[00:00:00] Blank Check with Griffin and David, Blank Check with Griffin and David, don't know what to say or to expect All you need to know is that the name of the show is Blank Check Let's get ready to Dumbo! I fucked it up You did, you just said Dumbo
[00:00:26] Okay, take two Let's keep this in Take two Let's get ready to podcast! Great Great We're keeping the first thing in Yes, and this is an episode that everyone's gonna love sonically because so far three out of the four people on Mike are chewing Yeah We got 30 people
[00:00:47] We're hungry boys I'm off Mike chewing Ben's got a salad David's got a burger You got some pork in there, Ben It's pulled chicken It's a pulled chicken salad I have a bagel twist, untoasted It seems Perverse Right Did you ask for them to toast it?
[00:01:04] I did and in fact as they rang it up it said bagel twist, warmed Which is, you know Here's my question They have a special button in the system A bagel twist button Did you get your raspberry coffee?
[00:01:16] But the warmed button I'm saying specifically to add plus warmed It's like when you add milk I got my raspberry coffee Do you know this about him, Karen? He drinks coffee with like raspberry syrup When did this begin?
[00:01:29] You want to smell a little whiff of it? It smells better than it tastes Hand that over Wait, it smells better than it tastes? I would argue It does smell nice I like the taste Most people like the smell dislike the taste Please take a sip
[00:01:41] I think you'll think it's too strong This tastes like coffee Okay Well But I also don't drink a lot of coffee so Sure I like me some cough You too I'm a coffee boy Yeah You're all hungry boys I'm so hungry I'm a hungry boy today
[00:01:57] You're always a hungry boy He's growing Yeah We all have busy days We all are busy We're coming off of like busy jam packed days The four of us I gotta speak some truth You saw this You just saw this mode Just saw it My day
[00:02:12] Do we need an intro at all? We'll get to it Okay cool We've got at least another 30 minutes of pre-amble You're right We went to see the Nets Last night I just saw the pictures I can't believe you guys actually did that We did And actually
[00:02:26] It's gonna sound pretty good You claim your audio is It sounds terrible Yeah No it sounds good Which is like a win for us Like I did a good job You killed it You did do a good job But then I did a bad thing today
[00:02:37] What did you do Because I went to Dumbo And then I checked Twitter And people were like Uh, Frank and Weenie Ben Oh right You didn't put it up I forgot I'm gonna do it He forgot it existed I literally forgot Huzzly I know Huzzly
[00:02:52] So it's on the record here I fucked up I get one mulligan Two I get two mulligans a year I was about to say You better You better rough that Yeah So I get one more mull And you did nail the basketball game
[00:03:03] Which everyone said could not be done So thank you But you're right Our patrons I let you down And I'm sorry Frank and Weenie Right But at the time At the time you're listening to this episode Frank and Weenie has already posted That's true Hopefully If not
[00:03:18] Maybe another talking to is required Yes It'll be out A polite conversation It'll be out Our Patreon commitment And the BeBalls boys episode is coming up May 11th Yes And here's a little tease I'll give It's definitely a live color commentary Being the most traditional sense
[00:03:38] On the record I wanna say something that we did not realize Was happening during the game Cause we were there Uh-huh We did acknowledge that Gabrielle Union was there Gabrielle Union The Great Gabrielle Union Wayne's wife Yes The most exciting part of the game for me Right
[00:03:53] He was really pumped A movie star If you remember There were also another couple of times Where someone stepped out of the court And the crowd cheered Like someone in plain clothes Yes And at the end You saw Dwayne taking pictures with people Yes
[00:04:04] It was with the banana boat crew Which is LeBron James, Chris Paul And Camilla Anthony The other His pals in the league And they called themselves The Banana Boat Crew I'll explain that in one second One second
[00:04:17] But yeah, so like they came to like see his last game LeBron was there, Les? LeBron was there Star of Space Jam 2 I was about to say this should be Like more exciting for you Exactly They walked in like Another movie star Exactly Right Trainwreck Yeah
[00:04:31] They walked in unannounced Just as the game was starting And they never did the sort of You know the cameras In the arena Never found them So I assume they sort of told them Don't do that That was all those on Court photos at the end Exactly
[00:04:42] Which makes sense Cause they're all buds They all were drafted In the same draft So a few years ago Yeah These four guys Dwayne Wade, LeBron Carmelo Anthony And Chris Paul And people And their families Their wives Their kids Whatever Right Chris Paul of the YouTube Pals No
[00:05:01] Chris Paul You might know him from Allstate ads with his brother Where he has like a fake twin brother Probably not Yeah They all went on vacation together I think in like the Caribbean or something Yeah And they were posting on Instagram Like lots of selfies drinking wine
[00:05:16] Cause you know LeBron's obsessed with wine And they're always He did not know this He loves wine Once he gonna get his own wine That's a great I assume like He should I mean part of the California move Yeah Winery Oh my God Could you imagine the fucking
[00:05:29] LeBron I wanna imagine him going to like Kurt Russell for winery advice They should link up Yes Sorry LeBron And there was one shot of them all On a banana boat together And it became so So they did not dub themselves The people dubbed them
[00:05:45] The Twitter dubbed them that But they have They have like embraced it The banana boat crew So they are the banana boaters And we are Let's say it The bigger elephant crew Yeah Exactly I mean look Is this like fucking slam dunk Triumph He got it back
[00:06:05] Not necessarily This is like He threw the ball from the Entire other side of the court Yeah And it like hit the backboard So it's still like pretty good And you're like that's pretty impressive I think that's a good call That's not a point But it's still impressive
[00:06:16] My takeaway is I'll allow Tim Burton to stay on earth And not go to space Which is huge Cause I think we were all Hitting the end of our road Oh I was done Yes And maybe there's a little bit of freedom And knowing we're done here 100% And
[00:06:31] It's the light at the end of the tunnel I don't, yeah Maybe it was just seeing it in the theater Some of that You know what I mean It looks great The things does look really good It looks good Collins in it You know like For some reason
[00:06:44] It's like I just was like a piece of tenderized meat By the time I saw Dumbo I was just like Fine Yes Whatever Submission Here's another thing for me You know call me a sucker Call me an easy lay Oh boy
[00:06:58] You give me a movie where someone says The elephant is heading towards Nightmare Mountain And I'm I mean I'm kinda in Well also Michael Keaton Nightmare Mountain Nightmare Mountain or was it Nightmare Alley It was Nightmare Alley Nightmare Alley You've seen it more recently than I Yeah
[00:07:14] Michael Keaton Also The futuristic design bullshit You love that We're gonna get into all of this Oh yeah It's a real great kind of move I was on the culture gap fest To talk about Dumbo Bragg Among other things Retired bit Yeah, no Bragg is acceptable Okay
[00:07:29] And I know we're just Yeah, we're taking different approaches And I remember Dana was just like Have you just Do you just have Stockholm syndrome Like you know what I mean I was like it's good It's interesting He's talking about his own career And everyone else is like
[00:07:41] What? Yeah What are you talking about It's just like a shitty remake No I do feel First of all I think it's a lot more introspective Than his recent films have been I agree And secondly I think it is still a mess In a lot of ways
[00:07:53] Oh yeah I think most of those problems Land on the feet of the script But he has found some coherent ideas That transcend How sort of generic And unfocused the script is at times But We'll get into that We'll gala-s
[00:08:06] We'll talk about that for five and a half hours Our guest today of course From Polygon The great Karen Hello Is here Hi Karen In the studio And this is a movie with some KBs Oh yeah big time Big time I'm wearing my Michael Keaton shirt today Yes
[00:08:21] In honor of this recording Which they very kindly Sent me a Michael Keaton shirt Shout out to Super Yaki Have you got any? Super Yaki It's here in the office right I don't know I think it has it I think it has it I gotta get a fan
[00:08:35] Are any of the listeners out there That aren't familiar with the term KB Could we elaborate please We talked about it on Way to Water but But also did they want to listen to that one Yeah That's what I'm saying This is a blockbuster up here Yeah Yeah
[00:08:49] KB of course is a Karen's boy Yes Yes And how would you define a Karen's boy I mean aside from the actors Who you have crushes on Um I feel like The closest approximation I can think of is One of your previous guests Of an Alice in Wonderland
[00:09:09] Made a tweet That was once like Everybody that you have a crush on Looks like a half melted candle Sure And I believe on the last episode I was on we refer to as Either A have a lot of face Or B put in the work
[00:09:25] They're all true They definitely have a lot of face Oh yeah Well that's how I like Michael Keaton's Like straight shot He has so much face We just have a lot of face We were talking while David was late to the recording Something I would never dare do
[00:09:39] On this show Nope We were talking about how Michael Keaton's Insane expressiveness right He's got a crazy face And he does a lot of face acting Has really just paid off in these later years Where he has the most Interesting wrinkle map a man has ever had Yeah
[00:09:55] Because his face looks like cross hatching His whole face looks like that Right and it isn't even just like Oh he's got like deep lines And he's got like Like the corners of his mouth Or crows feet It's just like every possible angle It's like a fucking
[00:10:09] It looks like a spiral graph It looks like if you took Like in a video game Like characters are just all polygons It's like if you took this color The color skin like off And just looked at the lines Except that it's just A nice plug for polygon
[00:10:25] Thank you so much No but it is that thing It's like when like Pixar Makes a film they always talk About how we like You just see this really dense grid Just a lot of lines Because it's like oh he's got to have like 18 muscles in each eyebrow
[00:10:36] And Michael Keen you're just seeing the grid now Has like a frowns in each eyebrow Yeah Oh boy It's so good Yeah He always looks On the verge of being angry Uh huh But in a way He sort of got pursed A pursed expression He's got tight lips
[00:10:51] And arched eyebrows When we talked about his lips Right Yeah I mean as you should Yes As we all should for all times Yes I agree There is an incredible moment in this movie That feels kind of PKB Where you have a $200 million Disney fantasy remake
[00:11:05] And the movie has boiled down To three wrinkly grey men Talking to each other about business While seated Yes While watching everything else In the movie If we open the bank Like that's I was kind of into that I was just saying You know what I mean
[00:11:23] I was into that It feels weird to see that much grey I'm Truly right here And the fucking Lion King trailer Came out Okay and we're going to talk about this We have to talk about two Disney trailers In the midst of this episode Yeah
[00:11:36] We've been recording other things In advance and on the border We got three Disney trailers Wait what was the toy story for? Oh We got to talk about the fork But you know The most recent one is Let's give me a thumbs up Fucking forky He did 9-11
[00:11:49] Whoa My new thing is that saying the most Get that name out of your mouth You know wash your mouth That was soap Forky's an Isis Yeah No Fork Isis Do you know like My girlfriend has changed her background On her phone My girlfriend is forking
[00:12:06] I know she showed me As a rebuttal to my Reasoned points that he is In Isis and He's not And that he's a narc Narkey David is like the Alex Jones of Forky Exactly That's a good brand There's something about Forky That really puts my teeth on it
[00:12:25] That's just The minute I saw him in that full trailer I was like Get this guy out of here This guy Forky's great He's a little cutie And he's unsettling I think you don't like That's why I like him Forky is making you ask the big questions
[00:12:38] The whole point of Forky Is that he's unsettling Why am I alive? Why am I alive? Forky Forky's fucking tough Like that's he You know what stresses me out When the toys fall out of the car Yeah In any toy story movie I'm like Jesus They're so small
[00:12:52] They're not going to get anywhere You keep on contending that you don't hate the toy story movies But it sounds like everything about the innate concept Of the toy story movie It's so little A franchise based on Griff, I've seen toy story 2 Like many times Many many times
[00:13:06] That was the one I owned on VHS One I've only seen like 3 times I'm just saying They always fall out of the car 3 I only saw the one It's always harrowing And they always question why they're alive They do always fall out of the car
[00:13:16] And they always question why they're alive Forky more explicitly Yeah this seems more explicit That's what I like though Let's stare it in the eyes Forky's movie culture Now Griff, I feel like Your take on The Lion King so far Has mostly just been
[00:13:28] Like I think this will be a hit Like it's not like you're super hyped for it No You're more just sort of like Wow this thing looks like a slam dunk In my whole stances I see it through fairly sober eyes
[00:13:37] Cause Lion King was not one of my movies As a child I think I saw That was huge for me I think I saw the musical On Broward before According to my parents The first movie ever They took me to a theater Makes sense I wouldn't see it
[00:13:49] Because I had a strong anti-death rule I wouldn't see movies that had death in them I mean there's a big death in them Right I heard that Right and I said get out of here I had been on the record saying
[00:14:01] I think it'll be the highest grossing movie of all time I've been standing by that And doubling down The new trailer came out yesterday I am now terrified Yeah the new trailer I mean look Much like the Aladdin trailer Well the Aladdin trailer Best exemplifies this I think
[00:14:18] It's like when that score kicks in You remember you are kind of like Well it's sort of Pavlovian You're like I love this Do you see fucking Hans Zimmer just tweeted Are you ready for the music? And I was like Hans you know
[00:14:30] That's like the only thing that we're ready for He's only Oscar Yeah He should have 20 You should have more For sure it's weird that it's his only Oscar But it's a great score It is a great one And but yeah Also am I ready for the music?
