Lady in the Water with Richard Lawson

[00:00:01] Blank Check with Griffin and David, say no to X-Bat

[00:00:13] All you need to know is that the name of the show is Blank Check

[00:00:20] There's a podcast in the water

[00:00:23] Good. Strong, simple

[00:00:25] So I've been having a panic attack for the last 48 hours

[00:00:27] And I just didn't even, I have a lot to say about this episode but I didn't want to put time into planning out

[00:00:31] The opening I just thought let's go

[00:00:33] Welcome, Razor, let's go straight the fuck into it

[00:00:35] My name is Griffin Neumann

[00:00:36] David Sims

[00:00:37] This is

[00:00:38] A Pod Night Shyamacast, Blank Check

[00:00:40] Blank Check with Griffin and David

[00:00:41] This is a podcast where we discuss filmographies and one-offs of people

[00:00:47] Waco Directors

[00:00:48] Waco Directors

[00:00:49] Boom, let's keep going

[00:00:50] I like this idea that we're just gonna go fast

[00:00:52] Yeah, this guy's name is M Night Shyamalan

[00:00:55] This is his seventh movie

[00:00:57] It is

[00:00:58] Lucky number seven for M Night

[00:01:01] Lady in the Water

[00:01:03] He would have done a better job with Lucky number seven than whoever directed it

[00:01:06] Yeah, Paul McGuigan

[00:01:08] Yeah

[00:01:09] Lucky number seven, not terrible

[00:01:11] Not great

[00:01:12] You know who's good in it?

[00:01:13] Lucy Liu

[00:01:15] Yeah, when's she bad?

[00:01:17] Exactly

[00:01:18] When's she bad?

[00:01:19] She's never bad

[00:01:20] And that ladies and gentlemen weighing in with the voice of reason on Lucy Liu never being bad is of course our good friends

[00:01:27] He, you might know his work from Vanity Fair

[00:01:32] Vanity Fair?

[00:01:33] He's Vanity Fair's film critic

[00:01:34] What?

[00:01:35] Chief head?

[00:01:36] That's right

[00:01:37] What's the term?

[00:01:38] Vanity Fair's head

[00:01:40] I'm Graydon Carter's wig

[00:01:42] Ladies and gentlemen, Richard Lawson

[00:01:44] Hey guys

[00:01:45] Hey Richard

[00:01:46] Thanks for having me

[00:01:47] Long time first time?

[00:01:48] Oh yeah

[00:01:49] I was telling Ben before we started that when I listened to your first episode ever about Phantom Menace

[00:01:54] I was like this is a mess and what are they doing?

[00:01:56] But then I would like 30 minutes and I was like oh I'm in love with this

[00:02:00] The first 30 minutes of the first episode of this podcast are they're not great

[00:02:05] They're Phantom Menace?

[00:02:07] Yeah, yeah they are

[00:02:08] Yeah

[00:02:09] They are slow out of the gate I would say

[00:02:12] But then we pulled a reverse George

[00:02:14] We pulled a reverse Lucas

[00:02:16] Yeah

[00:02:17] We just got better as we went along

[00:02:19] Yeah, that's right

[00:02:21] Let's talk about George Lucas

[00:02:23] Let's talk about our night shine one

[00:02:25] You know who would have done a better job with Lady in the Water? George Lucas

[00:02:27] Yeah

[00:02:28] You know who would have done a better job with the Star Wars pre-equals?

[00:02:31] Yeah

[00:02:33] Maybe

[00:02:34] Perchance

[00:02:35] He can't direct action

[00:02:36] Okay so let's talk about someone who can direct action

[00:02:39] He's the fourth man in the studio today

[00:02:41] And he's directing us all

[00:02:43] Into the booth, directing our levels to the right balance

[00:02:47] He's here in the room with us again

[00:02:49] This is the plot thread everyone hangs

[00:02:51] Every week

[00:02:52] Where's Ben?

[00:02:53] This is a new feature every week

[00:02:54] But here's the twist

[00:02:55] There's also a walkie-talkie in the room

[00:02:57] Oh yes

[00:02:58] And he said that perhaps he might have to leave at some point during the recording

[00:03:02] This is great top of podcast stuff

[00:03:04] I love it

[00:03:05] Keeping them interested and engaged

[00:03:07] Wait who's this guy we're talking about?

[00:03:09] Well it goes by a few names

[00:03:11] Producer Ben

[00:03:13] Produceur Ben

[00:03:14] The Ben Deucer

[00:03:16] The Haas

[00:03:17] The Poet Laureate

[00:03:18] Yeah

[00:03:19] The Tiebreaker

[00:03:20] That's true

[00:03:21] Birthday Benny

[00:03:22] Mr. Positive

[00:03:23] Oh Mr. Positive

[00:03:24] He's doing it off the top of his head

[00:03:25] Yep

[00:03:26] Sometimes they call him the Peeper

[00:03:28] Oh yeah

[00:03:29] That's one

[00:03:30] The Peeper is good

[00:03:31] Ladies and gentlemen

[00:03:32] Where to God

[00:03:33] You call him Professor Crispy

[00:03:34] You will have something to reckon for

[00:03:37] That is true

[00:03:38] Not a nickname

[00:03:39] He's got his fans though

[00:03:40] Professor Crispy

[00:03:41] Oh yeah the Haas Hogs

[00:03:42] They tweeted us

[00:03:43] The Haas Hogs you're talking about

[00:03:45] Do you have a new name for him now?

[00:03:46] People call him

[00:03:47] Haas Hogs

[00:03:48] Producer Ben Kenobi

[00:03:49] They call him

[00:03:50] Kylo Ben

[00:03:51] I think we hit all the big ones right?

[00:03:53] Yeah probably

[00:03:54] There's probably other Hello Fennel

[00:03:55] We got that one

[00:03:56] No

[00:03:57] Hello Fennel

[00:03:58] Can't forget that one

[00:03:59] Well I always try to end with that one

[00:04:00] I say

[00:04:01] Oh sure

[00:04:02] And let's grant a hardy Hello Fennel

[00:04:03] You've literally never done that

[00:04:04] I've done it once

[00:04:05] I think once before

[00:04:06] I always try to do it

[00:04:07] Alright

[00:04:08] His name is Ben Hosley

[00:04:09] And I love him

[00:04:10] Yep

[00:04:11] Ben's here

[00:04:12] It's nice to have you Ben

[00:04:13] It's much better than last time

[00:04:14] When we did the village

[00:04:15] And you were silent

[00:04:16] Until like 90 minutes in

[00:04:17] When you just screamed

[00:04:18] End this

[00:04:19] And that's what

[00:04:20] David Erlick was sort of alarmed

[00:04:21] He was quite alarmed

[00:04:22] Yeah that was good

[00:04:23] Understandably

[00:04:24] Um David

[00:04:25] You have your laptop open

[00:04:27] It was like 9pm too you know

[00:04:28] It was our first ever late night recording

[00:04:30] Uh huh

[00:04:31] Blank check nights we call it

[00:04:32] It's our new saucier spin-off

[00:04:34] Chelsea nights

[00:04:35] We're in Chelsea

[00:04:36] Chelsea nights

[00:04:37] Yeah

[00:04:38] My laptop is open

[00:04:39] What do you want?

[00:04:40] Will you go to iTunes reviews

[00:04:41] Cause there are a couple recent ones

[00:04:42] I want to read

[00:04:43] I trust your judgment to pick out

[00:04:44] Which ones they are

[00:04:45] But there are a couple short ones

[00:04:46] That I think are of import

[00:04:47] I'm opening iTunes

[00:04:48] So within an hour

[00:04:49] I'm just ready for you

[00:04:50] So I'm gonna vamp with some other housekeeping

[00:04:51] As you do that

[00:04:52] Of course we are part of the

[00:04:53] UCB Comedy Network

[00:04:54] Which has recently gotten a big push on iTunes

[00:04:56] Yeah

[00:04:57] Guess what

[00:04:58] You know what

[00:04:59] Help the family help us

[00:05:00] Please

[00:05:01] Subscribe to some of our other shows

[00:05:03] We were on the front page of iTunes

[00:05:05] We were on the front page of iTunes

[00:05:07] I think we still are

[00:05:08] Hey what

[00:05:09] Hey what

[00:05:10] UCB Comedy is also

[00:05:11] Gonna be a feature provider

[00:05:13] I believe when this episode comes out

[00:05:15] Oh my lord

[00:05:16] So

[00:05:17] Fun stuff happening

[00:05:18] Well yeah

[00:05:19] Check out all our shows

[00:05:20] You don't need to listen to them

[00:05:21] Just subscribe and then rate and review

[00:05:22] Just perfect

[00:05:23] Update

[00:05:24] My iTunes has freaked out

[00:05:25] That I unsubscribe from Apple Music

[00:05:26] And is currently crashing

[00:05:27] So just keep giving me an update

[00:05:29] On how iTunes is working

[00:05:30] Okay great

[00:05:31] Love iTunes

[00:05:32] Great

[00:05:33] You know what

[00:05:34] We'll get to the reviews later

[00:05:35] Yeah we'll get to that

[00:05:36] I'm trying to think if there are

[00:05:37] Any other pieces of housekeeping

[00:05:38] Not for now

[00:05:39] I might remember something later

[00:05:40] I feel like there were one or two

[00:05:41] Things relevant to the franchise at large

[00:05:43] Maybe

[00:05:44] I'll get to them later

[00:05:45] Alright

[00:05:46] Okay so today we're here to talk

[00:05:47] About a new film called

[00:05:49] The Lady in the Water

[00:05:50] Oh there's no the

[00:05:51] There's no the

[00:05:52] I'm sorry I fucked up

[00:05:53] And I stopped myself

[00:05:54] Because I remembered what

[00:05:55] The housekeeping business was

[00:05:56] There's a new segment

[00:05:57] There are two new segments

[00:05:58] I want to introduce on this episode

[00:05:59] One of them I think is long overdue

[00:06:01] And one of them is

[00:06:03] We're forced to add this segment

[00:06:05] Because of two big occurrences

[00:06:06] In the last week David

[00:06:08] That happened to two of us

[00:06:09] Hashtag the two friends

[00:06:11] The two friends hashtag

[00:06:12] We are the two friends

[00:06:13] We need to mention that

[00:06:14] This is a new segment called

[00:06:15] The burger report

[00:06:19] Oh oh

[00:06:21] This is the one that's inspired by me

[00:06:24] Also inspired by me

[00:06:25] Oh I'm also inspired by you

[00:06:26] Right I saw your tweet

[00:06:27] Two things happen in one week

[00:06:28] I gotta start a segment

[00:06:29] This segment's gonna open up

[00:06:30] Every week we'll check in

[00:06:32] At the burger report

[00:06:33] There might be no news

[00:06:34] Yeah probably

[00:06:35] But if either of us

[00:06:36] Our guest or producer Ben

[00:06:37] AKA producer Ben

[00:06:39] AKA the vendor

[00:06:40] Don't do that

[00:06:41] Go on

[00:06:42] Any updates about people

[00:06:43] Cool people they've gotten

[00:06:44] See, eat a burger

[00:06:46] This is the segment where

[00:06:47] That update will go

[00:06:48] So David would you like to

[00:06:49] Lead with the first

[00:06:50] Do do do do do do do do do do do

[00:06:52] Do do do do do do

[00:06:53] Burger report

[00:06:54] Sure I'm gonna request that

[00:06:55] You cancel the theme music

[00:06:57] Maybe we get new theme music

[00:06:58] I'll ask Lane Montgomery

[00:07:00] Of course give us a burger

[00:07:01] Our theme song

[00:07:02] Yeah last night I was at

[00:07:04] Moo Burger on

[00:07:05] Court Street in Carol Gardens

[00:07:07] Humblebred

[00:07:08] Yeah cool

[00:07:10] Court Street

[00:07:11] I was eating a

[00:07:13] 6pm dinner

[00:07:14] Bob DeValler

[00:07:15] I was in my robes

[00:07:17] Yeah I was at

[00:07:19] Moo Burger by the way

[00:07:20] Located within the Princeton club

[00:07:21] I don't know if you know

[00:07:22] Yeah I was eating a

[00:07:24] 6pm dinner so it was

[00:07:25] Clogged with infants

[00:07:27] This Moo Burger

[00:07:29] And next to me

[00:07:31] Was Michael Shannon

[00:07:32] Oscar nominee Michael Shannon

[00:07:34] Eating with a bunch of kids

[00:07:36] And a couple of adults

[00:07:38] Eating his own burger

[00:07:39] Does he look really serious

[00:07:40] When he's eating a hamburger

[00:07:41] He looked serious all the time

[00:07:43] Very handsome in my opinion

[00:07:45] Very tall

[00:07:46] Just

[00:07:47] Yeah a little craggy

[00:07:48] He had some facial hair

[00:07:49] Looked great

[00:07:50] And obviously my girlfriend

[00:07:52] Was with me and I was like

[00:07:53] Michael Shannon

[00:07:54] And she's just like

[00:07:56] Nope

[00:07:57] And then she's like

[00:07:59] Sorority?

[00:08:00] The sorority letter

[00:08:01] And I'm like

[00:08:02] What are you talking about

[00:08:03] I don't know what she's

[00:08:04] I'm like that's not a movie

[00:08:05] I don't know

[00:08:06] And of course I remember

[00:08:07] He did that funny or die

[00:08:08] Video where he reads that

[00:08:09] Angry sorority letter

[00:08:10] That went around the internet last year

[00:08:12] I don't usually like those

[00:08:13] People reading things

[00:08:14] No I rewatched it

[00:08:15] And I was like this is fantastic

[00:08:16] It's a very well acted piece

[00:08:18] Yeah that's why because he's a great actor

[00:08:19] You should have just told your girlfriend

[00:08:21] That he was the recipient of this year's

[00:08:23] Griffin Blank Check Award

[00:08:24] I did mention his performance

[00:08:26] And your love for it in the night before to her

[00:08:28] And she has seen Man of Steel

[00:08:30] So I mean

[00:08:31] Has Joanna ever listened to the podcast

[00:08:33] I shouldn't name her

[00:08:34] Yeah yeah she usually listens to it

[00:08:35] Okay she does

[00:08:36] I wasn't leading anything with that

[00:08:37] I'm just always curious

[00:08:38] She doesn't listen every episode

[00:08:39] But if she's seen the movie she listens to

[00:08:41] Okay

[00:08:42] Okay so now time for the next

[00:08:44] installment of the Burger Report

[00:08:46] Uh huh

[00:08:50] I was in

[00:08:52] Humbl-Brag Hollywood, California

[00:08:54] Hollywood

[00:08:55] I went to a place called

[00:08:56] Apple Pan in Los Angeles

[00:08:57] That's my favorite place

[00:08:58] It's all the way

[00:08:59] It's a little overwhelming I find

[00:09:00] But like the whole process

[00:09:01] Of like getting a seat and stuff

[00:09:03] But I do like it

[00:09:04] I went there and it was

[00:09:05] Pretty empty which was really nice

[00:09:07] It was a weekday probably

[00:09:08] I went on like a Saturday afternoon

[00:09:09] Yeah uh very quiet

[00:09:11] It really feels like a time machine

[00:09:12] Walking into that place

[00:09:13] It doesn't feel retro kitschy

[00:09:14] It's in a weird part of town

[00:09:15] That's kind of fun

[00:09:16] Very weird part of town

[00:09:17] That was within walking distance

[00:09:18] My hotel which is

[00:09:19] All I look for

[00:09:20] As someone who doesn't know

[00:09:21] How to drive a car

[00:09:22] Where is it in

[00:09:23] Oh I have no idea

[00:09:24] It just felt weird

[00:09:25] I've definitely heard of the Apple Pan

[00:09:26] Century City

[00:09:27] I think it's

[00:09:28] But it's not like

[00:09:29] The big buildings

[00:09:30] That you think of

[00:09:31] When you think of Century City

[00:09:32] It's more just like

[00:09:33] It's just I don't know

[00:09:34] It's sort of in-between

[00:09:35] Century City and West LA

[00:09:36] And it's near a mall

[00:09:37] That's not very popular

[00:09:38] Yeah sure

[00:09:39] Okay

[00:09:40] It's a great place

[00:09:41] They serve you soda

[00:09:42] In like a paper triangle

[00:09:44] Okay

[00:09:45] But what happened

[00:09:46] What happened at the Apple Pan

[00:09:48] Well here I am

[00:09:49] Just eating my steak burger

[00:09:50] Sounds good

[00:09:51] Medium rare

[00:09:52] Cheese

[00:09:53] I also got my burger

[00:09:54] Medium rare with cheese

[00:09:55] This is why the burger reports

[00:09:57] Important

[00:09:58] Because you gotta find these things out

[00:09:59] We don't know how Michael Shannon

[00:10:00] Got his

[00:10:01] Well I looked him up

[00:10:02] In these vegetarian

[00:10:03] So he think he was eating a veggie burger

[00:10:04] Oh and you don't want to eat those

[00:10:05] Rare

[00:10:06] That's good to take

[00:10:07] Cook those suckers

[00:10:08] I'm down in the spray

[00:10:10] I'm chomping at my burger

[00:10:11] Mmm

[00:10:12] I'm salting and peppering my fries

[00:10:13] Yeah

[00:10:14] I take a look over my shoulder

[00:10:15] And who is there

[00:10:17] But three time

[00:10:18] Yes

[00:10:19] Recent

[00:10:20] Three time

[00:10:21] A historic

[00:10:22] And historic

[00:10:23] Three time

[00:10:24] Academy Award winner

[00:10:25] For best cinematography

[00:10:26] Consecutive awards

[00:10:28] Mm-hmm

[00:10:29] Emanuel Lubezki

[00:10:30] Chivo himself

[00:10:31] Well see it now

[00:10:32] I didn't call him that

[00:10:33] Because I'm not his friend

[00:10:34] Okay fine

[00:10:35] And this is a pet peeve

[00:10:36] Known as Chivo

[00:10:37] We do it

[00:10:38] I do ironically

[00:10:39] Do you call him Marty

[00:10:40] I call him Marty

[00:10:41] Yes

[00:10:42] I call him Marty Lubezki

[00:10:44] He was there with his parents

[00:10:46] Okay

[00:10:47] Eating a burger

[00:10:48] Well that's nice

[00:10:49] It was really nice

[00:10:50] With his parents

[00:10:51] Yeah his parents

[00:10:52] Okay

[00:10:53] I mean they might have just been two old people

[00:10:54] They were speaking Spanish

[00:10:55] I might be racist

[00:10:56] Racist against Spaniards

[00:10:58] But he was hanging out with two old Spaniards

[00:11:00] Or is he Mexican actually

[00:11:01] He's Mexican

[00:11:02] He's Mexican

[00:11:03] He was speaking with two old Mexicans

[00:11:05] And they looked very proud

[00:11:06] Sure

[00:11:07] Did he have his Oscars out?

