like they're trying to pep up that weird dialogue.

[01:07:05] But here's the thing I find interesting.

[01:07:07] Not about the movie itself

[01:07:08] but about how it was positioned

[01:07:10] and everything.

[01:07:11] That Amy Pascal email focuses on

[01:07:14] people don't want to see movies about

[01:07:16] people flirting with married people.

[01:07:18] And the trailer for the movie very much played up

[01:07:20] that it was like a love triangle.

[01:07:22] The angle with it.

[01:07:23] And the poster.

[01:07:24] Yeah.

[01:07:25] It was literally a triangle.

[01:07:26] Yes.

[01:07:27] The posters literally grabbed the Cooper and tried.

[01:07:28] It's a bunch of isosceles triangles dividing them.

[01:07:30] But that very much positioned the film as being...

[01:07:32] Like they didn't mention

[01:07:33] any of the fucking satellite stuff in the trailer.

[01:07:35] How are you supposed to mention it?

[01:07:36] Right, how?

[01:07:37] Right, the trailer reduced the movie to...

[01:07:39] Military guy goes to Hawaii.

[01:07:41] Ex-girlfriend, new girlfriend?

[01:07:43] Which one?

[01:07:44] Right.

[01:07:45] Sometimes you have to say...

[01:07:46] Oh, okay.

[01:07:47] The tagline for the trip.

[01:07:49] I don't think there's a single moment of this film

[01:07:51] and maybe it's just my viewing.

[01:07:53] I don't think there's a single moment of this film

[01:07:56] where I feel any tension about whether

[01:07:58] Bradley Cooper and Rich McCombs are getting back together.

[01:08:00] No, absolutely not.

[01:08:01] But I'm not saying I think the film is trying that

[01:08:03] and fails.

[01:08:04] I don't think the film is trying to make you

[01:08:05] think he's going to get back together with her.

[01:08:07] No.

[01:08:08] I think he's trying to come to terms with what happened

[01:08:09] but he knows that door is closed.

[01:08:11] No, you never think it's going to happen.

[01:08:13] I mean, I guess you're supposed to think that

[01:08:15] like, Woody Krasinski feels threatened by...

[01:08:20] Thank you.

[01:08:21] Because he's able to talk about the film.

[01:08:22] Yeah, and he's not able to talk at all.

[01:08:25] Right.

[01:08:26] Which is another part of the movie.

[01:08:27] That's a thing he doesn't like talking.

[01:08:29] He doesn't like to talk.

[01:08:30] He doesn't like to talk.

[01:08:31] He doesn't like to talk.

[01:08:32] There's an early scene in the scene we're just talking

[01:08:34] about where they're having this San Francisco

[01:08:38] 13 years ago fight and then he comes in

[01:08:40] and he kind of like pats him on the shoulder

[01:08:43] and like nods and like picks up a beer

[01:08:45] and he like looks again and then he walks out

[01:08:47] and she's like, see he didn't say anything

[01:08:49] and Bradley was like, he said a lot.

[01:08:51] Like that touch on my shoulder means this.

[01:08:53] Bro code.

[01:08:54] Bro code bro.

[01:08:55] Now, like so many things in the movie

[01:08:57] it feels like something Cameron Crow is like,

[01:08:59] oh, this is a great idea I have.

[01:09:01] Right?

[01:09:02] Like this is going to be great.

[01:09:03] What if I had a character who basically

[01:09:05] never spoke at all?

[01:09:06] One problem, John Krasinski has like five

[01:09:08] of the first six lines in the movie.

[01:09:10] So it suddenly is weird where it's like,

[01:09:12] oh you know how he doesn't talk and I'm like,

[01:09:13] wasn't he just like, now we're landing Bradley Cooper.

[01:09:16] Nice to see you by the way.

[01:09:17] You were in Afghanistan, right?

[01:09:19] This is the airport like gate blessing, huh?

[01:09:22] I did think it was maybe supposed to be

[01:09:24] that like he doesn't talk to her.

[01:09:26] Well that doesn't seem very good.

[01:09:27] No, not a great marriage.

[01:09:29] They should, and then then-

[01:09:30] But that's the problem, they're having

[01:09:31] troubles with her marriage.

[01:09:32] Right, so she's like, I'm going to leave you

[01:09:34] and he's like, what are you,

[01:09:36] like it's just because of him and she's like,

[01:09:38] well we've had trouble already.

[01:09:39] Does the audience care about this at all?

[01:09:41] How could they ever be on his side?

[01:09:43] On whose side?

[01:09:44] Woody Krasinski.

[01:09:46] He was playing himself.

[01:09:47] Yes.

[01:09:48] Woody Krasinski is a real person I've decided.

[01:09:50] Yes.

[01:09:51] He's the Don McCall, one of the five guys.

[01:09:53] Don Krasinski is not in this film.

[01:09:54] Yeah.

[01:09:55] For me, I mean A, you know,

[01:09:59] I mean this is not about the film itself,

[01:10:02] but I find it fascinating that that's what

[01:10:04] Amy Pascal responds so strongly to

[01:10:06] and then chose to focus the marketing on that angle.

[01:10:10] Right.

[01:10:11] Like that email was from six months before

[01:10:13] the movie came out.

[01:10:14] Yeah.

[01:10:15] And they proceeded selling it that way

[01:10:16] when I don't think that's what the movie is about.

[01:10:18] Not really.

[01:10:19] And when you say, David, maybe you want to see a movie

[01:10:20] about this, maybe you want to see a movie about this

[01:10:21] to explain how many different things the movie

[01:10:23] is trying to be about some day.

[01:10:24] I said that you wanted to see,

[01:10:25] you griffin' a movie about the militarization of space.

[01:10:27] I know, but can I tell you which movie

[01:10:29] watching this film in all the various pieces

[01:10:31] is throwing out that I want to see the most?

[01:10:33] The one I want to see the most is

[01:10:36] Guy gets a job in the town of his ex-flame

[01:10:40] and comes to term with it.

[01:10:42] You know, not maybe getting into a new relationship with it.

[01:10:45] I mean that's a movie we've seen before,

[01:10:47] but you could do it well.

[01:10:48] I think Cameron Crowe could make a good movie about that.

[01:10:49] Yeah.

[01:10:50] Cameron Crowe at the peak of his powers could do it.

[01:10:51] Yeah.

[01:10:52] And then also the element of the film

[01:10:53] that I find the most emotionally investing,

[01:10:54] although it's the one that is sort of thrown off the most,

[01:10:57] but I think leads to the best scene in the movie

[01:10:59] is the daughter thing.

[01:11:00] And the best scene in the movie is the Hula scene?

[01:11:02] Yeah, I think the ending is the one scene in the movie

[01:11:04] where I'm like that's Cameron Crowe.

[01:11:06] That feels like you're doing your thing.

[01:11:08] That girl is crazy.

[01:11:09] The daughter scene?

[01:11:10] That scene is terrific.

[01:11:11] I mean it's unfortunate that the movie struggles

[01:11:14] to earn it obviously, but it's a good scene.

[01:11:16] Why I want that to be the movie?

[01:11:18] Of course, of course.

[01:11:19] It feels like that's the most human thing

[01:11:20] that he's grappled onto.

[01:11:21] Immediately when you see the movie,

[01:11:23] and she says like 13 years ago,

[01:11:25] anyone who's paying half of attention is like,

[01:11:28] oh that girl, he might be that girl's father.

[01:11:30] He just introduced her.

[01:11:31] She literally, it's two lines in a row where she goes,

[01:11:35] this is Brian, he was my boyfriend 13 years ago,

[01:11:39] this is my daughter, she's 12.

[01:11:41] It's literally that quick.

[01:11:43] Yeah.

[01:11:44] And then like she says in like a few scenes later.

[01:11:49] An hour into the movie.

[01:11:51] Yeah, he's basically like, so 13 years old,

[01:11:54] or whatever and she's like yep, he never asked about it.

[01:11:57] That conversation happens an hour into a movie

[01:12:00] that is an hour and 45 minutes long.

[01:12:02] Uh huh.

[01:12:03] And she says like, are we going to talk about the thing

[01:12:05] that we're not talking about?

[01:12:06] And what clearly Cameron Crowe thought was like

[01:12:08] a funny Cameron Crowe way of talking about it.

[01:12:10] Like let me put it this way,

[01:12:12] if it's Father's Day do I have something to celebrate?

[01:12:14] She goes oh you celebrate.

[01:12:17] Um, I, but in that scene is so rushed at that point

[01:12:22] because the movie is like so behind

[01:12:24] and he knows that's the ending he's trying to get to.