[00:14:41] Like I heard it Yeah In the movie The Lank I have it on my iPhone 25 years ago Right exactly I can get it on Spotify Downloaded Yeah But it's that trailer is so Everything that I feared which is Yeah If their faces are not expressive
[00:14:58] And instead are just animal faces Then what the fuck am I watching? I think it's very unnerving That the trailer only has like Two shots of animals talking And you know they can't do more Because it looks bad and weird It looks crappy
[00:15:11] Right there are three instances where there's Sync sound and it's not even for a full line They only show the mouths moving for about a word or two Which I think is worrisome I'm sure it's something they're going to
[00:15:21] Futs until the last possible second to make it work I guess so I mean I feel like the Jungle Book Had the same thing with the trailer Also kind of hid that Like a little bit By this point they were showing By this far out
[00:15:31] The first couple trailers were kind of oblique By this point you were seeing Like full Bill Murray dialogue So then do you guys want them to have human faces? Well I think Just like re-release the fucking 1994 movie Yes which they did And made a $97 million domestic In 3D
[00:15:48] But also I think Jungle Book They pushed them a little further into stylization Okay I didn't see Jungle They stylized it just a little bit more And they let the performances be a little cartoonier And they were juxtaposed with a real human being And it kind of worked
[00:16:07] I don't love that movie But I think on that level that thing works Yeah it also has a human which helps Right And this I'm just like This looks like fucking Planet Earth That's the thing It looks like Planet Earth It just looks like Planet Earth
[00:16:22] I cannot see the notion And I already think we've discussed it And it's like Scar's supposed to have a personality It just looks like a fucking lion Right We posted about this on Polygon.com But it was like a bunch of screen caps And we mislabeled one
[00:16:35] We were like that's Mufasa And somebody was like that's clearly Scar And we were like Is it look the same? Is it clearly anyone? But that sort of literalism of like Well I mean we just didn't want Scar to be Red in the new film because of course
[00:16:47] In the real Sahara Make him red and make him hot again And it's like who gives a shit And like Simba's not hot anymore Right Like Simba has to be a very handsome Yeah He looks like I mean this is the thing It's like if you're telling me
[00:16:59] Scar can't be red Because we did the research And lions in the Sahara aren't red Is Scar gonna sing a song? Is he gonna sing a song? No they're not He's not the fucking cut he prepared That was like the big news They cut I know They cut
[00:17:13] Be prepared That mics are literally catching on fire That's the second best song in the line Yeah Circle of life That's the only good song in the line Be prepared Be prepared rules Be prepared rules It's great I love Be prepared Elton John
[00:17:28] Be prepared should be your sixth best song Like if you're making a humming Disney musical You know your villain intro song Should be like really good But not But it's always the best song You're saying it punches Above its weight class For the standard villain song
[00:17:42] I think that the like You know more cheerful lion king songs Are a little Yeah they're kind of They're a little like tinny and annoying Slap I mean Oh you think they slap I think when the beat drops You like hood-to-coon-o-matata Do you think it's a wonderful phrase?
[00:17:55] Yeah I like how they eat the grubs Yeah I mean not like that I'm realizing how instrumental Tomo and Pumba must have been In fans childhood 100% I was like these guys are cool They hang out around logs Sure Sure They're dirty boys With like I don't know
[00:18:12] I'd better get some buggy in A lot of it In this new one I think circle of life The problem with circle of life Is it's so fucking good That you're like after the first Part of the opening You're like well this is the best movie Ever made
[00:18:25] And then like the movie's just Sort of downhill That's also that first No stampede rules Stampede rules Love that Amazing That first proper teaser Where it was just the recreate The opening of the film And it just boom The title card Yeah Hell yeah
[00:18:39] And I was just like this Okay this could be the highest grossing film of all time No one can fight this It was highest grossing Oh you mean for the new one When they just redid the original teaser I'm saying And even you who are like
[00:18:49] This looks like a bowl of farts You were like it's effective It gets to you Of course Because of the nostalgia And now in this one You're like seeing the same things Recreated by less expressive animals And they're afraid to show the songs Or the dialogue
[00:19:01] I'm a little worried But You see a trailer That's fucking second bill Aren't you going to go see this anyway I see everything Well I mean like objectively You're like Randall on the street You watch Lion King When you were like 5 or whatever And you see this
[00:19:13] No I think for most people Yes it's going to be an automatic No question I got to see it And I still think the film Is going to end up probably being the Fifth highest grossing film of all time I just thought What's number one right now
[00:19:26] Number one right now Is still Avatar Oh wow Okay It's Force Awakens Domestic Avatar Worldwide The whole problem with your argument Is that Avatar is such a bizarre Phenomenon Yeah And like no In my opinion no normal movie will ever beat it It's going to be something else
[00:19:41] We don't see coming And my argument was that Detective Pikachu Lion King He's on the case I've seen people on the record He's on the case I've seen people projecting That Detective Pikachu might be The highest grossing film Warner Brothers pictures ever released Oh god
[00:19:55] What's that current record holder I think that current record Probably has to be Dark Knight still Let's look it up Let's look it up One second I'm looking at it That's my guess One second please Okay What I was going to say was Dark Knight domestic at least
[00:20:09] Yeah I felt like if they had nailed that If they had figured out a way To make it photorealistic But to have the animals be expressive It was like slam dunk Like 2.2 billion And I thought it had Some of the weird Avatar fluke stuff Yeah
[00:20:24] In terms of it like not skewing To one gender more than the other Dealing with this sort of like Sense of nature You know this very sort of mythic storytelling The Lion King is empty Right There are certain parallels In terms of like what they're keying into
[00:20:40] But now they're so scared about Clearly like They're not making this thing work Here's another thing that's scary in the trailer Lot of these animals in real life Pretty gross looking They're kind of boring That's the thing Like when you see a warthog at the end of it
[00:20:52] It's almost like they cleaned them up In 2DNet animation for a reason Right I'm just like Look I'm not saying I can't like Dirty Pumba But it's certainly more of a barrier That immediately was a Because you forget just how fucking Ugly warthogs are Yeah
[00:21:06] That came up in the slack almost immediately Like I do not like warhugs It's gross It's kind of creepy to see like a meerkat singing Right It's gonna be They cut be prepared They cut be prepared Why would you cut that I don't know Because
[00:21:21] Because they want to be Arrested and deported Right They want to be brought up in high crime I'll tell you the actual reason Because they had to add songs Both for Oscar qualification And to sell Beyonce on taking the role So Elton John like wrote
[00:21:36] Two new Nala songs And I think they were like We have to have a fixed number One must go Like of them all None of what you just said Is giving me a lot of hope I'm not saying it makes sense I'm just saying that was their reason
[00:21:50] But like keep be prepared anyway Yeah And also like the Lion King is 88 minutes long The animated film No question this thing is gonna be like 212 Exactly The same thing with Beauty and the Beast I heard like a river was like 129
[00:22:03] The same running time or something like that Yeah You know Beauty and the Beast added 40 minutes Through the running time somehow Yeah, was that one song? That was I'm the Beast Everyone's favorite songs I wish I wasn't the Beast What's it called again?
[00:22:18] Like Forevermore or something like that The weird part is like That is a song that's extant In the Broadway musical That's quite good And then they just wrote a whole new one They wrote a new song occupying the same Different narrative Version of the same thing My Nubi
[00:22:33] Wanted to get that Oscar nom Which they didn't, right? No they did not I just remember that he's like on the top Of the cast He sounded like a Nubi I went and saw that movie I went to the bathroom And when I was gone
[00:22:46] That number had started And I came back And the Beast was just on the balcony Singing to this guy I was like what the fuck happened While I was being That movie is kind of chlysmically bad You know my take I think the first 30 men
[00:23:01] So that movie are good Until they meet the Beast I think the first 30 men Are kind of a weird Condom doing his Bride of Frankenstein thing And I think they botched The Beast so hard And once they get into Like redoing those numbers With the creatures
[00:23:18] It totally falls apart Save for one performance Luke Evans Is good There's one performance in that movie That is the most consistently I have laughed at any Tucci? I'm not gonna say at With Tucci rules in that movie There's one that's even better Who? It's Audra McDonald
[00:23:34] Oh my god As the dresser The animation of the dresser Is so fucking weird Yeah, that's true And her performance is so good I was in on that Okay, trailer number two Aladdin looks like a shit show Right? But like The kind of shit show that
[00:23:47] I feel I'm so afraid That I'm gonna like so much I think so too But it's so strong With Parkour It's another one of these things too Like the Lion King I mean he does Parkour Or you know He jumps around rooftops In an animated movie
[00:24:00] And we're gonna get to How Dumbo avoids this trap This is of course What I was trying to queue up Is right Is that Dumbo doesn't do What the Lion King does Right Like clearly But also what Aladdin does When you watch both of these trailers
[00:24:11] And you're like Oh so they like muted All the colors Yeah But then they Like the beautiful technicolor Animation is now This is the thing That's so colorful The guy who she wants Yeah Like the parade and all that shit I think it looks really dusty
[00:24:25] It looks all dusty It does look very dusty And then I think you have certain Costumes that look Even still a little muted From their original versions I think elements are colorful I think it's got Sort of like a sand patina Which the nice thing with
[00:24:40] Aladdin was like Sands the base color And then you got All these other things popping The other thing that worries me Watching this trailer In a theater But I had not seen it In a theater before Until I saw Aladdin I just watched it on YouTube
[00:24:52] You know low 75 times And I was just like Oh this trailer has like Six different shots Of someone running away From a building collapsing Why does this have This many like A Yago flies out Of a crumbling Like fucking marketplace So there's gonna be Like six set pieces
[00:25:12] Guy with sheep Looks like so many fucking And there's gonna be Something about how Like he's like A boxer at one point And I'm like fine with the parkour shit Cause at least No it's just like In King Arthur where it's like King Arthur we all know him
[00:25:24] He's a fucking bucks any You know he's like Fucking with people And you're like What's going on And the parkour thing is Like that's in Aladdin Like the opening is like Like sliding away What are you saying You know Right exactly Where I'm like you can do that
[00:25:38] I'll give you that Sure I don't want him to be Doing knife tricks I mean that must be The Richie pitch right Is like he'd be good at that He's gonna make us Richie Rich Does he do a knife trick In the trailer No I'm just saying
[00:25:50] That's the kind of thing I don't want us to Try and think of like other I don't love Right Go get me caught If he's a street kid He's probably doing some shady stuff He's probably doing some shady stuff He steals a loaf of bread
[00:26:02] And then gives it to orphans Aladdin's not shady He could be though But what the fuck Then it's like if he got The lamp he'd be like I wish pain on my enemies Like I don't think it could go that well
[00:26:13] I watched the fuck out of that movie That was just murdering people Yeah Now I'm gonna say the thing That I think we all agree with That might be a controversial take to most I think Will Smith Genie Looks like the best element of that movie
[00:26:26] Oh yeah absolutely It's the element I'm most intrigued by Cause it's the weirdest one Exactly It's the one thing that looks weird And I will say The effects have gotten Better between those two trailers It looks less uncanny When people are like It's weird it's blue Will Smith
[00:26:40] It's like what the fuck Do you want it to look like He's playing the genie My only problem in that first sight of him In the thing that everyone sort of derided His body looked very squishy It just looked off Well as many pointed out Cloud body
[00:26:55] That's the problem Is that in the cartoon He's supposed to be a cloud Well Ryan in the cartoon He's sort of He's like a triangle He's like got big big torso But it works because the guy's not Supposed to have any density Any weight to him
[00:27:07] Of course not But also the idea is He's coming out of a lamp So he sort of comes to a point Which I like I think that's cool Right it's a little unnatural I think it's cool I think he's pretty cool He lives in a lamp
[00:27:17] He lives in a lamp I don't know how many people live in a lamp He's a cool guy Okay now we have to talk about A real American hero And his name is Forky Forky Yeah I'm hearing the mullers looking at the Forky That's all I'm saying
[00:27:29] It's all I'm saying It's not true And I'm just here and you know You know Asanj went down today He's got some Forky talks What if there was a photo of Forky With a long beard Being dragged out Forky is in the Bolivian embassy Right
[00:27:47] But he won't leave He wants to leave That's the interesting hook to Forky He doesn't want to be a toy He wants to die He wants to be thrown out in the garbage You think he wants to That's going to be the plot He wants to die Yes
[00:28:03] Why am I alive Throw me out Interesting I don't want to have sentience Why have you cursed me Okay If that's the actual plot of Toy Story 4 That's interesting That is the plot of Toy Story 4, my friend You're not doing the heavy lifting Is it though?
