Princess Mononoke with Griffin McElroy

[00:00:01] Blank Check with Griffin and David Blank Check with Griffin and David Don't know what to say or to express All you need to know is that the name of the show is Blank Check Life is suffering It is hard The world is cursed

[00:00:25] But still, you find reasons to keep podcasting I mean, that's my mantra That's why you get up in the morning What happens every time I walk in the studio? You go, Griffin, what's up? He's just for the listener Flails his arms What's new? What's up? I do that

[00:00:45] You do Kermit Arms and you demand that I give you info And I go, nothing's new, everything's terrible The world is awful, I hate everything And then you go, let's podcast Right? That's pretty much the conversation every time It's the tonal vibes Even if those aren't the words

[00:00:59] That is the back and forth I'm trying to be like, woo And you're like, wow, wow And I go, everything's bad And you go, our podcast is good He's such a big fan Do I just hop in whenever he's here? Oh, hop, oh, yes Okay, light the fucking

[00:01:17] Yeah man, all the time Yeah dude For sure, for sure, for sure Hell yeah Yeah, totally My mon? My mon Alright man, cool This is a cool environment Yeah, I'm still on island time I like how you have all these Papa Zan chairs Around the studio

[00:01:36] Thank you, thank you We try to, you know, it's For us, it's more of a Hangout than a show Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, for me, they call it work But it doesn't feel like it does it No, I mean if this is work

[00:01:49] I've never worked a day in my life Yeah, if this is work, I don't want to see play Yeah What's play going to look like an office job? Do you think we can keep this going for two hours? 100% I'm sweating You think, you think

[00:02:03] I feel like I'm on a treadmill right now Here's the honest truth I didn't watch the movie so if we just do this Like serve each other You've never seen it Yeah, yeah I've actually never seen any movies You've never seen any movies No, I've heard of them

[00:02:15] They're like the long TV shows So you've seen TV shows Oh yeah man You love those Cheers Am I supposed to cut, what's your cuss policy? On here Oh, hardcore custom Oh good, good, good Some people complain about it sometimes They go, I like the show Really?

[00:02:32] I wish their mouths were a little less filthy Ah, fuck you Oh that feels, I would never say that Yeah, eat my turds I gotta say already this is off to a rip or instraught And this is what I always wanted

[00:02:45] Because we all know it's a long standing issue With the show that I cannot get a word in edge wise We've been doing this show for over four years And this has yet to in any way reflect Yeah, you don't get to talk about your interests

[00:02:58] Or anything like that At all I got no steak in this show I feel like a silent business partner And you know why? Why? It's because I'm always outnumbered Okay Oh right Sure At the very best this podcast has one third griffin Right

[00:03:16] If we have a guest it's one fourth If we have multiple guests It could be as much as like one sixth Yeah Terrible But today for the first time this podcast 50% griff baby So I'm gonna bend sort of at the waist like this And stick my arms out

[00:03:30] Perfect And you just grab my hands like that I got it Now we're gonna fuse Have you done this before? This one is doing this I've tried to do this with other guests And it doesn't work No, it's gotta be two griffins So we can fuse together

[00:03:42] They're shaking There's no guarantee that we will be able to separate After this Right Are you okay? Yeah, no, no It's much of course like the mythical griffin That's half lion We're gonna turn to a mythical creature That's half griffin, half griffin Right, exactly But just two heads

[00:03:56] Two heads, no legs It's like a cat dog Like a cat dog Yeah, yeah, yeah Your arms can be the Yeah, right It's a long neck A head on each side It looks sort of like a dumbbell Yeah, it looks like a hot dog Flanked by eagle heads

[00:04:12] What is cat dog doing these days, you think? What's cat dog up to these days? Anyways, what cat dog do? Well, you could even add up The life expectancy of a dog and a cat Yeah It's still just statistically is probably dead as disco

[00:04:24] What if you're like compounds though? You know what I mean? You don't add your multiple Oh, I see, I see I feel like cat dog moved behind the camera You know what I'm saying? I feel like Right, cat dog is like now

[00:04:36] He's one of those guys who directs a lot of madam secretaries He's like Eric Stoltz Or it's like Brian Robbins Where he's now just an exact cat Nickelodeon Remember when Nick Cannon ran the end? And they were like No, he's actually running the network He's a mogul