[01:12:27] But I look at it and I'm like,

[01:12:29] the scenes with him in Rachel McCam's kind of work the best

[01:12:32] because it's an interesting dynamic.

[01:12:34] Yeah, I think that's fair and also there's no racism at play.

[01:12:37] Yes.

[01:12:38] Right.

[01:12:39] You're not just thinking about the fact, yeah.

[01:12:41] It's the element of the film that has nothing to do

[01:12:43] with white people being in Hawaii.

[01:12:45] Right.

[01:12:46] Like you could have said that anywhere.

[01:12:47] I think it's kind of interesting dynamic

[01:12:49] and I do like, like I think they give such short change

[01:12:53] to all the Rachel McCam stuff.

[01:12:54] It's like every 20 minutes they're like,

[01:12:55] oh we got to get back to that stuff.

[01:12:57] That the thing it doesn't earn

[01:12:59] that I kind of find interesting is the thing of like

[01:13:01] I'm going to make you my girlfriend.

[01:13:03] You're my ex-boyfriend who I've held this resentment towards for years.

[01:13:06] Yeah.

[01:13:07] I'm now going through marital troubles.

[01:13:08] You show up at this time.

[01:13:09] Yeah.

[01:13:10] We're not going to get together.

[01:13:11] There's no threat on the table of us having an affair.

[01:13:13] I just need you as someone I once trusted

[01:13:15] to talk me through what's going on here

[01:13:17] and then also realizing at that time

[01:13:18] that he's part of this family inherently.

[01:13:20] Totally.

[01:13:21] Could be a good movie.

[01:13:22] Could be.

[01:13:23] And I mean, but the scene at the end is a great scene.

[01:13:25] It's a great scene.

[01:13:26] And the girl is really good.

[01:13:28] But it also, I was re-watching it again last night.

[01:13:30] The scene at the end is where the girl is realizing

[01:13:32] that she is Bradley Cooper's daughter.

[01:13:34] She is whaling.

[01:13:35] She's yes, she is.

[01:13:36] She's whaling.

[01:13:37] He's tied off every loose end.

[01:13:39] Yeah.

[01:13:40] You know, well we'll get some of the other loose ends.

[01:13:42] Get to some of those other loose ends.

[01:13:43] But he stands outside her hula class at night

[01:13:46] and abandon street.

[01:13:47] Watching her.

[01:13:48] Picture windows.

[01:13:49] Yeah.

[01:13:50] Like every favorite pro movie.

[01:13:51] Thank you for interjecting.

[01:13:52] Where he's stalking.

[01:13:53] With watching her.

[01:13:54] Ugh.

[01:13:55] I'm surprised that you of all people,

[01:13:56] Ben the Peeper-Hosley,

[01:13:58] would oppose to,

[01:13:59] be opposed to the only film we've discussed

[01:14:01] that ends in cinematic pee then.

[01:14:04] I know, but it's just, it's every movie,

[01:14:07] it's like,

[01:14:08] he's okay with like his characters watching people

[01:14:12] or listening to them and shit.

[01:14:14] It's creepy.

[01:14:15] I watch you guys because I'm recording you.

[01:14:17] I'm doing my job.

[01:14:18] I'm not like following you home griff

[01:14:20] into your apartment standing outside last night.

[01:14:23] Yeah, you didn't do that last night.

[01:14:25] Also Esther, when you said,

[01:14:27] I'm watching you because we're recording,

[01:14:29] Esther looked around the room.

[01:14:30] She did.

[01:14:31] She did.

[01:14:32] She looked around, alarmed.

[01:14:33] To look for a hole, a peephole.

[01:14:35] Esther, I have a camera set up.

[01:14:37] Esther's laughing hysterically.

[01:14:39] Sorry.

[01:14:40] I see that of course.

[01:14:45] What I was going to say about the ending scene

[01:14:47] before I got paranoid, was that?

[01:14:51] Yes, it's a lovely scene sort of in and of itself.

[01:14:54] In and of itself.

[01:14:55] But there's something so upsetting as Ben said about him

[01:14:59] just watching.

[01:15:00] There's something that troubles me about the fact

[01:15:03] that she gets it but we have no sort of,

[01:15:07] there's only a couple moments when you're like,

[01:15:09] oh, she may be questioning her parentage

[01:15:12] and she just accepts it.

[01:15:13] If I were 12 and I finally got the news

[01:15:16] that my father who I thought was my father

[01:15:19] was not my father who I love

[01:15:21] and they make it very clear that the kids love Woody.

[01:15:24] He's a good dad.

[01:15:25] Was this other guy?

[01:15:28] There would be a lot more going on other than,

[01:15:31] oh my god, I'm gonna hug you

[01:15:32] and it's gonna be great

[01:15:33] and then the movie is gonna cut to black

[01:15:35] and it bothered me so much watching it again.

[01:15:39] He spends more time talking to the son in the movie

[01:15:42] because he even has that one scene where he goes to his bedroom,

[01:15:44] looks at his collection, talks about Hawaii mess,

[01:15:46] all that sort of stuff.

[01:15:48] There is no such scene of him and the daughter.

[01:15:51] They sort of have like, oh hey, how are you doing?

[01:15:53] And when Rachel McAllum comes by his hotel room

[01:15:56] to do the like, oh yeah, you're celebrating thing,

[01:15:58] she's just outside.

[01:15:59] There are a lot of moments in the film

[01:16:01] with him looking at her and being like,

[01:16:03] but they don't really communicate.

[01:16:05] Right.

[01:16:06] And there is no sense that she might suspect this.

[01:16:11] I mean, except for like there's that moment where

[01:16:14] he brings the Santa and she comes in

[01:16:16] and she sort of like looks at him.

[01:16:18] But I feel like you, I mean this movie should have

[01:16:20] several scenes of them bonding.

[01:16:23] Yes, yes, if it's gonna earn that moment 100%.

[01:16:26] But if you're, of them just talking

[01:16:27] and having some sort of, you know whatever.

[01:16:30] Right.

[01:16:31] If they even just gave it the one scene

[01:16:33] they gave to the son in his bedroom.

[01:16:35] If there was one flag planted,

[01:16:37] it wouldn't be totally earned,

[01:16:39] but it's like they don't even lay out the breadcrumb trail,

[01:16:42] you know to get to that scene.

[01:16:44] Yeah.

[01:16:45] And we as the audience go like,

[01:16:46] oh is that, that was the most important thing in the movie?

[01:16:48] It's like, it's the most honest thing in the movie.

[01:16:51] I don't know if the movie positions

[01:16:52] is the most important thing.

[01:16:53] Also how would she run back into the Hula class

[01:16:56] do her friends not go, who the fuck was that guy?

[01:16:59] Do you know Bradley Cooper?

[01:17:01] It is a very constructed moment

[01:17:04] and it's very much a Karen Krohm moment,

[01:17:06] but it does have this sort of cinematic like.

[01:17:08] It's beautiful.

[01:17:09] And then being able to go back through the window

[01:17:12] and having her.

[01:17:13] With a little more, you know,

[01:17:15] proper graphic.

[01:17:16] We're so not buying into the film at that point

[01:17:18] it's very easy to pick apart the fact

[01:17:19] that he's creepy being there

[01:17:20] and that she goes back into the class frame.

[01:17:22] It does feel like the film is like,

[01:17:23] oh right, also yeah okay okay.

[01:17:25] And then it just ends.

[01:17:27] Now can we talk about this satellite?

[01:17:29] Yeah.

[01:17:30] Let's talk about the satellite I love.

[01:17:32] So there's gonna be a satellite.

[01:17:35] Right.

[01:17:36] It's not a gate.

[01:17:37] This is another thing.

[01:17:38] That's the other thing that's confusing.

[01:17:39] You're like, is he here for the satellite launcher

[01:17:41] for the gate?

[01:17:42] Well they're not connected.

[01:17:43] They're not locking the gate either.

[01:17:45] That is very true.

[01:17:46] Ben, thank you.

[01:17:48] They don't lock the gates.

[01:17:49] Ben?

[01:17:50] They don't lock the gate blessing.

[01:17:51] 200 insight points.

[01:17:52] Because that is a very, very good point.

[01:17:56] This film is about them trying to

[01:17:58] get a gate blessing.

[01:17:59] But maybe if they had just gone

[01:18:01] to bumpy and said like,

[01:18:02] hey we promise we will lock the gate

[01:18:05] and brought Marin with them.

[01:18:07] Yeah, Marin was there.

[01:18:08] He would have been the real media.

[01:18:10] What's your deal?

[01:18:11] So who are you guys?