[00:11:09] No you texted me and asked me that

[00:11:10] My joke I made was that he was using all three

[00:11:12] At once to apply condiments to his burger

[00:11:14] Sure yeah

[00:11:15] Ketchup, mustard and mayo

[00:11:16] Funny off the cuff text

[00:11:17] I thought pretty good within the circumstances

[00:11:19] What

[00:11:20] Any further questions Ben or Richard about

[00:11:22] Either of these burgers that we win

[00:11:23] No I just feel sad that I didn't

[00:11:25] I don't have one

[00:11:26] You have no burgers for us

[00:11:27] I mean I've seen famous people eat hamburgers

[00:11:28] Just not this week

[00:11:29] Well if you want to toss out

[00:11:30] A famous person eating a hamburger

[00:11:31] Like from your past

[00:11:33] That's okay

[00:11:34] I saw

[00:11:38] Toronto Film Festival

[00:11:39] I saw a lot of celebrities eating

[00:11:40] Little tiny hamburgers

[00:11:41] Because they were pastor-derbs

[00:11:42] But I can't specifically remember

[00:11:44] I think Rachel McAdams

[00:11:45] A good one

[00:11:46] Good one

[00:11:47] I'll also say Richard

[00:11:48] You have an open invitation

[00:11:49] Anytime you have a burger scoop

[00:11:51] Can I send it over?

[00:11:52] Can I send it over?

[00:11:53] Yes

[00:11:54] Just Uber Uber Uber

[00:11:55] Anything you want to

[00:11:56] Oh it could be like on Radio Lab

[00:11:57] I could leave you a message

[00:11:58] And you could play

[00:11:59] We should have

[00:12:00] A 24 hour, seven days a week

[00:12:02] Phone line that people can call into

[00:12:03] And leave us messages on

[00:12:04] It's a worthy expense

[00:12:06] I think that you should look into that

[00:12:08] Ben

[00:12:09] Just setting that up for us

[00:12:10] And then you can say

[00:12:11] Could just call my answering service

[00:12:12] Yeah

[00:12:13] Or Ben could just be the answering service

[00:12:15] Yeah I'll just give out my personal cell phone

[00:12:18] Hello Fennel

[00:12:20] I do have a couple reviews

[00:12:21] Or should we just get into Lady in the Water

[00:12:23] These reviews are very short

[00:12:24] I got a burger

[00:12:25] I got burger stories every day

[00:12:26] Sorry Ben

[00:12:28] Now here's the thing

[00:12:29] But you have to pick one

[00:12:30] That's the point

[00:12:31] I want to say I used to work at the spot at PIC

[00:12:33] Oh my God

[00:12:34] Very fancy

[00:12:35] A lot of burger stories

[00:12:36] What a good segment

[00:12:37] We got an infinite well of burger stories

[00:12:39] I can dive in anytime

[00:12:40] But I'll say top one

[00:12:41] I had Kanye West

[00:12:43] Oh that's pretty

[00:12:44] He's pretty

[00:12:45] He's quite famous

[00:12:46] The VIP section

[00:12:47] He never looked at me once

[00:12:50] But he ordered a couple of drinks

[00:12:52] Wow

[00:12:53] And he ordered a burger

[00:12:54] He did this all without

[00:12:55] He sent the burger back

[00:12:56] He never actually looked at me once

[00:12:58] What was his problem with the burger?

[00:12:59] He said he wanted it more

[00:13:00] He was well done

[00:13:01] He wanted it more well done

[00:13:02] That's the kind of annoying weird thing

[00:13:06] But he would do

[00:13:07] And he was so upset that we only offered blue cheese

[00:13:10] As the cheese option

[00:13:11] I'm like I don't know man

[00:13:12] I'm just some dumb waiter

[00:13:14] What do you want from me?

[00:13:15] Wait you're saying that you were a dumb waiter?

[00:13:17] Like the Thomas Jefferson elevator waiter

[00:13:19] That was my job

[00:13:20] That was my job

[00:13:21] I want it more well done

[00:13:23] That was my review of life of Pablo

[00:13:26] Life is more well done please

[00:13:29] Life of Pablo

[00:13:31] I haven't slept in life

[00:13:33] That's been a running theme on the show

[00:13:35] Quick reviews and then we're going to jump straight into

[00:13:37] The water

[00:13:38] Here's one review from TC14

[00:13:40] That says that the viewers review is titled Good Show

[00:13:42] Cool

[00:13:43] Says could you use more bits?

[00:13:45] Look we hear your complaints

[00:13:47] We're giving you bits right now

[00:13:49] Jeffrey Malone

[00:13:51] Brother to Rob Malone

[00:13:52] Friend to the Shows

[00:13:53] Says gives us five stars and says

[00:13:55] I like it when Griffin gives out comedy points

[00:13:58] So Griffin keep doing that

[00:13:59] I'm going to start doing that regularly

[00:14:01] My friends and I invented that

[00:14:03] Sam Rogal, Patrick May and Alejandra Collini

[00:14:06] We created that

[00:14:07] I'll keep it going on the show

[00:14:09] Here's my favorite one

[00:14:10] This is by Bob Duvall

[00:14:12] Spelled D-U-V-A-L

[00:14:14] Fine actor

[00:14:15] Well alright

[00:14:17] The title of the review is

[00:14:18] I'm Bob Duvall

[00:14:20] And the review is

[00:14:22] And I'm the judge

[00:14:24] Good review

[00:14:27] Yeah so I think we should leave it there

[00:14:29] Because that's really good

[00:14:30] I think there was one more review

[00:14:32] I'm not going to make you search for it

[00:14:33] There's one more review where the line I remember was

[00:14:35] I don't get the TC14 thing

[00:14:37] To which I say

[00:14:39] Fuck you, drink a cup of diarrhea

[00:14:41] So now on to today's film

[00:14:43] Strong words

[00:14:44] What's not to get?

[00:14:45] What are you talking about?

[00:14:46] What's not to get?

[00:14:47] I think they just think you're a gross dude

[00:14:49] Who pervs on a robot too much

[00:14:51] Well you're allowed to say that

[00:14:53] And I will accept that

[00:14:55] And I will agree

[00:14:56] Alright

[00:14:57] But don't say you don't get TC14

[00:14:59] It's offensive to her

[00:15:00] The year is 2006

[00:15:02] Great time

[00:15:03] Big year

[00:15:04] Yeah what's going on in 2006?

[00:15:05] I moved to New York City

[00:15:06] You moved to New York City

[00:15:07] Congratulations

[00:15:08] America's really starting to feel

[00:15:10] George W. Bush's suckiness

[00:15:12] I feel like that's one at all

[00:15:13] We were headed for a very good midterm election

[00:15:14] We were headed for that very exciting yes

[00:15:16] The Democrats retook the House and the Senate

[00:15:18] I believe

[00:15:19] It's the rally

[00:15:20] What else is happening?

[00:15:22] I was still in college

[00:15:23] You were probably

[00:15:24] I was in high school

[00:15:25] In 2011 happened five years ago

[00:15:27] It's true

[00:15:28] Look

[00:15:29] I believe

[00:15:30] Yes, technically yes

[00:15:32] I believe at the time of this film's release

[00:15:35] I was in an animation program

[00:15:37] I was doing a summer animation intensive

[00:15:39] At NYU because I thought I wanted to be an animator

[00:15:41] Sure this one came out in July 2006

[00:15:43] Yes I was at NYU attempting to be an animator

[00:15:46] They still haven't found any weapons of mass destruction

[00:15:50] Sure we were like

[00:15:51] Embroiled in the Middle East

[00:15:53] Had Betrayus reared his head yet

[00:15:55] Had the surge happened yet?

[00:15:57] I don't think so

[00:15:58] I think Hurricane Katrina was the year prior

[00:16:01] I moved to New York City in July 2006

[00:16:03] So basically me and Lady in the Water

[00:16:05] Have a real strong connection

[00:16:07] Did you see it in New York City?

[00:16:08] No I had never seen it

[00:16:09] I had also never seen this film

[00:16:11] Really?

[00:16:12] Okay so I'm at this

[00:16:13] I had thought that I had seen this film

[00:16:15] But there is no way

[00:16:16] I saw the first like ten minutes

[00:16:18] And it was like absolutely not

[00:16:19] I might have caught some of it on TV

[00:16:22] I was in this animation program

[00:16:25] That was at NYU

[00:16:26] I grew up like three blocks away

[00:16:28] From where this program was happening

[00:16:30] Right?

[00:16:31] And they had like

[00:16:32] Like it was run like a prison

[00:16:34] Like we had to be escorted to the bathroom

[00:16:36] And everything

[00:16:37] That sounds weird

[00:16:38] I guess because you were a little kiddies

[00:16:40] Seventeen

[00:16:41] No but whatever

[00:16:42] Anyway go on

[00:16:43] Yeah

[00:16:44] But I found out later as I went on

[00:16:46] That there had been a problem in the past

[00:16:48] Of children being abducted

[00:16:49] By their parents from the program

[00:16:51] By their parents?

[00:16:52] Yes

[00:16:53] Like parents who were going through a divorce

[00:16:55] And the dad like came

[00:16:57] As featured in one of this year's

[00:16:59] Academy of Work film nowadays

[00:17:00] Everything will be okay

[00:17:01] Yes

[00:17:02] Parents going through a divorce

[00:17:03] The father thinks he's gonna lose the custody

[00:17:04] He goes to visit his child

[00:17:05] Right

[00:17:06] And then just snatches them away

[00:17:07] Takes her in a car

[00:17:08] Goes missing

[00:17:09] Like Rockefeller

[00:17:10] Rockefeller did that

[00:17:11] Is that right?

[00:17:12] I think so

[00:17:13] A while back

[00:17:14] Of Rockefeller Records

[00:17:15] Yeah

[00:17:16] And then there was a kid

[00:17:17] More bits

[00:17:18] I'm giving everyone bits

[00:17:19] I'm just trying to do bits

[00:17:20] I'm just trying to get this scratch

[00:17:22] There was another incident

[00:17:23] In which a girl

[00:17:24] Did something stupid

[00:17:25] And got arrested while on the program

[00:17:26] And her parents sued NYU

[00:17:27] Because they said she was never a bad kid

[00:17:29] Before NYU ruined her

[00:17:31] That has ruined a lot of people

[00:17:33] To be fair

[00:17:34] That is true

[00:17:35] Are we just gonna rag on NYU?

[00:17:36] Is this NYU

[00:17:37] Feelings coming out?

[00:17:38] Bunch of jerks

[00:17:39] Yeah

[00:17:40] My father working

[00:17:41] Get out of the village

[00:17:42] Yeah, yeah don't, go on

[00:17:43] Go on, sorry

[00:17:44] Anyway

[00:17:45] So I was in this program

[00:17:46] Where we weren't allowed to leave at all

[00:17:47] Everything was in a group

[00:17:48] It was like being in a preschool

[00:17:49] Like a preschool and I had like her few hours and I remember one of the things I was really stressed about was we made

[00:17:54] One trip to see a movie the whole month that I was there because I was missing all these fucking movies

[00:17:58] I couldn't see movies. Yeah, it's my thing. That's your thing

[00:18:01] And I'm a huge M night guy and I had hated the village at the time

[00:18:05] Like the village more on this recent rewatch, right? You you like most of America had been very disappointed by the village

[00:18:12] Almost angry I would say mm-hmm, and I was so ready for like

[00:18:17] Reinvention he's doing something different here the movies in theaters right now. You've got the devil wears Prada Superman returns

[00:18:25] Okay, ours is still going cars you've got click

[00:18:29] Clickin America's clicking you've got those Pirates of the Caribbean second the second one man's chest

[00:18:34] Yeah, that was the one movie we went to go fucking see which I hate that franchise

[00:18:38] You've got little man. Oh, of course. We had little man. You mean to be man the woman Cynthia Nixon

[00:18:44] My imagining well little man is the sex in the city is the speaking of burger

[00:18:52] Little man's the movie where Marlon Waynes is a little guy man, and he pretends to be a baby

[00:18:56] Oh, I'm think there's a movie. I think it's called little Manhattan. Yes. Oh, yeah, and yes indeed

[00:19:00] And I was just like I was now I was just frantic

[00:19:03] I was like is Cynthia Nixon in that weird Waynes Brothers movie where like Marlon Waynes his face is super

[00:19:08] Baby she plays the police captain I could see her Dana

[00:19:10] Do you know who I think is the little boy in little Manhattan? I'm not a hundred percent correct about this you Josh Hutcherson. Oh

[00:19:16] No, you're right. You're wrong. It's me. I was my second choice. I'm sure you're right about that actually

[00:19:21] Yeah, I was the little girl on little man. Anyway, so you didn't get to see any movies and

[00:19:26] Parts the Caribbean which I hated and I spent a month arguing to people that didn't even fucking make sense as a movie

[00:19:31] Not a big sense maker that one people would be like no the plot makes sense

[00:19:35] I was like they literally never explained that and then I realized two years later when I saw it on cable that I'd fallen asleep for 15 minutes

[00:19:40] And didn't know a lot of the scenes I argued didn't happen in the movie didn't

[00:19:44] See you were in the wrong. Yeah, but the movie also you were the max land is of that situation correct

[00:19:48] Yes, okay, and I take my hit. Yeah, I'll take my lumps on that one

[00:19:52] Okay, but so one of the other groups and one of the other concentrations

[00:19:56] Everyone got to vote for what movie they fucking went to go see one group voted for Lady in the water

[00:20:00] And I was so jealous of them and they came back and that the cafeteria the next day was the photography department or whatever

[00:20:06] It was this tish summer program was like, oh my god. It's a fucking worse snarf snarf snarf snarf

[00:20:12] Look at me. I'm story. Oh no, it's grunt. They were really ripping in they remembered it

[00:20:17] Yeah

[00:20:20] Caviteer they were going snarf snarf snarf snarf

[00:20:22] You know these idiots they don't even deserve an M night picture. Hmm

[00:20:26] I didn't think they are so I didn't see the movie until like two months later when it was already almost out of theaters

[00:20:31] Right went to see it by myself at Times Square the MC 25 maybe two other people in the audience

[00:20:35] That's that's my background for how I came into the film everyone had told me it was stupid

[00:20:41] And I was angry and I hated his last movie

[00:20:44] And how'd you feel about the movie?