[00:04:50] Yeah, that's what cat dogs look like Okay, cool Ended Our guest today of course is Griffin McElroy Are you ready to fuse? Are you ready? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah So you just want to push So Ben if you could insert like a sort of

[00:05:02] You know, sort of anime style No sound effects necessary This is gonna really happen No sound effects necessary Yeah, of course You'll hear it, like you Have you ever heard one person's bones And turn another person's body? It makes a sound We're finally gonna catch them

[00:05:16] You know, you can make them a squelch Yeah, yeah Sort of like a crunchy squelch Yeah, okay And no sound effects necessary It's gonna happen for real Also Ben, mark this to find some sound effects Okay, ready? I can't wait to see in an episode's metric

[00:05:41] Exactly when we got to zero listeners Oh, see, okay, hold up Here's the problem, you pushed too hard Okay, so yeah Now all your stuff's inside my stuff Fuck So I've got two skulls Yeah Two rib cages So this is getting bad

[00:05:54] I don't even know where your voice is coming from Um, I'm sort of just like Pushing wind out of my now hollow skin bag Okay, okay, okay So you're kind of like a bagpipe Yeah Okay, ready? I'm gonna pull this time, okay? Okay, but let's not overdo it

[00:06:11] Okay, okay, I'll try to put a meter on this Okay, ready? Okay Oh no, now you got all my bones Oh boy, I'm feeling heavy If only we could say, hey, what the fuck, man What? You saying I got heavy bones? You got some

[00:06:28] No, I'm just saying I got double bones now I think that was a bone dig That was not a bone dig Hey, because I didn't say that When I had your bones, I didn't say that shit He didn't talk about it

[00:06:38] But then when you have my bones in you You're like, these are some hefty bones I didn't say that I just said I have a lot in me right now I mean look, look around this room Do you see Alan Grant anywhere?

[00:06:49] Because if this were a bone dig Paleontologist Alan Grant would be here He'd be here with his big claw He uses to assault children His bone claw He is very mean to one child And was the fan theory that that child is Chris Pratt?

[00:07:08] Is that the fan theory? The fan theory The great fan theory The great fan theory I love when fan theories are like That one kid, he's Chris Pratt now That one kid, he's Iron Man now Or whatever What's up with this? It's really cool when people do that

[00:07:23] It's cool Because it was formerly just a scene in a movie Disgusting Now it's the most important scene in cinema history And I'm the only one who knows Yes The Pixar theory that every Pixar movie is connected They're on the same universe and like the monster world

[00:07:38] Has something to do with the Brave Witch They all got that stupid lamps in all of them Yup, yup, and the ball And here's the thing That theory makes the movies so much better Yes, yes I feel so bad for anyone who watches those movies

[00:07:52] And doesn't realize that cars takes place after a bug's life When the bugs have wiped out the earth Wait, is that the theory? Cars in the theory, cars is like the end Right, that's the last world Right It's like that so far in the future

[00:08:07] That there are only cars now So that suggests that at the end of Wally All of the pilgrims come back And try to start a new world And fail Or are turned into cars by a witch One or the other I think the witch from Brave is responsible

[00:08:23] She's responsible for like 18 fifths Right, all the magical stuff Like the toys only come to life because the witch and Brave fucked up Right, yes, that's exactly right I like that it all hinges on the witch I'm sorry, I'm wrong Monsters Inc. is the end of the universe

[00:08:43] The monsters kill the cars Yes How is that possible? Because the doors are going to the past I don't know, look I don't know why I brought this up Listen, either way, this is so cool It's so good Yeah, I love it, man

[00:09:00] It's what I want out of art I went to a theme park I was in a retired bit Barcelona Barcelona I was in Barcelona You're in Whitstilman's Barcelona I was in Whitstilman's Barcelona And I went to a theme park that is

[00:09:17] One of the oldest theme parks in the world I would not want to go to that Yeah, right This was... Age is not a bragging thing for theme parks Let me sell this to you I would like to attend the newest theme park in the world

[00:09:29] Here's what I want Where they're like, we opened it a year ago Lots of people have tried it out, it's fine That's it It's all computers This is this place's cell This place goes, we started construction in 1895 When wood was discovered

[00:09:45] And the entire theme park is a top of mountain And all of the rides at the very tippy top Are all height based So their big ride is like it's a little tin airplane And it flies around the top of the mountain So it feels like you're flying

[00:10:01] In a little private Lindbergh plane Right But the place is called... I keep on getting the name wrong Because the name of the place sounds like Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo I was wondering how you were going to circle on back I think it's called Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo But every time

[00:10:23] Micro friends, Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo, I would get the name wrong I think it's just the sounds that he's making Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Dee-Baa-Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Tee-Bee-Dee-Boo Tee-Bee-Doo-Boo Man, this bit's going on the highlight reel Where are you? Why did you do this to yourself?