[00:28:17] Is that the plot? Or is it going to turn into some bullshit About how Woody needs to learn About growing up again or something Can I tell you what I believe the plots of Toy Story 4 are On the record Okay Yeah Forky doesn't understand Why he's alive
[00:28:34] He thinks that it's a burden Right Existence, mortality Existence, stuff Right Right The quintessential millennial storyline Right, you're singing my song Okay Woody tasks himself with trying to convince Forky That being a toy is important And is a good life But in trying to explain it to Forky
[00:28:57] In a way he has not before Because every character he's interacted with Is also a toy He starts to realize that his existence Is kind of meaningless He exists at the mercy of Uncaring gods Who will so quickly throw them away And he's invested his entire life
[00:29:17] In this belief that being there for a kid Is some noble calling And then he meets Bo Peep Who was discarded by society Some fucking porcelain doll Too fragile to exist in our world Who is like fuck it Kids are the past You just gotta live
[00:29:34] We're tiny toys in a brutal world That could crush us at any moment Just fucking live I don't wanna have a kid And through meeting Bo again Who's been living on her own In this fucking post retirement emptiness life Of just like I'm done with the rat race
[00:29:50] Like I'm just about me now And Forky who's like I innately don't understand why you would want a kid I think Toy Story 4 is about Woody Realizing he doesn't wanna be a toy And what does he wanna be instead? I think he wants to be Woody
[00:30:06] I think he's for the You want to be like a sentient creature Who's not tied to an owner Correct That's a lot To throw at the audience Wait, can he talk to humans then? He always has had the ability And I He does talk to Sid
[00:30:21] I kinda think he's gonna talk to a human in this movie Oh shit Hmm, I don't know But then we're gonna have to say big toys I think all the other toys Are gonna stay with Bonnie I think the film will end with Woody convincing Forky
[00:30:37] To stay with Bonnie And Forky will kind of take the Woody role And Woody will ride the road Woody and Bo Peep just living until they break You gotta live in the moment You can't be at the mercy of some child Right, right
[00:30:53] I mean this is some new territory I feel like it's maybe too new I don't see Disney taking that much belief Exactly Look if they're going for that Okay I see shades of that Interesting In the trailer When people go to the trailers amass
[00:31:07] It's got 17 different tones in it I advise you to look to any other toy story trailer All of them are like that Yeah, look You think about this shit a thousand times more intensely than I do I think most people do I've gone so deep on this part
[00:31:21] Exactly I have my beliefs I see certain things My beliefs From them? There are certain things that scare me Sure But we will see But that is my belief The story they wanna tell If that is the story they're telling I am so all in Yeah
[00:31:36] I have my fears But I found the new trailer Encourage it Okay The new trailer is fun, it's good When does it come out? July? June? June? I think June 15th or something I'm ready for Tony Hale to have his time in the sun
[00:31:48] Tony Hale's gonna have his time in the sun Doesn't Tony Hale have like two Emmys? He's in the sun They've never given him a chance, Davis Tony Hale? He's never gotten a shot Tony Hale's doing great He's doing just fine No, he needs four Let him play first
[00:32:02] He has two Emmys How many four keys does he have? Yeah Just the one Just the David's looking it up It looks like just the one One roll is four keys Okay, so let's talk about Dumbo Let's get ready to Dumbo
[00:32:14] Because here's a thing that's really interesting about Dumbo It is only kind of a remake That's the thing Yeah That's what I like about it Because it essentially goes through the plot of the original film Which is only 63 minutes long It condenses it to like 43 minutes
[00:32:29] Adds in a bunch of new stuff And then for the rest of the movie He's just riffing on what would happen next Yes 100% He is riffing on that And he's also riffing on his own career And through Dumbo And he has kind of found
[00:32:44] Because he's always, you know We've talked a lot through doing these episodes About how his early outsider movies Are so locked into that feeling of like alienation And then perhaps as he gets more and more success And what I have glibly said before is he gets happy
[00:33:00] Which many people have in the reddit gone Are you saying he just stopped being depressed And I don't believe he was ever that depressed And depression is in that condition And this and that And I go, no, I'm not saying it's a depression thing
[00:33:10] I just think he found his place in life And perhaps felt a little less out of place Sure, or others might just say Like he did his thing And he had done his thing And he got his sort of validation And they gave him the box
[00:33:24] And he could do whatever he wanted with it And the endless sandbox And all the paints in the world he could ask for But Dumbo is kind of the first time He has made a movie about his career As a weirdo who then like the studio
[00:33:42] Yes, it's reflexive 100% that's what I think That's when the movie is like fucking humming It's a little insane that the three of us Are on the same page with this though Because literally everyone else in my life Is like, no, it was boring There's a bad movie
[00:33:56] Right, I'm surprised by how many people are going like There's nothing there This movie has no reason to exist That's insane And I'm not gonna say this movie completely sticks it No I think it is good I think it's good I don't know if it's good
[00:34:09] Again, I think it's he doesn't like hit the net But like he hits the backboard It's still impressive So I think he hits the net Damn So here's my big take I want to throw out Okay, because I think this movie is good
[00:34:20] But about halfway through it I was like Fuck From the most unlikely of places I see how this movie could be a full-on masterpiece We talked a lot about how Tim Burton Not a big fan of plot No
[00:34:33] Right, he works better with films that are kind of episodic Yeah That are ensemble-y And this movie has an ensemble Works best when it's kind of zooming out Sure And when Dumbo is sort of just the audience Vantage point for this tapestry Of everything going on around Tim
[00:34:48] I mean I think it's very telling That he does so much like Dumbo POV In the movie Yeah That you have so much elephant vision stuff Because it's like Right He's like really trying to put you in the place of this creature
[00:35:03] Being freaked out by everyone looking at him Going like When are you going to do the weird thing you do Right And that shift from revulsion to like admiration That I'm sure Tim Burton felt There was a thing that was circulating around recently
[00:35:18] That a bunch of people like sent us on Twitter That was Tim Burton when he was an animator at Disney That's where he got his teeth out Had his wisdom teeth taken out And then he didn't wipe the blood off of his face
[00:35:28] And he came into Disney studios with his wisdom teeth And carried them around and showed him to everybody And it's like that's just who that guy is Sure And everyone at Disney was like What the fuck are we going to do with this guy Right
[00:35:41] And then somehow they were like You want to make a movie about those teeth And then the movies were giant blockbusters Right And the exact thing that people used to be Like kind of freaked out by And felt like pity towards him for
[00:35:53] Then became like this asset that in the studios Tried to weaponize and I think he kind of got lost within That system Now this moment of clarity I went like Fuck The best version of this movie Might be the one that doesn't even attempt to have
[00:36:10] The conventional Colin Farrell And his kids spying as a through line throughout the movie Hear me out Yeah the kids are the worst part of this movie Don't you take Colin away from me HLEERRMEEEEE The kids could literally in one scene Dying of fire and I'd be like
[00:36:24] Were there kids in the movie? I don't even remember Ben is shocked he likes the kids The kids are bad I like the girl a lot She likes them But she likes science She doesn't have to be like, you know Cue and like
[00:36:34] Disney has successfully pandered to you my friends Yeah they did I liked it a lot It is amazing how they just picked like one thing They were like well you know she likes science Well that's the thing they've been picking for like Every They keep doing it
[00:36:47] Wrinkle in Time But at least Wrinkle in Time is a movie about math Like in this she's in a circus I would be like if I'm Colin Farrell I'm like listen You don't go to school You're not going to be a scientist Learn other shit
[00:37:00] Right it's like time for lunch And she's like let me eat my lunch scientifically It's like no you better eat your lunch quickly Because you've got to clean an elephant cage She's like I love chemistry and Marie Curie And the only thing they show is
[00:37:10] Like she has a chemistry set She never opens it No And she goes and sits in front of Marie Curie When she opened it Their mom died They live in poverty Let her have science What's she going to do with it Also what is she doing
[00:37:25] She's not doing anything She experienced the world She trains the fucking elephant using science No no no She trains the elephant using animal trading She calls it science This movie has good values for kids And I don't want you to see it
[00:37:40] I agree but I think those values Are sold through Dumbo and the adults I don't think the kids really The kids are a little boring The kids are a studio note 100% It's also a movie for children Yeah I mean Dumbo is a child That's the thing
[00:37:55] I think they probably underestimated How well Dumbo would work As an audience surrogate character That's a little weird considering that they made this Film called Dumbo Yes In which there are no children Right There's a mouse But there's no kids Okay so this is my big idea
[00:38:11] So Dumbo, a film in which all the other animals talk The humans don't really have big roles Dumbo himself is mute Sure And he is You're talking about the original The original right And it is another one of those kind of like He's the ultimate vulnerable sympathetic creature
[00:38:27] You know he's kind of a cipher of just like You have to pour your emotions into him Yeah Because he just represents anyone sort of Weird quarks and they're outside or dumb And they're fears of abandonment and all of that This movie beefs up all the human roles
[00:38:42] None of the animals talk I think they were afraid and they were like We got to make it like a babe thing Except babe talks and all the other animals talk Except babe rules Right but they were like it's just going to be
[00:38:50] Like the James Cromwell portion of Babe It's about how everyone else reacts to This magical creature right Sure But Dumbo works so well And the human characters are most interesting When Dumbo is clearly like mirroring Some element of them That I was like fuck
[00:39:08] The version of this movie that I want to see What I think is the perfect live action Dumbo Which this gets close to Is like the fucking War Horse model Or the like Oh-Hazar Balthazar model Where it's like I want No that's true
[00:39:23] They should have gone into Disney and been like Can we have $170 million for an Oh-Hazar Balthazar Dumbo? That's why I would have pitched it as War Horse Sure Even though I don't think War Horse totally works So we discussed it in the podcast
[00:39:33] I was about to say they'd be like Hmm, War Horse wasn't exactly burning the house down either I think you could do a movie that's not him being passed from owner to owner But this film already ends up being somewhat episodic
[00:39:43] And you have different sections focusing on different human characters When Eva Green comes in she kind of takes over for like 20 minutes You know? Sure You start out with a lot of DeVito I mean Keaton has his trunk whatever I think there's a movie where you just like
[00:39:54] Really firmly stick with Dumbo I get you And eat the human character I get what you're saying You know it's like here's how Dumbo relates to two children Who have lost their mother Here's how Dumbo relates to Colin Farrell Who also has a weird physical like Quirk Yeah
[00:40:08] Here's Eva Green who's also forced to perform You know? Here's like the two sides of like capitalism In like DeVito and Michael Keaton Yeah You know? You want it to just be the movie where it's like Each section of it as Dumbo's career goes on
[00:40:24] Each section he sort of passed off to another character for like 20 minutes And that's the whole thing It is weird how little they're willing to kind of bank on Dumbo They're like he can't talk so he can't be the main character
[00:40:34] But it's like this movie is called Dumbo Dumbo rules in this movie too It's so such a good character They've animated him so well So well done Yes And a weird thing that like we talk about Like why remake these Disney animated films
[00:40:47] And just make them like you know less colorful Less expressive The thing I love is that he does make Dumbo Really cartoony in a way that makes him Very odd in a real world setting Because all the other animals are photorealistic And in a cartoon when everyone's like
[00:41:04] That Dumbo, he's a freak Like this is a cartoon Everyone looks weird They have giant eyes And they all talk Whereas in this when the other elephants look totally photorealistic And then Dumbo comes out And he has like Disney eyes on the front of his face
[00:41:19] And the ears have like such a real like Weight and sense of physics to them You're like that is kind of upsetting I understand why this looks weird To people and why they would No Repel You disagree? He's so cute He's so cute
[00:41:34] It's to me the craziest thing in this movie Is that people make fun of him I am not saying that he's not cute No, I know you're not saying that But he also looks otherworldly I guess so But I know that it
[00:41:46] He has to be bullied by the crowd Because that's like one of the three story beads In Dumbo So it has to happen He's different His name is Yeah, I picked up on that I picked up on the fact he's a little bit of an outsider
[00:42:00] Our dear baby Dumbo Oh no, what's happening to that D here? Oh boy I can't remember the last time we blew out mics this far Somehow this is less listenable Than our basketball infrastructure That was recorded in an arena As some shitty boys Yeah, some sneaky boys
[00:42:21] Sneaky boys not shady boys, sorry We're shouting next to us But he's so cute It is like genuinely upsetting when they start making fun of him He's like look how sad he is Exactly He's a little baby elephant
[00:42:34] It's kind of like the moment in Shazam where the bullies beat up the kid with a fucking A crutch Bullies don't beat up kids with crutches That's insane You would go to jail Also after they hit him with their car
[00:42:50] They would run away, they'd be like, oh my god We ran someone over They wouldn't be like, we parked there That's our bit We're bad at parking But you know how like in the movie every time they introduce a new human character
[00:43:06] Or they like introduce that character to Dumbo They're like, here's your job You gotta figure out how to do this with Dumbo Like Colin Farrell hide those ears Or when like Nico Parker herself is like We're gonna use scientific method To figure out how he flies
[00:43:20] And then in all those cases they brush over that process And what I want to see is like the 10 to 12 minutes That is just Colin Farrell one on one with Dumbo I mean I want to see that too And mirroring with Dumbo
[00:43:34] Because you realize all these characters have these Dumbo-esque qualities And they all go from being kind of freaked out by Dumbo to realizing Like, oh Dumbo's making me like address the things I'm too scared to address in myself My own weird broken qualities
[00:43:48] And it's like if you do that movie Where he's not switching from owner to owner But he's switching maybe which person is taking the lead on him for that section And then at the end it's still everyone comes together to save him That would be pretty fucking satisfying
[00:44:01] I think that is mostly what this movie is I think it's close to committing that hard And I think the problem is anytime it tries to string the more conventional like The dad can't connect with the kids Like there's too much of that filler stuff
[00:44:15] Like it makes everything else kind of land less Colin does a noble job but it just feels like them going through the motions with all that stuff Look, I'm in the bag for Colin I know you are
[00:44:25] He never connects with his kids which I really like about this movie He is haunted as fuck He wants to be a cowboy who rides his horse And at the end of the movie he helps Dumbo and the kids
[00:44:38] But I guess he has that one conversation with his daughter on the bench Like, but there's never, he's haunted forever I like that that's the choice he made where he's like No, I think this guy might not be fully recoverable It's sort of like Casey Affleck in Manchester
[00:44:54] But he's like he can't beat it I'm not gonna beat this thing He lost an army, lost his wife He saw the war But I'll say this, it's on the same kind of note Okay, and I understand why obvious Disney don't know you do this
[00:45:08] Don't you think the movie is kind of better if Colin Farrell isn't the father of those children? Yeah, I don't, he doesn't need to be their parents Two separate satellites Why can't they just be kids? Like a new circus would just have some random weird child labor
[00:45:23] Right? Like random orphans they kind of picked up That's what I was gonna say If it's still the premise of it's two kids and their parents died And now they're just adopted by the circus And they're kind of like You just don't have to deal with it
[00:45:34] The whole idea of the circus is like a weird makeshift family They were like, nutcracker in the four realms flop What can we say from that? Like take the girl Is she in the four realms? No, but the character is like literally the same
[00:45:47] She loves science and her mom gave her a thing Later she's like, oh it was in me all along They must have added that because you know the story of that movie, right? Four realms having two directors? No, I mean, I was initially gonna make it
[00:45:58] But it was just gonna be three realms They added a fourth realm So I guess, I guess, you know that We've talked about this What, that it was originally gonna be three realms and they added a fourth? I can't believe you're gonna remember this
[00:46:08] This is like a whole bit we did on the Star Wars board episode Yeah, I guess I remember You idiot It's one of the greatest bits in the history of blank check Really? Yeah Way in and let us know
[00:46:18] Anyway, so they must have added the stem stuff later That's all I'm saying But it is kind of beautiful when this movie starts I was trying to like dramatically sip I'm sort of out of liquid It is beautiful when this movie starts and it's like
[00:46:31] No, he's doing the opposite thing of what everyone else is doing When remaking a Disney animated classic He's making it arguably more cartoony Like this movie is so colorful Well, his use of CGI has always been so weird
[00:46:46] Where he doesn't use it in the way that anybody else uses it He's just like, I'm gonna make this look as less real as possible And look, do I prefer practical burden? Of course But I think this is the best he's used CGI in the last 10 years
[00:46:59] Because pointedly they shot this whole movie on sound stages They planted grass They built physical sets The stuff that CGI is the sky Right, the whole... What's it called? Dream World or Dream Land? Yeah Which one is it? Dream World, Dream World You know, that's a real set
[00:47:20] Dream Land, I think No, it's Dream World according to Well, no I thought it was Dream Land You know what? Wikipedia has both In the description Colin Farrell was talking in that movie He gave about walking around the set and how insane it was
[00:47:32] You know, yeah, they built it It cost $170 million Yeah, they spend the money for this People on red saying like, how did it cost this much? It's like there's so much money in this movie Even things like when they have that weird
[00:47:43] Like World's Fair exhibit of like the family of tomorrow And it's all the automated robots and like the living room Right And I'm just like, that's a very expensive thing for two shots Right Essentially an in-joke All out How come we don't have that technology?