[00:20:47] Yeah, but do you still kind of like it well, I want to hear your opinions first

[00:20:52] I walk out the phone when I go this movie obviously has fundamental issues

[00:20:56] Sure, the largest issues are the ones in which M night channel and presents himself as the one person who can write the stories

[00:21:01] I can save the world. You know what? I think that's one of the better parts of this movie

[00:21:05] Really? I don't think it's good. I

[00:21:08] Think everything in this we almost everything in this movie is

[00:21:11] Mind-boggling. I like bad awful. I agree that it is awful

[00:21:15] I also agree that it is so discombobulatingly bad that there is I suppose something sort of special about it

[00:21:22] Like it's not like you're watching some run-of-the-mill crappy movie

[00:21:25] But it's bad. I can let you to it also

[00:21:28] I want to hear you emotionally defunct in my opinion

[00:21:32] Like and it has to not be to work if that makes sense

[00:21:36] That's like the biggest problem with this movie, right? It's supposed to be this very sweet tale of like

[00:21:42] Personal redemption, right? Yeah, like you know, it's like very character-focused. It's pretty small only takes place in an apartment block and

[00:21:50] It's got lots of cute little characters

[00:21:52] And it's got this it's like it's got this idea of itself is like oh

[00:21:54] There's a fun ensemble with like any hard great actors to play the ensemble as he usually does

[00:22:00] He's a good hire. I mean it's interesting that then I guess he was still people still wanted to work with him

[00:22:04] Then I mean I want to work with them now, but no no, but yeah

[00:22:08] Absolutely, I mean even off of the village like the village for its flaws had had made Bryce Dallas Howard a thing and you know like

[00:22:15] Had a great cast and

[00:22:17] You know it's interesting. I wrote some notes when I was watching it

[00:22:20] Yeah, sure in all caps I wrote this is the plot of Manchester by the sea

[00:22:24] Oh, is it which I'd Ken Kenler and Ergun's new movie spoil anything

[00:22:28] But there's a family tragedy in the past where a guy loses his family and then becomes the super of a building

[00:22:34] Right that is the plot of Manchester

[00:22:36] Ken caught this movie and was like yeah, I can do better

[00:22:40] I think there's a fair parallels, but it's a very strange parallel, but it's there. Is there any overlapping cast?

[00:22:46] Some of these actors seem like people that Lonnie kin would work with I mean let's yeah

[00:22:51] No, you're right

[00:22:51] But I didn't know there isn't any sadly go through this cast quickly just because it really is a murderer

[00:22:55] Okay, so I'm gonna favorite character. All right, so and I'm gonna I'm gonna say the cast

[00:22:59] I'm gonna try and think of at least one of their stupid idiocincuses

[00:23:02] So you got Paul Giamatti as a stuttering janitor

[00:23:05] Well, yeah handyman stutter. I mean he

[00:23:08] He essentially plays the role as if he's a cartoon jalopy his stutter is

[00:23:14] It's Paul Giamatti Archie's car

[00:23:16] And they start the stutter at line two like the film opens with him working at a sink underneath the sink and he goes

[00:23:23] Oh, man, it looks like you're

[00:23:25] Tadah

[00:23:28] Are broken

[00:23:30] Now you're an actor Griffin is the stutter something that you aspire to do

[00:23:33] I because I feel like it's like it's like some actors like Everest like they really want to do like some weird tick like that

[00:23:38] Absolutely not. Absolutely not in fact, I feel like when I get auditions that say that there's a stutter required

[00:23:43] I usually say it. Nope. I feel like it's it's kind of a think-less task

[00:23:48] Because it's a real condition that is hard to dramatize and audiences find infuriating because like

[00:23:54] You even you have even let I mean stutters are a little difficult to deal with even in real life because obviously

[00:23:59] It's like a little awkward to interact with someone with a stutter

[00:24:02] But you know, you're you know, you're an empathetic human being when you watch in a fucking movie

[00:24:05] You're like oh for crying out. Let's see. I have to have a stutter. I have to suffer through this

[00:24:08] Yeah, and it's also it always feels kind of insensitive. Yeah. Yeah, they're almost always unrealistic

[00:24:14] Sign of weakness right some obvious point is being I think pretty much

[00:24:19] I mean the dominant 90% of the reason why Colin Firth won the Oscars

[00:24:22] It was kind of the only stutter in film history that felt like oh, that seems pretty accurate

[00:24:25] Yeah, right like that perfectly right and it was like yeah, we understand all the roots of this

[00:24:31] I mean movie was a whole movie about his stutter like medically

[00:24:34] But on a performance level kind of unprecedented that someone got it just right in like the Goldilocks way

[00:24:39] Like they landed in just the right bed. You're talking about Colin Firth in the Amanda Bynes movie, right?

[00:24:43] Yeah

[00:24:44] The movie in which where she doesn't get into Harvard but then at the end of the movie

[00:24:47] She's like but I got into Oxford so it's okay. Yeah, and he goes forget that

[00:24:52] Father

[00:24:55] Matt Besser doing doing the King's speech thing on comedy bang bang and it's like he does he has Tourette's not it's it

[00:25:02] You gotta see it doesn't ever you just gotta see it

[00:25:05] It's not that he has to retts

[00:25:05] They just do the bit where he has to swear to like try and get over it

[00:25:09] And he says like the most horrible things and it's anyway

[00:25:11] Well, frankly, I won't listen to it because it's not on the used to be comedy network

[00:25:15] All right, Bryce Dallas Howard as story a

[00:25:19] C name M Knights muse. Yeah the muse the film's muse, right?

[00:25:23] Who he never worked with ever again after two films established as his muse

[00:25:28] I wonder if he blames her. What if she blames him? They should both blame each other

[00:25:33] I want to see that move. I don't blame to go around

[00:25:35] You want to see that movie M Knight versus Bryce that he said about members just like deep held resentments

[00:25:40] And then like maybe a coming together at the end. They're the sit and antsy of 75 million dollar studio pictures. Yep

[00:25:45] Yeah, this film costs 70 million dollars. I believe why how I got some I got some fun facts

[00:25:50] These questions will be answered in Griffin's next new segment. All right later in the episode going through the cast

[00:25:55] Bob Balaban is harry farber

[00:25:58] a mercurial film critic a

[00:26:00] A feat little fool

[00:26:03] Like I don't know his defining characteristic is that he is the least sympathetic character ever portrayed in a film

[00:26:09] I've I have seen I found him quite sympathetic. I have seen a child's drawing of a film critic

[00:26:14] I suppose

[00:26:16] An angry resentful child. He hates everything including movies, especially movies. He hates life. He hates other people

[00:26:22] He's interacting with people. It seems to hate happiness

[00:26:25] I've seen uh, a nazis who are portrayed on film in a more even-handed manner than this character

[00:26:32] Jeffrey Wright as mr. Dury a crossword obsessed

[00:26:36] Guy that's it. He has a son. He has a son. He likes puzzles

[00:26:40] Uh sarita chowdery who's also doing the crossword in like the philadelphia newspaper. I don't think it's that hard

[00:26:46] Boy, right? It's not the saturday times

[00:26:49] Maybe he gets maybe he buys the new york times just for the crossword. Yeah, I should

[00:26:52] Chots fire. No, but that is uh sarita chowdery who is a good actress

[00:26:57] I like her a lot as uh on a ran who is m night's sister

[00:27:00] It's one of her weirdest performances ever if not the weirdest it's it's it's very strange. It's odd like it

[00:27:06] Uh, but she's a great actress. We all agree. She's just very she's very passionate. She's very uh outspoken in this film, right?

[00:27:13] I didn't realize until the end of the movie that he that she was his sister and no

[00:27:17] I thought she was his wife too. Oh really? It took me way too long to figure out

[00:27:22] Because there's even that conversation where they talk about how many kids she's gonna have

[00:27:25] And I thought that was them bantering about how many kids they were gonna have

[00:27:29] Tracked perfect. Well, I mean I with my always like flirtedly playing with laundry in the laundry room with my sister, you know

[00:27:35] It's just it's just what people do right? You're always just tossing panties at each other. Yeah

[00:27:39] living together Cindy Chung as uh

[00:27:42] What's her name a young soon shoy a

[00:27:45] local girl at the at the uh

[00:27:47] Local gal at the apartment building who serves as a translator for her grandma

[00:27:53] Her tick is that she's in school. She speaks perfect english with a horrible accent

[00:27:58] Yeah, her tick is that she's chinese

[00:28:01] Yeah, like honestly and she wears like hot pants and like he's always like in like she's in school

[00:28:06] She has like studies. There's this sort of vague like book reading she has to do she speaks immaculately

[00:28:12] But with a mickey rooney voice. Yeah

[00:28:14] Yeah, uh m night shamalan as vik ran. Oh, he's in this. Yeah, he's in this film

[00:28:20] Uh, you'd argue he could argue he's about like the fourth lead third fourth lead in this film

[00:28:24] I'd almost argue he's the third. Yeah, he is the inciting event for the whole thing. He the movie is

[00:28:30] The movie which has two main characters is centered around him, right?

[00:28:35] Well, the lady is in the water because of him. She's in the water because of him

[00:28:39] And I'd also argue he's kind of like the the strongest emotional empathy character him and and geomata

[00:28:45] You're the two characters that actually have like emotional arcs. I think the audience supposed to relate to

[00:28:49] Yes

[00:28:50] Story is more of a plot device. Uh, he is uh an aspiring novelist who is writing a book called the cookbook

[00:28:57] Which is about his ideas about leaders and stuff. It never really seems to be a novel

[00:29:02] It sounds like it's just him. It sounds more like a you know, mind camp

[00:29:08] Yeah

[00:29:10] Right, okay, so we'll get back to him. Why is it called the cookbook? We don't we never find out

[00:29:14] Just for some weird sort of like mistake that is immediately cleared up one. Mr.

[00:29:18] That lasts for 15 seconds, right? Yeah one. Yeah, it's like oh, is it just a cookbook? He's like no no

[00:29:23] No, it's a book called the cookbook. I mean

[00:29:24] I mean actually the whole movie is sort of defined by like

[00:29:27] Weird things that are then resolved ten minutes later right by just an explanation on like a person just speaks an explanation

[00:29:33] I want to get this out now before we go on with the cast. I use the next one's real good

[00:29:37] Yeah, I used to say that this film was was one of the nite films without a twist

[00:29:42] This is actually his twistiest movie. There's a twist every 35 seconds

[00:29:45] True well, but there's their twist where it's like he's not the protector. He's the angel or what?

[00:29:50] You know, I already forgot all the names and you're like, oh, okay

[00:29:52] You don't even understand what they were trying to make you believe until after the twist is real

[00:29:57] It feels like he wrote this like immense tome like of like this sort of the legendary

[00:30:02] You know the legendary uh, whatever of this world these worlds

[00:30:05] But then he like he gave us like one page of it

[00:30:08] Yeah, but he's got it all in his head. Definitely maybe and let's remember

[00:30:12] There is a supplemental book that was released. There was a fully illustrated children's book

[00:30:16] Because this was billed as a bedtime story from m night shine. Yes. It was inspired by

[00:30:21] And he like supposedly this is what he told his daughter, I think

[00:30:25] And so I kind of think he was just making this shit up and was like, oh

[00:30:28] I'll just make a movie because and he said it was inspired by she was like what happens in our swimming pool at night

[00:30:33] Which is a fair question for me young room lives in a mansion in hell

[00:30:37] We've all been there

[00:30:38] And and he so he came up with this thing of like, I don't know like a c-nymph comes out of there

[00:30:42] And then she meets like a weird stuttering janitor. All right. All right. This is good. We're cooking now

[00:30:46] I'm the savior of humanity

[00:30:49] So freddy redriguez

[00:30:51] Plays reggie a bodybuilder who's only building one side of his body. Yep

[00:30:56] So it's got big muscles

[00:30:58] It feels like it's just one arm because it doesn't even look like he's got pecs on one side

[00:31:01] It looks like it's just right. He's like yeah

[00:31:04] I mean, he doesn't even say like oh, I'm practicing to be in like an arm wrestling competition

[00:31:09] He's just like I just want to do this. He says at one point it's like a science experiment. Yes. Uh, he looks like, uh, uh

[00:31:16] Tertiary the goon character joey the ball for those of you who read the comic book the goon

[00:31:22] Nope. Yeah, sorry

[00:31:23] Uh, but yeah, he's got one huge muscly prosthetic arm and then that is his entire

[00:31:28] Zardly cartoony in it's weird. Yeah, it's and freddy redriguez at this point is like

[00:31:33] Emmy nominated actor from six feet under like recognizable so far by the way

[00:31:36] We're just like good cast great cast not a good actors

[00:31:39] Uh bill urwin as mr. Leeds. What a great actor. Don't really remember him in the movie that much

[00:31:44] I had just seen him a year prior as

[00:31:47] Uh in who's afraid of virginia wolf with cathleen turner. He was very good like in 2005

[00:31:53] Or late 2004. Yeah, uh his his characteristic in this is that he's very serious

[00:31:59] Yeah, he sits in his room watching the news

[00:32:01] Immaculately designed room. It's not a bad performance

[00:32:03] Oh, yeah, that's the thing the the news is always on the tv in the in the background and it's over

[00:32:08] Yeah, and he's always judging everything but in a calm and and sort of a steady metered way

[00:32:14] He and paul jimadhi's characters share some sort of

[00:32:18] Tragic appreciation for each other. Yeah, right

[00:32:22] Uh, jaren harris as goatee smoker. What a fine actor great actor

[00:32:27] And uh one of the where I was like, oh jaren harris. Like I didn't realize that he was doing american things that long ago

[00:32:31] I know it's crazy. He's been around for a very long time. He'd been in that beatles movie like years before den

[00:32:37] Yeah, he just didn't pop forever, but he's always great

[00:32:40] Uh, mary beth hurt as mrs. Bell the butterfly lady

[00:32:43] Uh, noah gray cabay who was on heroes as uh, jeffrey right son who loves cereal boxes. That's his character

[00:32:52] Tova felch who's still around

[00:32:54] She was just a zombie just on she was just uh, not zombie and then a zombie on the walking dead

[00:32:58] So good, uh as mrs. Bub chick no toa felch's character trait in this movie is that her husband's always shitting

[00:33:05] Yes, that's right

[00:33:06] And she has a lot to say about him all of these character traits are introduced

[00:33:10] One by one in very sort of dutiful fashion sort of at the beginning of the movie, right?

[00:33:14] That's the first 20 minutes of the movie. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah

[00:33:16] Uh, sort of in the same way that the village works except the village is involving

[00:33:20] But this is i'm i'm withholding my opinions until later in the episode

[00:33:23] I'm not enjoying this bit. This this is like, um, it's it's like a series of vignettes

[00:33:27] I could almost the beginning of the film most feels like it's just like an omni bus story where it's like

[00:33:31] Look at all these little lives, but everyone has like this big cartoonish characteristic. Yeah, uh, we've done all of them now

[00:33:36] It's set up to a tv series. It's a pilot episode. It's not a movie. Yeah, right

[00:33:40] It's like these crazy apartment people like yeah, that'll be great

[00:33:44] It's great, right? Just rolls around the tongue

[00:33:46] Uh, yeah, david octon steyer's is the narrator who narrates the little animated sequence. Oh, is that who that is?

[00:33:51] That opens the film. Yeah, and you've got i mean doug jones is one of the

[00:33:55] Hartuix sure whatever they're called, uh, you know, you've got ethan cone

[00:34:00] That you know, he was kind of like a chubby guy for a lot of his movie. Uh, he'll see

[00:34:05] You know the guy with blonde air and glasses. No, no, no, you're thinking the other one's the guy who wrote garfield

[00:34:09] That's all right. Right. Sorry

[00:34:11] Uh, but we've we've uh tova is the last sort of big name in this cast. Yeah

[00:34:16] Um, but then there's like also there's a bunch of other people. Yes, there's like a whole family that's uh, I think maxis

[00:34:22] Five sisters. Uh, yeah, it's all sisters. There's a band

[00:34:26] I feel like there's something else that we're missing some other like sort of pool

[00:34:31] All right, and me and richard were talking a bunch of squants in this movie

[00:34:34] Yep, sure me and richard were talking about this. Okay, she's not really in the water that much very little

[00:34:39] And like we don't even really see her we don't hear swimming

[00:34:42] We don't see her swimming

[00:34:43] I thought that she was gonna have to go back into the water to get to the blue world where she's from story

[00:34:49] But instead like an eagle has to get her like what's going on here? Yeah, where the fuck is the eagle going guys?