[00:10:47] Can we get serious for a moment? Okay, sorry, very serious. Introduce the podcast and our guest please Okay, this podcast... It's distracting by the way, you have two sets of bones Can you guys just finish?

[00:10:57] Do you want to just... Okay, I'm gonna give the bones back to you Give me the leg bones Keep the arm bones, let's call the whole thing off He was almost introducing the podcast And then he had to redo the 11th season of bones Cool

[00:11:10] 11th season of bones, they sure had fun with bones I think that's what happens in the 11th season Where they were like, we're out of crimes But this year their bones got all mixed up Season 11 is the one with all the skeleton warriors

[00:11:24] Where she's like, who did this murder? Oh, an actual skeleton It's I Lord Merrow It's where they all become set designers for the Texas Chainsaw franchise Oh boy Yeah, what if that happened in a procedural about the government? It's like season 8 is like, Trump cut our budget

[00:11:42] Now we're freelancers and they're like set designers We gotta make bones here now Is bones still on? Bones is not still on Okay, bones is done Bones is done Bones ran for a gentleman's 11 seasons That's right Yes No, 12, gentlemen's 12 Gentlemen's 12? A dozen

[00:11:59] It didn't make it to a baker's dozen Which would have been nice How many episodes is that? 246 bones Oh my God How many human, how many bones does the human body have? Like 70 That's a good question Are there more episodes of bones or bones? 206

[00:12:14] Bones, the TV show beat it by 40 Wow Now, okay boys You understand that they didn't feature a bone What if they did though? They were like this time it's fourth finger on your right hand It's like yeah, the top one Yeah Alright

[00:12:33] That would be nice though if each episode of bones was like We gotta crack the shin The case of the shin You choose the podcast Blank check with Griffin and David And Griffin You see what I did there? Griffin and David and Griffin Ah, a little David sandwich

[00:12:53] You know what I'm saying? Yeah Oh boy I'm just trying to get used to my new sort of composition Oh yeah It's an honor, thank you for having me You're now all lower body density And I'm all upper body density Yeah It's a podcast about filmographies

[00:13:11] Directors who have massive success early on in their career And are given a series of blank checks Make whatever crazy passion projects they want And sometimes those checks clear And sometimes they bounce baby And this is mini-series on the films of Hayo Miyazaki Today we're covering Princess Mononoke

[00:13:27] That's right What's the mini-series called? It's called Howl's Moving Podcast Thank you And we got with us Griffin McAury The Adventure Zone And my brother, my brother and me And 80,000 other podcasts Yeah that's true And from Princess Mononoke I was in it You were in it? Yeah

[00:13:43] Who are you? I was one of those wild little rattly ghosts Oh yeah Little little attorney Little Little little Yeah I'm interested to see how this series goes Cause I don't know That Miyazaki has made a bad film He has not He is not This is correct

[00:14:05] I don't know if y'all were about to go just like Hard in the paint Dunk on Ponyo How dare you I would never dunk on my beloved Ponyo She's a good person There are a couple things that you need to know Good fish Okay

[00:14:20] Couple things you need to know One, Ponyo loves him Ponyo do love him I'm always saying that Number two, Ponyo loves Satsuki Yeah, that's all you need And here's number three And this is the biggest twist David loves Ponyo Hell yeah Does that mean that by transitive probably

[00:14:36] I also love Heyman Sosuke Correct I do if it's true Ponyo is one of your top five movie friends Right? If you have to rank As I have said on this podcast Ponyo is a movie that I watch to calm myself down If I'm in a bad mood

[00:14:47] Ponyo That weirdly enough That's like spirited away Spirited away is like my chicken soup Like I am sick I'm too sick to move I'm just going to put this movie on That's another one That one is like That's like a toxic purging Toxins purging movie for me