[00:47:58] Like the family of tomorrow technology? Yeah Like Rue Goldberg, Toast Machines and stuff I mean, that's just a toaster Why aren't we the Jetsons? Yeah I want to wake up and I want like eggs to fly over my head And land on a plate
[00:48:11] Do you folks know Simone Gertz? You must know Simone Gertz who rules Yeah, amazing Is from Sweden? Is that correct? Simone Gertz She's a YouTuber Uh-huh And she makes She does robots? Right, so she makes robots that are kind of things that like
[00:48:26] The Jetsons promised us where it's like a toothbrushing robot Or like a hair washing robot And they just don't work Uh-huh The videos are beautiful because she just dead pans Doing a daily task While like a breakfast machine fucks everything up I mean that's funny
[00:48:41] It's just those machines without precision But I loved like that in the movie And it's just like It's clear like, you know The bad side of Lake Burton is just like They'll offer him anything So he'll sign up to do a movie Because he's like I don't know
[00:48:55] They'll let me do like five shots that I think are funny Right But he did find the kind of In here Um And he even said Uh He did one of those like Vandy Fair Like Breakdown Anatomy of a Scene Or whatever videos with him
[00:49:08] And my girl Colleen Atwood Yep And she was saying I have done movies that are all CGI And I hate it It's really difficult And I don't think they turn out well Tim Yeah Stop You don't have to Well, that's why I think he's like
[00:49:24] I'm getting out of that And he was like It's like impossible You can't like line up a shot You have no focal point And he was like So for this I was like We gotta make as much of this practical as possible So the sky is CGI Right
[00:49:36] Then the Dumbo's CGI Obviously in those elements But like the sets are really real And we built like these massive dome sets I don't hate it I don't either Uh And uh This opening of the film is very colorful Another weird thing as you said
[00:49:50] His use of CGI has been used to like Smooth out people's faces Smooth out everything And desaturate everything To such an insane degree That's all blurry All blurry, all gauzy All like nearly black and white You know with maybe a couple purple Sneaking through
[00:50:06] And then this movie you're like It still looks weird It's still blurry but the colors are there It's a pretty rich vibrant movie It's a vibey And it's It's vibe and great world Different aesthetics That's another thing I like about it Is that like
[00:50:21] The different areas you go to Have different styles I agree You've got the You know what's it where Where Missouri is it again Uh Joplin, Missouri Right Very you know sort of Norman Rockwell You know bright orange fields And all that red And the sun faded paintings
[00:50:40] On the sort of shipping wood Part of all baby All our trains are fun I like the implications Oh train Love an old train Love an opening train Yes me too Just like Casey Jr. with playing the song And doing the like montage
[00:50:52] And I thought all the like Multiple travel mursals Of the acts On the sides Love it And the implication that DeVito's been playing Two guys I need to talk about this He's playing two guys It's insanity though Cause they like They like implying as you're saying
[00:51:06] And then Michael Keaton at one point It's like you've been doing this Cause you've always wanted a brother And then they never bring it back Like never address it I wish they had even more of that Yeah I agree with you I want that made in text
[00:51:16] Like I want a Padme Yes You know a Medalla switcheroo Where halfway through you realize Now there's only one minute Where's the Sabay in this equation Here's the thing Here it is It's not like I need that To be like a big plot point But in the movie
[00:51:30] That's more about Which is when this movie works It's doing this But the movie that's even more About just these humans Relating to Dumbo and reflecting to them I kind of want DeVito to have a scene Where he emotionally opens up to Dumbo And he's like
[00:51:42] We all got an act kid We're all lying We're all pretending We're something we're not He's so committed I gotta tell you the truth It was an incredible movie It was an incredible movie He is so in the pocket In this song
[00:51:53] It's incredible how locked in he is In this film It's a little sad that he kind of disappears You know in the last half You know that's sort of the ideas He's been like subsumed Right But I could what I like where the movie goes
[00:52:07] I like all the insane Tim Burton Talking about how Alison Runderland Ruined his life Yes But if it was mostly just set in Joplin And set in this little circus And it was just like DeVito And like a family trying to like Pull themselves back together
[00:52:22] I might enjoy that too DeVito could have done it That sounds pretty good Yeah I mean it would need to be like 80 minutes long It would need to be like very short I just feel like DeVito You know especially like Post Always Sunny Has become like
[00:52:35] Mostly just a comedic figure of anarchy 100% He's become troll foot guy Right and it's nice to see someone Give DeVito like a chance to play emotions again In a role he could have phoned in Yeah Yeah 100% In those interviews he's been doing Where he's like
[00:52:53] I called up Tim and I said I gotta be in double It's really sweet I gotta be part of this thing Cause I believe you gotta find your feather And he goes on his whole Like existential speech about like We all got our feather
[00:53:05] It's his first film in three years That's not like a voice performance What was the last one before this? In 2016 he's in the Todd Salon's movie Wiener Dog Right And he had a small role In the Taylor Hackford masterpiece The Comedian I believe he plays Robert DeNiro's brother
[00:53:22] I think you're right I've seen that movie and reviewed it It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen I think you're right He's married to Patty Lupin Right Who's the mother This is String Law Who's always like Why you gotta be a comedian huh? Yeah
[00:53:35] Yeah, pain in the ass is what you are You're trying not to tell in jokes full once Geez You're always getting on stage And taking a microphone in your hand And telling jokes into it What's that about? The Comedian of course
[00:53:45] Which is about to be remade as the Joker What if it turns out Todd Phillips the Joker Is like this exact same script as Taylor Hackford's The Comedian Except with Face Paint Having seen The Comedian Which ends with him Well includes a scene where he kills
[00:54:01] Clarice Leachman's character through laughter Pretty twisted Goes viral by doing like a pooping Rap at an old person's home And then has an affair with Leslie Mann I think it'd be great It'd be good Nothing more criminal than that film Yeah, agreed But yes, there's only a chunk
[00:54:22] I mean there is that kind of nice Haunted Colin introduction Of him getting off the train The kids waiting for him Seeing him running towards him And then slowing down as they get closer To the missing arm Right He does make this very bold choice
[00:54:36] To be just a guy who's never coming back Oh boy I do think I know you love Colin I know he's your favorite Get the fuck out Are you gonna criticize him? I'm not I'm gonna say a thing that I think You're gonna be hard pressed
[00:54:53] To disagree with Even if it starts to sound like a criticism I think you're gonna Oh, David's doing such a grouchy face I think you're gonna be hard pressed To disagree with this Okay Go on Colin Farrell Oh god the face is so grouchy
[00:55:09] It's like a real sour lemon face Yeah, it's amazing Colin Farrell C.F. Is exponentially better As a leading man When the budget is below twenty million dollars Of course Or in a bigger budget thing Playing a supporting character Here's the reason for that Yup
[00:55:28] I mean in my opinion The main reason for that Is that Colin is always gonna be A fifth choice For a huge blockbuster For this type of film Exactly As he was here Yeah Who were they trying to get? Casey Affleck
[00:55:40] Casey Affleck would have been a weird idea Will Smith, but Casey Affleck Bill Hader Was someone they really wanted Chris Pine Okay And then eventually we get around to Farrell And Farrell took the role Farrell doesn't do a lot of these movies anymore No
[00:55:55] And said he basically just took the role Because he wanted to work with Tim Burton Which is, I feel like it's still the case For a lot of people who work with Tim Burton Now the Hader one is interesting Because this is the other part of my calculation
[00:56:04] I mean Hader bringing Barry energy Like bringing Haunted Might be good I mean look He is truly one of our finest actors I have contended for a long time Bill Hader is probably one of the 10 best actors of life Okay I truly believe that Sure He's great Yes
[00:56:20] And I think he's certainly shown that he can do A lot more It would have been interesting to see him in this I think the other thing is Tim Burton leading men When you have your sort of generic Leading man character They tend to fall into the background
[00:56:36] Unless they're played by a comedian Or someone with a strong comedic background Yeah But also like Colin Farrell I mean this is such a haunted role His also just Like normally he's like Not interesting to look at Like he should have like the lobster Mustache or glasses
[00:56:53] This should be doing something in thing I was like he's so handsome And she was like he's so handsome It's a little boring Unless he must sees himself I'm furious I'm not saying I agree with this I really like your girlfriend
[00:57:05] But I'm pissed off at her right now I'm not saying I agree with this But it made me go Yeah Like something weird should be occurring Like Jude Law like Dom Hemingway Interesting that movie whatever I mean he blows Chunks all over the screen
[00:57:23] But he's like way more interesting as a leading man Because he looks like a fucking insane And Jude Law Our friend Joe Reed was talking about Jude Law weirdly gets hotter when his hair starts going Jude Law has figured it out and I appreciate that
[00:57:36] I love Jude Law I'm happy that he is in this new zone he's in Sure I do think there's a thing with Colin That he is so perfect looking Like he is such a I mean like that's great I don't agree with you at all
[00:57:52] David just showed us a picture of Colin Farrell And the clown makeup He has the face of someone who's been through A lot of shit Which he has He's got a really worn Leathery quality to him And it's why I love him One of the many reasons
[00:58:05] Fine, delicate I mean handsome boy I mean there's no question Like it looks better on like a Mendelssohn face Like there's already interesting shit going on out of here You're gonna tell Karen to get out of here for finding Ben Mendelssohn more attractive than Colin Farrell
[00:58:19] Stop dissing Colin The brand is so good I still love him I just think in a role like this He works better and it's the same thing It is nowhere near as disastrous But you look at like Asya Butterfield Is that how you say his name?
[00:58:35] I don't know Who knows Asa Bassa Butterfield I think it's Asa Yeah You're like, oh god This film needs someone who is funny Playing this part Because he tends to not know how to connect to But Colin's so funny Like not in this
[00:58:52] But like he's very very funny after That's the thing I agree with you I think he's a cable of being Farrell bosses The Madonna movies He's very good at the sort of like live wire stuff Right And then also the Lanthimos movies
[00:59:03] He's very good at the weird sort of sad sack humor And he's the best part of horrible bosses Yeah, absolutely He is Very good at comedy Of course the greatest comedic performance of the 2000s Bullseye Top of the morning to you There's something going on in that movie
[00:59:17] I would have nominated him for best supporting act Yeah, I love him as Bullseye I mean that movie is horrifying But he is a guy who like unlike someone like Hater Who even when playing someone like Barry Who is very haunted Has an innate comic energy to him
[00:59:32] That you can't knock out of him Whereas Colin Farrell is capable of going just Totally straight Or being totally sinister Or totally romantic I think sometimes he feels a little bored But like yeah, I think you think of him What's it called? Total recall Yes
[00:59:45] You know where it's, I mean that movie is worse than this movie But you know where he's just like What am I doing here And he is a haunted guy So haunted He's best when people let him play that And he's also one of these guys
[00:59:54] We talk about a lot in this podcast A lot of our favorite actors Who are like incredibly handsome men Who are sort of mistaken for leading men But are really character actors He's got that going on, no question Yeah, Colin's big time in that category
[01:00:07] Except he's a great leading man But is he a scum bump? He certainly can be I don't know if I'd classify him as a scum bump No, he for sure has He can be scummy Are you kidding me? Have you seen like True Detective season 2? I had
[01:00:18] Oh, yeah I know He was just pretty scummy But then I just Murdered a child That's true That's all right But I was not considered good Welcome Colin to scumbumry Yeah I mean he was trying to murder a priest And he accidentally murdered a child
[01:00:33] Which is in my opinion a little scummy I think that's scummy technically But that's not like when you say scummy That's not the thing I get what you're saying Aesthetically he's perhaps less scummy But I'm saying like you look at this performance Dom Hemingway is scummy
[01:00:47] We're bringing it back to Dom Hemingway I haven't even seen the movie But the guy looks good on the poster Yeah, he looks great He looks great Richard E. Grant's wearing like Hunter S. Thompson glasses That's great That's perfect There he is I mean he's certainly
[01:01:00] I mean Dom Hemingway is scum Yes, I mean that's the movie The movie is just him being like Like that Yeah, literally Colin Farrell's choice is to play The emotional integrity of this character Which is surprising But like everyone else in this movie is silly Agreed Everyone else
[01:01:21] And he's being handed a character who is a Armless war veteran Whose wife died So you think he should be coming in and being like Hey kids, my bid is hot dogs I love them This is why you shouldn't have the mustache
[01:01:33] It just adds it without having to He needed something Yeah, he needed a little Must kind of This is how Karen eventually Like 20 years from now is like running a studio And like some directors are like You want me to give him a mustache? She's like
[01:01:48] Yeah, I'll give you a green light if he's got a funny mustache 20th century Han Karen is like And then like 20 years later The guy's giving an interview to a journalist She's like Karen Han just wanted a mustache on him for some reason That cost us 100 million
[01:02:01] Karen is also like Agent Smith in the Matrix reloaded Where she starts to infect everyone around her With her viewpoints She hits your chest and you're like I guess I do want more craggle I love Colin Farrell I will defend him to the death
[01:02:16] So I'm just saying as opposed to Keaton Who makes one stunning choice in this movie Which is These movies always have this guy Who is presented as benevolent And then you realize at the end was actually evil all along And you know from the moment the characters introduced
[01:02:31] That he has no narrative function other than to turn out to be evil Right, he's just money He's like a man who is made of money He's big, isn't he? He's just walking money And there's always that section where they're trying to like
[01:02:42] Fake you out that never works And it feels like a waste of time It does And Michael Keaton's He's like let's skip all that Right, exactly He enters the movie and he's like What if I'm evil incarnate What if I take on this character
[01:02:53] Is when he's pretending to be the nice guy He cannot pull it off Everything he does is terrifying Which is incredible And it works with the thing that Burton's locked into In this movie which is just like No, it's just like these are like vampires In show business
[01:03:07] Who just like suck people dry And throw them out Right And then like yell at them for not having enough blood Yes Yes He's so good He's so good He's amazing in this movie Insane In that like anatomy of a scene thing on Vandy Fair
[01:03:24] Atwood and Burton said something Vandy Fair or Van Der Veer VA Van Der Veer I love the triple V's Yeah I love that's not Van Der Veer That it's Van Der Veer The alliteration is good So good Max Medici Vav Yeah
[01:03:39] But we were talking about how weird it is that Keaton is not in much of Batman Returns Which we were like It's a bold storytelling choice Right And I worked on a superhero TV show I'm surprised that I didn't put together until
[01:03:53] They sort of said this in this video I think he was like Hey, I hate wearing that fucking costume Right We're cutting my screen time down to like Not Because they were like Yeah, we like You know, this is our first time working with Michael Since like Batman