[01:18:13] I went to Hawaii and I had some mahi mahi.

[01:18:17] I feel like Marin always just goes

[01:18:19] to the most obvious thing in the world

[01:18:21] whenever he's talking to someone who's not white.

[01:18:23] Anyway.

[01:18:26] Do we eat like the roast pork in the pit?

[01:18:29] I can't do Marin today.

[01:18:30] They always put an apple in its mouth.

[01:18:32] What's the deal with that?

[01:18:34] Who are that apples guys?

[01:18:37] What about that big guy who did over the rainbow?

[01:18:40] Is that one of your guys?

[01:18:42] Is that one of your guys?

[01:18:46] But it's just like that comedy store

[01:18:47] just has that like evil menacing energy to it.

[01:18:50] The Honolulu comedy store?

[01:18:51] Yes.

[01:18:52] He's working in the original room.

[01:18:54] The apple from the pick.

[01:18:56] In the joke that we've created.

[01:19:01] What do you think we're talking about?

[01:19:03] The satellite.

[01:19:04] The satellite of love.

[01:19:05] Bill Murray wants it in the sky.

[01:19:07] But then secretly he's going to put a nuclear bomb in it?

[01:19:10] This is one of the things that I did understand more

[01:19:12] on the second viewing of the film.

[01:19:14] Sure, sure.

[01:19:15] When he goes there,

[01:19:16] he doesn't tell anyone that there's a satellite.

[01:19:18] The gate is the cover for the satellite.

[01:19:20] That's the moment where Emma Stone watches the video footage

[01:19:23] that the boy shot and sees the truck

[01:19:26] and gets scared.

[01:19:27] Yeah right, and puts it together.

[01:19:28] Because she goes, that's something.

[01:19:29] She knows how sacred the sky is.

[01:19:31] She knows that they don't want to put satellites

[01:19:32] anywhere above Hawaii.

[01:19:33] And she sees that, then goes to him.

[01:19:35] And he then reveals to her that,

[01:19:37] yes there is a satellite we're trying to put up there.

[01:19:40] What he doesn't know is that the satellite

[01:19:42] has weapons in it because they've told him

[01:19:45] it's just for cellphone reception

[01:19:47] and it's co-financed by Facebook?

[01:19:49] But then he figures it out before she figures it out

[01:19:52] because he looks at his laptop or whatever.

[01:19:54] Right.

[01:19:55] And so he has like,

[01:19:56] she has enough reason to be mad at him

[01:19:58] because if she flips out at him after they have sex.

[01:20:00] She has a ton of reasons to be mad at him.

[01:20:02] They have sex by the way.

[01:20:03] They do have sex.

[01:20:04] They have sex by your toe.

[01:20:05] And here's the thing, when you have sex

[01:20:08] your body makes a promise.

[01:20:09] When you have sex your body makes a promise.

[01:20:11] Whether or not you know it.

[01:20:14] There's so many things we could say.

[01:20:16] Okay, go ahead Esther.

[01:20:17] No I thought something different

[01:20:18] when watching the movie.

[01:20:19] I thought they always knew

[01:20:20] that there was gonna be the satellite

[01:20:21] and then it felt like there was loading.

[01:20:23] I thought her watching the footage

[01:20:24] was them loading something into the satellite

[01:20:27] but I think what you're saying makes more sense.

[01:20:29] Because she's talking about early on

[01:20:32] because she sees the satellite after they have sex.

[01:20:37] She sees the footage after they have sex.

[01:20:39] And right before they have sex,

[01:20:41] she's like showing him the stuff about the satellites.

[01:20:45] And I think that's maybe just

[01:20:46] cause she's obsessed with satellites.

[01:20:47] And he's showing her his cool laptop

[01:20:49] and it's all military grade or whatever.

[01:20:50] There's a lot of stuff about his laptop decals.

[01:20:53] What doesn't that lead to the scene

[01:20:55] with the sunglasses hat?

[01:20:57] So seeing the footage.

[01:20:59] After that, and the fact that

[01:21:00] the footage is what leads to the satellite.

[01:21:02] She uses this betrayal and she goes to Bill Camp

[01:21:03] and is like, I can't work with him.

[01:21:05] Or she goes to fucking fingers.

[01:21:07] Can we talk about this for a second?

[01:21:09] Danny McBride is Colonel Fingers Lacey.

[01:21:11] I had to look up his last name.

[01:21:12] So his character is that he does weird shit

[01:21:15] with his fingers.

[01:21:15] He's like...

[01:21:16] Which is not clear.

[01:21:17] No, I mean he is sort of twitching his finger

[01:21:19] when you meet him.

[01:21:20] Yeah, but here's the way he's twitching it.

[01:21:22] He's doing like full, like finger ruffles, right?

[01:21:25] He is, yes.

[01:21:26] And he also is doing them always right up

[01:21:29] next to his face so that it's in shot for a closeup.

[01:21:32] Finger.

[01:21:33] Which is like...

[01:21:34] Can you put in the fingered thing?

[01:21:36] Oh yeah, can you please put in finger?

[01:21:38] I've already taken notes on that.

[01:21:39] No problem.

[01:21:40] Your pro.

[01:21:41] That's why they call you the pro doer.

[01:21:45] I just feel like if it's supposed to be

[01:21:47] a nervous tick in real life,

[01:21:50] he would be trying to hide it.

[01:21:51] And in this film,

[01:21:52] Especially if he was in the US Air Force.

[01:21:54] It feels like he's showcasing it

[01:21:56] and then badly Cooper calls him fingers

[01:21:57] and he's like, I'm not fingers anymore.

[01:21:59] And then Alec Baldwin yells at him.

[01:22:00] Yeah.

[01:22:01] Alec Baldwin I love in this movie.

[01:22:02] He's great.

[01:22:03] Why is Alec Baldwin know he's good?

[01:22:06] Because he's good.

[01:22:07] He's good.

[01:22:07] Can I...

[01:22:08] That scene where he walks in and McFingers,

[01:22:10] McFingers is like, maybe it all depends on his mood.

[01:22:14] Like maybe he'll be alright.

[01:22:15] And he comes in and he just screams.

[01:22:17] Which no actor can get that.

[01:22:19] Like that's hard.

[01:22:20] He doesn't even scream in like a weird way.

[01:22:22] He just screams aloud and it's so funny.

[01:22:24] There's also my favorite line in the movie

[01:22:26] is when he goes, I don't make me like you

[01:22:28] any less than I already do.

[01:22:30] And Bradley Cooper goes, I didn't know you didn't like me.

[01:22:32] And he just sits there and he stands there

[01:22:34] and looks at him for a while.

[01:22:36] And he goes, yeah.

[01:22:38] But he holds that moment so beautifully.

[01:22:40] He's good, he's good.

[01:22:41] It's just funny that he steals the scene

[01:22:44] in both of Crow's worst movies.

[01:22:46] He's in those with that and he's also very funny.

[01:22:48] Remind me of this at the end of the episode

[01:22:49] because I have a thing I want to say about that.

[01:22:51] Okay, lock the game?

[01:22:51] Yeah, but I want to say it for the end of the episode

[01:22:53] is we're wrapping up our thoughts

[01:22:54] on the filmography of Cameron Brown.

[01:22:54] When we're locking the gates.

[01:22:55] When we're locking the gates.

[01:22:57] I don't know which of those situations it is, Esther.

[01:22:59] I feel like it could be either one.

[01:23:01] Yeah, maybe I'm wrong, I don't know.

[01:23:03] The Facebook thing is also that you mentioned

[01:23:05] is also weird because I feel like that,

[01:23:07] Alec Baldwin says that.

[01:23:09] Yes.

[01:23:10] And then that is in like the day

[01:23:12] of sixth mocking a moment where suddenly

[01:23:14] like everything's okay because Carson Welch

[01:23:16] was actually gonna put nukes on

[01:23:18] was the military didn't know the full extent

[01:23:21] of like what he was gonna do

[01:23:22] so they thought it was something for Facebook.

[01:23:24] Maybe it was something for Facebook

[01:23:26] but really then Carson Welch, I feel like I am.

[01:23:28] If you wanna make a movie.

[01:23:29] We're vomiting right now.

[01:23:31] About Facebook trying to have a nuclear arsenal

[01:23:33] and launch it into space.

[01:23:34] I'd watch it.

[01:23:35] That sounds good.

[01:23:36] I'd watch that movie.

[01:23:37] Social network too.

[01:23:39] War games.

[01:23:40] If your clients had created Facebook

[01:23:41] they would have created Facebook.

[01:23:42] Follow us on Facebook.

[01:23:46] Yeah please do.