[00:34:54] We got it. We got a slow down. We got it back way the fuck up

[00:34:56] So this film starts with an animated introduction and everybody that I drew

[00:35:03] Or someone of my

[00:35:06] It's stick figures. Yeah with a lot of swirly lines around it is cave painting

[00:35:10] Sort of like the cocopelly thing you know the god that they have at mexican restaurants

[00:35:15] It's like planting a flute and has squiggly hair. It looks sort of like the q-doba logo. Yeah, yeah, yeah

[00:35:21] It's all accent marks

[00:35:24] Um, and everything is said in a manner of great portent

[00:35:28] Yeah, but I want to say that uh, this is setting up a lot of stuff

[00:35:31] And I couldn't tell you one thing that it says completely does not sink in whatever is improv

[00:35:37] Yeah, and it was live drawn

[00:35:39] That's a pretty improv uh on our you know months long almost year-long

[00:35:44] Deep dive into the phantom ass trilogy. We talked about there was a phenomenon that would occur in that movie

[00:35:49] In those movies. Yeah where like a stretch of dialogue is so much fucking nonsense information

[00:35:56] Exposition with terms that don't even make any sense character names planets technologies

[00:36:00] And it's just exposition and I just go blank and none of it processes

[00:36:04] Yeah, and we're watching the same film week after week and it was like week nine

[00:36:07] I was like, I think I get what they're saying in this scene

[00:36:09] We made a lot of mistakes on this podcast simply because it just they never was communicated to us like the information

[00:36:15] To that movie. I was watching this movie on a plane while having a panic attack great

[00:36:19] Um, I will say the film did calm me down sort of weirdly. I mean, it's it's a quailude energy

[00:36:25] Like for the whole movie. Yeah, it did his job in that sense

[00:36:28] The stakes seem very low even when there's monsters and you know grassy dogs and like god knows what else

[00:36:35] The stakes feel low M. Night Shyamalan has to write the book that will save humanity the cookbook day

[00:36:40] He has to write the book that will inspire like Obama and or trump

[00:36:45] Trump they never clarify they say someone's gonna do a lot of stuff

[00:36:49] Okay, so I on the plane rewound I download this film off of amazon

[00:36:54] Uh because you can now download movies for 24 hour rant off great

[00:36:58] And I watched it. Uh, I I saw it wasn't just playing on the plane

[00:37:02] I okay, so I you asked I sent in a request to american airlines and I said hey

[00:37:06] I'm taking over with corporate, uh bodies, right? We'll get to the sony thing at the end of the episode. Will we yeah

[00:37:12] um, but uh, that's called griffin's petition corny

[00:37:16] Um, so I watched this on the plane. I was a little tired, right? I'm having a panic attack whatever

[00:37:22] And I started up and and the fucking like the opening narration just goes right right over my head past my ears

[00:37:29] Absolutely, and I was like, okay griffin

[00:37:32] Stress out. This is your job. You got to watch this. You got to understand this is a key to figure out the movie

[00:37:37] Start it over. Yeah

[00:37:39] Watch this second time. Sure made less sense. No, I did the same thing

[00:37:42] I rewound it and I was like nope

[00:37:45] I mean the crux is sort of like our world blue world people in blue world come to our world

[00:37:51] No, yes

[00:37:53] I want to throw out a rule. Okay new rule

[00:37:57] New no-nose. No, this is a yes. Yes. Yeah, okay new rule

[00:38:00] Okay, if you are making a film that ostensibly is in english right not in a foreign language

[00:38:08] More than every other word has to be a word that we already know before we sat down in this

[00:38:14] Right, you know, that's fair. But no, but narf scrunch, uh, what was that other word? I already uh

[00:38:20] Tartuic

[00:38:23] Yeah, I mean and things like blue world. It's like okay those two words

[00:38:27] Exist independently, but when you hyphenate them then I no longer know what it means sounds like a movie

[00:38:31] You'd see the science we see them. Yes. Yes. Yeah, but it's fucking stuff about jelly didn't happen

[00:38:36] Narrated by I don't know so I David Elgin styrofoam

[00:38:40] The dad from better off dead

[00:38:42] So I watched this three times in a row and then just threw it my hands and went

[00:38:45] I don't know just watch the rest of the movie you've seen it before you were able to track it enough without the introduction

[00:38:49] I forgot that the introduction was in there. Yeah, after the film was over

[00:38:53] I was like so now that you've just watched it go back and watch the introduction

[00:38:56] It made even less sense to me

[00:38:58] So we don't need to discuss this any further. It's nonsense. You want on 21 minutes? Okay, so

[00:39:05] Um, so it's a very complicated bedtime story that adults can't understand right

[00:39:09] So I don't know that children can I've never heard of a child liking this movie

[00:39:12] It is ostensibly for children to be fair you probably haven't been asking a lot of children

[00:39:16] But I like I've like interacted with children in my life and they've said I like x-movie such as frozen. Yeah, yeah, right

[00:39:24] We're on court street

[00:39:26] Apparently you and michael shannon are just fucking chilling with kids all the time

[00:39:29] He was with like eight kids mooburgers

[00:39:31] They got a place where it's like that you go in there and you're like are there there are this many children in the world

[00:39:36] Like like this is this must be all of them, right?

[00:39:39] I mean, he's got a lot of young fans now after 99 homes kids

[00:39:42] Do you see how many fucking nick loading kids choice award nominations that movie got?

[00:39:46] I love the yeah, michael shannon with the big surfboard

[00:39:50] That's the teen choice

[00:39:53] Sorry, richard. We're here for bits by request of listeners, but let's make it clear when a bit's a bit

[00:39:58] You're not doing your bit. Are you gonna do your bit richard pitched a bit to me

[00:40:01] I pitched a bit, but I don't think I'm gonna do it. No, I think I think it might be too late

[00:40:04] I was gonna just only refer to brice delis howard as jessica chastain

[00:40:09] Would have been good. What have I needed? Oh, wow

[00:40:11] Um, all right. So yeah, so we're it's about a philadelphia apartment complex. It doesn't look like philadelphia

[00:40:17] I'm sure it was filmed there, but it looks like florida

[00:40:21] Yeah, it's good. It really does it is it was shot in levittown pennsylvania

[00:40:24] Yeah

[00:40:24] So i'm gonna introduce this segment because I think it's going to be spread out

[00:40:27] But the segment that I talked about I want to introduce new is because I watched it on amazon, right?

[00:40:31] And amazon has this feature for selected movies. They're trying if you watch things on amazon x-ray on amazon video

[00:40:37] It's called amazon x-ray and what it's supposed to be

[00:40:41] You're going no because I think this feature gave me some real scoops on this movie, okay

[00:40:45] amazon x-ray is supposed to be like

[00:40:48] At any point you're watching the movie you can tap or you can pause it tells you which actors are in that scene

[00:40:53] Oh, interesting tells you what music track is playing. Oh, and it integrates

[00:40:58] IMDb trivia into the film

[00:41:00] So like pop up video. Yes the hallowed

[00:41:04] Unimpeachably always correct IMDb trivia. Well, that's the new segment. It's IMDb trivia corner

[00:41:09] Okay, so I have this saved here that some facts that have come up already from where we are in the film

[00:41:14] That I think are relevant because at this point i'm just withholding information

[00:41:17] I have the inside scoop now. I know what's going on from these trivia facts, okay? And it's not here's the introduction again

[00:41:24] um

[00:41:25] It's it they don't throw them at you. It's if you pause the film it tells you the trivia fact, okay ready?

[00:41:29] um

[00:41:31] Do do do do do here's one kevin costner was considered for the role of heap or paul geomotty accepted the part before they

[00:41:36] Imagine kevin costner doing a stutter and then and that says in parentheses geomotty really was the first option

[00:41:43] Okay, all right, but someone just had some point. He was hot off sideways

[00:41:47] Yeah, he was this is this was his big casting off of sideways

[00:41:52] I remember where it was like, oh, maybe paul geomotty gets to be the star of a movie and this was that movie

[00:41:57] I think this is the first thing he booked after sideways. You know saying yeah

[00:42:00] um, here's in between he had made Cinderella man and gotten his Oscar nomination

[00:42:06] The 100 forgettable Cinderella man. Yep

[00:42:10] So here are two facts that are questions that the two of you have asked that I now hold the answers go ahead. Okay

[00:42:16] director trademark

[00:42:18] Pennsylvania

[00:42:19] Okay, so that's a trip. Uh-huh shaman. Alon demanded that the set be within 45 minutes of his pennsylvania home

[00:42:26] He timed the trip which took 43 minutes

[00:42:29] Wow, okay. Good job

[00:42:32] It was all worth it

[00:42:33] They say the film takes place in Philadelphia, but as you said it looks nothing like it really looks like florida

[00:42:37] But I guess we're this high rise apartment building that seems to be in the middle of nowhere because right in the backyard

[00:42:41] It's like it's a forest. Yeah, and everyone seems to be dressed as if it's really hot

[00:42:46] Right like everyone's always hanging up by the pool

[00:42:49] Everyone's wearing like tank tops and shorts and shit and like this is not a pennsylvania climate. Well

[00:42:55] That brings me to my next pack

[00:42:59] The reason for the film's shockingly high budget 75 million dollar

[00:43:03] Did they build this whole apartment building being said in one location?

[00:43:06] It's because the apartment complex and the pool were built for the film

[00:43:09] Wow, my god, do you think they're still in use again? It was all worth it

[00:43:13] Uh, let me if this film made provided some housing for people

[00:43:18] Then you know some kids got to go swimming

[00:43:20] I think it's good

[00:43:21] Some of this film was shot in leviton pennsylvania at jacobson logistics warehouse site and night shamla has committed to using film sites

[00:43:27] And pa the set built on a warehouse site includes the apartment complex and a half city block of row houses

[00:43:32] Occasional footage was shot inside the orflory area of the warehouse most the film was completed after jacobson workout

[00:43:37] Okay

[00:43:38] Well, thanks for all that info. Anyway, let's get to the movie

[00:43:41] Character error given the length of the words mentioned nine across cannot touch

[00:43:46] 27 down in a crossword puzzle as mr. Dury says

[00:43:49] Interpreting the puzzle while story is in the shower

[00:43:51] It would have to be at least 19 layers long to do so before our listeners

[00:43:54] I want to get ahead of that fact before people get thrown off. Yeah the purists

[00:43:59] All right, so it's an apartment complex in

[00:44:03] Philadelphia area 43 minutes outside have to be exact for sure uh-huh paul jimadi

[00:44:08] plays

[00:44:09] No, 43 minutes from m night shamlund's house. Yeah, we don't know where he lives from the city center of the city

[00:44:14] He lives in the liberty bell

[00:44:17] That man bleeds philadelphia

[00:44:20] Um is the happenings well, we'll get to next week. Um

[00:44:25] So paul jimadi is cleveland heap great name great name. What a name

[00:44:31] What a heap

[00:44:33] Do you think paul jimadi was like got the phone call and was like, oh, i'm gonna shut me

[00:44:37] Yeah, absolutely the lead in your movie. What's he called cleveland heap?

[00:44:41] Yeah, we thought of you paul. He's not like lance brachsen. He's cleveland heap. Yeah, it's sad

[00:44:47] He is a stuttering sad handyman at this

[00:44:51] Uh apartment complex who everyone's kind of nice to yeah, but they don't seem to respect that much

[00:44:55] They're nice in a way where it's like, oh, we feel bad for that right. They obviously feel bad for him

[00:44:59] Uh and pretty much immediately

[00:45:02] Uh

[00:45:03] pale naked

[00:45:06] 24-ish year old

[00:45:09] Red haired lady appears in his apartment. Yeah first 15 minutes of the film are all these interactions

[00:45:14] He's meeting characters and like between bob ballad bands moving in stuff right so you meet people through him

[00:45:19] He says he's a film critic. Yeah, but he hates all movies. They're all predictable

[00:45:23] He understands how all them are going to work. They never surprised. Yeah

[00:45:26] Which is some sort of weird like

[00:45:28] Shyamalan saying

[00:45:30] You were I know you were annoyed at the twist in the village or whatever right? He's like

[00:45:33] He's doing it like a I'm smarter than you are in your retu thing where he's like man

[00:45:37] There's some axe grinding in a retus portrayal of a film critic and birdman is

[00:45:42] Sensitive and three-dimensional compared to bob ballad band in this right? Yes, the ranking of

[00:45:48] in birdman

[00:45:49] Directors creating film critic characters to shit on film straw man film critics

[00:45:53] Yeah, I'd go in terms of sympathy right? I'd go um the number one is probably uh, uh mayor ebert and aid saskol

[00:46:02] And god's illa. Oh, yeah, I play by michael larner and somebody else

[00:46:06] I can't remember who yeah the guy who plays saskol at a certain point he quits and he goes thumbs down two thumbs down

[00:46:11] Yeah, and ebert constantly wants like candy. He's like constantly eating candy because he was fat. Oh funny

[00:46:16] Yeah, he also dies of cancer at the end of the movie which was really griffin

[00:46:19] That's not my joke that's roland emmerich. He's a fucking asshole. It doesn't happen. He saw it

[00:46:23] We saw stone wall you think that guy wouldn't do that. It's funny that roland emmerich chose 1998 to be mad at critics

[00:46:28] It's like no just wait roland

[00:46:30] It's gonna get a whole lot worse. It's really it's gonna this is gonna bite you

[00:46:33] Um, I go godzilla then birdman or the unexpected virtue

[00:46:38] Then then lady in the water a bedtime story by a nice

[00:46:41] Um, that's not in the title. Um, so yeah, so pretty quickly though

[00:46:46] Let's talk about it. Oh, but there are a couple these little interludes where it's like no because this is important

[00:46:49] He's building mystery. He's building an air of aura you go. Maybe he's gonna tease this out for a long time

[00:46:54] Yeah, oh, there's hair in the drain

[00:46:56] Beautiful crimson hair. Where's this from? Oh, there's a thing on a chair and it disappears

[00:47:00] Oh who took it and then back to three more introductions, right? Yeah

[00:47:03] And if 15 minutes pretty early into the film

[00:47:06] He's in his apartment. He sees a moment behind him in the background lovely little

[00:47:11] Um, yeah separate shack. Yeah, but it's a beautiful

[00:47:14] It's off site. It is kind of nice

[00:47:16] Uh, beautifully filmed by chris. Well, dole. Christopher dole is the cinematographer on this and he doesn't make a lot of american movies

[00:47:23] One of very few

[00:47:24] Long car wise regular cinematographer one of the great dps for sure

[00:47:28] Yeah, a man who has said that you cannot make a movie unless you've slept with a black woman and spent a night in jail

[00:47:33] That's a real quote from him. Yeah

[00:47:35] I mean he seems like a character

[00:47:36] Uh, David or looks said some stuff on mike about him last week

[00:47:39] He said even more stuff about him off mike that i'll tell you if you didn't hear it

[00:47:43] Yeah

[00:47:44] And but anyway great great dp

[00:47:46] Great dp a bad human being probably

[00:47:49] Um, so in the background out of focus you see this movement and then suddenly she just appears right and so well no, uh

[00:47:56] You see an arm reach up and grab a necklace or something, right? And then giamatti

[00:48:02] We see him looking at her right. We don't see her there's a lot of that in this movie

[00:48:06] Of weird perspective, right, right and then he falls in the pool

[00:48:10] And then so we first we first see her in his little house. We never see her in the fucking water

[00:48:14] We see her arm in the water, right? He walks into his house and she's there because she's dragged him right to safety

[00:48:19] He wakes up and she's sitting there

[00:48:21] Um, yeah, she spends the whole movie frail and weak

[00:48:24] But she had the strength to drag paul giamatti out of a pool

[00:48:28] Joel pia mati

[00:48:30] That's our new name for him and it should be pointed out that she did this while nude while nude

[00:48:35] And there is that weird sequence. Yeah, that thing where it sort of cuts to them just on the couch together

[00:48:40] For honesty points, yeah like

[00:48:43] Just for the listener home ben was tapping me on the back holding up his hands like come on give me some credit

[00:48:48] Ben was really proud that he pointed out that she was i want to point out that

[00:48:51] I think we've been talking for an hour and we're on like the first act of this movie

[00:48:55] This episode is going to be seven hours. There's so much to discuss

[00:48:58] Um

[00:48:59] But yeah, but yes, but what's special about her one? She's naked

[00:49:03] Two she's played by brace. Also, she's funny, but three he's not stuttering. Yeah immediately immediately for she's a nerf

[00:49:11] She's a nerf. We didn't mention that she is a nerf. She's a nerf of all the

[00:49:15] Made-up names in the world for a beautiful secreture

[00:49:19] He came up with nerf. Yes. He came up with the refrain that pinky does

[00:49:23] That's so well. Yeah, like everyone knows that it's true. That's what you think of when you think of

[00:49:28] I mean, I can just see him like being interviewed about this movie

[00:49:30] I don't know. It just came to me and like meanwhile that's playing in the background

[00:49:34] He had some thunder cats

[00:49:36] That's right. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well. I mean this film is a direct sequel to thunder cats. We should make it

[00:49:42] From the orange hair on down. I mean, it's just I do think I read I found online an early draft of the script

[00:49:46] And there were some alts for that for that name. Did you really? Reptar was one of them

[00:49:51] Zoinks

[00:49:53] Was another one. I'm a zoinks

[00:49:56] Yeah, she was originally gonna identify self-identify it's a scoopy snack. It's a Velma in the water

[00:50:05] Um, yeah, so he is a little surprised

[00:50:09] But pretty quickly accepts that he's movie is people quickly accepting that this crazy thing is happening in their swimming pool

[00:50:15] But there's not even a lot of movies do the thing where someone freaks out for a second and then accepts it quickly

[00:50:19] He never freaks out. He just goes like

[00:50:21] And I think the shorthand

[00:50:23] Chalmant's trying to do is the stutter thing and it kind of works

[00:50:26] It's like the one thing in this movie. I kind of bought where he's like, I'm not stuttering when she's around

[00:50:30] He no longer sounds like speed buggy. Yes, that works

[00:50:33] But also he doesn't go like

[00:50:35] Who are what are you? No, no, yeah, there's not a lot. She's an arf. There's a scrunt outside

[00:50:41] Uh, which is a where wolf but we learn about these things

[00:50:44] Do we I forget if we learn them first from her so conveniently the Chinese mother and daughter

[00:50:50] We should talk about the Chinese mother

[00:50:52] Immediately they know this mythology. Is it her grandma? I think it's her grandma. Is it her grandmother?