[01:04:08] Sure Right More than 25 years Right And he was like You know it was like kind of trying in our relationship That Michael was so uncomfortable in the costume So when he signed on for this He had like extensive costume notes that were all about comfort Wow
[01:04:22] So even the things like him having the sort of The ass cut Right He was like, I don't want to wear a tie Ties make me uncomfortable Jesus Michael He's like wearing like loafers the whole film Two years back in the spotlight And he's giving costume notes
[01:04:36] Well, he said this in an interview too He was showing about the wig He was like, I hate wearing wigs I didn't want to do it I didn't want to do it I don't want to do it And then like
[01:04:43] He was the one who when he was talking to Tim He was like Should I have a wig? Right, I know what this guy's hair is But also a beautiful choice to make it A character who wears a shitty wig Right
[01:04:53] So like the wig never even attempts to look real It looks great Right, the longer the movie goes on They without ever making it a total gag Just like make it more and more skewed Like it never flies off It's just weird Right
[01:05:05] I'm just looking at him right now I mean you have a movie that is constructed So that the villain is going to bring about his own demise By like ridiculously like setting the whole place on fire Right And like that is nominally
[01:05:17] Like that's I mean that's just stupid Why would he do that? But Keaton has done such a good job Playing himself as basically like a ball of lightning As a person Business Beetlejuice Business Beetlejuice Yeah As Karen said Like that you're like
[01:05:32] Yeah, he probably would just like throw the switches Even though everyone's like Don't do that You know because he's not of this world Because he feels Satanic in this movie Yes, yes, yes He is Mephisto I would watch an entire movie of just this character 100%
[01:05:46] I would watch a whole movie of this guy trying to like Take over Wall Street Doing it And then causing the Great Depression You know what I mean? Like I watch that movie Yeah Where he comes in, teaches them things And everything goes up
[01:06:00] And then it all crashes down And he like jumps out of a window I mean that's That sounds glorious Exactly I was very surprised he didn't It wasn't and Michael Keaton Is it And DeVito? There's no and And this feels like a movie that's begging for an and
[01:06:15] And he really is the shiny and part Because it takes a while for him to enter Do you think it's an and competition Where it's like DeVito, Arkin and Hammer All potential ands on any project That's why I'm bad so they were like none of you
[01:06:28] So they were like forget it No and Right, I think so Instead he's second bill I know which is kind of surprising But he is kind of a bigger deal than DeVito or Green these days He really is kind of the second lead of this movie
[01:06:40] I would agree He arguably might have the same amount of screen time As Colin Farrell He also has a better Maybe He's more compelling Yeah he's so good in this I just like how sort of Unnately this guy While being kind of a Rapscallion
[01:06:57] Believes in like the magic of the circus Like weirdly one of those performances where I'm watching And I'm like Danny DeVito like should be a romantic lead He's pretty romantic in this He's very romantic You're right he doesn't really have like a That arc A lady
[01:07:16] Or a man But like he should So talking about the self commentary Burton thing Right, I feel like the DeVito character He is using to sort of express a Roger Corman s Of course Remember when we all right We're kind of like
[01:07:33] Everything was falling apart all the time All in it together Right There were monkeys in the drawers But who cares But also that Corman thing of like he was a businessman And he was ruthless and it was all about the numbers
[01:07:45] But there was weirdly some heart in it Yeah and he kind of loved us all He loved his weirdos and he was like I want you to do better than me and like Find a path out of here And it's like the stuff that
[01:07:56] Burton grew up loving is like this genuine Trash Trash that wasn't crassly designed That had some heart in it that was made by This kind of circus energy of You know the outskirts of show business Where it's like people coming together And going to a haunted mansion
[01:08:11] Yeah it's very earnest And gluing some shit to someone's face Sure And trying to make a monster movie in five days And then Keaton kind of represents Walt Disney For sure he represents Yeah he'd 100% as Disney The only reason I want to say he represents
[01:08:24] Only kind of Walt Disney is because He represents half Walt Disney and half The 2019 Walt Disney Company Exactly Because so much of his hostile takeover Of the Medici Brothers Circus Feels like the Fox takeover That's literally what that is Yeah with everyone else getting kicked out
[01:08:38] We love the history of Fox We love it By the way we're only going to make two Fox films a year and all of you were fired This is your office right here for all of Fox and that's that Right We'll tell you
[01:08:48] By the way you have to fire everyone Right That whole thing On the deal does Murdoch He was just like a one time he got All that money Correct He sold the studio The film studio Right but it's essentially though Disney gave like that guy So much
[01:09:04] So much money You ever really connect that dot Right Until really like thinking about it now But sorry to No no I'll take this I mean they gave him the money That he would have made I understand I know But it's just one evil motherfucker Oh yeah RMS
[01:09:19] Yeah Yeah And it's one of those things too Where you're like Well okay so like you give him the money Now he doesn't have as much influence Over art so that's maybe better For society But you're also making him richer But he also still has control over
[01:09:35] Fox News and News Corp The stuff that he can use to cause his most damage He recently fell down and almost died Cause he's very old Right And I think that was part of that thing of like Enough And his sons who are fighting over it
[01:09:50] Are just like we don't want to run all of this stuff Right They're like Fox News is his thing that he fucking wants And won't let us drop Well one The couple things were interesting One of the sons wants Fox News Oh and the other one does
[01:10:00] The other one doesn't get rid of it Right There's one liberal son Right James was supposed to join Disney and did it Yes Because it turned out Disney were kind of like Ehh Like it's all The times had a whole Anyway
[01:10:12] No I do want to say this though Not until I open up a whole can of worms But obviously the last couple years There's been a lot of conversation about like Who are you supporting by paying your tickets For this thing Yeah These artists work with these people
[01:10:23] And this and that And it is very weird how just like A 20th Century Fox News Corp Like never came into question of like Should you be making movies for Fox Sure That are ostensibly funding Fox News Yeah but they weren't really They were divided companies always
[01:10:40] No and I'm not saying that like But yeah you know At least we've won It's just weird that Involve evil That never really happened There was the one moment where Fox News started sort of like There was a call to violence
[01:10:52] And then like a couple of Fox TV people were like Like Seth MacFarlane Like a few people were like They were like I'm gonna end my overall deal When it naturally expires Four years from now Right I think Fye did the same thing
[01:11:04] Which now he's just left Fox totally He left Right but a lot of them were like I will leave as soon as my deal is done He could go into outer space That wouldn't matter for him Yes It is just a weird It's a weird thing
[01:11:15] I mean that's the thing Like right It's you know A v of Ander-Vehr is maybe Like the Walt Disney Corporation As run by Rupert Murdoch Like he's maybe closer to Murdoch In temperamental personality Sure but he's got a bit of a Disney look You know
[01:11:30] And it's sort of just that idea Of like the way he enters from the car Yeah It's like wow this like magic man And then he keeps selling There's nothing like him right He's like evil wonk right now He's made me a child again
[01:11:43] Like how sinister everything sounds Wait a second aren't you an adult Like why are you talking like this Why do you want a dream world Like all the words for questions That come up from that We're in borderline lisp And then he like very weird affectations
[01:11:56] When he's talking Very weird affectations And the notion that so much of it Is like a persona he's creating To like sell this sort of Like the whole company line of wonder But then the others I mean it reminds me a little bit Of like when Michael Eisner
[01:12:11] Tried to make himself Uncle Walt And would like introduce all the things He was like nothing's more magical To me than thinker bell And he just never like He had such a heavy head He was a studio guy Not all of us can be Reggie
[01:12:26] When Tom Hanks played Walt Disney in a movie I think he was really good in that movie It's a weird movie It's about to be Mr. Rogers too That's fine I mean to that He's got that energy Disney wasn't like that No he wasn't Yeah
[01:12:41] Disney was like a chain smoking maniac Who was like draw a faster Okay I'm gonna build a city under the ground Have we already talked about Whether we think his head has been Cryogenically frozen It's just out there That's made up right Isn't that made up
[01:12:59] Yeah but like Why would you cryogenically freeze ahead Can I throw out my hottest take Because at that time people didn't know What they were doing Where is now They're like it'll work Yeah it'll work Marvis Trisand has cloned dogs It's fine I think he did it
[01:13:12] And after 15 years They were like this thing's like rotting Let's just like throw it out I think they tried it And it didn't work at all And they just gave up on This rumor began in a print article In E.C. Paris That has been largely distributed
[01:13:27] To Disney executives who hated Walt Disney Trying to humiliate Ooh la la And his daughter was like I don't think my dad knew what cryonics Were when he died Like she wasn't even like This is ridiculous No he would never do that And it would definitely never be
[01:13:44] In like a chamber in Orlando Like she's just like What? How great would it be though If like he played it really close to the vest And like eight years from now When Bob Iger steps down He's like I'm very proud to announce My successor Mechelette
[01:14:02] Or it's like he's like a Zordon Where like his head's in a tube Yeah for sure And he's like Disney's IP portfolio Is stronger than ever You have to explain him Like what Spider-Man is Now the other thing I think is really interesting
[01:14:18] Oh you have to show him The new like Mickey Mouse animated Weird comics too Anyway Oh yeah I think those are good No they're really good Yeah I'm thinking something They're new Mickey Mouse cartoons That are actually funny They're really cool Where you watch them and you're like
[01:14:31] Oh right this used to be Like a comedic character Who had a personality That's the thing people forget About Mickey Mouse Yeah He wasn't introduced as a mascot It was a cartoon about a funny mouse Yeah here's what's crazy They have these new cartoons
[01:14:43] That have this very weird Specific art style It's like adventure time but mean Yes and Mickey is kind of A little stinker Yep Like the way Disney had like Sanded off all of his personality Because they were like He just needs to sell beach cows
[01:14:57] Now there are things where he Like is like petty Yeah And he like tries to trick Donald That's like angry at goofy I feel like that's right That when we once we were kids He just didn't have a personnel That was a horrible kid He's just an idiot
[01:15:10] Right he was just boring And now he's like Donald I swear to God Are you auditioning to be the new Mickey? Maybe it's like it's Chris D'Amantopoulos or whatever his name is Man of a thousand voices What I want to say is
[01:15:25] The other shading to the Michael Keaton character Which gets to the other Main live action performance We have to talk about here Is the weird implication That he has never had sex with Eva Green But once everyone does think he has Yeah
[01:15:37] And by choice is not interested in her sexually But wants to perpetuate the notion That they are lovers I didn't read that I thought it meant that He just has multiple like mistresses But she says to him Cause Colin Farrell's like Must be nice to your boyfriend
[01:15:54] She's like that's we are not that at all Yeah I'm just like one of his girlfriends That's how I used to She said I'm one of like the rings The jewels he wears to reflect Light back onto him Which I took as Like a trophy and arm girl
[01:16:09] Here's the thing But I think the full extent of that relationship Is the trophy Here's the thing we can all agree on Cause you get the sense that once they're out of public They just like go completely separate And here's the thing we can all agree on
[01:16:20] Kids love this stuff What we're talking about right now When kids are watching the movie They're like yeah what is going on That ring line is really evocative Right But that's where like the weird Burton stuff comes in
[01:16:33] And it's the other thing that like now it's crystallized to me What's kinda cool about Eva Green in these Burton films And like Peregrine suffers from Not having her for most of the movie Dark Shadows I was in a very bad movie when we recorded the episode
[01:16:45] And I wish I defended her performance a little more I don't think any of us were mean to her though We were all just sort of like Yeah she's doing an Eva Green thing That character sucks Agreed But I think she's a lot of fun in that movie
[01:16:56] She's great That character sucks She is a great screen presence She's wonderful I highly enjoy her I wish she was not in the zone she's in Where she just doesn't get to do anything good Agreed I do think She did Casino Royale and then it was just
[01:17:10] I mean she's incredible That's one of the great performances Yeah she's amazing It's unbelievable In this what I found really interesting is After two Burton films where he casts her as Some variations on a witch In this she does not play a witch Interesting
[01:17:25] And it reminds me a little bit Of your beloved Christelle Vaults In Alita Battle Angel We're getting into Alita talk Right I think she's got a similar thing going on This because there is something innately Weird and menacing about Eva Green Right And she has this She's sad
[01:17:43] Weaponized sexuality She always makes sexuality scary Which I like that because she does that She doesn't have a rocket hammer though She doesn't I like that because she does that She is maybe the only actor In the Burton canon outside of Pfeiffer as Catwoman
[01:17:59] Who successfully smuggles sexuality into a Timberkirch film We don't think DeVito Penguin I mean he fucks He cries I love boobies Yeah But I just like this movie revealing her At the start you're just like Oh this is some weird gothic ice queen character This unapproachable arms length
[01:18:23] And then you get to the back hallways And she shows up in her weird gym workout harness Like her gothic harness I love that And she's like look I'm a performer We're all just like doing our bits They want me to ride the elephant I'll ride the elephant
[01:18:36] Right we don't have any relationship I'm just some street performer from Paris Like let's get down to work I love that scene I think it's one of the best scenes in the movie I think she's really good in this The Dumbo training scene
[01:18:47] That they're doing with the net Right and I Karen's making her face I like her weird uncomfortable kindness in this movie That she is a fully decent character Who isn't super adept at experiencing Kindness I think it's flirty That thing where Colin's like
[01:19:01] Oh you're not all dolled up anymore And she's like Fuck you And there's a lot of sparks flying Well we know you just love bossy girls Karen's got my number She's right I love a bossy girl Bossy round face Bossy round face Bossy round face
[01:19:21] It's a thing my friend said to me many years ago When I was in a theater with her And there was a trailer for I think short term 12 One of the three largest movies The earlier one And I was like I have a crush on her
[01:19:31] And she was like Yeah she's got round face And I was like what? And she was like You always like bossy round faces I know everyone else has already Meamed this some weeks back But god What an incredible fucking casting job On that movie Yeah
[01:19:46] Wait on which movie Short term 12 Oh of course I rewatched it That movie is just good That movie still rules Incredible Fucking part I just want to point out that I had Caitlyn Devere and Keith Stamphill And my Oscar ballad Same year Same year
[01:20:00] And I had Brie Larson I had three of the four acting categories Brie Brie's my winner Yeah I think LaKeith was my winner that year You might be Let me let's look at the old spreadsheet For Davey This is my new favorite segment