[01:23:48] This was my read on that, okay?

[01:23:50] And even the fact that the plot of a romantic comedy

[01:23:53] is this hard to parse on a second viewing

[01:23:55] for all of us and where people who like

[01:23:57] make our lives around analyzing movies.

[01:24:00] I explained the matrix sequence on this.

[01:24:02] Yes you did.

[01:24:03] That shouldn't be easier than this movie.

[01:24:07] This was my sense of what it was.

[01:24:09] Yeah it was way easier.

[01:24:10] I did have to watch the matrix

[01:24:11] though it was like eight times but still.

[01:24:13] My sense was they wanted to create

[01:24:15] a new Air Force gate.

[01:24:17] From that gate they could launch a satellite.

[01:24:19] They wanted a satellite there for like NSA reasons

[01:24:21] or general communication whatever.

[01:24:23] But they knew that the Hawaiian people

[01:24:25] would never allow them to do it

[01:24:26] because of the already tense relationship

[01:24:28] between the American military and the Hawaiian natives.

[01:24:31] And also this guy.

[01:24:32] Yes, right.

[01:24:33] And how, yes.

[01:24:35] So Carson Walsh as an independent contractor

[01:24:38] agreed to pay for the satellite

[01:24:40] because he wants to gain it from,

[01:24:41] I guess he runs a tech company

[01:24:42] and he has cell phone reception,

[01:24:44] fucking shit he wants covered.

[01:24:45] Facebook put up half of the money for the satellite

[01:24:47] or so he said because they wanted to have Facebook

[01:24:51] be covered in that area.

[01:24:52] Sure.

[01:24:53] Right.

[01:24:54] And that way they could sort of hold up their hands

[01:24:59] and be like it wasn't us,

[01:25:00] Carson Walsh wanted to put it up there.

[01:25:01] We're just taking advantage of it.

[01:25:03] But then explain the nuke.

[01:25:04] But then Carson Walsh puts the nuke on

[01:25:07] because he wants to privatize the military.

[01:25:09] Yeah he believes in American sovereignty

[01:25:12] and he wants nuke in the sky.

[01:25:13] Which is never explained by that character

[01:25:15] and is not clear in any of his behavior

[01:25:17] that he feels that way.

[01:25:18] Because then like.

[01:25:19] And he's not doing it in the satellite launch.

[01:25:20] It's like it's gonna happen later.

[01:25:22] Yes.

[01:25:23] They're gonna add the nuke.

[01:25:24] So that actually makes me think that you were correct

[01:25:25] that at some point they do know about the satellite

[01:25:27] but they don't know the nuke that he's putting into it

[01:25:29] and that's what she recognizes

[01:25:30] because that's why she comes to the place?

[01:25:32] Yeah I think that's what she recognizes.

[01:25:33] Yeah, yeah.

[01:25:34] But also that's not something that you recognize.

[01:25:35] It feels at the beginning that they're,

[01:25:37] he's pitching them on the gate and not the satellite.

[01:25:39] Do they know that the gate means

[01:25:40] the satellite's gonna happen?

[01:25:42] I don't know.

[01:25:43] It doesn't matter.

[01:25:44] But here's the fact.

[01:25:45] Because Bumpy says no satellite

[01:25:46] but also if we're gonna allow you to do this

[01:25:47] I need free cell phone reception.

[01:25:49] Here's, and he, two mountains.

[01:25:51] And two mountains.

[01:25:52] He gets two mountains.

[01:25:52] What does that mean?

[01:25:53] I don't know.

[01:25:54] It means they give them back the land?

[01:25:55] I mean I'm assuming that that's what that means.

[01:25:56] That has been previously taken over

[01:25:58] by the American military occupation.

[01:25:59] This is honestly making me so upset.

[01:26:01] It doesn't matter.

[01:26:02] The history of Hawaii is too complex

[01:26:04] for us to get into on this podcast

[01:26:05] but we do need to talk about the fact

[01:26:07] that the satellite launches.

[01:26:08] Bradley Cooper does a great job launching the satellite.

[01:26:11] It's probably the best satellite launch I've ever seen.

[01:26:12] Michael Murnus is somewhere else, right?

[01:26:14] Yes, on the phone.

[01:26:16] On the phone.

[01:26:17] It's a different base, somewhere that's not Hawaii.

[01:26:19] He plays a nerd who helps Bradley Cooper

[01:26:21] with his nerd beard and his nerd glasses, right?

[01:26:24] He dated Annie Baker.

[01:26:25] Oh, does he really?

[01:26:26] Yes, I just found this out.

[01:26:28] Interesting.

[01:26:29] Or at some point dated Annie Baker.

[01:26:29] I know someone quite well who used to date Annie Baker.

[01:26:33] I'll tell you later.

[01:26:34] Ask her.

[01:26:35] Can I sidebar for one second here?

[01:26:38] Is it you?

[01:26:40] No.

[01:26:41] It was me.

[01:26:42] At Comic-Con, I went to the San Diego Comic-Con

[01:26:47] a couple of weeks ago as of the time of this recording.

[01:26:49] Sure.

[01:26:50] I went to a panel about action figures as I want to do

[01:26:55] and on the panel, they accidentally when they were like,

[01:26:59] are you doing toys for Amazing Spider-Man?

[01:27:02] Spider-Man Homecoming.

[01:27:04] Yeah.

[01:27:05] And they were like, yeah, we plan to

[01:27:06] but it's tough right now because they haven't given us

[01:27:07] enough reference material so we wanna make them.

[01:27:10] We wanna do a full line where we have

[01:27:12] not just Spider-Man but also obviously

[01:27:15] Vulture, Shocker, Tinkerer.

[01:27:18] All the villains.

[01:27:19] But they hadn't announced those villains yet.

[01:27:19] No, no that was, that was.

[01:27:21] Right, I remember reading about that.

[01:27:22] You broke the news.

[01:27:23] I fucking broke the news.

[01:27:24] I'm not sure they've announced all of those.

[01:27:25] They have announced that Michael Shurnes

[01:27:26] is playing Tinkerer now.

[01:27:27] Right.

[01:27:28] I don't think they announced the middle person either.

[01:27:31] Shocker?

[01:27:32] I think they announced Shocker.

[01:27:32] Did they announce that Logan Marshall Green

[01:27:34] is in the film and that he's probably

[01:27:36] playing a villain but they haven't

[01:27:37] announced who he's playing yet.

[01:27:38] Right.

[01:27:39] There are a couple other actors

[01:27:40] who they haven't announced that they're playing.

[01:27:41] They also, Bokeem Woodbuyan,

[01:27:41] they said that he's playing a villain.

[01:27:42] And no one knows who fucking Donald Glover is playing.

[01:27:45] And like there are a bunch of actors

[01:27:46] who have unclear roles at this time.

[01:27:48] Annie Baker and Michael Shurnes

[01:27:49] might not still be dating.

[01:27:50] Okay.

[01:27:51] They were at some point.

[01:27:52] Sad.

[01:27:53] Michael Shurnes is playing Tinkerer.

[01:27:53] I broke the fucking scoop.

[01:27:54] The Tinkerer's in the movie.

[01:27:55] I looked, no one else tweeted about it

[01:27:57] and fucking like a bunch of websites covered

[01:27:59] and cited me.

[01:28:00] Oh, that was you?

[01:28:02] That's great, good job.

[01:28:03] That was me.

[01:28:03] I fucking broke that story.

[01:28:04] That's for you.

[01:28:05] I heard that Marissa Tome is gonna play

[01:28:06] Aunt May in that movie.

[01:28:07] Yeah, that's a sclucey.

[01:28:11] But it was a little frustrating

[01:28:12] because I got so much more coverage for that

[01:28:15] than any of the fucking tics up.

[01:28:18] Well, thank you for all of that.

[01:28:20] August 19th.

[01:28:21] Anyway, yeah.

[01:28:22] I just need one second to brag about the fact

[01:28:24] that I broke a fucking story.

[01:28:24] It's out of this point, so see the tic guys.

[01:28:26] Yeah, August 19th, watch it so many times.

[01:28:28] The screeners went out today, I'll say.

[01:28:30] Oh really?

[01:28:31] You haven't watched yet, right?

[01:28:32] Are either of you, like you both have to be like

[01:28:34] I can't review it, right?

[01:28:35] I can't review it.

[01:28:35] Yeah, I don't think I can.

[01:28:36] I definitely can.

[01:28:37] I still probably could.

[01:28:38] Yeah.

[01:28:39] I was going through the list of people

[01:28:40] that were like probably gonna have to say

[01:28:42] they can't review it.