[00:50:56] Yeah, I think so well

[00:50:57] They know them they know the myth or the grandmother knows the mythology that emite chamomile has cooked up right somehow

[00:51:02] So she this is like an old chinese folk tale of exposition

[00:51:07] Uh an explanation

[00:51:09] Yes, but in translation only right

[00:51:12] Yeah, so he's that's but I don't remember if if bristyle is howard

[00:51:16] If story is her name if she tells very little right she doesn't say much

[00:51:20] She barely speaks in this movie. It's true

[00:51:22] She must have been quite perplexed by this whole process and she seems like someone who really throws herself into

[00:51:28] Whatever she's doing right you guys were talking about manderle last week. We were talking about manderle

[00:51:33] This is off of manderle. Isn't it? She'd done manderle between this in the village

[00:51:37] Yes, yes. Yes. I think manderle came out earlier this year. She'd spent some time in uh in denmark

[00:51:44] Being used so yep. Yeah, and I'm correct

[00:51:47] And she'd also made as you like it the Kenneth browner flop that aired on hbo

[00:51:50] Yeah, because it was yeah here are three relevant in db trivia facts

[00:51:54] One and I think she booked spider-man three before this came out. I believe so as well

[00:51:59] one emite chamomile

[00:52:01] Delighted after he discovered unknown cindy chung

[00:52:04] Who is either the third or fourth lead depending on where you rank chamomile?

[00:52:07] I would say

[00:52:08] Was shocked to hear that her agent demanded one million dollars for her role in the film

[00:52:12] Good for that agent if my client is gonna be so debased

[00:52:18] Throughout this film. It's worth it. That is audacious. Do you think she got it night was prepared to pay the sag minimum

[00:52:25] $65,000 sure

[00:52:27] Uh news to me that that's the minimum

[00:52:31] And five bucks in a sandwich has been waiting for an hbo pay to every week new man wage

[00:52:36] Yeah, that's my quote is a handshake

[00:52:39] And someone telling that they're proud of me in the voice of my father

[00:52:44] They settled for a hundred thousand dollars

[00:52:47] Well, I mean chamomile got the best of that one. It's more than i'm making a week

[00:52:50] That's pretty good. Okay just about just about fact two

[00:52:54] M night chamomile's wish list for his various male supporting roles included names such as

[00:52:59] De Niro, Pacino

[00:53:01] You think you're joking?

[00:53:04] Any role especially the narve

[00:53:06] I

[00:53:08] Like I'm a scrunch

[00:53:12] That's a segment we should bring back which is

[00:53:15] Play is the chinese granddaughter

[00:53:17] And grandmother. Yeah called Pacino plays it is the segment

[00:53:21] It's uh that time sorry. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're coming out. You're cutting that out

[00:53:28] That is unacceptable

[00:53:31] Oh boy

[00:53:32] M night chamomile's wish list for his various male supporting role

[00:53:34] So you're alleging that al Pacino is a racist

[00:53:37] That is what you're doing. You don't have the cover of george lucas's shitty racism. That's what fucking Pacino would play it

[00:53:43] It's not my choice. I tell Pacino play the segment

[00:53:45] He plays it he plays the part as written and that's how it's written. That's how Pacino talks all the fucking time

[00:53:50] Anyway, go on

[00:53:51] I am

[00:53:53] Al Pacino

[00:53:56] Okay, okay

[00:53:59] Included names such as

[00:54:01] No bits from here on out. Okay. Yeah, I didn't like that bit. I want to be on the record not a bit

[00:54:06] All right, go on William hurt the big hurt. Sure. He's just been in the village. Sydney pot. Yeah, okay

[00:54:12] Not making a lot of movies at that point in his career chris cooper

[00:54:16] All right, yeah gene wilder

[00:54:20] Who had not made a film in 15 years at that point has red hair has read

[00:54:25] He's gonna be the lady. Yeah, that's the joke I was gonna make congratulations five comedy points

[00:54:29] We're getting into before me. Thanks. Terrence Howard. Okay, sort of right around hustle and flow time. It was 05, right?

[00:54:36] Yeah, yep

[00:54:37] Uh alec bald one. He would have been good

[00:54:41] Vince Vaughn. I'm noticing something about all these names. They're all men

[00:54:46] It did say his various male supporting roles. Oh, okay

[00:54:49] I think brice hallowed had the part from the brice hallad. Brice hallowed

[00:54:53] She hallowed the pot. Yeah

[00:54:54] I think she had the part from the gecko and all the other female roles in this film are grossly lived in the apartment building

[00:55:01] They built it around her. Yeah, yeah, she was like the lorex

[00:55:07] She was living in a stump of a tree

[00:55:11] And she woke up one morning and she was in

[00:55:18] And then at the end she kicked herself in the behind and flew into the sky

[00:55:21] She was also voiced by Danny DeVito. That was a good that was a deep lorex cut right there

[00:55:29] Okay, all right, all right guys

[00:55:33] Um

[00:55:34] I get through the rest of us forest widaker and don cheetah. All right. Okay. Well, it's a diverse list

[00:55:38] Yeah, that's that's good, but it didn't that didn't pin out not really

[00:55:41] I mean jeffrey right he made he got jeffrey right in this movie

[00:55:44] And we've noted before that he doesn't uh, he hadn't had a lot of diversity in his films up into this point

[00:55:48] This film is much diverse film. Yeah to it's discreet

[00:55:52] Doesn't work out for really glaring

[00:55:55] Two stereotypes. Yeah

[00:55:56] Yeah, you know what? I mean nothing's great even the characters like this doesn't great. That's right. Yeah. Yeah, all right

[00:56:02] Anyway, let's go on I have one more short fact

[00:56:05] And my channel on was in talks with philip seamore hoffman for an unspecified role

[00:56:10] Hoffman despite the fact get ready to cry that he quote

[00:56:15] loved the script

[00:56:16] liked the role

[00:56:18] Had scheduling conflict. Hmm. What would that have been? I wonder he was gonna take a shit that day

[00:56:26] No, hoffman was gonna be the guy in the bathroom the whole movie. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Okay. Since he probably ballad am right

[00:56:33] That's possible. I suppose. I mean hoffman won an oscar the previous year like but shaman was clearly aiming high

[00:56:38] He was trying to get gene wilder out of retirement like he didn't think any role orson wells

[00:56:45] All right

[00:56:49] Okay, so

[00:56:50] This lady shows up from the water. Yeah, though. We don't see her in the water

[00:56:54] The titular lady in the water let it be said if that wasn't clear or less her name is story. Yeah interesting very subtle

[00:57:03] Well, it's interesting to know that in the fucking stupid in the blue world

[00:57:07] They're just like pretentious like they're like basically like they name they give their kids like celebrity kids

[00:57:11] Yeah, it's all paltrows like her siblings are pilot inspector

[00:57:15] Audio science sassaman have I ever told you that I met pile inspector? No, that's amazing good kid. Good kid. Oh, that's cool

[00:57:21] It was such a bummer

[00:57:23] That's when you spin off podcast is good kid bad roll. I talk about good kids in bad mood

[00:57:27] Um, yeah, I gotta put on a uh watchdog list

[00:57:31] um, so

[00:57:33] My podcast about kids what what happens kids? I like guys. I have a question. I have a question for you

[00:57:38] I have a question

[00:57:40] I like

[00:57:44] Today we're talking about boys

[00:57:48] God damn it

[00:57:50] Uh, I have a question. Yes, what happens in the rest of this movie

[00:57:54] After she shows up basically he turns on no idea

[00:57:57] Ben is shrugging his shoulders. Yeah, he turns on the old chinese lady and she starts

[00:58:03] Spouted the story

[00:58:04] In drips and drabs there's and

[00:58:07] We should talk about how about halfway through the movie because the chinese lady is like

[00:58:09] Oh, yeah, like there's uh

[00:58:11] She seems a little reticent at first to divulge this myth and then the granddaughter's like well you

[00:58:15] You need to appear more innocent to my grandmother because she's used to telling the story to children

[00:58:20] Paul Giamani then just starts like gets milk all over his beard and rolls around on a couch in front of her

[00:58:26] You know like milk moustache like kids do I believe I have a screenshot of it because I was so horrified

[00:58:32] I'll dig that up

[00:58:33] Um, and that was an idea to be a trivia fact that the amount of milk on his mustache changes per every time

[00:58:38] They cut right which I think is notable because it's like they didn't even try to keep up continuity

[00:58:42] It felt like every new take m night was like this is more milk on there wasn't enough

[00:58:46] Not enough milk really play with the space, you know

[00:58:49] The space on your upper lip

[00:58:51] But if the guy with one big arm was not your an indication enough this scene with the milk is the

[00:58:55] Indicate that this movie is like off the rails bonkers. Yes bedtime story. Uh, okay

[00:59:02] It's a bad bedtime story bedtime stories usually very clear

[00:59:06] One singular narrative, you know no b stories just kind of like like a very simple arc that you can buy

[00:59:13] Tova felt should

[00:59:14] Yeah, they should have cut everything around her like just this should have been the tova felt should story start to finish

[00:59:19] I'll say uh, my father used to tell bedtime stories to my brother and I we showed a bedroom until we were like

[00:59:24] 11 or something same with me and my brother bunk beds

[00:59:26] And my father used to come and tell bedtime story

[00:59:28] My brother was only interested in sports and I like cartoons and and comedy and stuff

[00:59:32] It's my father would come in every night and off the dome m night style

[00:59:36] You didn't see him getting a fucking picture deal off of this

[00:59:38] But m night style he'd come and he'd sit on the floor and he'd try to tell a story that weaved together our two interests

[00:59:43] And he had a really good formula

[00:59:44] Which is let me pick an athlete and then we pick a really cartoonish characteristic

[00:59:49] So it'd be like Harry the hot dog

[00:59:51] And it'll be a guy who looked like a hot dog and he wore a jacket

[00:59:53] Everyone thought it was a bun and they made fun of him

[00:59:55] And that turned out he was good at wrestling because his body was so skinny that he could look

[00:59:58] We go out of anything sure it was always something like that

[01:00:00] Okay, like big ears or Eric. Okay griffin and then he was good at hockey. Yeah

[01:00:05] This movie is like m night bought the rights to every story my father ever told and told them simultaneously

[01:00:10] It's like people who have one weird tick and one thing they're good at doing right

[01:00:14] And they're not necessarily connected

[01:00:17] No, they just have a weird characteristic and one skill right that comes and play perfectly right

[01:00:22] But but actually in a way they don't come I mean I guess they figured out by the end

[01:00:26] Like how they're all supposed to be right 75 of them don't work at all

[01:00:29] Right like Mary Beth heard poor spends the second half of the movie thinking she's the healer and then she's just some old

[01:00:35] She's like no it turns anyway. Well, right

[01:00:38] So that I guess the next major thing that happens is story is like I'm here to find a specific writer

[01:00:45] Who's going to write a really important book, right?

[01:00:48] And paul g moddy then goes around

[01:00:51] Just crashing into people's apartments going like

[01:00:53] Uh, you're writing a book or something, you know, like just asking everyone so to write a book

[01:00:57] You're writing anything

[01:00:59] There are these characters who are the smokers and they're like a weird age range of men who all live together and just smoke

[01:01:05] Cigarettes, there's like a beat generation guy. There's like a flower guy. There's like, you know, there's someone from every

[01:01:10] Nominatorie Jared Harris. Yeah, it's m night shaman imagining what it was like to hang out with the cool kids in college

[01:01:16] He maybe never got to hang out

[01:01:17] I don't know but it's like this weird conception of like they're like music posters and cigarettes

[01:01:20] Right, you know, but they are they do range in age from like 18 to 55

[01:01:24] Right and at one point he just straight up is like, do you guys write?

[01:01:28] Have you written anything lately with not having never established that they were writers before but they got ideas, man

[01:01:33] And then it turns out that his friendly

[01:01:37] Indian tenant uh, who's a vic vic ran right played by m night shaman in his largest role apart from praying with anger to date

[01:01:45] Yeah

[01:01:47] Who lives with his sister he doesn't get cast a lot outside of m night shaman films

[01:01:51] This would be his second largest role. You're right

[01:01:53] I was trying to give other movies that m night shaman appears and it's an actor and I think this is the second largest role

[01:01:57] He's writing a book called the cookbook, right? Yeah, which here's the thing Cleveland. He sees the book and goes

[01:02:02] Ah, fuck. It's a cookbook

[01:02:05] The weirdest moment in the movie. Yeah, but then five minutes later

[01:02:08] And he's like immediate following scene. Yeah, I think the idea is he's supposed to be like

[01:02:12] Oh, how am I gonna ask now because he's sort of secretly sneaking a look at this book that vic is sort of like

[01:02:16] Ah, nobody read my book

[01:02:17] It's piece of shit, right and then he's like oh, it's called the cookbook now. I have to clarify whether or not

[01:02:21] This is a cookbook. How am I gonna do that? I don't know. I'll do. Hey, is it a cookbook?

[01:02:25] Yeah, no great from I was

[01:02:27] Using my ladder and then the ladder knocked into the book and the book opened up

[01:02:32] And I saw that it was called the cookbook. Is that

[01:02:36] Which once again, we're not making fun of people with stutters. We're making fun of cleveland heap

[01:02:40] Yeah, but you still uh, your alpachino thing still a great shame to this podcast

[01:02:45] I feel like if you were the super

[01:02:49] If you were the super of a building

[01:02:51] Wouldn't you kind if you were as involved as he is you would kind of know if someone was fucking making a cookbook, right?

[01:02:57] Because they've been cooking all the time. It's true that you would you would you might have heard a complaint about exotic smells

[01:03:02] Right, right. There you go. I don't know it just that doesn't track for me. But the reason he's seeking this writer out

[01:03:09] Is the writer's gonna change the world but

[01:03:12] It's a bit it's long winded is there her job as someone from emissary from the blue world is to be in the presence of that person

[01:03:20] Basically infuse them with inspiration and meaning

[01:03:23] It described as pins and needles feeling and then she can go home

[01:03:26] But she's being she can go home on the wings of a giant eagle, but unfortunately, there's a scrunt in the backyard

[01:03:34] Which is a grassy wolf

[01:03:36] That you can't look at unless you are a specific person the guardian the guardian

[01:03:41] And then all you could do is look at them. Then you gotta look at and and she assumes that

[01:03:47] Uh paul gm that uh cleveland is this figure

[01:03:51] And there's a tense sequence in which it appears he is and then it turns out he isn't

[01:03:55] And she's like oh run away moving forward the scrunt's motivation is never established, right?