[00:15:02] That's your Russian bath house Seriously By the end of it I'm always like Oh yeah I always kind of I always get emotional At the end Like I just like I suddenly remember That him turning Well, no spoilers No spoilers But Haku is a river

[00:15:18] Well that's a huge spoiler Arguably the Spoiler from that film Well This is Princess Mononoke Which at the time of its release Was not only Miyazaki's biggest film But the highest grossing film in the history of Japan Japan's biggest film Japan's wild Japan's biggest film Ever

[00:15:37] It was only dethroned by spirited away Wasn't it dethroned by Titanic Which then was dethroned by spirited away Titanic dethroned it Titanic dethroned it Yeah I mean it is It's still It was still the most profitable Japanese Yes, absolutely Right

[00:15:52] It was the most successful domestic film in Japan And then spirited away Spirited away has held the title since And then Titanic Titanic ruined so many great streaks For so many different Beloved movie franchises I remember being a youngster And being so excited When my favorite movie

[00:16:10] At the time came out And dethroned Titanic And that was Lost in Space Yes Of course Starting Matt LeBlanc No, we did an episode of Lost in Space We have done an episode on Lost in Space And an important work of movie making

[00:16:23] It does not fit into the model What we usually discuss on this podcast at all But we did an episode with David and his brother Where we talked about Lost in Space Because it was their favorite VHS That's a good one Got that soundtrack Got Apollo 440

[00:16:37] Got a lot of arena rock On that bad boy Yes, that's right And you've got the three alphas Harry Oldman, William Hurd, Matt LeBlanc I love your wife I love your wife We have to go through the Planet Core We are Lost in Space Blarp Blarp

[00:16:58] Don't forget Blarp Griffin, did you forget Blarp? I did, I forgot about Blarp And I swore I'd never won Well, he's in there We came up with a term based on that movie Which is when a film blarps its female characters Yes

[00:17:13] It gives them some business that has nothing to do with anything Oh, we have to go chase Blarp Now we don't have to explain why they're not In the last 30 minutes of the movie They're dealing with Blarp Yeah, they're blarping They're blarping This movie does not blarp

[00:17:24] No, not at all This movie is... Well, it came out in 97 in Japan Maybe it dethroned Titanic Isn't that post-Titanic? No, no, it's pre-Titanic Sorry, sorry No, it's... Titanic's 98 Right Well, late 97 Right, right, right But that's why I'm trying... Did this come out early 97? Yeah

[00:17:45] And then was dethroned by... Titanic Yeah, like months after it got to the title Okay, okay But then Spirited Away, you know, suplexed Titanic It's suplexed Yeah Chihiro and Baba, they took Titanic and they... They folded Titanic like laundry Exactly Yeah But wait, what was I gonna say?

[00:18:05] Well, female characters, I don't know, this thing's got them It's got an anti-blarp Right, yeah It's got an anti-blarp Now here's the thing I want to get right off the bat Because I was, ahem, confused There is Moro the Wolf Moro the Wolf, he's cool Yes

[00:18:21] In this film Oh, are you gonna talk about the dub? Yes, in the dub played by... A lady Jillian Anderson Yes Yes Yes, that's right Is that the question? So then it was going into... Wait, I have the answer, yes Okay, fair enough Okay, moving on

[00:18:36] No, what was your question? It was going into the Wikipedia Because I was like, is this them sort of rewriting the movie to some degree Because I know this was notorious as like the worst of the dubs Yeah, and the first... Really? The first...

[00:18:51] I feel like it was at the time I don't think that's... Really? It's more than it's release was so screwed up Right By Miramax It was the first effort to like, let's put this in American theaters It's like, here's Haomi Azaki He's a Japanese master

[00:19:04] This was like the first proper theatrical release of one of his movies We got a proper release with like, proper big name actors American actors doing the dub Right And then Miramax released it, limited And then they didn't really expand it

[00:19:16] Like, they kind of decided not to go for it Right So no one really got to see it Yeah And then the DVD release was like, not until a long time later And initially they were only going to release it with the dub Uh-huh

[00:19:28] And all the fans were like, please release the original audio track too And they were like, oh okay, well that means it's not going to come out for a while Like it came out later, you know, like they just sort of like, just handled everything