[01:28:44] I can't review it, I bet it's great.

[01:28:46] The satellite- You want me to review it in your name, David?

[01:28:48] Yeah, of course I do.

[01:28:49] The satellite goes into space.

[01:28:52] And it's in space.

[01:28:54] Michael Shurnes tinkering away and communicating.

[01:28:55] Doing great.

[01:28:56] And then Bradley Cooper is like, wait a second.

[01:28:58] Michael Shurnes, why don't you upload

[01:29:00] every recorded sound?

[01:29:01] Well he sees sad Emma Stone.

[01:29:03] He does see sad Emma Stone sitting there all sad.

[01:29:05] She's sad.

[01:29:06] And he had sex with her

[01:29:08] and she forgave him for his weird tone.

[01:29:10] So that's crucial to know.

[01:29:12] And the sky is important.

[01:29:13] That means something.

[01:29:14] We don't know if she swallows this out.

[01:29:15] That's fanfic, I'm sorry.

[01:29:16] I'm bringing my own fanfic into the film.

[01:29:17] All right, Esther just did a spittake.

[01:29:21] No, not spittake.

[01:29:22] 25,000.

[01:29:23] I didn't do a spittake.

[01:29:23] She took a swig of water and it was an awkward gulp.

[01:29:28] It wasn't even my first pump thing.

[01:29:30] Awkward gulp?

[01:29:31] No, no, no.

[01:29:32] Locked the gates.

[01:29:34] She uploads, no, he uploads all sounds?

[01:29:38] The history of sound.

[01:29:39] The history, yeah.

[01:29:40] Every recorded sound?

[01:29:41] Correct.

[01:29:42] Yeah.

[01:29:43] Which also at some point becomes the history

[01:29:44] of movies and TV.

[01:29:45] I was about to say-

[01:29:46] And music, there's a lot of music.

[01:29:47] They're all of Cameron Coe's favorite band.

[01:29:49] He uploads a lot of Dot Abbies.

[01:29:51] Oh yes.

[01:29:52] I just wish it was mostly atonal bleeping

[01:29:54] or whatever rather than a Cat Stevens song

[01:29:58] or whatever.

[01:29:59] I think there's Bob Dylan in there.

[01:30:00] There's Bob Dylan's in there.

[01:30:00] Yeah, and there's what?

[01:30:02] There's a movie theme that's in there.

[01:30:03] There's some iconic movie or TV theme

[01:30:05] that I'm forgetting is in there.

[01:30:06] There's some dialogue too.

[01:30:08] Yes, there's definitely a clip from Animal House.

[01:30:10] I will say that when-

[01:30:12] I saw a fucking Bluto Blutozki.

[01:30:13] You can't tell me otherwise.

[01:30:14] When I was watching it just now,

[01:30:16] I was like, I remember this part.

[01:30:17] It's so stupid.

[01:30:18] The first time me and Pilot had been sitting there

[01:30:21] mostly in Stoney Silence for an hour and 15 minutes

[01:30:23] or whatever being like, God, this movie's a mess.

[01:30:26] When that scene happened, I mean, it's weird.

[01:30:29] It's hilarious.

[01:30:30] It's really funny.

[01:30:31] We were laughing out loud

[01:30:32] because it's completely out of nowhere.

[01:30:34] Yep.

[01:30:37] And so weird.

[01:30:37] And then the satellite explodes?

[01:30:40] It like blows up in space.

[01:30:42] I feel like-

[01:30:43] This is in this movie.

[01:30:45] I'm really glad you had me on this episode,

[01:30:46] but I feel like you should have had someone

[01:30:49] with some science background to explain

[01:30:51] how the fuck this might be possible.

[01:30:53] I think some of the science background

[01:30:54] would just be very quietly like,

[01:30:56] well, none of it has anything to do with anything.

[01:30:58] Like it's all made up.

[01:31:00] If we were gonna really do this episode properly,

[01:31:02] we'd need a panel of eight experts.

[01:31:04] We need someone on Hawaiian history,

[01:31:07] US military, science.

[01:31:09] We need a married person.

[01:31:12] We would need-

[01:31:13] Yeah, we need a married person.

[01:31:14] Yeah.

[01:31:15] I'm an extra to a married person.

[01:31:16] Child psychologist.

[01:31:17] We need child psychologists definitely.

[01:31:18] That's true.

[01:31:19] I felt the same way on both viewings.

[01:31:22] The first time I watched it,

[01:31:22] I was like, well, this scene at least

[01:31:24] is really swinging for it.

[01:31:25] And it's kind of beautiful

[01:31:26] in its cacophony of chaos.

[01:31:29] And then the second time I was like, fuck this.

[01:31:30] It's so dumb.

[01:31:31] It's not really swinging for it

[01:31:32] because it's so basic,

[01:31:33] like the weird montage that plays out.

[01:31:35] It's just like, it's really basic.

[01:31:37] I mean, it's like a MasterCard commercial, right?

[01:31:39] This is also the second of three times

[01:31:42] he does this montage of the entire history

[01:31:45] of like pop culture thing.

[01:31:46] Cause Vanilla Sky ends with when he jumps off the building,

[01:31:49] his life intercut with all the movies

[01:31:50] he's seen and everything,

[01:31:51] and a movie that's already about him constructing it

[01:31:52] and the fucking pilot episode of Rodese.

[01:31:54] Oh yeah, the pilot episode of Rodese.

[01:31:56] She has her running, the running thing.

[01:31:58] We'll talk about this next week,

[01:31:59] but he does, he has a character in the film,

[01:32:02] who in the series, who is a filmmaker,

[01:32:04] who makes a film that is just a super cut

[01:32:07] of similar scenes from different movies.

[01:32:09] And it's the same thing where

[01:32:10] it's just like cacophony of images.

[01:32:13] Kirk Russell.

[01:32:14] That would be a good pseudonym for Cameron Crowe.

[01:32:17] Do you get it?

[01:32:18] Yeah, I get it.

[01:32:19] Great.

[01:32:20] Kirk Russell.

[01:32:23] Honestly, I will say that moment in Rodese

[01:32:25] sort of like made me tear up a little bit

[01:32:27] and then I don't know why

[01:32:27] I may have been going through something.

[01:32:29] Yeah.

[01:32:30] Were you going through anything?

[01:32:31] I wasn't, so I don't know why.

[01:32:32] That's the horrible thing about like

[01:32:34] doing a Cameron Crowe miniseries in the wake of a breakup

[01:32:38] is that even the bad movies make me cry

[01:32:40] and I respect myself less.

[01:32:42] Yeah, I haven't mentioned it before on this podcast.

[01:32:44] I'm sorry.

[01:32:45] Going through a breakup is,

[01:32:48] puts in a lot more of a present tense

[01:32:50] as if it's still a process that is happening to me

[01:32:52] rather than just me not getting over it.

[01:32:55] Anyway.

[01:32:56] I wasn't going through anything

[01:32:58] and I'm just a sucker.

[01:32:59] Yeah.

[01:33:01] We have to lock the gates.

[01:33:03] We have to lock this guy.

[01:33:04] Oh my God.

[01:33:05] No, you can't lock this guy.

[01:33:07] Yeah, how dare you?

[01:33:07] You don't own this guy Griffin.

[01:33:10] Can I?

[01:33:11] So go ahead.

[01:33:12] No, what were you gonna say?

[01:33:12] I'm sorry.

[01:33:13] Well, after he blows up the satellite

[01:33:14] there's 20 more minutes.

[01:33:17] Yeah, he has to wrap up

[01:33:18] each individual plot line of the movie.

[01:33:20] First Alec Baldwin yells at him.

[01:33:22] Which is good because Alec Baldwin's good.

[01:33:23] He does a good job yelling

[01:33:24] but then like five minutes later.

[01:33:26] This is a hot shot.

[01:33:27] Mr. Cool Guy over here.

[01:33:28] Then five minutes later Alec Baldwin's like,

[01:33:30] Jesus we just found out

[01:33:31] Boomer wanted to put a nuke on the satellite.

[01:33:33] He's rested and thank you for that.

[01:33:35] And you were like,

[01:33:36] wait the military wasn't on top of the nuclear weapon

[01:33:39] he wanted to put on the satellite?

[01:33:40] It turns out no one knew everything

[01:33:41] but everyone knew a little

[01:33:42] and we pieced it all together.

[01:33:43] This is also a movie where they don't tell you

[01:33:46] the thing that they just avoided happening

[01:33:48] until after they avoid it.

[01:33:50] Yeah.

[01:33:51] Like there's no stakes in any scene

[01:33:52] because you're like I don't understand

[01:33:53] what the risk is.