[01:04:00] Not not so much. They're just they're just bad

[01:04:02] And they're also like weird monkey creatures that supposedly can help her out, but they're they can't show up till later

[01:04:08] I don't know why the weird monkey creatures are even involved look cool

[01:04:11] This these creatures were designed by crash my career who also did all the um

[01:04:17] Monster pirates in the second part of the caribbean movie

[01:04:20] The like the fishy moth like bill nine davie jones and everyone he's good at designing

[01:04:25] Davy jones very cool character design. Yeah, like octopus man. Yeah, and still in scargurt scarves guard is like a lobster

[01:04:31] I believe you're talking about bootstrap bill. Yeah. Yeah, I have a good skill at remembering names of things

[01:04:36] I don't like okay, um, so I rewatching the introduction for the fourth time after watching the whole movie

[01:04:43] This was the one idea I was able to get across clearly was they say that like in the past

[01:04:48] There was a very clear channel between the blue world and the green world

[01:04:52] I guess, you know, or whatever our fucking world is called the brown world our world of duty

[01:04:56] And the blue world when they were able to communicate with us the stream of conversation led to a better society

[01:05:04] Oh, I see and that's been cut off

[01:05:06] Rorps us with the land we started building things right. That's right. So there's sort of very vague environmental message

[01:05:13] Well, it used to be like it was just a constant back and forth and now that it's become so disjointed

[01:05:18] A guy needs to write a book that can change everything in one family

[01:05:20] Apparently a midwestern orator will read this book. It will be on the bookshelf of a boy

[01:05:25] And they'll tell him they'll be like hey, this book's pretty good

[01:05:27] They say a book he keeps on hearing about right and he's going to not to spoil anything

[01:05:33] But he's gonna read that book

[01:05:34] But then also someone's gonna assassinate m night shaman

[01:05:38] Over this because story can see the future

[01:05:41] Sure sort of somehow

[01:05:43] He can't see herself being carried away by the eagle or how that happens

[01:05:46] Yeah, and she can't unders explain why these monkeys who are her protectors are apparently just not doing that right

[01:05:52] Uh, but m night says like he keeps on saying like this book just like all the thoughts I have leaders and stuff

[01:05:58] And then later in the film. Oh, yeah, I wrote that line down

[01:06:00] Oh, please. Please read dramatic reading. Hold on. No, I mean, I don't think I wrote the whole thing down, but um

[01:06:05] Uh

[01:06:07] Oh, fuck I can't find oh, oh, yeah just my thoughts on all the cultural problems thoughts on leaders and stuff

[01:06:13] Yeah, I believe that is the whole all the cultural problems all the cultural problems and this is 20 20 06

[01:06:18] So a lot of cultural problems. Yeah, you know, we're in the midst of the sort of w bush culture wars

[01:06:23] And right before that I wrote he can't cook

[01:06:25] Question mark question mark exclamation point because the way the cleveland figures out that it's not a cookbook

[01:06:31] Is he mentions like oh, I can't you know, I can't I can't make anything

[01:06:34] And he's like and then like Paul G. Muddy slowly turns around and it's like, uh, it's not a cookbook

[01:06:39] Right, that's right. I forgot about that

[01:06:41] I mean, it's a twist like you say this film is loaded with twists that happens 85 seconds after the idea was set up

[01:06:47] So she tries to leave having met she meets m night pretty quickly. Yeah, like they introduce her

[01:06:53] Can I just put out one thing before no because I think what just say m night

[01:06:56] So m night has this later line where he says to her he's like, you know, I gotta say like you mentioned things happening in the future

[01:07:02] And then I you know, oh you said the boy the that's what he goes this fucking boy who had changed the world

[01:07:07] Why wouldn't he come out and try to meet me if he read the book?

[01:07:10] I'm not alive when the kid reads the book, huh?

[01:07:13] And she's like silent and he's like, you know, I say a lot of stuff in this book things

[01:07:19] I don't know how people are gonna react a lot of stuff about juice

[01:07:22] He never even begins to explain what he says in the book just that it's a lot of ideas

[01:07:26] And that people are gonna react strongly to it. There is no clear point that he's not just an anti-semite

[01:07:31] Like the book could just be killed on the shoot

[01:07:33] Which he explains where he falls

[01:07:36] It's men's rights

[01:07:39] 100% listen to me now. This book is read by the return of kings guy

[01:07:44] 10 years later flies out of the sky and drops a fedora on his head

[01:07:47] He predicts in the book in 2006. This book is I hope they serve beer and hell and he is playing talkerman

[01:07:52] Yeah, he predicts in the book that 10 years hence

[01:07:55] Ghostbusters will be remade with an all-fee

[01:07:59] That's the inciting incident

[01:08:02] That's like the treaty of Versailles. You're like, yeah, okay

[01:08:05] Um, so then she tries to leave she gets attacked by the scrunch only attack her legs

[01:08:11] Uh, yeah rips her legs

[01:08:12] You know, she's her she seems to be weakening throughout and it's unclear

[01:08:16] I thought they just had to throw her in the pool and she would be revived. No

[01:08:20] It doesn't happen and she's going from like a brace Dallas Howard color palette to like a mia vasca house

[01:08:25] She starts getting like drained by the end. She's tilled a swinton in Arnea. Yes

[01:08:31] Now so she explains. Oh

[01:08:33] Problem with the scrunch easy. We just need a symbologist a guardian a guild and a healer

[01:08:39] Wait, can we talk for a second about this when he goes swimming in the pool?

[01:08:42] Sure. Yeah. Yeah. What does he have to do? He has to go

[01:08:46] I forgot about this. He has to get her sand. He has to get her like a magic

[01:08:50] She has a healing clay. So he swims into the pool and I wrote down

[01:08:54] Shelly winters and Poseidon adventure. Yeah, absolutely

[01:08:56] He goes a long way holds his breath hold his breath for like a champion diver like a pearl diver level

[01:09:01] And he figures that he's a super of a building who who was a what was he what was his profession before his family tragedy?

[01:09:07] He was a doctor a doctor

[01:09:08] So he figures out this crazy breathing technique underwater where he like finds an air pocket and it's kind of macabre

[01:09:14] Right, so we I'm sorry. We have to talk about this. Yeah

[01:09:16] Cleveland heap used to be a doctor one night when he was working

[01:09:19] Dr. Heap someone broke into his house and murdered his wife and children

[01:09:23] Much like

[01:09:24] Unbreakable crime and unbreakable. Yeah. Yeah

[01:09:27] And like every other night shawarma film because you think he's avoiding up until the point of this reveal

[01:09:31] Is about a man who spends too much time in his career and lets his relationship to his wife and or children fall away in some sort of

[01:09:37] A fashion. Yeah, and this is so bad

[01:09:39] This is the one film where he lost his family entirely and it was his fault

[01:09:43] Right, right. He thinks he thinks if he had been there if he hadn't been working himself

[01:09:47] Right, right and after that he developed a stutter and decided to run a building

[01:09:51] Yeah

[01:09:51] Like anyone would because you know the characteristics of a doctor

[01:09:54] Definitely like not a stressful job is being the only super at like a 16 story apartment building and a fucking job

[01:10:01] We have to communicate with people

[01:10:03] Are fucking impossible for you to get out of your mouth like a 350 unit building like it's absolutely

[01:10:10] Of crazy people and full of trees

[01:10:13] And tova fell just and the swimming pool is a portal to another world

[01:10:18] So right that too. Yeah that they mentioned that in the corkern listing. Okay, so

[01:10:23] So she blue world adjacent

[01:10:25] He gets the clay. He unscrews the drain at the bottom of the pool. He dives underneath. He finds clay on a shelf

[01:10:30] Yeah, he rubs down her legs and let's not forget also that they consult grandma to figure out how to heal her too

[01:10:37] You know, she provides all that information. Yeah, that's crazy scene where he's on the phone with the granddaughter

[01:10:42] While she's at the club. Oh, yeah, and she's like hold on. Let me call my grandmother and then she like relates the story

[01:10:47] It's very bizarre. I don't know why he chose to write this thing. We're like

[01:10:51] Yeah, it's all like it all has to be translation. Yeah, it's very strange

[01:10:54] It's like the scene in The Last of the Mohicans where Daniel Day-Lewis has to have the British guy speak french to the native americans

[01:11:00] Who only speak french?

[01:11:02] Anyway, yeah, I recently watched last night. I'd like to say though the choice of having them always yell at each other really

[01:11:08] Yeah, really cement the sort of like a dimensionality and like, you know

[01:11:13] Like a thought that went into like portraying these people like, you know as like not

[01:11:18] Stereotypes at all right no

[01:11:21] Gryff's rewrite station. Here's a quick fix I would do on this movie. Okay, rather than have it be it'd be funny

[01:11:27] If your quick fix was all white people

[01:11:30] This is the one movie where

[01:11:33] Puccino plays everyone. Um quick rewrite corner, uh rather than have it be a a old

[01:11:39] Bedtime story that apparently is only passed along one family line

[01:11:43] Why not have it be like a fucking hands Christian Andersen like some sort of tale that we all sort of know

[01:11:48] And everyone's trying to remember together. I guess so but and rather than use all these different terms that make it confusing to follow

[01:11:54] Why not just go like in the story? There's always one who protects

[01:11:57] One who understands rather than going like the symbologist

[01:12:00] Narf scrunt, tartuic, symbologist, guardian, guild, healer. What is so hard about this blue world? The guild?

[01:12:04] The guild?

[01:12:06] Well, I think if I have to learn

[01:12:08] Like he was just like oh jk rallying did it. I can do it people will learn this right and we should

[01:12:12] He wanted to direct a harry potter movie. He always talked about it. He always said he wanted to do it

[01:12:17] Way obviously he was jollosman. Yeah, he was kept away from it and uh that would have been that would have been something

[01:12:25] Well, he got to his kids franchise later

[01:12:28] Two two entries to go guys wait wait for that one. He tried to do two kids franchises back to back

[01:12:35] Uh sure. Yeah, um, but anyway, okay

[01:12:38] So they set up all these different roles that there needs to be all these different people

[01:12:42] Bryce house Howard tells him that they exist but cannot explain who they are. Yes, she's been ordered for the

[01:12:48] For the fucking eagle to come is that what it is?

[01:12:50] It's let me see that it's really unclear why they're doing this process of like finding the pool in the first place

[01:12:56] I thought it was like through the cave right so can't you go back through the cave to the door close?

[01:13:00] No, you have to fly back to the water. You can't swim because water's in the sky. That makes perfect sense

[01:13:05] So anyway, the giant eagle carries you back to the water

[01:13:08] What is that clear about the crux of the movie is he goes to bob balliband and says like you know all about movies and stories

[01:13:14] So who do you think like the symbologist would be for example movies are predictable. I've never seen anything. I think it's a prize

[01:13:19] Yeah, I hate all film. I just saw rom-com. It sucked. They kissed in the rain

[01:13:24] Who likes these movies? You know, he has like a lot of a lot of axes. I guess you could say it's about a

[01:13:28] Spiritual rebirth. G. Motti says like what if it's like the rain is is a metaphor to represent their cleansing

[01:13:33] And he goes like no absolutely not like he's a film critic who doesn't believe in reading into films

[01:13:38] Which means he is not any film critic in history right

[01:13:42] Other than lulimenec, he's lulimenec. He's

[01:13:45] No action jackson

[01:13:48] Lights camera action jackson likes camera jackson. Thanks camera jackson. What is his actual his name is jackson?

[01:13:52] Right? That's his first name his first name is action, but it's called ax q r t

[01:13:57] The toast of all but he

[01:14:00] So ballamance says it's probably someone who likes puzzles by the way, that's perfectly good advice

[01:14:05] It's not like some film critic asshole thing to say. It's like who do you think the symbologist might be right?

[01:14:10] He's supposed to like Robert Langdon. Well, I you know, you should watch out for a kid who looks at cereal boxes

[01:14:15] Oh, so the way he poses the question is like he doesn't go like hey

[01:14:18] You watch a lot of movies you understand how stories work if there was someone who needed to solve something

[01:14:22] Who do you think? How do you think you could figure out and he says like

[01:14:24] The character would usually be set up at the beginning of the film with innocuous dialogues

[01:14:27] So they plant your brain which is like what he does in the first 15 minutes

[01:14:30] But he goes like if there needed to be a symbologist

[01:14:33] Who do you think it would be like he presents them to ballaban with the proper titles that were given to him?

[01:14:37] He goes, oh a symbologist is in the scrunch story probably jeffrey right down the hall

[01:14:42] He's a big enough actor that you wouldn't hire him to only do that one scene at the beginning

[01:14:45] He a skeptical film critic accepts the premises of the movie as immediately as anyone else

[01:14:49] No fucking sense because he's everything. He hates

[01:14:52] I think ballamance pretty good

[01:14:55] There's yeah, he's always good. He's very good at just percing his lips, you know like and not talking like he's yeah

[01:15:01] He communicates a lot

[01:15:02] There's an irony also to bob ballaban playing a film critic

[01:15:05] Which is the filmmaker trying to get back at film critics when bob ballaman is like the ultimate film critic's actor

[01:15:10] Like he's the kind of actor that all critics are like god. I always love ballaban if anything

[01:15:14] He's always like an audience sir. I get four film critics because it's like that guy looks smart

[01:15:18] And he's observing his surroundings

[01:15:20] so

[01:15:21] Like that's a ballaban type right like so they they assemble this these people so the potheds are the guild

[01:15:27] Yeah, they got a lot of writes the symbologist the butterfly lady played by mary not k. Mary Bethard

[01:15:34] Is the healer correct and the the guardian she thinks is geomati cleave one right dr. Heap

[01:15:42] Uh, this doesn't work out

[01:15:44] Absolutely not

[01:15:46] It's in fact what doesn't work out. But what doesn't that's what him to the evil charges

[01:15:50] The scrunch charges the eagle doesn't come that's the that's the problem

[01:15:53] That's the problem and then they all kind of gather and they try to do like a practice

[01:15:57] Well, there's a bizarre scene where there's a they throw up part by the way

[01:16:00] She's mostly in the shower for the whole movie

[01:16:02] Which is sitting in the shower giving sort of blinking instructions

[01:16:05] I wanted to say like if you came into that out of context that scene

[01:16:08] Where it's just a group of people standing around a woman crouched in the shower

[01:16:13] It doesn't look good. It's so fucking crazy. It's not looking good. It's the dynamic between geomati and it is the preview image on amazon

[01:16:18] Oh, when you start the video the preview image is her in a shower looking like she's about to be attacked

[01:16:23] It's it's horrifying the dynamic between geomati and howard is always creepy

[01:16:27] There's never any like I suppose it's supposed to be kind of paternal but it doesn't work also sexual it is

[01:16:32] And naked the whole fucking she's naked. She's a grown-up like it doesn't work at all whatever he's going for

[01:16:37] We're talking about

[01:16:39] This is hollywood royalty

[01:16:42] So it doesn't work and they all figure out that they actually should be something else

[01:16:45] But yes, there's a big party so he throw there's they throw a party at the ostensibly to welcome the new film critic to the

[01:16:52] Apartment right? Yes, right and he's overjoyed by the way in the party scene

[01:16:56] You get the impression that m night shaman on has never been to a party

[01:17:00] I have no idea what that is. He's always missing on the list for his own premiere parties. Yeah

[01:17:06] We got a manaj shaman on but no m night because that's not a real name

[01:17:10] Uh, but no let's let's let's let's what's in this party. What do we got?

[01:17:13] There's balloons. There's some balloons. There's there's a dj set indoors silver tides playing everyone's favorite band silver tides

[01:17:19] Let's check in with strong arm guy. Yeah, he's lifting on one side

[01:17:24] Which is this is the second time we've seen him in 45 minutes

[01:17:26] He has the opening line of the film and then he comes back at the 45 minute part

[01:17:30] To lift a drink to his mouth

[01:17:32] We all live in your city

[01:17:32] We live in apartment buildings when you move into an apartment building they have a party for you always

[01:17:36] I mean, that's just the end like, you know, everyone comes

[01:17:39] It's a joyously warm environment the super of all people organizes the party

[01:17:45] Is always like a really personable guy who knows everyone and gets along with everyone

[01:17:49] Full of west-dom furniture

[01:17:51] By the swimming pool and let's not give the super all the credit for throwing the party because of course he has to

[01:17:55] Enlist a guild and the guild's gonna be a bunch of judgmental people who scoff at everyone else who walks around them

[01:17:59] Cigarettes and like rock music, right? They love throwing parties for their neighbors. Yeah, uh, so

[01:18:05] There's a party. Yeah, I sensibly just sort of smuggle her out

[01:18:09] Away from the scrunt doesn't see her. Does she get some cool silver tide tracks on the soundtrack?