[01:20:11] I think I lost my rich text doc Because it was back on my windows day Anyway my point is I thought I love Eva Green I think she's boring in this movie And I also think that scene with Colin Is boring And she's just dumb
[01:20:24] And I didn't like it I liked it but I also admit I might just be in the bag for The second they're on screen together I'm like Yeah those are two people I would like to watch Hevsex Okay sure And I'm no prevert But occasionally you see
[01:20:35] Two nice A prevert I'm no prevert But occasionally you see Two nice looking movie stars In a movie and you go like Yeah I would be into that And the two of them With their like sort of like Bruised, like smoky Like sad sexuality I'm just like
[01:20:50] Yeah give me those Those two I think they're great Raven-haired beauties I don't think she's boring I think she's I think she's really Interesting And I like that she is Very kind in this It's the same thing As like the Alita thing Where Christoph is like just dad
[01:21:05] She's similarly Not trying to play Against her innate energy She's imbuing it with a lot Of other things that no one else Has let her color Around the weirdness I think this, like I get what you mean But I like think it'd be better
[01:21:19] Served by the version of Dumb-o that you're kind of describing earlier I agree with you 100% Yeah, sure And at that point maybe I was really locking into like Each character What they were doing on their own Yeah And like how would they react
[01:21:31] In a scene just with Dumb-o When they're talking to other humans I'm a little less into the movie The dialogue borders on horrible 45% of the time Yeah, yeah And a lot of the human Stuff feels indifferent Yeah Until you get to those moments
[01:21:47] Where the character sort of says They're like mantra You know, in the way where Burton's like Oh, that's the thing That's what they're about Right, the difference between these people These weird broken people Were compelled to do their weird thing Whether or not there's an audience
[01:22:00] And only know how to like Relate to other weird broken people And the people who just see those people As dollar signs Yeah And anytime it's in that sort of dialogue You know The movie I think is really humming Anytime you're just on Dumb-o Yeah
[01:22:15] The movie is really humming Dumb-o's a good sweet boy He's a good boy I think that he's great Another thing we should talk about Is that anytime the Dumb-o flies in this movie It's amazing I cry Tears from my eyes Yeah And I think partly it's the Pavilion
[01:22:31] Like I loved the Dumb-o I'm getting chills just thinking about it right now Yeah It's great And it's shot so well when he just like Swoops through the entire time It's amazing I think that trailer is underrated Is one of the great trailers Of recent times
[01:22:44] That ends with Davito going Whoa Like as he flies over This sort of short trailer I think it's a beautiful teaser Yeah I think it's so good But anytime he flies I also just think that if Dumb-o flies Cry tears from my eyes
[01:22:55] I cry tears from my eyes Yeah But like I'm trying What's like the most incongruous movie Like you could Fucking drag to cross concrete Dumb-o like flew in the middle of that movie I'd probably be like Oh look at Dumb-o go Like
[01:23:10] And that's another thing where it's like You put the genie and CGI And you start to get all these questions Of physics that work against the character Right But when you have a real kind of Semi-tangible looking element Agreed And it starts flying It goes like It's great
[01:23:28] The original Dumb-o is better But the flying in this is more visceral And more emotional He feels heavier when he takes off He feels so fucking heavy Yeah Right The original Dumb-o is better Except for the crows The crows Which is rough Yeah Snow good Snow good
[01:23:45] But you know Snow good It's an 80 year old movie The other thing that's fascinating about Dumb-o That I feel like has been discussed And I think I talked about in my review Is that like That movie was made when Disney had no money
[01:23:54] They had some call this money into Fantasia And it hadn't worked That was the budget sort of program They were essentially We need to make something cheap and fast Yeah That will float us It was the only one of the first Five Disney films to like
[01:24:08] Make a profit upon release Right Because it was so fucking expensive To make an animated movie Yeah And this was the one right after Fantasia Right That's what I'm saying Fantasia was Yes, Fantasia was the one they sunk all the money into My sweet baby Fantasia Yes
[01:24:20] And Fantasia was obviously So good Masterpiece Right And I'm glad they made it Yes And I think it probably eventually turned to profit But the whole Oh yeah The re-release model comes out of like I gotta figure out a way to make these movies Going to the green
[01:24:34] Well that but also videos didn't exist I mean you know Sure But it's crazy to think about that Disney That sort of lean, cheap Disney Right Versus this B. Hamoth That made this movie that is going to be a bomb Yes It did okay Right
[01:24:52] It had like a 70% drop in the second movie It had a big drop Which is crazy for a kids movie Yeah But this isn't a kids movie Yeah I mean I think they're realizing now That outside of the initial Sort of like a novelty factor
[01:25:04] Of the first couple Right These live action Disney's kind of need to be In the renaissance era Yeah In order to really make Ben That's where the nostalgia is The nostalgia buttons aren't as hard For the generation that would now be taking their kids To send
[01:25:18] Maybe they were like sort of By like Maleficent doing well But like that's an Angelina Jolie thing Right You know That's a Charlotow thing Thank you so much Yeah Talk about another very weird performance So much Even by his standards Even by his standards Good
[01:25:35] I really like him in that movie I'm sorry I mean that's a very carrot opinion Yeah I'll say this Charlotow made my best supporting actor For the A-Team I think he Yeah Rules in that movie No he's good And I find that movie to largely be It's bad
[01:25:52] A disappointment I don't even think of that movie as like A disaster It's just boring Yeah I agree Right I think he's so good in it Well because he goes like Full weird Maybe if we put a Patreon one day We can do like a blankies episode
[01:26:03] For a yesteryear You know what I mean Oh that would be kind of fun You know we like a 2002 blankie Right We pull up our old files Yeah That'd be fun Yeah cause I definitely have some weird I mean I've implied a couple of them Exactly
[01:26:17] Call us Erlendare devil You can look back Call me in the A-Team Yeah Alright Charlotow's good His career is gone though Yeah But that's like His career has gone Yeah Disappeared Didn't go south it just went That is the weird snake It went hardcore Henry The what
[01:26:33] It went hardcore Henry He's very good in hardcore Henry Yeah What Have you seen that movie? No He's very good I kind of liked him in Free Fire Which is another movie Well he's always good Never saw Free Fire Especially when he's allowed to be like Mean Sure
[01:26:47] Cause he has such a Specific sharp face And a specific sharp energy Whenever he's allowed to use that It's great He looks like a snake Oh it's amazing He's a human snake man I love him Also Free Fire Amazing Cast Horrible movie Very bad movie Very bad
[01:27:01] It's not good Noah Taylor is in it And it's bad And only Karen would say that As if we're like Noah Taylor I mean I like the guy They got the raw sex appeal of Noah Taylor Yeah All 75 pounds of Noah Taylor
[01:27:13] I just think Ben Wheatley is one of those You know he's What's he doing? He's got a lot of skill but What's he doing? I don't like him Was he supposed to do a DC movie? Was he going to do Deathstroke No No no no no
[01:27:27] One of those He does weird movies where Like someone gets run over by Attracted trailer or whatever I liked Field in England I believe he was supposed to make a DC movie Was Joe Manginoa playing Deathstroke Was that the one he was playing? Yeah
[01:27:39] I think he was supposed to make a Deathstroke movie I'm gonna look it up right now What I was gonna say is The weird thing about this movie Is that It is kind of the snake eating its own tail Because you can go like
[01:27:52] It's insane that they took this like Little Disney Let's Keep It Small And Simple Movie And blew it up into a $170 million Temple film Right That movie also because they hired Tim Burton to do it Gareth Evans was gonna make it Oh okay
[01:28:09] Because they hired Tim Burton to do it Then becomes about how these things Get corrupted by getting overblown Right You know Yeah I know Like I would be against making a $170 million Dumb-o Unless it is what they did Which is a movie about how you should
[01:28:28] Never make a $170 million Dumb-o In general I have no objection to that Yeah If I'm running Disney I might have some questions You wouldn't let me run Disney Okay Karen Thank you so much Okay let's do it I appreciate it I'd like to say something Wait a second
[01:28:48] I'm sorry Eddie Marsden cast as Ariel and Little Mermaid I'm just getting a bunch of Disney news breaks right now Mike Lee to direct the Aristocats Oh Jesus like what's one of your truly fucking depressed ones What's one of those bug nuts Exactly I don't know
[01:29:14] What's the clip that your original KB video ends with The military clip that's all the old men mark Oh it's from Bednobs and Broomsticks I just thought it'd be funny Like I don't know any of those actors It would be true David Tomlinson David Tomlinson is up there
[01:29:27] He's great Yeah He's fucking great Who if you remade Bednobs and Broomsticks Who would your Tomlinson be I would resurrect him from the grave I guess you're like Paul Sparks or someone where you're like I guess I know who that is
[01:29:38] And Karen's like one of the five best actors alive It's true he is He's great I would give Jeff Jeff Nichols Bednobs and Broomsticks I don't know Like Paul Sparks is too innately scary I feel like He doesn't have enough charming energy
[01:29:55] I feel like that's true of 80% of Karen's boys Yeah okay It's a little bit of scary and I mean the Hugo weavings of the world I was just going to say what if I cast Hugo weavings And the Bednobs and Broomsticks Have I told you
[01:30:07] I told Karen this But on set when we were filming season two I showed Brendan Hines who plays Superian Because he was telling me I think I can say this When we were filming Yes He was subletting his apartment to Ben Mendelssohn Wow
[01:30:23] So then we were like nerding out on Mendelssohn In LA like because he lives in LA Right so he was here for filming Mendelssohn was staying at his apartment Yeah And I was like oh my god that guy's the fucking best And he was like this and that
[01:30:36] And I was like I got this friend Who like Ben Mendelssohn is like her Brad Pitt Like he's like the apex And then he was like who's this friend So I showed him the KB video And then Brendan got very insecure about the fact
[01:30:49] That he might be too conventionally handsome to be a KB But that's his lane isn't it He's the guy who can play your Superman type Right And he was like I could be one of these guys Probably He's getting older He probably could He's got salt and pepper
[01:31:07] Exactly He wants to move towards that But then he kept on sending me follow up texts About like what about this person Really? Did they count? Yeah That's really funny He has a lot of follow up questions This is the sweetest thing I've ever heard
[01:31:21] It's very into it Yeah It's extremely sweet But I would kind of qualify right Like Yeah when this house we love and appreciate Brendan and I Sure he's a good one Yeah he's great He's a great one Doesn't listen to the show Why not? What an asshole
[01:31:37] I hate him I've turned I hope he started listening to the show on this episode That would be really funny Yeah I like screamed when you told me that story Right Karen said tell my love him on the middleman I said I could have auto predictive text
[01:31:51] Fucking love the middleman Your response Yeah Middleman rules Yeah What other things we want to talk about I'm sorry what? I know her a little bit We should get her on Who are we talking about? Nally Morales Yeah Can we talk about those bad elephant boys? Yeah
[01:32:07] No good You tweeted That sans context and people were very confused I know And I stand by the Who you're talking about We were discussing this prior to you guys arriving Because I was on time Who gets stomped to death It's fair He's served it
[01:32:22] I was slayed for reasons that are under embargo I like the value being expressed in this movie Is if you're mean to animals You deserve to die Yeah he dies And you got what he deserved There's like a strangely high number of deaths in this movie
[01:32:36] And always like in extremely unpleasant ways Also true Yeah Do truth things Lesson learned Lesson learned He shouldn't have been mean to Dumbo Or Mama Jumbo Or Mrs. Jumbo Mrs. Jumbo Right Michael Phillips was talking about How this movie has the like challenge of trying to make
[01:32:57] Even though they said it even earlier than the original film Right Like making this film in a modern era where like every circus has shut down And the circus that still exists are like Yeah we're done with animal stuff, everyone hates that Yeah And it's like innately cruel
[01:33:12] There's no way to avoid the cruelty Right And like Dumbo is innately sort of a story about animal cruelty Yeah and it has this ending where they're like In a free circus Right You're like oh Right It kind of comes out of no
[01:33:25] It becomes him doing like a used car salesman pitch Straight to camera Yeah About how they like don't fuck with cruelty anymore I think that's good though for kids Me too I've gotten no beef with it It's not really layered in that hard But yeah it's fine Yeah
[01:33:39] And I like Dumbo going back to Asia And flying among the elephants I mean I love that That made me cry I mean you know It was really sweet but it was also kind of like What? I was afraid that Mowgli was going to show Oh my God
[01:33:52] I know the timelines don't totally matter Right But I was afraid that Because it looked like they just took the assets from Jungle Book Yeah Maybe that's just what they did Very possible Yeah it does look like that Yeah The ending is weird
[01:34:05] At least Jungle Book is clean How do they get the elephants back there? Who had the money to do that? Wait you're looking for plausibility? The guy had his friend And they were taking him back to Calcutta Or something Oh okay Yeah And I like that
[01:34:21] I know we haven't really gone through the plot that much There's like an electrified circus city in this Yeah I love it I love all that The second you get into like Dream World is good Dream World is great What do we think of the pink elephant sequence?
[01:34:35] That Yeah not a fan of that Weird I kind of like that because I like that it's just Dumbo going like Weird No I fucking love the cutbacks to Dumbo's face Where he's just sort of watching it not like Apparently it's like No
[01:34:49] Just a weird thing that happens in Dream Land No you like Dream Land Dumbo's such a good kid He's a good kid He's so sweet He's a good kid He's a good kid He's a good kid Yeah he's good Jesus
[01:35:00] But here's the other thing we haven't talked about Okay We gotta talk about Arka Okay We gotta do This is the first Arka You gotta give him a Burton collaboration since Edward Suzanne's right? There's no Right for which he won the Nobel Prize Correct Correctly
[01:35:14] The Nobel Prize is given up for best supporting actor Right In this movie the daughter wins the Nobel Prize for chemistry Oh my God No Wanna see that elephant fly Well this is a disaster He comes in and we have the presumption that Michael Keaton is the money
[01:35:28] Yeah And then he comes into the movie late and you're like Oh Here's Alan Arkin Oscar winner We know him And he's like I'm back rolling this You're like Does the circus not make money? Like why do we need this character? Yeah
[01:35:42] There's no purpose except to say this is a disaster Yep With in a monotone You got no act Right So it's not a flying elephant He's an escape artist It's great Right I mean it's terrible I love every second of it It is terrible I don't care
[01:35:58] Like you know what I mean? Three wrinkly gray boys Yeah it's my ideal movie One of those performances where I'm like if someone was like Yes but don't you see that on paper like He's not giving any effort He's not reading I'd be like Yeah no I understand
[01:36:09] I understand I think he's very good Alan Arkand falls into that Tommy Lee Jones category Sure Where if he hates the movie Even if he's hostile to the movie It's still a great performance Because you want him to be hostile Exactly
[01:36:22] In the same way Alan Arkand always seems above it And over the thing he's doing Right So either he's locked in He's doing it well Or he doesn't like the script Right And he is doing it well What is Tommy Lee up to right now?