[01:33:55] And then they go like,

[01:33:56] well it was gonna be this

[01:33:57] so thank you for stopping that.

[01:33:58] Well okay sorry that gets into the weird timeline

[01:34:01] of the movie which I do think Bradley Cooper

[01:34:03] knew that there was a nuke.

[01:34:06] Yeah?

[01:34:07] Because he gets the plan

[01:34:08] which he looks at on his computer.

[01:34:10] Exactly, he doesn't know initially that there's a nuke

[01:34:12] but then he looks at his laptop

[01:34:13] which has cool decals on it.

[01:34:15] Really cool decals.

[01:34:16] After he fucked Emma Stone with his weird toe.

[01:34:18] No no no before he fucked Emma Stone

[01:34:19] with his weird toe.

[01:34:20] It's before they have sex?

[01:34:21] Yeah maybe you're right.

[01:34:21] It's like looking at his cool decals.

[01:34:23] After the party.

[01:34:24] And then she shows up

[01:34:25] and she's like I hear you have a weird, yeah.

[01:34:27] We haven't even talked about how like

[01:34:29] how uptight Emma Stone at this party

[01:34:33] gets a little drunk.

[01:34:34] And she's in her uniform.

[01:34:35] In her uniform and like gets down with Bill Murray.

[01:34:39] Which there's no excuse for that other than

[01:34:41] hey Bill Murray likes to dance.

[01:34:43] Sure why not?

[01:34:44] Why not have Bill Murray do something in this movie?

[01:34:45] It's not like he's doing anything.

[01:34:48] Yeah, yeah he's not doing anything.

[01:34:50] No he plays the guy who wants to put

[01:34:52] a nuclear weapon in space.

[01:34:54] And then oh.

[01:34:55] That's like what Doc Final Moment.

[01:34:56] That's what like Doctor No wants to do.

[01:34:59] Talk about his final moment.

[01:35:00] His final moment is a beautiful shot of him

[01:35:03] essentially being engulfed by the sky right?

[01:35:06] It's like this pure white sky and then the beach

[01:35:09] and he's so small in the image

[01:35:11] and it's just a clear sky.

[01:35:12] You can't see anything else right?

[01:35:14] And he's like walking around with his arms out you know?

[01:35:17] Like the fucking poster for Shine.

[01:35:19] And he's sort of looking up at the sky.

[01:35:21] It's like the poster for Shine.

[01:35:22] It is like the poster for Shine

[01:35:23] and he's taking it all in.

[01:35:24] He's like Jeffrey Rush in the movie Shine.

[01:35:26] And he's getting like a little teary eyed

[01:35:28] like you know overwhelmed by the majesty of the sky

[01:35:30] which is what the movie is about.

[01:35:32] It is.

[01:35:33] And then you know they cut from the wide,

[01:35:36] the super super wide shot to a close up of his face

[01:35:39] and he's tearing up while he's looking at it

[01:35:40] but it seems like out of joy.

[01:35:42] They cut back to the wide shot

[01:35:43] and a bunch of men around behind him

[01:35:44] and they arrest him.

[01:35:45] And he's still like sort of like ah the sky.

[01:35:48] This is don't you doesn't feel like Bo Fingery?

[01:35:51] That was just Bill Murray hanging out

[01:35:52] and they were like okay quickly bum rush him

[01:35:54] and we'll get it on camera.

[01:35:55] Well I don't remember who tweeted this

[01:35:57] but I saw Pete's Dragon last weekend

[01:36:00] which is delightful.

[01:36:01] I'm looking forward to it.

[01:36:01] Love it.

[01:36:02] A really really charming movie.

[01:36:03] But someone tweeted,

[01:36:06] I thought he was good in Pete's Dragon.

[01:36:08] I'm gonna paraphrase, I'm gonna fuck it up

[01:36:09] and I can't remember who wrote it.

[01:36:11] But I thought he was good in Pete's Dragon

[01:36:14] but I think it was a little irresponsible

[01:36:16] of the filmmakers not to tell Robert Redford

[01:36:17] he was in a movie.

[01:36:19] I think it was Joe Reed wasn't it?

[01:36:20] I hope it was the great Joe Reed.

[01:36:22] But I just like I always,

[01:36:23] that joke always gets to me of like oh Bill Murray

[01:36:26] didn't know he was in this.

[01:36:27] They just found him at Hawaii drinking

[01:36:29] and shot a movie around him.

[01:36:31] Like the Bo Finger thing is always funny

[01:36:32] and especially because when I say that he looks great

[01:36:35] in this movie he looks great in this movie

[01:36:36] because they make him look so shitty.

[01:36:38] Yeah they do.

[01:36:39] They make him look so bad in this movie.

[01:36:41] Like he's never looked older and more worn out

[01:36:43] than he does in this film.

[01:36:44] Maybe it wasn't, I can't find a tweet.

[01:36:47] But like Bill-

[01:36:48] I saw that tweet in live.

[01:36:48] It was great tweet.

[01:36:49] And especially after you've seen Pete's Dragon

[01:36:51] I dare you to watch the movie with that tweet in mind

[01:36:53] and not laugh every time Robert Redford comes on screen

[01:36:56] and is like we're gonna chase that dragon.

[01:36:58] The idea that he didn't know it was a movie.

[01:37:00] Sorry.

[01:37:04] This, I mean what's so bizarre about this performance

[01:37:07] is like Bill Murray especially in like the post like

[01:37:10] aughts you know.

[01:37:11] Post loss in translation.

[01:37:13] Right like you know 21st century Bill Murray

[01:37:15] is known for being like this like you know like.

[01:37:18] Mythic figure.

[01:37:20] So full enigmatic.

[01:37:22] But like so minimalistic.

[01:37:23] You know so stripped down so understated you know

[01:37:26] so few words it's his energy it's his body and whatever

[01:37:29] you know like he's conveying these multitudes of sadness

[01:37:32] without making jokes or whatever.

[01:37:33] And then you watch this film and it's like

[01:37:36] oh he's literally doing nothing.

[01:37:38] Like usually he's able to imply a lot of depth

[01:37:41] just by sitting on a bed.

[01:37:42] But also usually there's a story that makes sense

[01:37:45] to go with him sitting on a bed.

[01:37:46] But the way they position him in the film

[01:37:48] it's like okay is he supposed to be like Richard Branson

[01:37:50] or is he supposed to be like Elon Musk.

[01:37:52] You know is he supposed to be like someone that

[01:37:53] like people like and think that he's kind of a cool renegade

[01:37:56] and he's sort of like a slob.

[01:37:58] Or is it supposed to be that he's like the man

[01:37:59] because they say that like Bradley Cooper selling out

[01:38:02] to him in his company.

[01:38:03] And she says something about how he's the devil.

[01:38:05] I danced with the devil.

[01:38:07] But he seems like such a loose like low key guy

[01:38:10] and he doesn't seem like in a snake in the grass

[01:38:12] kind of way.

[01:38:12] He just seems like some old guy who's drunk at a bar.

[01:38:15] Yeah more like the film plays him

[01:38:17] for most of the movie is kind of like

[01:38:19] oh the eccentric billionaire you have to put up with

[01:38:21] but he's paying your salaries so you know whatever.

[01:38:24] And he says these like marginally profound things

[01:38:26] like he says that like it hits you like a ton of bricks.

[01:38:30] What is it?

[01:38:31] You know what I'm saying?

[01:38:32] The scene where he gets angry at Bradley Cooper

[01:38:34] after the thing like he's not even angry at him

[01:38:36] in the way that like you'd expect Baldwin's reaction

[01:38:38] is what Bill Murray's reaction would be.

[01:38:40] But instead he's like well can't say

[01:38:43] you didn't make an impression you know

[01:38:45] or like whatever the fuck he said you know.

[01:38:47] I guess this is payback.

[01:38:48] Like it's like it feels like they shot the rehearsals

[01:38:52] before Bill Murray turned it on.

[01:38:55] You know which quote I'm talking about.

[01:38:57] Yeah if you can find that thing.

[01:38:58] Cause even in the trailer they put that in there

[01:39:01] to make it sound like that's Bill Murray

[01:39:04] talking to Bradley Cooper about love.

[01:39:06] And in the movie that's Bill Murray talking

[01:39:08] to a reporter at the party about like his business.

[01:39:12] The future isn't just something that happens

[01:39:14] it's a brutal force or the great sense of humor

[01:39:16] that will steamroll you if you're not watching.

[01:39:18] That's a line he has.

[01:39:19] So in the trailer they make it seem like

[01:39:21] that's like Bradley Cooper's life.