[01:18:13] The scrunt sneaks into the apartment building and savages and murders bob ballaband

[01:18:18] But not before bob ballaband has weirdly torn down the movie by like sort like this is the moment where it gets very meta

[01:18:25] He has a monologue where he's like, oh, I see you're trying to scare me with this scary scene

[01:18:29] Well, uh, you're pointing at me griffin because this is my favorite detail in the entire film

[01:18:33] He goes but in a film where there has been no cursing or explicit content

[01:18:37] Up and for this point a family film they will not actually let someone be murdered on camera

[01:18:41] So I'll come that will come close to his death, but manage to close the door just the right second

[01:18:46] Yeah, I mean this is the kind of stuff the kids love

[01:18:49] And I'm pointing out that you're watching a kid's movie. Bob. This is where I've been giving a Kevin Williamson style monologue

[01:18:56] It's an outtake from scream

[01:18:58] And I want to say he's saying like yeah, huh?

[01:19:00] This is like a this is like a pg-13 movie

[01:19:02] Do you know why because someone is ripped to pieces by a wolf

[01:19:06] Like even though it's off-screen

[01:19:09] That's fucking offensive. Can I say something?

[01:19:14] I'm upset you think all fucking scrunch or wolves and vice versa. He's very clear. They're not wolves

[01:19:20] He explains it to the fucking epa guy and he goes like sounds like no wolf I've ever seen

[01:19:24] I forgot about that guy. He's got grass fur. David. I didn't like the revenant because in real life

[01:19:28] Hugh glass was attacked by a scrunt. I know it's true. That is true. And I just feel like that was a weird detail

[01:19:33] A snow scrunt by a scrunt

[01:19:35] But Hugh glass did not have a mirror

[01:19:37] Which you need to see the scrunts. Yeah, is that right?

[01:19:40] You can only look at them through a mirror unless they're the guardian and then you can look them in the eyes and make them back off

[01:19:46] There is that great scene the revenant where Hugh glass goes

[01:19:49] I'm a good character in a film with an R rating who's been kind to a son so far

[01:19:53] Which means so much you could do

[01:19:56] It just pat me on the back. You couldn't fully beast me and then tova felchers shoots an arrow at him

[01:20:05] And that's that's it. Thank you guys

[01:20:11] Welcome back to lady in the band chat

[01:20:16] That's a terrible movie by the way, I haven't seen it. Oh, it's so bad

[01:20:19] I won't seem these movies after I saw my old lady lady in the van is almost as hard to follow

[01:20:26] You won't watch any film with lady in the title and Maggie Smith in the title role correct

[01:20:31] You won't no did you did anyone else see my old lady? No, it was terrible the Kevin Klein one

[01:20:35] I advise you to not watch it because I value your sanity, but if you ever do watch it

[01:20:40] Um, yeah being prepared for the most poisonously mean toxic horrible drama when you were expecting a hilarious like comedy about

[01:20:49] An old lady who lives in an apartment. I don't know. I can't I would need an hour to tell you what happened to my old lady

[01:20:55] It's been off

[01:20:56] It was like being punched repeatedly in the stomach episode just david alone

[01:21:02] Just just monologuing on my old lady

[01:21:04] So he assigns all the people in the roles and then it doesn't work and he realizes that they're all wrong and it's suddenly other people

[01:21:11] Uh, yeah, and then it turns out it's like oh the guild isn't the stoners. It's these five mexican sisters

[01:21:17] We're porting all the time and a couple other people right?

[01:21:21] It doesn't they don't have to be sisters with each other

[01:21:23] There's seven people who are sisters serita shawty. She can't she's a sister and that's by the way when I found out that she was

[01:21:29] M night sister in the movie

[01:21:31] That's lunacy that was clear for me. It's not lunacy and uh, and oh by the way, that's all discerned from cereal boxes

[01:21:37] Oh, yeah

[01:21:39] So basically there are initials not the initial ideas about who was who are all wrong

[01:21:44] And there's a there's a there's a line or two in there where one of the characters like

[01:21:49] Gets angry at the critics because he got his his textual read was wrong

[01:21:54] Yeah, and they everyone in the room is like I can't someone's like he dared to presume

[01:21:58] He knew the mind of someone else and it's like oh, so this is M night shaman being like don't tell me what my motivations were for making the village

[01:22:04] You fucker or whatever

[01:22:07] Like they just said like oh

[01:22:08] Yeah, it's because that film critic has been shopping up babies in his apartment for years

[01:22:12] Like that's the level of their revulsion when they hear that he guessed maybe jeffrey right was the uh

[01:22:17] Symbol it also feels a little like if you guys would stop guessing why I'm making the movies the way I'm making them

[01:22:21] Then maybe I'd settle that and make a movie you wanted to see well, right exactly nope

[01:22:26] Wrong again

[01:22:28] So he realizes everything's wrong. There's the little boy turns out the kids the symbologist not

[01:22:31] Jeffrey right because early in the film when the father was doing the puzzle and we were

[01:22:35] Distracted to look at the charisma of jeffrey right. He's looking at a cereal box and going

[01:22:39] I don't understand why this mascot looks sad

[01:22:41] Which is how I behaved as a child and instead people went oh this kid has depression issues

[01:22:46] He's not a symbologist in the movie. You'd be the symbologist

[01:22:49] Yeah, yes, and then my uh depression would go unchecked for years and they just put a lot of pressure on me

[01:22:54] Now the guardian turns out to be who the guy with the big arm. Of course ready to work you guys

[01:22:59] Of course because he's got one big arm. What else would be yeah? I and and the healer is paul geomati

[01:23:03] Yes, because you know he's got to oh, yeah, so she's got to get to his own healing as well scratched up by the scrunch

[01:23:10] Guys this is all in the film, but you're in my favorite detail

[01:23:13] These are these details from the film mama and grandma say

[01:23:18] She said that sometimes not all the time, but in certain tellings of the story. There are two bonus characters

[01:23:25] Sometimes right, but not all times two bonus characters one is a man

[01:23:31] Who will have great judgment?

[01:23:34] And and one is a man with no secrets, but that's not canon so I don't accept it

[01:23:38] It's not canon. Yeah, right. It's eu right. It's it's lady in the water legends

[01:23:43] Right, yeah

[01:23:45] By the way, disney's about to buy the lady in the water franchise for two billion dollars. No, they aren't as we'll talk about

[01:23:50] nerf

[01:23:54] Nerf origins a lady in the water story. All right, go on

[01:23:59] So I don't even remember what you're talking about. Yeah two bonus characters a man of great judgment

[01:24:02] Who is it bill urwin because bill urwin saw that paul geomati was grieving and called him out on it

[01:24:08] And was like it's a tough world. We live and we got to keep our head up

[01:24:10] So he calls in a man. He says I respect you greatly and bill urwin stoically nods, right?

[01:24:15] I think a man with no secrets who has no secrets

[01:24:17] Tova felchers husband because he's constantly shitting and having his secrets told

[01:24:21] He has another people on the other side of the door

[01:24:24] Listening to him that is the most well insulated bathroom door in the world by the way

[01:24:28] It's a one-way door is loudly screaming all of his secrets right outside of it

[01:24:33] No, but he also yells stuff back at her. He does. He does. So it's a one-way door other people are in the apartment

[01:24:37] It's a one-way door right so they bring the two of them in and their job is just to stand there and go come on

[01:24:42] You could do right and then they do it. So she's all banged up and then paul geomati hugs her

[01:24:46] And starts saying like i'm sorry. I don't want you to die, but he's really talking to his wife and children

[01:24:52] Now this is something I want to say that in previous nigh chumlin films would have worked

[01:24:56] Even if it would have been cheesy, that's how all his other movies work

[01:25:00] And he sells it like mel Gibson's character has got to get over this thing and you get it at the end

[01:25:05] Like oh, that's what everything was geared towards

[01:25:08] Not in this movie. It's barely because we only find out the shit about his family like an hour through

[01:25:13] Into the movie and it's only through brice doll's howard like sort of chatting to him about it drop it really fast

[01:25:18] They don't

[01:25:19] There's so much going on this one that you can't remember a detail like that because this film is exposition on exposition on exposition

[01:25:25] It's like everyone's telling their own personal stories and their legendary stories and it's also I think it's a legendary picture

[01:25:31] We should mention this film was produced by legendary pick correct, right

[01:25:35] I think it's it's filmed in a way that's entirely illegible like that

[01:25:40] That party scene aside from the fact that emily chumlin's everybody will party is

[01:25:45] Like bogglingly filmed. It's like what you don't know what you're looking at things start happening and no

[01:25:50] Does someone get murdered at some point? I don't know she gets dragged off by a scrunt at some point

[01:25:54] But you don't see that happen

[01:25:55] You just see her kind of get dragged away

[01:25:59] Like you don't but in his defense

[01:26:00] The reason so hard to follow is because christopher doral was having sex with a black woman and being arrested while they were

[01:26:05] That's right

[01:26:06] That's right. You can't make a movie. Yeah any movie. Yes, you're per movie

[01:26:11] I meet these young filmmakers and I go if you slept with a black woman

[01:26:13] Have you gotten arrested anyway? If so you don't have a story to tell if not

[01:26:18] Okay, uh, but we should talk about how there's the party. There's all the people

[01:26:22] They all figure out their roles

[01:26:23] They hug her and then the eagle comes in the movies over like bam

[01:26:27] That's exactly right. It's like like and it's like and the eagle comes and we see the what are they called?

[01:26:32] Yeah, for like two seconds one second. Yes, they look cool. I guess so

[01:26:36] Um, I like the creature sign that's what they look like the ants from Lord of the Rings. They look like little ants

[01:26:42] I don't think the creature design is all this ground to the author, right? I think the scrunt looks terrible

[01:26:46] I love the scrunt

[01:26:47] That's the scrunt looks like a like a creature from a buffy episode. Yeah

[01:26:51] It's a crappy CGI wolf with grass fur

[01:26:53] I did watch it on a phone, but I think the scrunt looks good and I in fact think that he

[01:26:59] Addresses makes good on some of the sins

[01:27:02] Of the alien and signs in this film. I think the scrunt he shoots better designs better

[01:27:07] Does the reflection thing better? I like the degree

[01:27:10] I'm gonna start making a line of scrunt shirts

[01:27:13] Scrant but cut your look out for that in our store. Yeah coming soon

[01:27:17] A lot of merchandise coming soon. We're developing a whole line

[01:27:20] So that's the end of the movie

[01:27:22] Yeah, so here's a theory I'd like to present people like to rag on amnite for doing twists all the time

[01:27:28] I think if he doesn't have a twist at the end of his movie, he doesn't understand how to end a movie

[01:27:32] Sure because signs does the same thing where it just ends

[01:27:36] At least signs has the jump forward like it's very badly done

[01:27:40] But it has that time jump but the jump forward lasts all of 15

[01:27:43] It's the same thing where someone holds onto a body

[01:27:46] Heals them through the power of prayer and then the movie gives you one image and it's done

[01:27:51] It's written, directed and produced the final images rather pretty

[01:27:54] The shot of geometry through the water. Oh, yeah, there's some pretty shots in this movie

[01:27:59] And I think I will say in the movie's defense

[01:28:02] The scenes despite all the clunky like what the fuck is a

[01:28:06] Symbolologist all the terms are horrible, but the scenes where they're like a bunch of grown-ups

[01:28:12] Basically doing what kids do which is sort of like play act and and make signing each other

[01:28:17] And like organize in that way

[01:28:19] I think that's thrilling and I think it like that a movie that was actually about that and done well would be like really cool to watch

[01:28:24] Simplified if that's the thing he was trying to say and he

[01:28:26] There's a couple scenes like that that work adult make believe it's it's cool guys like Jeffrey right or good at that

[01:28:31] Like they're good at kind of spouting like stuff about like source code like and you're just like, okay

[01:28:36] Sure, you know I buy it we've talked a lot about

[01:28:39] Shyamalan whether or not the scenes work on a dramatic level his sort of mise en scene is really good where he has these great environments

[01:28:45] He puts great actors in them. I would say it's usually I don't think it's as good in this movie though

[01:28:49] Like I didn't have as good a sense of the

[01:28:51] But even in this film there are these moments where he just has a fucking runner

[01:28:56] He doesn't care if you're seeing the back of one actor's head

[01:28:58] And you get to watch eight good actors in a room play off each other without cuts and there's like an energy there

[01:29:03] Whether or not that energy is being applied to something that we appreciate

[01:29:06] It's like guy is a confident director in a way that is assuring to watch. Yeah, it's just like

[01:29:14] I'm sure the experience of making the movie was as much different than watching it

[01:29:18] Like I don't know what they probably shot out of sequence

[01:29:20] Like it probably made sense to them in the way that those games make sense to kids

[01:29:24] You know, I'm sure it was like yeah, we're gonna do this and then it just but it just so there's there's like art there

[01:29:28] There's intense and effort but like oh the final product is I think it's a really really bad

[01:29:34] I agree and it's in service of a story that is not like all right griffin you're smiling

[01:29:39] I like this movie a lot. Oh my it's not

[01:29:42] Yeah, what do you actually like besides what you just said which I cannot I cannot argue that this movie is good

[01:29:47] I will not attempt to uh-huh and I admit that I have a near sexual fetish

[01:29:51] For super ambitious misguided failure. I don't think this film is that ambitious

[01:29:56] I think oh, I think what he's trying to do in this film is insane

[01:29:59] Really? I just think trying to build a whole mythology. I mean he is but I mean very half-heartedly and like it's a very simple mythology

[01:30:05] Well, and he's also put in the mythology in a film that otherwise doesn't feel like a mythology movie

[01:30:09] I guess so

[01:30:10] I also think like I mean these are my two big reads on this movie

[01:30:13] Okay, one is all in my trauma on films are crisis of faith movies, right?

[01:30:17] We realize that at this point right which is fascinating and I think it's testing that all in my trauma on films are about

[01:30:22] um

[01:30:23] Family home life relationships being fucked up, you know men who are weighed down by too many things and and don't appreciate their wife enough

[01:30:31] And crisis of faith movies

[01:30:33] That are almost always catholic if not heavily christian in bed, right and night shaman is hindu

[01:30:38] Yeah, but he went to a catholic school

[01:30:40] So he absorbed all that as a married to the same woman since he was 20 years old

[01:30:44] Sure

[01:30:44] So unless their marriage is very contentious it feels like he's picked this as his story themes without them being the things

[01:30:49] He relates to because he seems to be pretty centered

[01:30:51] You're you're balla banding right now. You're you're ascribing a lot of motivation

[01:30:56] Well, I find this fascinating. Yeah, sure

[01:30:58] I don't know but I find it fascinating that it doesn't feel like I don't think this is a very catholic movie

[01:31:03] I agree with you. Yeah, I agree with you. Now. This is the one where spirituality becomes a lot more abstract

[01:31:08] He gets a pieta in there though. I mean at the end he does it's true

[01:31:12] No, but the thing that the geometry this is the thing I think is really ambitious about this movie

[01:31:16] I'm not saying it works. I would argue that most of this movie doesn't work

[01:31:19] I think there are like two things in the film that work

[01:31:21] I don't think anything works

[01:31:22] But somehow the ambitious of it and and the fucking lunacy of it. I mean, I like a movie that's this crazy

[01:31:28] That fundamentally should not work

[01:31:30] I'm not surprised when it doesn't work because I'm like, yeah, he's swung for the fences. He swung away, you know

[01:31:36] Um

[01:31:37] I go on go on spirituality

[01:31:39] I think he's into in this film is he felt so wounded by everyone starting to hate his movies

[01:31:44] That he made a movie to try to rather than make a film about the character

[01:31:48] Reclaiming his own sense of faith get the audience to believe in him again as a storyteller

[01:31:53] I'm not saying this is a sympathetic mission

[01:31:55] But it's a crazy idea for a fucking movie

[01:31:58] Is he made a movie that's like everyone calm down act like a child and just love a story

[01:32:02] Just sit down drink a glass of milk, but it's love a story with me at the center, which is weird

[01:32:07] Which is lunacy. I don't think it's lunatic. I think it's stupid. I'm not commending him for this

[01:32:11] I'm saying I find it fascinating commending him. I'm saying I enjoy watching

[01:32:15] I'm not attributing any positive or negative qualities to this movie one star

[01:32:18] I give this movie 27 star

[01:32:20] So what I'm curious

[01:32:21] Because your great project here is not just about leading the war it's about his uvra

[01:32:26] Figuring out him. Yes, you guys have said in previous episodes

[01:32:29] I am a dedicated listener

[01:32:30] Thank you that this

[01:32:31] That the village marks something of a turning point because it's when the kind of

[01:32:35] The bloom fell off the rose really for him, right? Like people didn't like that

[01:32:38] The first real serious backlash he's faced right this movie lady in the water is what

[01:32:43] Solidified his downfall. Is that what dynamited his career into smithereens?