[00:19:38] And I think the dub itself is bad I guess the cast on the Sky one's more notorious for changing the movie That one's bad because that one like changes the music Right And I think the original Totoro dub is bad Sure Yeah

[00:19:51] Well from what I understand for Mononoke is the There were a lot of things changed in the English version Right Just because there are certain like Either, not really concepts but like deep Japanese folklore That would take like forever to Right Like explicitly says them in this movie

[00:20:10] And it is like an interpretation of that folklore that I know that Miramax pushed back big time on and wanted all these changes But the adaptation, wasn't it written by Neil Gaiman? It was Didn't he do this?

[00:20:23] Yeah, so I would be blown away if this was the worst I don't think in terms of the translation I just know people always had gripes about like The actual vocal performances Billy Bob Thornton goes like full kind of Billy Bob Thornton sucks shit in this movie

[00:20:35] Yeah, he does not do good And like it's so It is so devoid of energy and so like does not match That is my problem with a lot of things Yeah It just feels like they went in for a day and they were like

[00:20:49] What's this dialogue? Okay, I will defeat you evil spirit What's the next line? You know, I would be like Hi, how are you doing? What's the next line? Right, and I think What were you gonna say? Claire Danes kind of

[00:20:59] It ranks above Billy Bob Thornton but is not my favorite But like many driver crushes it Like I think many driver is an amazing abosha And Billy Crudup, you know, not the most exciting Dynamic role to play But he does fine

[00:21:13] I think everybody does fine in this movie Except for Billy Bob Thornton who does like I said earlier Sucks shit I guess it was just I had heard so much about how bad Billy Bob Thornton was that I assumed the entire dub was bad I don't think so

[00:21:25] Keith David crushes it like everybody's getting this one Well, so this was the thing, the Jillian Harrison thing I was like are they rewriting this character a little bit to make her female And they start digging into it and the character is referred to as female

[00:21:38] As the mother wolf Right And the Japanese actor who plays Moro He's like hey what's up Deep voice but is historically a drag queen performer Hey Hmm I don't know enough about the sort of I think it's a little interesting It is very interesting

[00:21:55] But I kind of like the idea where it's like yes, I'm the mother wolf Wolves have deep ass voices Right So that's how it is Right No effort to rather than like Get Rosie O'Donnell Like whatever Disney did right Yeah

[00:22:09] Like who's a funny lady who can play the animal That is the thing with these dubs is they feel so much like the product of like Who's at just the right level of like Not gonna tell us to fuck off Right But like we know their voice Right

[00:22:25] They're kind of a hot name But it also feels like them being like just do the thing that you do Like don't try to fit the character too much By and large And then you'll read like interviews with many driver Interviews with Mark Hamill where they're like

[00:22:37] I took this seriously Sure I'm giving a performance Versus like someone like Billy Bob who's like yeah that was an afternoon They told me he was like an idiot so I just did the sling blade voice So is there a problem Said something about some big crazy

[00:22:51] Boar monster That was a really bad Billy Bob's sort of impression He's kind of hard to do What is, no but yeah I need to rewatch Armageddon That's the one where he has like 18 lines It's the size of Texas sir

[00:23:03] You know like where he every line he says is like some folksy nonsense Yeah Like he just drank a big ball of barbecue sauce before each take I miss Billy Bob just being in like Five movies a year Remember when Billy Bob would just crop up and everything

[00:23:16] Yeah well he was on the Amazon original series Goliath I think that got it renewed That's coming back Did it? Yeah third season Goliath I feel like the third season has already aired Am I wrong about that? Well I don't know

[00:23:30] I don't know if you've noticed but Amazon's been doing this thing Where they just nine months later go Oh yeah no we're not making more of that After not announcing anything ever No season two aired the last year

[00:23:42] And they just announced that there will be a third season They just announced Okay fair enough So that's just keeping him busy Also of course we know his musical act The box tops I think they're called What's that what they're called? Box cutters The box cutters

[00:23:57] The box spinners It's got dirt It's something with box in it It's the box masters It's the box masters? I don't know what to tell you It's the box masters It's a Hillbilly British invasion music Correct Okay and I'm reading that from a computer