[01:39:22] I'm in love with two women I don't know which one.

[01:39:25] And that sounds like a classic Cameron Crow thing

[01:39:27] that someone would say in response to that.

[01:39:29] It's a line that doesn't make any sense

[01:39:30] if you think about it for one second.

[01:39:31] It makes no sense.

[01:39:32] It doesn't have anything to do with anything

[01:39:34] and he says it to a reporter at a party

[01:39:35] with no context.

[01:39:37] And then also there's the fight

[01:39:39] between Woody Krasinski the real life brother

[01:39:42] of John Krasinski who plays himself in this film.

[01:39:44] And this is Canon now within this podcast.

[01:39:46] This is Canon.

[01:39:47] There's the fight where he has a fight

[01:39:50] with Bradley Cooper that's nonverbal.

[01:39:53] You also forgot to mention that he destroys

[01:39:55] their Christmas long.

[01:39:56] Karate chops like a Santa.

[01:39:58] Also I feel like that's not really a fight

[01:40:00] that's nonverbal.

[01:40:00] No it's a summit.

[01:40:01] It's yeah.

[01:40:03] They decide who the vagina belongs to right?

[01:40:06] I mean David.

[01:40:07] Yeah well.

[01:40:09] David.

[01:40:10] Go ahead.

[01:40:11] You said something earlier.

[01:40:12] I was gross.

[01:40:13] And he acknowledges that the daughter is Bradley Cooper.

[01:40:17] Right.

[01:40:18] And they're like okay with it.

[01:40:19] Yes there are subtitles.

[01:40:22] Yeah it's done in subtitles because again James,

[01:40:24] I mean James Cameron Crow.

[01:40:26] Kirk Russell is like guys would have this be amazing

[01:40:31] if it was subtitled.

[01:40:32] Like all of his subtle.

[01:40:33] It feels.

[01:40:34] It would work if you would set it up

[01:40:35] very nicely through the movie.

[01:40:36] Yeah I kind of like it but it's like

[01:40:38] it's too much to throw in the last scene.

[01:40:40] It's too much.

[01:40:41] It's the second to last scene.

[01:40:42] You're like oh this movie's gonna go there?

[01:40:44] Okay.

[01:40:45] And they're also basically he's you know

[01:40:47] being like Rachel McAdams and he's like

[01:40:49] you can have Rachel McAdams you know

[01:40:51] and you're like oh great what a great decision

[01:40:53] he's made.

[01:40:53] And there's a moment where he goes

[01:40:54] did you fuck my wife and he goes no I fucked

[01:40:55] Allison then.

[01:40:56] Which is so disgusting.

[01:40:58] Yeah it's gross.

[01:40:59] He fucks him and he's like what she's like 25

[01:41:01] you're 40 don't do that you're disgusting man.

[01:41:04] What would you have to talk about?

[01:41:05] You're at very different places in your life.

[01:41:07] My toe.

[01:41:08] Yeah.

[01:41:08] The sky.

[01:41:09] Yeah.

[01:41:10] How there's definitely not a nuke going on

[01:41:11] in that saddle.

[01:41:12] She loves fixing old broken man.

[01:41:15] My decals and my life up.

[01:41:15] It's a wreck of a human.

[01:41:17] But there's a wreck of a man.

[01:41:18] There's sweetness in the sky.

[01:41:20] And there was greatness in the sky.

[01:41:22] The sky.

[01:41:23] It's about the sky.

[01:41:24] Aloha.

[01:41:26] But the sky okay so the sky thing

[01:41:28] I was thinking about this watching it last night

[01:41:31] is like if he thought that Allison Aang

[01:41:34] was supposed to be a joke or like all of her stuff

[01:41:38] like is her love of the sky supposed to be

[01:41:42] just her personality?

[01:41:44] Is it supposed to be tied to her Hawaiian heritage?

[01:41:48] I don't know.

[01:41:49] I don't know.

[01:41:50] I like the sky.

[01:41:51] Shrugging.

[01:41:52] Yeah we know you like the sky.

[01:41:53] That's why they call you the Sky Master.

[01:41:58] They call you Sky Captain for a reason.

[01:42:00] I'm one of the best cloud pointer outers you ever heard.

[01:42:05] You're good at pointing out clouds in the sky.

[01:42:07] I feel like we're all in a weird mood.

[01:42:08] Yeah we are.

[01:42:10] You wanna put your box up again?

[01:42:11] No, cause I'll be like yo check it out.

[01:42:12] That's a dog and everyone's like you're right.

[01:42:14] So you're good at pointing out what clouds look like.

[01:42:16] You also upload files into the cloud.

[01:42:18] That is true and I am a fucking pro baby.

[01:42:22] Like that movie.

[01:42:23] Yes.

[01:42:24] What?

[01:42:25] Sex tape.

[01:42:26] Oh I.

[01:42:27] That movie.

[01:42:28] I thought you were implied.

[01:42:29] Is that what it's called?

[01:42:30] Yes.

[01:42:31] That is what it's called.

[01:42:31] It's about two people who make a sex tape.

[01:42:33] And it goes into the cloud.

[01:42:34] Yeah and then they give out free iPads

[01:42:36] to all their friends with it on it.

[01:42:38] No because of the cloud.

[01:42:39] They give them out first.

[01:42:41] You know when you give someone a device as a present

[01:42:44] you always put them onto your cloud account?

[01:42:46] Yeah of course, of course.

[01:42:47] So they gave everyone iPads before making the tape

[01:42:50] all tied to their cloud including their mailman.

[01:42:56] Esther when you said that what I thought you were saying

[01:42:58] is that Ben uploads this podcast

[01:43:00] to a satellite to try to jam it.

[01:43:03] What if he did?

[01:43:04] The only reason.

[01:43:05] This is his screen sound.

[01:43:06] How quickly would we destroy a military satellite

[01:43:08] if our file was uploaded to it?

[01:43:09] 70 episodes of Blake Check with Krithu Davis.

[01:43:11] Do you know this movie doesn't explain

[01:43:13] how uploading a bunch of movies and sounds

[01:43:15] to a satellite makes it explode?

[01:43:17] Nope.

[01:43:18] Doesn't explain that.

[01:43:19] I know.

[01:43:20] Let's play box office game May 29th, 2015.

[01:43:24] This movie opened number six with $9 million.

[01:43:28] Do you wanna know how much this movie made total?

[01:43:30] How much?

[01:43:31] It made $21 million domestic

[01:43:33] which is about half its budget.

[01:43:34] Wow.

[01:43:35] And it made $5 million foreign.

[01:43:38] I'm sorry, it made five.

[01:43:40] It made $5 million in the rest of the world.

[01:43:43] Yeah.

[01:43:44] That is astonishing for a movie starring white people.

[01:43:48] Like, but I mean how are you gonna sell this movie?

[01:43:50] This movie doesn't make sense to Americans

[01:43:53] and Hawaii is technically in America.

[01:43:54] I think they just gave up.

[01:43:55] I bet they just barely even released it in other places.

[01:43:59] Yeah that's a good call.

[01:44:00] I mean.

[01:44:01] Not that it would have done well there

[01:44:03] but to make 5 million shows that they weren't even tried.

[01:44:05] Apparently this movie made $1,900 in Spain

[01:44:09] just to let you know.

[01:44:10] I just looked up the breakdowns.

[01:44:12] How to do in Hawaii?

[01:44:14] Hawaii's part of America.

[01:44:15] So that means 200 people in total

[01:44:18] went to go see Aloha in Spain.

[01:44:21] So it opened number six with $9.6 million.

[01:44:26] Okay.

[01:44:27] So it's not even in the top five.

[01:44:29] The top five it's May 2015 so it's what you might have met.

[01:44:32] Furious Seven isn't there.

[01:44:34] No Furious Seven is number 11.

[01:44:35] That came out in April.

[01:44:37] I thought it was still going strong at this point.

[01:44:39] I mean it's collected a very healthy $350 million.

[01:44:42] Okay.

[01:44:44] So then, if we go.

[01:44:45] Number one is a new movie starring

[01:44:47] one of the stars of Furious Seven.

[01:44:50] Number one is a new movie starring

[01:44:53] one of the stars of Furious Seven, San Andreas.

[01:44:56] Correct.

[01:44:56] $54 million.

[01:44:59] The Rock.

[01:45:00] Avengers Age of Ultron also in the five.

[01:45:02] Number five.

[01:45:03] Ooh.

[01:45:04] How the mighty have fallen.

[01:45:06] What's his fifth week?

[01:45:08] Wait, what week is this?