[01:32:47] This is when his movies start feeling scared

[01:32:49] Not only stop being scary and they start feeling like a films films of a man who's trying to hold on to what he

[01:32:54] Has let's also this is not only the film that dynamites his career in terms of like it is a bad movie that everyone hates

[01:33:00] It's a film that ruins his industry

[01:33:02] Reputation because of his like well publicized freak out at disney for not buying the movie

[01:33:07] Okay, and then it didn't do the man who heard voices and like it is where m night shaman

[01:33:11] Who is top-illed in this movie on the poster as he had always been

[01:33:15] Is like really like torn down at every sort of angle right and it's the movie where he is murdering himself

[01:33:21] In the movie. Yeah, it is like the perfect conflict ratio. I can't think of a more spectacular like director blow up, right?

[01:33:28] I want to read a like

[01:33:31] I want to read a nonfiction novel about the making of this movie and there is one there is one

[01:33:35] Yes

[01:33:37] This is for our listeners. This is the brief backstory on this one. I have never read but it's about leading the water

[01:33:41] Yes, yes, I mean it's about m night, but I sort of centered on lady in the water

[01:33:45] It's some journals

[01:33:48] Night m

[01:33:49] Dr. Heap the movie before this he commissioned the buried secret van night shaman

[01:33:53] Which is a mockumentary about you were trying to investigate him that was my first acting job

[01:33:56] That was almost entirely cut out of what we will watch at some later date. I have bought it on dvd

[01:34:00] I have never seen it in my life, but I did cash that check for $150 which I was told at the time was sag minimum great

[01:34:07] Not 65,000 you didn't get 65. I was told no going going

[01:34:11] But he at this time was trying to mythologize himself

[01:34:14] You know in this real way and so rather make an artificial thing

[01:34:17] He hired someone and said i'm starting a new film. I have my script

[01:34:20] I'm going to hire you to follow me around and write the entire process of how an amaranth film

[01:34:24] Illustrated writer michael bamberger. That's the office. Do you think he was so distracted by that?

[01:34:28] But that's how he lost

[01:34:30] Is it like I don't know anyway go out. I think from the moment he handed in the script

[01:34:33] He had this writer on hand, right? Right and he thought the book was just going to be here's a look into the process

[01:34:38] Of america's most successful and beloved filmmaker, right? Right now this will save humanity from itself someday

[01:34:44] Yeah, exactly. Are you going to read about what happened with this? Yeah, there's a really good succinct quote here on the

[01:34:50] amazon x-ray

[01:34:53] But he uh

[01:34:55] Okay, according to the book the man who heard voices or how em night shamalan risked his career on a fairy tale

[01:35:01] One of the reasons why shamalan decided to part with disney was because disney's president development

[01:35:05] Nina jake obscene

[01:35:06] Yes took her son to a party instead of staying home to read the script for lady in the water

[01:35:10] Shamalan had it personally couriered to her and to add insult to injury. She didn't like it anyway

[01:35:15] Shamalan went off in a huff and the creative differences he purportedly had with disney

[01:35:20] Was that he simply felt there was nothing creative about disney anymore because he at the time said i'm leaving them for creative differences

[01:35:26] And they're saying it was just him

[01:35:28] Shit talking disney

[01:35:29] He took the script to warner brothers instead

[01:35:30] But without the usual marketing campaign that disney promoted his other films with lady in the water was a box office flop

[01:35:35] Uh, I don't that's uh some of that's bullshit because warner brothers marketed the shit out of this movie

[01:35:40] Yeah

[01:35:41] It did 18 million opening weekend which is not terrible for a film that had horrible reviews and two actors who are not

[01:35:46] Box office draws and was a director working outside of his genre

[01:35:50] Yep, right and the insult was taking her son to a birthday party

[01:35:53] That she didn't I guess not liking the script and allowing him right here. How dare she now not like it what I had always heard

[01:36:00] The legend I have heard is that she just said okay. I'm night. I think it's interesting idea here in my notes

[01:36:04] Yeah, she spoke to him about the storyline and he said fuck you on am I shamalan? I don't get notes

[01:36:09] I'm paraphrasing according to wikipedia also dick took dick hook who is nina jakemson's boss

[01:36:14] Literally said to her like I do not understand what this movie is

[01:36:17] I get em night

[01:36:18] I get him and I want to make his movie

[01:36:20] But I don't know you I don't know what this is now what I've heard is that they were also supportive and said like we

[01:36:25] Want to make an em right show they still said they would they would make the movie. They still said they'd make it and he took it away

[01:36:30] Yeah

[01:36:31] No, and so now he said to this guy who's writing the book like great

[01:36:34] You get to write a book about me reinventing myself right and the book ended up sort of I mean it's a job

[01:36:39] Yeah, yeah, and he hated it and who released this movie

[01:36:42] Warner Brothers so he tova felchistyle kicked himself in the behind and soared over to to warn her brother. Yes. Yeah

[01:36:49] He loraxed him over legendary pictures who at this point had made like Batman begins was like becoming Warner Brothers

[01:36:54] Financiers for all their biggest ten-pole movies, right? And it makes 18 million opening weekend a competitive weekend

[01:37:00] Yeah, do you want to tell me some of the can you guess it up recently?

[01:37:02] I know my super x-girlfriend was number three that weekend. No is number seven

[01:37:05] Lady in the water was number three number one was still parts of the carabin 35 million. It's third weekend

[01:37:11] Number two would have been cars was 11

[01:37:15] Cars is a 10. Okay

[01:37:17] Uh, I was number two is an animated film nominated for an oscar written by dan harmon. Yes

[01:37:22] Monster house was the charming monster house. I never saw it. It's a good movie that opened to 22 and lady opened to 18 mil

[01:37:28] And made in total 40

[01:37:30] It ended up with a grand total of 42 million dollars 72 worldwide cost 70 to make 70 75

[01:37:38] So that's a horrible result. It's terrible multiplier

[01:37:42] Um, I mean it was like immediately audiences other movies in there. You mean to pre little man clerks two

[01:37:48] Little man hex girlfriend

[01:37:50] Superman returns devilers proud to click cars. Yeah

[01:37:54] Good year for film

[01:37:55] Yeah, so I think we're pretty much getting there, huh? Wouldn't you say towards the end of the episode?

[01:38:00] Well, there's I know you have your your segment that you want to set up

[01:38:04] I did want to throw something out to you guys if you're interested

[01:38:07] Uh, my thought was why did this have to play take place in a shitty apartment complex?

[01:38:11] So I wrote a list of other places that it could have been said it like this. Here we go. Good. Uh, so off the top

[01:38:17] I was thinking what about a golf course

[01:38:19] Uh, so the pool or the little lake a lake water feature and lady in the lake

[01:38:25] The lady she comes a caddy for a golf player who's having trouble with this game

[01:38:30] So it's tin cup basically

[01:38:32] Yeah, so and she's like the rene Russo or or like bagger vans. You know, imagine a bagger vans

[01:38:37] Yeah, do you guys know what the villain's name played by don johnson in tin cup is a scrum david sims? Is that true?

[01:38:45] Yeah, anyway, go on

[01:38:48] No one's really into that one. I feel like you're not selling these as much as you

[01:38:52] Are you excited when you throw these ideas out? I got a good one. Um, how about on a pirate ship?

[01:38:59] Yeah, that summer parts of the Caribbean

[01:39:03] You know like a time like made in the past it's made in the past or it's set in the past

[01:39:07] It's in the past and then this could be the root of the mermaid legend angle. Like you know, that's how you like

[01:39:12] This movie might work better. It's like a sea shanty

[01:39:16] Right as fathoms below at the beginning of the little mermaid. I mean right like you just just lean into it

[01:39:21] I mean, I get the idea of like, oh, what if you're so what a shanty from

[01:39:25] Based on an original sea shanty

[01:39:29] This movie sucks. Fuck this movie. This is what I'm gonna say

[01:39:31] I can't defend this movie as being good, right? No, but I find it fascinating to watch and I enjoy watching it

[01:39:36] It's a bit of a blank check, you know, I'm watching it more than most movies

[01:39:40] I totally disagree. I watched on a plane was like I would watch this again. Like I'm just I can I'm so

[01:39:45] Engaged by this movie and trying to figure out what the fuck is going on

[01:39:48] Not in any way that's a credit to him

[01:39:50] But in the way that like film is interesting because jd amada pasca said that all films he believes are about the director

[01:39:56] Right. Well, okay, but one of them this movie has its director in it as but

[01:40:00] That's the thing. It's so naked and it's so transparent

[01:40:03] But also so unself-aware at the same time that I I'm like

[01:40:06] Fascinated by I want to dive into the bottom and get the clay and rub it on my legs

[01:40:09] Okay, well, I mean I think as a study of ego. It's fascinating and it is a naked and vulnerable movie in those

[01:40:16] Terms right to watch it. I mean I I'm a lead. I and so I've never downloaded a movie from itunes before for this

[01:40:21] Yeah, um, and so I did I paid four dollars

[01:40:24] Yeah, you told me very excitedly that you're gonna do this and I was like, all right Richard

[01:40:28] I've never done it before I've never ordered anything from amazon either

[01:40:31] But uh, I thought that I had done something wrong and the movie was skipping scenes because I could not follow

[01:40:37] Like I was like it's the download wrong

[01:40:39] You were like the people watching the last episode of the sopranos and you're like, should I call my cable company?

[01:40:43] Which I almost did in 2008 or whatever that was seven

[01:40:48] Can I make one final point that I find interesting and I'm not trying to win you over

[01:40:51] This is the read of this film that I think makes it fascinating. Okay

[01:40:55] Popular theory. I think he confirmed it that inception was christopher no one's film about film

[01:41:01] Did you ever confirm that? I do like that idea sure

[01:41:03] Or at least that's one angle on inception

[01:41:05] And that's another movie with a lot of stupid titles of people who have specific

[01:41:07] No one's a blank check filmmaker who we should 100 but the idea is that like de caprio is the director and

[01:41:13] Just corn leverage the producer and tom harts the actor

[01:41:16] Well that's worse can what's an obvious that Marianne cote yard is m night shaman

[01:41:20] What's not we was the studio? Okay? He's fine. All right. Just going love it's a muscle who fights for his

[01:41:25] Right and ellen page is the writer ellen page the writer tom hardy's the actor bow

[01:41:30] Marianne cote yards. What though?

[01:41:31] Uh, Marianne cote. She's the art. She's the muse. She's art. She's uh, a film's fatal flaws

[01:41:38] Yeah, she's the cook

[01:41:40] Okay, uh, leave the cook. Yeah, that's not fair. Oh, I kept on looking up. Uh, how to say late in the water in french

[01:41:46] It's because it's easy. It's like let them

[01:41:51] Water is uh l apostrophe e a u right? Yes is the water anyway continues anyway

[01:41:57] Um, I think this film was shaman trying to make that film as well

[01:42:01] This argument he's making to people being like stop being so cynical just fucking enjoy your story

[01:42:05] I'm trying to tell a story for you. He's also trying to make a movie about how stories get told, right?

[01:42:09] Right, which is very very like clunkingly don dons low don low. There we go. Oh cool

[01:42:15] Um, this is a movie in which a woman whose name is story is like has to be saved and protected and carried off into the

[01:42:22] Sky very true by a whole team of people who are very very specific positions

[01:42:26] You know and roles they have to do in the collaborative process of filmmaking and how a story gets translated to the people

[01:42:32] What I find fascinating about that is there's a movie in which a guy anytime anyone told him gave him any constructive criticism

[01:42:38] He was like fuck you. I'm an eye trauma line. I know exactly what i'm doing

[01:42:41] I don't need any help from anybody, but everyone does turn out to be wrong

[01:42:45] Yes as he did as well

[01:42:47] He turned out to be wrong for thinking he could do it in his own way

[01:42:50] Do you have anything else because I think we're approaching two hours on this one? I think this movie's fascinating

[01:42:54] It is fascinating. I just don't think it's good. It is but it's a horror to watch right. I agree

[01:42:58] It's awful. I like where where you lose me is the idea that this is a watchable film

[01:43:02] I find it very unwatchable. I'm gay and I just don't see the appeal of scrant

[01:43:07] I

[01:43:08] I am I want to officially come out as a scrant. Most sexual

[01:43:11] Um, no, you know, yes as I said

[01:43:13] I have this nearsactual fetish for films that are this sort of disastrous and ambitious and this naked right

[01:43:19] And so watchability is a thing that I don't link to quality

[01:43:22] Okay, but uh as a critic you got to think about watchability. I guess maybe that's why I don't know

[01:43:27] I find boring movies watchable sometime

[01:43:30] I don't know I wouldn't recommend it to anyone else, but I'm just telling you to be honest. I'm nice style

[01:43:34] Nakedly honest. I can watch this movie like a thousand times. I dare you to watch this

[01:43:40] Never watch it again

[01:43:42] Times for the same reason like I can't figure it out. It's trying to entertain you. This movie is weirdly not trying to entertain

[01:43:48] You're so somber. There's no whimsy in a bedtime story

[01:43:52] I agree with that and this is a filmmaker who before this has always tried to entertain

[01:43:57] He's been very Spielberg. He's been entertainment first even when he's telling his stories

[01:44:01] And he completely forgets to do that in this movie because he's so

[01:44:04] Wrapped up in his own fucking drama that we don't care about his ish his ideas on cultural problems

[01:44:10] He makes in his own cookbook

[01:44:13] I'll say this channel and had made good movies up until now and he's made this anchor movie as if he'd made bad movies

[01:44:19] Yeah, he's very defensive insecure

[01:44:21] Relax, buddy. You're like a fucking success. You're like a 20 million dollar picture guy

[01:44:26] bedtime story

[01:44:27] And he's also like like 32 by the time this movie is made, right? I mean, he's

[01:44:31] Is he that young?

[01:44:32] Really fucking young. We looked it up the other day because he's

[01:44:35] He's what 21 when praying with anger is made. Yeah, that's 92. That's uh

[01:44:41] You know, he's 45 now. He was born in 1970. So he was 35

[01:44:45] Good job, M. Night

[01:44:47] yeah, um

[01:44:50] Lady in the water

[01:44:51] A filmed by M. Night Shyamalan a bedtime story. You know anything else if I'm gonna shit on I have to agree with you guys

[01:44:55] I was watching it on a plane. I was trying to fall asleep and I didn't do its job

[01:44:58] I didn't fall asleep after watching it. I didn't sleep a wink on the plane. Did you have another bit you wanted to do?

[01:45:04] No, the second segment I want to do is the trivia thing which I

[01:45:09] You were also going to talk about playstation, but I'm not gonna talk about it. I'll make me too angry

[01:45:12] Sony PlayStation someone hacked into my account when I was on an overnight flight

[01:45:17] Twitter

[01:45:18] Read it, but I know longer griffons newman's the cookbook. It's my cookbook

[01:45:22] I no longer can watch fucking hulu or play disney infinity because someone hacked into my account and sony has blamed me for that

[01:45:27] Even though I have an alibi. Yeah, but it was a little weird that your password was

[01:45:33] I don't know

[01:45:41] My password was place callback here. Thank you all for listening

[01:45:45] Thank you. I want to say thank you for having me. This was so much fun

[01:45:48] I'm like this was a good one. I get very excited every time there's a new episode up

[01:45:52] So thanks. This is good. I'm glad that I switched from the village to this. Yeah

[01:45:57] Had you seen the village?

[01:46:00] I believe I saw that in the theater with my sister. You got to see a new movie instead. I did

[01:46:06] We're glad you came Richard. It was great to see you. Well, thanks. It's very hot in here

[01:46:09] It is it's getting quite call me next on my trauma on film is the happening

[01:46:14] Correct

[01:46:15] And we are going to I might have to cut this out. I don't think so just because I haven't confirmed with him

[01:46:19] You should probably confirm with him

[01:46:20] Like keep it in if I then tell you that we've confirmed griffin. We're releasing this in like a day

[01:46:25] So, okay, okay our guests. I believe on the episode will be james urbaniak the great act very excited

[01:46:30] The great act james urbaniak will be our guest for the happening

[01:46:33] Which is the one that he special requested as well. Well, I've never seen the happening in full

[01:46:37] I think I watched about an hour plus of it on tv once get ready

[01:46:42] All right, I'll say it's my least favorite one

[01:46:45] Well, but have you already did right? It is and that's how it was advertised

[01:46:48] I haven't seen the last airbender. We should talk about how yeah, this movie was such a colossal bum

[01:46:52] And of course he leans right back to the farm. Yes. I did see that one

[01:47:00] I just want to end this one now. We're not gonna top that all right. Thanks for listening everybody

[01:47:04] Yes, uh and as always

[01:47:07] Keep on sprouting after your dream