[00:24:17] He calls it Hillbilly Mod Rock What? I guess you can call anything anything Yeah you can But guys let's go to a box masters show This sounds fun Hillbilly Mod Rock You guys have all seen the interview with Billy Bob Thornton Yes

[00:24:31] Right where they ask him a question About balancing his acting as music career And then he starts talking about his hobbies as a child I have no choice Right he won't answer the questions directly It's an interview with noted sex criminal Gian Gomesci Yeah But he goes like

[00:24:49] So what's it like balancing your acting career And music career And he goes like When I was a young child I loved movie monsters I would buy Remco model kits And I would read famous monsters of film land And there was a contest one time when I won

[00:25:06] And then I'll ask him another question And he'll go like I used to play baseball And he's like not answering directly And then he goes I feel like you're being obtuse and he goes Well you know you're going to treat what I like to do as a hobby

[00:25:19] Then I'll tell you about some hobbies I have Wow And his attitude was We had an agreement that you would not ask me any questions about acting Oh sure And he was trying to like sneak and act You know what I'm correcting myself

[00:25:32] He didn't even ask a question about acting He in the introduction said A band which includes Billy Bob Thornton Who you might know from his film work That was that was that crossed the line Had only prepared music questions

[00:25:43] And Billy Bob was so angry that they contextualized him As a movie star Now the wind up for this is the other day I was at a comic book store And I was at the clearance shelf And I found that there is a Boxmasters graphic novel Oh wow

[00:25:58] Because the mythos of the boxmasters Is too big for the six albums they release a year Cause they're one of these bands that goes like We're so prolific and all of it's so good We have to release 800 songs a year The boxmasters graphic novel on the back goes

[00:26:13] A band comprised of Billy Bob Thornton Film actor director And parentheses on the back They're traveling through time Attempting to destroy the history of rock and roll They're trying to stop the person who's attempting to destroy the history of rock and roll Okay They're the saviors

[00:26:30] Well for $150 you can meet the boxmasters Go to a show, get a photo with them And pick up a VIP pass Let's do it Yeah August 10th in Vegas, you wanna go? Yeah I'm gonna do that and wear my Monsters Ball T-shirt

[00:26:43] That I got from the release party My eagle eye baseball cap Eagle eye I'm trying to think of other Billy Bob Thornton projects I remember this interview when he was doing press for eagle eye And they were like so what attracted you to the script

[00:26:57] And he was like My agent calls me like every couple of years And goes Billy you gotta do another movie where you're at a bus stop What? And he was like what? And he was like you know the thing where you're on the poster at the bus stop

[00:27:09] So it'd been about three years and they offered me this But like that is to me the epitome of a Billy Bob role Is just like Shia LaBeouf gets brought into you know some jail Son do you know what you're doing here You're in some real trouble son

[00:27:24] Like just Billy Bob comes in in a suit and you're like oh shit Son there's an eagle eye You either are or are in the sights of an eagle eye Son Son Tommy Lee Jones was busy He turned us the hell down so here I am

[00:27:39] Son my agent said I need to be in a bus stop So you get Bebo Yeah You think he calls himself Bebo? He does yeah He does Will it bad Santa too That was like a couple years ago And that made the bus stop I think

[00:27:55] It didn't do well but it certainly made the bus stop That was certainly like a big departure for Miyazaki That's what it says too Yeah that was pretty weird when he made that one I contend with our original statement He has never made a bad film

[00:28:11] Never made a bad one Yeah sure From Castle of Cackleostro to Bad Santa too All of them are masterpieces And he didn't make Bad Santa 1 which is weird I didn't know that at all He actively expressed his dislike for it in fact He said the Santa

[00:28:24] He said I could do that better And Bebo was like prove it And they proved it He had to go in and pitch on Bad Santa 2 And he said I think the thing that truly makes Santa bad Is his lack of relationship with nature

[00:28:37] And they gave him the job in the room So Santa just like wandering through the forest Like encountering spirits Who is good enough to really decide he is Bad Santa So he's looking for good Santa That does sound like it doesn't exist A Miyazaki take away

[00:28:53] Yeah it shades his gray Santa What God has deemed him Bad Santa Princess Mononoke A film I had not seen before Oh wait this was one of the Well no you haven't seen most of it I haven't seen most of it Haven't seen it before