[01:45:09] May 29th, 2015.

[01:45:11] Oh, Avengers came out last week of April?

[01:45:13] Yeah, first week of May or whatever.

[01:45:15] Whatever, whatever.

[01:45:16] Okay.

[01:45:16] So that's number five.

[01:45:17] Number one, San Andreas.

[01:45:19] Aloha's number six.

[01:45:24] Give me a hand about number two.

[01:45:25] Number two is a sequel.

[01:45:27] Did much better than the first movie.

[01:45:29] Oh, Pitch Perfect Two.

[01:45:30] Yes.

[01:45:31] One of only two films in history

[01:45:33] to outgross the original film

[01:45:35] in its opening weekend alone.

[01:45:37] And the other one was, I don't know.

[01:45:40] Awesome Powers to Spy Who Shoud Be.

[01:45:42] Those are the two sequels

[01:45:43] that outgrossed the original in one weekend.

[01:45:45] Okay.

[01:45:46] Number three is a great movie that nobody likes.

[01:45:50] Do both of us like it or do you like it?

[01:45:51] We both like it.

[01:45:54] Oh baby.

[01:45:54] It fell from number one the previous week.

[01:45:56] It was a financial disappointment

[01:45:59] for the Disney company.

[01:46:01] The company of Disney.

[01:46:03] So it came out May 21st.

[01:46:05] It came out Memorial Day weekend.

[01:46:07] Did, that's right.

[01:46:08] It was a Disney picture that we both like

[01:46:11] and that movie is called Tomorrowland.

[01:46:13] That's right.

[01:46:14] I saw it alone in a theater,

[01:46:16] the Court Street Regal.

[01:46:19] There was two other people sitting

[01:46:20] like a few rows in front of me

[01:46:21] who were making out and then they laid down

[01:46:26] on the seats.

[01:46:27] And I think there was some funny business going on.

[01:46:29] They were not that invested in Tomorrowland.

[01:46:32] I'll tell you that much.

[01:46:32] Shame on them.

[01:46:33] They didn't seem very interested

[01:46:34] in the lives of the...

[01:46:35] What an strange movie to choose to do that in.

[01:46:37] They got up to no good like five minutes in.

[01:46:41] It wasn't, I don't think they were really there

[01:46:44] for Tomorrowland.

[01:46:44] Also it is known that Hugh Laurie

[01:46:46] is a natural Iphrodisiac.

[01:46:47] That's true.

[01:46:50] Number four is maybe the best movie of the year.

[01:46:53] Number four is maybe the best movie of the year?

[01:46:55] By acclamation it was probably

[01:46:56] the best movie of the year.

[01:46:58] It was the best reviewed film of 2015?

[01:47:01] I mean kind of, certainly big film.

[01:47:02] Lots of top 10 list.

[01:47:05] So you know what it is.

[01:47:06] I'm looking at it.

[01:47:07] Oh you're looking at it.

[01:47:08] You saw it together.

[01:47:09] I didn't think I was playing this game.

[01:47:10] You're not.

[01:47:11] I'm not.

[01:47:12] Did it become an Oscar play?

[01:47:14] Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

[01:47:16] It was my number one film of 2015

[01:47:17] It's Bad Max Fury.

[01:47:18] Yeah that's right.

[01:47:19] So there you go.

[01:47:20] I mean pretty fun weekend actually.

[01:47:21] A lot of fun stuff.

[01:47:22] Not Aloha.

[01:47:23] That's not fun.

[01:47:24] No.

[01:47:25] Pitch Perfect 2 isn't very fun.

[01:47:26] I never saw Pitch Perfect 2.

[01:47:27] Is not good?

[01:47:28] Not good.

[01:47:29] I don't know either.

[01:47:30] Hey guys, did you know that this movie was nominated?

[01:47:35] For what Ben?

[01:47:36] Teen Choice Award.

[01:47:38] It was?

[01:47:39] Yeah.

[01:47:40] For what?

[01:47:41] It was a choice comedy movie.

[01:47:45] Aloha?

[01:47:46] I dare unifying me one teen who saw Aloha.

[01:47:51] And then also actor to comedy Bradley Cooper,

[01:47:55] actress Emma Stone in comedy.

[01:47:57] I mean, I know those awards decided by publicists.

[01:47:59] That is a point again.

[01:48:00] Emma Stone and Bradley Cooper

[01:48:02] to show up to your awards show.

[01:48:03] Yeah.

[01:48:04] Indeed.

[01:48:05] They didn't win any surfboard.

[01:48:08] I will say this.

[01:48:09] The Martian is funnier than Aloha.

[01:48:11] Yes it is.

[01:48:12] True.

[01:48:13] The Martian deserved that.

[01:48:14] Hearing that movie nominated as best comedy,

[01:48:15] I was like, well, but you know,

[01:48:17] maybe a Martian won't do it.

[01:48:19] It's much funnier than Aloha.

[01:48:20] Okay, so can I throw out?

[01:48:21] Some other movies in that top 10.

[01:48:22] Yes please.

[01:48:23] The Poltergeist remake.

[01:48:24] A lot of forgotten movies.

[01:48:25] Far from the Madding crowd.

[01:48:27] Do you wanna hear something weird that's of no interest?

[01:48:28] Hot pursuit.

[01:48:29] Home.

[01:48:30] Remember when we wanted to see hot pursuit

[01:48:31] and we just never did?

[01:48:32] Yeah, we were like, we're gonna see it.

[01:48:34] Oh, we're gonna see it.

[01:48:35] And everyone else thinks it's bad,

[01:48:36] but we're gonna think it's cute.

[01:48:37] We were so defensive and ready to-

[01:48:39] And then like two days after we never spoke about it.

[01:48:41] I don't know why I see it.

[01:48:43] The, in Poltergeist, the remake,

[01:48:47] the young boy in the family is named Griffin, the character.

[01:48:52] Cool.

[01:48:52] And the actor who plays the young boy in the family

[01:48:54] called Colette is the actor who plays

[01:48:59] a young Arthur in the tape.

[01:49:01] Oh, that's so funny.

[01:49:03] That's kind of a funny little circle, right?

[01:49:05] Yeah.

[01:49:05] Griffin.

[01:49:06] He's an amazing actor.

[01:49:07] He's much better than me.

[01:49:10] He's incredible.

[01:49:11] That's nice.

[01:49:12] I'm sure that's not true.

[01:49:12] He's really fucking good.

[01:49:13] He's more professional than I am.

[01:49:16] He's like unbelievably professional.

[01:49:20] I felt so bad they had to work so hard

[01:49:22] to make him look like me.

[01:49:24] They like put a sandwich here again.

[01:49:25] They're like, can we break his nose?

[01:49:28] Put shit in his hair.

[01:49:29] They didn't say that.

[01:49:30] They didn't, but they had to put glasses

[01:49:32] and all this sort of stuff.

[01:49:33] He's a good kid, good actor.

[01:49:34] Doesn't listen to this show.

[01:49:37] Here's the thing I want to throw out

[01:49:39] that I sort of teased earlier, okay?

[01:49:42] Yes.

[01:49:42] You look at two, Cameron Crowe's two worst films.

[01:49:45] Both-

[01:49:46] Aloha and Elizabeth Town.

[01:49:47] Unsightly.

[01:49:47] Both have like Hail Mary Pass,

[01:49:49] small performances by Alec Baldwin.

[01:49:52] Sure.

[01:49:53] When I look at Cameron Crowe at this point in his career,

[01:49:55] and I think Rodie's falls into this too,

[01:49:56] although I haven't seen the whole season yet.

[01:49:58] And it's this thing that's very, very hard

[01:50:01] and upsetting to watch,

[01:50:02] which is a filmmaker feel like they're trying

[01:50:04] to do a cover of themselves.

[01:50:09] They're trying to make the films

[01:50:11] that people expect them to make.

[01:50:13] And those films I think were a reflection

[01:50:15] of where he was at those points in his life.

[01:50:18] He's now a divorced man.

[01:50:19] He's 60 years old.

[01:50:21] He's had a lot of acclaim and a lot of failure.

[01:50:23] And he's still trying to make like a young man's films

[01:50:26] in a certain way.

[01:50:27] And a film films from a worldview

[01:50:29] that I don't think is totally what his worldview is anymore

[01:50:32] or his experience basis anymore, right?

[01:50:34] It's also definitely not what the worldview

[01:50:36] of the world is right now,

[01:50:38] which is the biggest problem with Aloha.

[01:50:40] I mean, look at his haircut.

[01:50:41] It's like, dude, get a different haircut.

[01:50:43] It's fucking 2016.