[01:36:34] Well he's gonna be an ad astro If it ever fucking comes out Shit that's right In which he went to Neptune And Brad Pitt has to go get him Yeah The perfect movie plot Yeah You're right Like that is the perfect movie plot
[01:36:47] God as Alan's just gonna fucking rule Or it will knock him off I think it's gonna be so good No it's gonna come out eventually One hopes Yeah James James Gray The only, I love him The only other thing that he is in coming up
[01:37:00] Is something called Arctic Justice Colon Thunder Squad Wait a second Wait a second Wait a second I just got a news flash on Deadline Disney announces Tommy Lee Jones to play Bambi You're welcome Directed by the Dardan Brothers I mean the Dardan Brothers would handle
[01:37:21] The lessons of Bambi The world is cruel Right And man is evil Right it's Dumbo going from tree stump to tree stump Begging people to not kill his Oh my god Just in full Tommy Lee voice Arctic Jungle Arctic Justice Thunder Squad is an animated film
[01:37:42] Starring Jeremy Renner as an Arctic Fox Oh I ain't got a fault No stop reading Tommy Lee Jones is a clear stop Is stop playing ok fine Yeah I don't know Sorry I over rolled must demand more Ok Tommy Lee Jones is credited as playing
[01:37:55] And I want to double check this Because Wikipedia can be a little He's not on IMDB Is this like a weird Independently financed By like a Russian animation And it seems to be a norm of the forest It's called Arctic Justice Thunder Squad
[01:38:12] Ok I'm going to look it up more So you don't have to listen to David Sayed Allah Because I see it's physically hurting you That's all true Ok so we're done with Dumbo Is that it? We agree that it's insane And it's about how capitalism overruns
[01:38:25] Any sort of unique product Until it spoils it and requires a cleansing It's just a massive irony That it's a Disney movie And that this is the message And yet it's such a It's like at war with itself Like half of it is this anti capitalist message
[01:38:41] And the other half is like Here's every other Disney movie you've seen Just sort of put in a blender Well and that scene where like Michael Keaton Is like trying to sell DeVito out in like the fields Yeah that's so good Right and he's doing the like
[01:38:55] Look I can give you everything Like it's the argument that agents make When they try to convince their like Artists to sign up for a $200 million temple It's like you're gonna get such a big canvas to play with If you do this right
[01:39:08] You have all the money in the world And then the next thing you do could be whatever you want It definitely won't be Dumbo 2 And then the answer is they like Don't put out the net you know Like it's like they give you everything
[01:39:19] But that's one of the scenes I mean there are a couple things Like that scene is great The first sort of tour of Dreamland or Dreamworld Or Underland or whatever it's called Where you see like the weird sort of like Forbidden Planet space station with all the levers
[01:39:35] Where they're all wearing their matching uniform I will say it's interesting that Dumbo does the Futterwacket in this movie It is Stop it right now Yeah it is a little weird But all that stuff like the weird like mechanical Like it feels like some like Communist factory line
[01:39:51] Like it feels like Metropolis or something Where they're all like in these towers Or like in these Moloch Right right with these like adding machines And they're all wearing these like silver jumpsuits Like the just you understand Like this scariness to Tim Burton Of these like corporate behemoths
[01:40:10] Who are like we love Wonder Right right But the guy saying it is like You know we love Wonder around here Now sit in your fucking box And come up with some weird shit You know it's like he's finally Maybe starting to figure out
[01:40:26] Where he kind of got lost in the woods Yeah We have done this miniseries Wildly out of order For a number of reasons One is because it took five fucking months And we had certain guests available at certain times And this and that and what happened
[01:40:39] All true all true And so people have been saying I feel like they haven't come up with this clean and arc For this guy Sure You know and I'm waiting for like the real sort of Hypothesis Here comes Dumbo Theory right that pulls it all together
[01:40:52] And Dumbo does start to bring the thing Into sort of focus a little bit But I will admit the reason why I've been pushing For Burton for so long And your resistance was Is it gonna be like ten great movies And then ten weeks of you trying
[01:41:06] Of you being like well there's something here Me being like is there Right Right And my hope was If we watch them all And we do them all in order Sure I'm gonna figure out how to crystallize the thing I'm gonna either figure out conclusively What went wrong
[01:41:20] Or I'm going to be able to figure out An argument for why he never went wrong And all the stuff is still good And I feel like I couldn't do Either I don't think that us doing it out of order Is the only culprit
[01:41:33] No I'm just saying that's an element The last batch is just sort of a mess That's an element But I've seen a lot of things that people have said online And there's so many texts that are so good Like in our Reddit community They're good boys
[01:41:44] And someone saying like Like he's good it's good I think a big problem with Burton Is like the death Of screenwriting standards In the studio system That when these things are so pre-packaged And pre-sold And you have people who go like You don't understand it doesn't matter
[01:41:58] It doesn't matter what happens in the fucking thing I just need five images to sell in a trailer For a guy who admittedly is like I don't have the best innate story sense He's probably better when he's teamed with A really strong writer And really strong producers
[01:42:11] Who like hold his feet to the fire And when a guy like this becomes this powerful And becomes this big of a brand name And they just go we can sell it off of you Then no one's really testing him And it's like the prison of choice
[01:42:22] Where if he's allowed to do anything The technology exists for him to do anything No one's noting his script It actually becomes somewhat of a hindrance Which is sort of the you know the dumbo Look you got everything but now there's no net
[01:42:34] And you have a really really high Height to fall from right There's that kind of thing We've tried to psychoanalyze him a bunch of times You know it's hard He's pretty opaque Right it's hard But in this movie About its own life
[01:42:49] You get the sense of him going like Look I genuinely have no fucking idea And the thing that really clicked for me In this whole miniseries was re-watching Edward a movie for the fucking 25th time It's one of my five favorite movies ever
[01:43:02] For the first time I saw it as Autobiography Not as a movie about The types of movies he loves Right But a movie of him just saying like I have no idea why I'm successful and this guy Wasn't Yeah yeah yeah And I do think
[01:43:17] You know there's a degree I mean Ben saying like I want this guy spaced There's no saving him It's just like sometimes people Just kind of are They line up with a pocket In culture Sure Right the technology is in the right place
[01:43:33] And the culture is in the right place And they get to verbalize something before anyone else Does and somehow it connects And they get their dumbo run Where you get to like fly around Like a weird big-eared elephant Right And those things kind of can't last
[01:43:47] There are certain people we've talked about People like M Knight who went like Very pointedly astray Yeah And then was able to analyze what he was doing wrong And course correct Right And Burns kind of a guy who's just like Give me a feather I'm gonna try something
[01:44:01] Who doesn't have that level of introspection I like the feather I love the feather He doesn't need it though No He can fly good without it Right So you know I don't know if there's a set He just loves them boy Well we all love them
[01:44:14] I don't know if there's a set answer If it's like oh he needs to do original material Or he needs to do things that are this Or this budget level Or in this genre Or whatever it is But it does feel like
[01:44:23] For the first time watching this movie I'm like this is kind of a new in Because the I'm just an outsider Innocent In a world that doesn't get me movies Mm-hmm Feel less and less sincere coming from him Right But the movie is where he can start to
[01:44:41] Explain how the system takes advantage Might be interesting Not the fear of the outsider No I know I get what you're saying But the commodification feels like This is a way that he could Evolve But the fear is this movie's not doing well Right
[01:44:55] Is he gonna retreat in some way Who knows I don't know maybe he won't get to make a movie this big For a while that might be good for him Because he's certainly a reactive filmmaker He feels like a guy who takes his loss as hard Yeah
[01:45:07] Especially in a way that makes sense for someone Who had so much success out of the gate Yeah He's not really accustomed to dealing with rejection Sure And so when he does in any way He just sort of like folds into himself Right
[01:45:20] But I remember a big thing that this podcast comes out of And the whole blank check term Which is something my dad used to use all the time When someone had a big success and he Your dad named this podcast like inadvertently Right
[01:45:32] I mean James pitched it because he knew that was the term That we both knew My dad using him just like man That guy's gonna have a real blank check on his next movie And my dad would always say especially with people I love
[01:45:40] To be like I think that guy's just lost the plot And I would always get so angry Because I'd be like that's impossible Someone who was capable of making something this good Can't lose the plot We have to like much like Nico Parker
[01:45:52] I was the little kid being like We have to use science to break down what went wrong here And explain it You're explaining the origins of this podcast Like years before it happened Right and I wanted to fucking do that equation on Tim Burton Because Tim Burton
[01:46:03] And you're saying you haven't quite really gotten there He's kind of the ex I'll never get over Every single time a new trailer comes out No matter how many times I've been burned I'd be like what if it's like What if it's like the old times again
[01:46:14] Whereas I was fully over Tim Burton And when Dumbo came out and I saw it And I liked it I was like is it just because I've been Steeped in Burton for five months Is that part of it? I don't know
[01:46:27] Is it because you put my boyfriend in the movie? I don't know But anytime I would ask these bigger questions And my dad would be like you're overthinking it Sure I'd be like cool I need to find friends like David Sims Overthinking it you say
[01:46:38] Could we like monetize that? Right then make a podcast about it And I did like my foolish hope was that I'd come to something here Whether it was like I'm totally out on this guy Or I totally have saved him
[01:46:50] That I would have some sort of sense of peace And the answer is Sometimes people kind of lose the plot Sometimes they can get it back Sometimes it's inexplicable how it happens Or why it happens Well and I think just the culture changed
[01:47:02] And he didn't change with it Just how stuff happens Right And that's kind of the beauty of the thing Is it's like it doesn't make sense That he hit as hard as he did Sure And just as inexplicably he came out of sync You know
[01:47:17] He had a pocket where for ten years It was just like he was in there And everyone got it and he was totally unique And the fact that he was doing all that At such a high budget level With such like sort of mainstream films Was nuts
[01:47:31] Do you have your list? I can do it very quickly Okay Because I've got mine We gotta do them They rank Yeah It's time to rank Sometimes we protect But sometimes we rank Karen's laughing She shouldn't be Wasn't funny Wasn't funny My standards are low It's okay
[01:47:51] Okay I'm doing it now And hopefully I'm not forgetting any Do yours with some drama My filler Dumbo note Is that The Arcade Fire song is good I couldn't even get through the sentence I can't believe it It's good It is good I agree I like that
[01:48:06] I'll be right back Goodbye Wow Ryan Johnson said that nice thing about us once A force for good in the universe He probably regrets saying that Too late we're keeping it Film spotting wherever you get your podcasts Have a good show Griffin and David
[01:48:44] Are you ready for my top 19 Tim Burton movie It's 19 in total Correct Wow what a run it's been What a run it has been So glad to be here with you At the end of this marathon I'm gonna go 1 to 19 Okay One Ed Wood Ed Wood One
[01:49:01] Ed Wood Two Beetlejuice Yeah Three Batman Return Four Edward Scissorhand Five Pee Wee Okay so that's five Okay Six Batman Seven Sleepy Hollow Eight Mars Attack Nine Big Fish Ten Dumbo Nice Keep going Eleven Sweeney Sweeney Twelve Thirteen Charlie Fourteen Frank and Weenie Fifteen Miss Peregrini Sixteen
[01:49:38] Corpse Bride Seventeen Dark Shadows Eighteen Plan of the Apes Nineteen Blank Twenty blank Keep going keep going keep going One million Alison Wonderland That thing is the worst thing It's not good What's your favorite Burton Karen I just named them all I know they pass through my mind
[01:50:03] like water through a sieve Wow What was your number? Your number was Edward I really like Big Fish Big Fish The fish are big But also I might have to I mean I feel like it's the easy answer but like Batman Returns fucking rules
[01:50:17] Batman Returns is a good choice I genuinely don't know I think that Griffin's favorite is Edward But after that I'm not sure Are you struggling? Well give me a second I'll do mine Beetlejuice Oh shit Beetlejuice
[01:50:31] No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Oh my god Oh sorry that was close Phew Okay but yeah That's the only movie that Are you guys going to see the musical? Moving forward Yeah I've heard it
[01:50:42] No thank you I've heard it's no thank you Yes No thank you We were thinking about doing it for the podcast and then we realized like most people won't be able to see it anyway and who fucking cares and it's already supposed to be that way
[01:50:52] So we didn't do that Instead we went to an ad-skate Yeah I mean that seems like a pretty good trade off Yeah 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 I'm forgetting one Hold on Beetlejuice is so fucking good though Oh no okay it's one I like Michael Keaton truly in command of all his power
[01:51:10] You're absolutely the That's right Yeah Alcaldwin hottest Yeah Hottest bitch in the game Okay ready for my ranking? Let's do it I think this is correct I think you're going to be surprised with A couple plays much Sure Number one Edward Yeah One of my top five
[01:51:30] I mean it was locked Number two Batman Returns Sure That was a close Number two Yeah It was three for me but could have been two Number three Beetlejuice Yeah This is one of those things where it's just like Those three films Right
[01:51:46] Those are my top three too Yeah That's a perfect statement Yeah You know what I'm saying I do Keep going though Okay You got 16 more movies Number four A Mars attacks Four My friend Alright I mean that's fine Whatever I love that movie as you know
[01:52:04] I love it too Number five Edward's Skizzerhams Sure Number six Peewee's Big Adventure Okay Those two are close for me Me too I could kind of flood them Number seven A big fish Sure You like it a little more than me Pays out like a slot machine
[01:52:22] This list is paying out like a slot machine Number eight Bartman Sure Yeah Before he returned Number nine Making it into that ten I know what this is Big eyes Yeah A good movie That I wish our That's for this one Original guest hadn't failed out of
[01:52:40] Because they were going to Take my side Whatever man And instead the episode of that being a Classic example of cyberbullying What is this? I feel like it was just you talking about Good big eyes was and then me and the guest being Like I guess so
[01:52:54] We don't really like it I think we were like Griffin you're crazy I watched it with my girlfriend She had not seen it before TC14 She was like this is a masterpiece I was like yes Thank you Can't wait to go into the studio And have Ben
[01:53:06] She said it was And David and Rylos Eat some fucking crow And I got in here And you cyberbullied me I think we just Didn't agree with you Cyberbullied me Are you gamergating right now? Gamers rise up Griffin rise up for big eyes Alright number ten Swayny Swayny
[01:53:25] Number I still can't believe you guys got Michael Servers that's the most amazing Get I've heard in my entire fucking life Good guest He is a good Good man Good actor Good man What if we have him do the A Man on the Wasp commentary
[01:53:38] I mean I'll ask him I will say Much like Edward Scissorhands An uncommonly gentle man He's a very relaxing man His temperament is incredible Totally agree So of course a number eleven on my list Is the existence of Michael Servers as a person Swayny was my ten
[01:53:57] I'm gonna say that Sleepy Hollow is my eleven Sure I'm going to say that Charlie and the chocolate factory is my twelve I love Charlie and chocolate Dumbo is my thirteen Sure Okay so now we're getting to the territory Where it's like This is like These are getting
[01:54:14] These are getting dodgier The next three I'm like Dark shadows Is like kind of like a bridge to like There's a mess There's stuff I like in it a lot Then we go to like Corpse Bride and Frank and Weenie And I'm like Little, little lifeless
[01:54:30] Should I just never revisit Corpse Bride Because I really liked it when I first saw it I think it's fine I think it's cute It's so slight Yeah It's very, very slight It's a little Metatarsal Of a movie Yes She's correct Karen extended her fingers Her fingies Right
[01:54:48] And now we get to the only three that like Drive me crazy Uh huh And they are a peregrine Sure Which I still contend would be Sort of in Dark Shadows territory If it had a performer who was awake In the legal I put that above Dark Shadows
[01:55:03] But sure, go on I just like I think Dark Shadows has some Communic Energy too And some good performances Good Jackie Orale I was going to say Planet of the apes Which I mean this was a real Race to the bottom I'm giving Planet of the apes
[01:55:18] The slight edge over Alice in Wonderland Because the makeup is so good Yeah, right You got to give it the edge just for Old practical movie magic On that front Right And Gia, Madi selling Aspirin Gia, Madi Sure I'm the Rhino We're fairly similar Other than me putting
[01:55:38] A couple of the later ones A little higher You had Marshal a little higher You know I had Dumbo a little higher I have sleepy haul a lot higher than you Yeah Which I like sleeping a lot I just wanted to show some respect for Those eyes
[01:55:53] I'm so glad that you found Your person I think it's great Yeah Because I've watched that with T.C.13 Or whoever it is I'm supposed to be dating And she was like This is boring This reference system Oh boy Should we get into this?