[00:29:09] Yeah Griff is discovering Miyazaki Yeah basically I kinda went on the same trip I got the for like 2 Christmas 2017 I got the whole Miyazaki collection on Blu-ray And I had only seen like Castle of Cackleostro And I think Spear of Way that may have been it

[00:29:25] And I just tore through them It's a delightful journey Were you a Lupin fan? Did you see Cackleostro through that? Or had you seen them in Cackleo Animal? No I dad used to get Just like VHS's Sent to the house

[00:29:40] And I don't know if it was on some sort of Mailer or what And he got a lot of anime Like sent to him Which neither of us really watched But then we got a copy Of Castle of Cackleostro And he was like oh I've actually heard

[00:29:52] This is good And we watched it together When I was like 8 or 9 Oh wow And I was like oh actually this is the Raddest thing ever It rocks That movie is the best It was not, that's still Yeah still like a really really great

[00:30:04] On-boarding to the rest of Miyazaki Even though it's not really like the rest of it But yeah that was sort of where I came And then Spear of Way I don't know I feel like everybody saw that That was the one Right

[00:30:15] I knew that this was sort of like This is like his serious like epic This is like his big like fantasy Action movie epic I did not realize that it's literally A movie about like man fighting nature Hell yeah This is his themes like Like made flesh right

[00:30:34] Right The stuff that Totoro is sort of about Right Right like you know our humanity Our oneness with nature has been Disrupted Right Like what is man's relationship To the outside world But this is like a sword Like epic version of the happening Well Well wait a second

[00:30:54] In the worst imaginable light Is he on to something? Wait a second No it is like it's in the What is the name? Is there a genre for the fern gully avatar Like battle between Bad man and good nature In viral epic Right Eco adventure Yeah

[00:31:16] An eco adventure Yeah It's like an eco vengeance movie Like bioto Yeah Yeah Yeah it's a It's a timeless story of Polyshore versus the world The living world Exactly We all know that the world has been Against Polyshore But what if for this movie

[00:31:35] Polyshore was against the world You mentioned like a Miyazaki-esque take And I feel like this is about where In his career like if you did not know What that dude was about And Where his like His sort of disillusionment with life started

[00:31:54] I think you could probably clock it Clock it right here at Princess Mononoke Yeah cause this the other movies Up until this point are sort of like Cut with some sense of like There are characters living these Pure joyful lives Right In some corner of his tapestry

[00:32:14] Or like their sadness is cut With like moments of like Whimsical bliss or whatever This is like a film about like a world That maybe doesn't deserve to exist anymore Yeah it's super yeah I um it's funny I actually

[00:32:29] I know I mentioned that I'm not like a huge anime fan But I did watch all of Neon Genesis Evangelion In like two and a half days on Netflix Just the new right right It's not new it's Is it worth it? Yeah it's a

[00:32:42] Not in a every second of it was good And enjoyable way but in a like I've never quite seen anything like it way It was funny watching this right after Binging Eva because it's It is similarly sort of Maybe we don't deserve to exist

[00:32:59] Maybe actually way more explicitly about that But yeah the themes The themes were pretty compatible I'd say Griffin if I can just correct your correction quickly Yeah You said it's not new it's just new to Netflix I don't know if you know this

[00:33:14] But shows don't exist until they're on Netflix You're right I'm sorry I apologize And also if something gets removed from Netflix It no longer exists I'm so sad that the office is leaving They're canceling the office Unavailable otherwise there's no way to watch the office Friends is cancelled

[00:33:30] Yeah right the office leaving Netflix Means that no one can do any office And friends leaving means that no one can have friends Stop this office They're just gonna torch that wing Of the library of congress Done What if that's the library of congress

[00:33:46] Now it's just some guy who's like isn't on Netflix They got it They don't delete anything right It's just data It's just servers Every time a website posts one of those Here's everything leaving Netflix this month For me that's like the in-memorium segment of the Oscars

[00:34:03] Saying goodbye to some Classic shows and movies Lost to the sands of time I just still can't get over The fact that Netflix successfully pulled off the hood Wank where You aired on Lifetime A full season The pen badge Lee series You aired on another channel Full season

[00:34:25] Then they produced a second season Yes Nine months later Netflix was like We'll buy both seasons They put it up a year after it had aired Maybe a little less And everyone's like, huh Netflix original Great new show about you No one believed me when I told them