[01:56:08] I don't think explaining this Can do us any good Okay, sure Yeah It's a character from Phantom Menace Oh, the lady droid Yeah, because I always say he wants the Come on, please This is 2019 Times have changed, sweetie Times have changed Oh no Oh boy
[01:56:34] I went to WonderCon recently You did? They were there promoting the tech In California They did for under $5 each Find a classic T.C.14 action figure Oh, the ship Still in the package With the Comtec chip And I found a really nice smith Yeah
[01:56:52] Now there were two smiths I saw the back of your phone case One That's good One cost $20 Sure Because he came with little Leia in a bundle Aww Oh my god And the other one was only five Sure But he's got a big cloth cape
[01:57:07] Oh, I love a cloth And because he's little Like two bit, like it's like swallowing What do you do? Do you take him out Or do you keep him in their box? I usually take them out But I've been kind of thinking about
[01:57:20] There's a little Imperial guard right here Ben's Red Boy Yeah, it's my Red Boy I'm a taker outer Yeah I will say with these We're talking in the tub You gotta put them in the tub You gotta put them in the tub My tub barely room for water
[01:57:36] Too many figures What an image I'm back You've been considering stand up material That's a great open Do you take a lot of sponge baths? Like I sponge myself down with Orco Oh, yeah, yeah I lather with sneak eyes Wow Vlad Burton's over
[01:58:01] So long and farewell my friend What I was gonna say is I've sort of been forming a collection That I've been keeping in package Of specifically our like Star Wars friends Like the characters that were The characters that really became big for us Through doing those episodes
[01:58:16] Because I like having a little It doesn't feel like part of my collection It feels like a little history of blank check Shrine With our old revenge on the podcast poster And it's like I want to grog around that I have my bigger TC14
[01:58:30] I want a wato and it's like that's sort of my group Yeah You know Yeah It reminds me of what, how far we've come We've come so far And Gragra has been with us the whole time I had a dream last night about finding a Gragra
[01:58:42] Does such a thing exist Apart from as part of that like Jar Jar thing No it does And I had a like for some reason The three of us were in a Walmart And you were like Griffin we gotta go and I was like
[01:58:53] I think I found a Gragra Oh my god I've never been to a Walmart Ever? No cause they're not in the city Are you serious? Yeah Well in your city boys live in the city your entire life Right and they don't They're not in the one Britain
[01:59:06] Well that's irrelevant though We were saying just as a place that you would vacation Yeah I also live there Scoozie? What? Scoozie No sorry hold on I was distracted What are we talking about I'm from London mate What? Sweetie There's no place like it
[01:59:25] Wait a second Ben check your chair Is there a weird lever Or a series of gears I had a shave I want you to bleed us It's the demon podcaster of Midtown Oh boy I was in that in college Who do you play? Who do you play? Joanna
[01:59:45] Fucking Baker lady You forgot her name for a second here At your Lansbury No I did vocal director And whatever random shit they need You did ensemble swing Sort of ensemble business I taught everyone their music Because nobody could read music You're big into music
[02:00:03] Did you perform a lot in the musicals Or did you more often do that You did acapella right You were an acapella Why would you do dox me like this I'm sorry I'm not doxing you I just No it's true I did
[02:00:13] Not doxing like the name of your group or anything I just remember that you did that It's not hard Yeah I did acapella in college I did musical theater in college Yeah yeah yeah That's the name from my What are you looking at What are you looking at
[02:00:23] Where did you sit Where do you uh alto Tenor Where does your fall I can't do whatever I mean like I didn't do it seriously enough That I ever had to think about it that hard Okay I liked doing it but that was it
[02:00:34] I trained in classical piano That was my background One of my favorite bits you do Is when you go look at how hard this song slaps And then you post a screen shot of sheet music What was the Sinatra song Oh yeah Karen tell me
[02:00:50] You're like look at this fucking thing No this is like a thing that Karen Like woke me up with one more day It was in the group chat I don't remember what song it was It was literally like New York New York Like it was certainly
[02:01:03] No you're right I think it was a very famous song It wasn't like a deep cut No no it wasn't And she said do you want to say it or should I I'll say it I said no you say it
[02:01:13] Well I believe you posted a link to the song Yeah And you were like I'm listening to this You just don't get horns like that anymore Something like that And everybody got very mad We were just like New York New York You mean like start spreading the new
[02:01:30] Like that song It just don't get horns like that anymore It's good sure Like I mean it's sort of like The Star Spangled Banner Someone was like what a great song And I'm like I guess so I certainly heard it a lot
[02:01:43] Okay no but I maintain that I am right Brass is not a huge component Of most modern music This is true you're right Band sort of eschewed the brass But we should go back You don't get brass like that anymore But we should it's great when you do
[02:01:58] That's why also like when the orchestral Scores they go back to being like 60 whatever piece orchestra It's the best Of course sure Yeah You don't get brass like that anymore Don't that's why my point is Mikey G Jack and I He knows what's up Right
[02:02:14] Oh let's just briefly mention Daniel Finn's score does not register No not really All his other regulars are doing great work Yeah Colleen's doing amazing work 900 X Yeah But yeah I don't know Listen to it on the way I can't remember a note I don't either
[02:02:31] Aaron Krueger the writer of A Transformers sequel For this movie I think three Transformers sequels Yeah One of the good ones though I think and then two of the bad ones Yeah Good one We'll get to that Dark in the Moon Do you want to say winky-winky?
[02:02:49] No because we're not actually We're not really on the agenda This year You heard it here first You should though say what is happening next week No no we say that next week Oh oh oh right Oh What specific thing we're doing next week
[02:03:04] Next week we will talk about The future of the podcast The next couple mini series we're doing We're gonna announce two at the end of that episode That's that Govreminsky twice Double kill Backwards and forwards Todd Atlas style The cure for wellness episodes
[02:03:19] We're gonna go butt each other Yes No that's not what we're doing Night time has come Your time was now I feel really bad My true day in the sun For kind of killing Gore this year You felt such guilt because you had that one tweet
[02:03:36] And the change was really dramatic And then you tweeted like eight more times We were like look I mean Gore's got a lot of good stuff going on You know like you felt really But it was a He never recovered from that
[02:03:46] Demi was the one who swang Demi Demi swang Demi did you see that? Yes You know when he like retweeted the whole Like yeah I'll come on the pod Yeah That was Which he will do Yeah of course he's in the spreadsheet
[02:03:58] You should see some of the people in the spreadsheet Oh my god Oh my god We got some good ones line I know we always say that But it gets exciting the more we go on Well especially since we've done so much Burton
[02:04:09] It's like oh yeah right new shit A bunch of Demi Blu-rays arrived at my house today Nice A lot of people were like I'm gonna do a Burton get back to me in five months You know we had certain people who have been like
[02:04:20] Hovering on the guest list for Yeah For a year Oh no Uh yeah We got some big ones though But before that we got two others In the series then before that We have a Ben's Choice Benjamin J. Hossley Oh yay
[02:04:34] Yeah I don't know if your middle name is J It's McCormick Benjamin M. Hossley We hadn't done a proper Ben's Choice in a while It's been a long time And I've always been promising King Ralph Now we'll eventually get to King Ralph A Ben porch classic
[02:04:47] Part of the Ben porch classic Curation is like weird movies I just had on VHS and just watched Religiously But I decided to switch things up Because I stan And I stan What do you stan Ben How are you gonna say this Let him get it out
[02:05:06] I stan the stealing boys And girls The stealing boys Wait hold on What Assassin's Creed I thought they were robbers too In my mind I mean they gotta get that apple They rob people of their lives That is true The greatest robber Shut up Exactly
[02:05:27] We'll come back to like when I took a long pause Grand Theft Mortality Go ahead you stan for what Assassin's Creed Cool And then keep in all the earlier stuff Justin Kersel's Assassin's Creed I love that movie Karen It's good I love it He's seen it 20 times
[02:05:46] Yeah I watch it all the time He watches it when he can't fall asleep Karen has a look of genuine surprise on her face Yeah Karen has a silly style I've never played the video game But those sequences are great No affinity for the game
[02:05:59] I don't know anything about it I've played Assassin's Creed Odyssey No I'm saying Ben has no There's no element of like It's just a movie So excited to see this realized on the big screen I barely remember how that episode went But I think it's weird
[02:06:10] It's super weird It's super weird Weird movie I own it in 4K Oh my god It's good I like it Next week Assassin's Creed At the end of that episode we're announcing the next Chew mini series That's right mates Why are you doing that for us? Timesize change
[02:06:29] Sing it I'm singing it Did you ever do musical theater? No I can't sing I'm not a good singer I did play theater Couple your most recent senses Would beg to disagree Times is hard And do your beast impression again? On the beast It's terrible Nobody likes me
[02:06:51] Do you remember how at the end of that movie Stanley Tucci who was playing a piano Attacks all the robbers by spitting out his keys And then the very last shot of the movie Is a zero in on him
[02:07:02] And he smiles and you see all his fake teeth And that's the last shot of the movie Probably the best shot of the movie too It ended on a high And then they play it in Memoriam Reel For everyone who is in it
[02:07:15] Is there not a bit in that movie When all the household items start coming to life That the toilet talks and tells someone not to piss in it Am I imagining that? You might be but I also wouldn't be surprised Or like a bedpan or something
[02:07:28] A chamber pot I feel like there's some Human waste receptacle gag Where it says don't you dare Oh boy You know an Eileen Atkins plays the fucking This is how it ties into the fucking toy story For it's like what should be granted life Yep
[02:07:46] And here's my question My final question I want to ask you Karen For the episode Now that we've come full circle Is Lumiere the ultimate KB Because he is the man who literally is a Malthan Camel Yeah Lumiere is kind of got This is played by Orbach though
[02:08:06] Oh yes Not McGregor That's some real KB energy Yeah he's up there KB We're done Before we keep going we're done We've done two hours fifteen minutes This has been a great episode But I think we're done Yeah Karen people can read yourself from Polygon
[02:08:22] Polygon.com and I'm on Twitter at Karen Waihan Strongest brand on the internet Hell yeah And tune in next week For the Cree Join the Cree One of the top creeds One of the top creeds Probably my third favorite creed movie They gotta protect the seeds Yeah
[02:08:40] They do have to protect the seeds That is true Yeah What if Tim Burton had made Assassin's Creed Oh god So many seeds Thank you all for listening Please remember to rate or review, subscribe Go see Dumbo Thanks for going over to our social media Go see Dumbo
[02:08:53] Yeah see Dumbo Yeah come on I mean this movie Bombing is only gonna make These live action Disney movies less interesting Yeah Right We didn't do the box office game Whatever It came out a week ago It bombed What did 55 45
[02:09:08] Do you know what the biggest bomb of last year was? Really? Shazam did 55 Biggest bomb of last year was Mortal Engines Yeah it was My sweet baby The Engines Strike, we stain a legend Strike is so fucking good Strike is so good When he's scream When he's scream
[02:09:20] What's her name again? Hestia Sturin What if Tim Burton had done Mortal Engies What a rule Morty Engies Morty Engies Also kind of couldn't be better Mortal Engies is good Easily be better If I would Tim Burton I would announce I was making Shrike the movie
[02:09:38] Oh my god How do I pitch this to a major studio? Shrikes big vacation Shrikes big day out Shrikes big top Shrike Big top Shrike That's the pitch Shrike by Artman Yes Here's the thing Mortal Engies is good Every time I recommend to someone
[02:09:54] I keep walking it back I keep being like it's great No it's alright No it's fine But here I'm gonna take it back on the record Mortal Engies is top to bottom T to be good She's throttling up again I'm revving up It's a T to BGM
[02:10:07] T to BG Thanks Tange for a good offer of soulful media Yes, I agree Thank you to Lea Montgomery for our theme song Okay Shobbo and Pat Reynolds for our artwork Go to Blanky Satrith I come for some real nerdy shit
[02:10:21] Go to T Public for some real nerdy shirts You can subscribe for Blank Check Bonus Features on Patreon Talking about those Marvel movies And basketball episode We'll be dropping May 11th Hell yeah If Ben remembers Hell yeah So feel free to sign up in time for that
[02:10:39] He claims the audio is salvageable It's more than salvageable It's good Ben did it He fucking did it He had the feather He didn't even need it Ben had the feather in them all along That's the power of fashion Ben
[02:10:56] I had the holes in me the whole time You had the holes in you I had the dirt The jeans They're all there The hole in mine And as always Dumb-o-Fox No he's a child They don't No Yes No I mean Yeah, I guess that's it