[00:34:42] That that show had aired On broadcast television Stop swinging a torch around No I believe me Griffin stop climbing up that mountain to yell No I won Believe me It doesn't exist until it's on Netflix And Princess Mononoke It's not yet on Netflix so it doesn't exist

[00:35:03] It's an idea Right it's an idea I was wondering if These are gonna pop up in on the Disney plus app or whatever it's called This is coming in November They will not Miyazaki forbids it Yeah A Disney Let go of all the Miyazaki the G. Bleu rights

[00:35:18] Oh I didn't know that It's an independent company called G Kids Who's behind all the theatrical releases And now all the physical media releases But Miyazaki also will Not allow his movies to be streaming Whether for purchase or for free Won't allow it

[00:35:34] Can you put it in a river Can you Can you put a DVD in the river Yes he would love that He's very into that He's been clear Right He will let his movies Broke He won't let them stream No but I think we've talked about this

[00:35:54] I got to I met the guy who's the head of G Kids And was talking to him about it And he was just like There's no argument you can make That will sell him on it He just doesn't like the idea of the things Streaming

[00:36:10] And there's no amount of money that would change his mind Because he already owns a house and he likes it Yeah that's He's got a modest house And he's like what more do I need He's like the judge that can't be bought

[00:36:20] In like a Batman movie where he's like I've got everything I want A house, a chair, pencils I've got like 200 pictures of airplanes Right One tree I've got one tree and it's covered in pictures of airplanes And just a limitless Brilliant that's the other thing he's got

[00:36:41] Yeah, no but I mean I think I don't think that's ever going to change And it's weird because the thing that has created Is A, these are some of the most torrented movies Sure Now They're stolen online Right because people are used to

[00:36:55] If I can't watch something this easily I'll break the law And on the flip side they're Now still some of the best selling Physical media Of course right It's like the Disney vault It drives people to Right Which is wild because I feel like it only Recently became

[00:37:15] Possible to get all of it Like I would not have bought all these films piecemeal I got the Miyazaki collection like the day it came out Which wasn't until like a few years ago Like it's a very new thing To be able to grab all these

[00:37:27] When rises, yeah And then like a year after that Disney let the rights go And so now they've all been re-released as piecemeal And everyone's waiting for The new releases to be Recollected But I have to imagine that falls under Something where he has approval over them

[00:37:43] I imagine there's some reason that G Kids hasn't immediately put them all in one box It'll happen I assume, he's got a new movie coming Maybe at that point Bad Santa 3 Bad Santa 3 Bad Santa 3 Hardly Santay I don't know Mononoke Let's talk about the movie Right? Yes

[00:38:07] It opens with some of the wildest shit I've ever seen I could not believe it It really is a cold open too Where you're like, oh so it's like a guy in a Wait what's happening, you know what I mean? It's like a waterboard open It's like, yeah

[00:38:22] There's like pouring ice water down your throat Especially since like, I'm trying to think like You know, Porcarossa, what does it open on? Pig sitting in a chair Taking a nap Magazine on his face, taking a nap Toro, what does that open with?

[00:38:34] Like some kids move into a new house And they run around Gentle Those gentlies into this new world This movie opens with a giant boar Infested by demon worms Yes, made of evil spaghetti Infantely writhing meat chuck Yeah And a battle And a battle between a young prince

[00:39:02] And his dad Yes, the Patriots Right? Is that his dad? I don't know I don't know, father figure The fatherly man Are you talking about the elk? Because I don't think the elk is his dad Well I mean let's say this though Elk is daddy

[00:39:21] Yeah, the elk's pretty cool Elk in this movie? It was kind of zady Yeah For an elk For an elk Yeah If we're talking about like Miyazaki Four spirits that can get it Yeah, sure And it's a long list You know, I mean, Toro's thick

[00:39:37] Toro is mad thick He's swole He's swole Radish spirit I don't know if you remember But he can get it The spirit of the way is just loaded With hot spirits You know, you maybe don't recall I said the rewars It's got a lot of hot spirits

[00:39:53] And I don't mean because they're in a bath Yeah, no face But a ton of ass He's fighting spaghetti boy Ashitaka That's his name, right? Yeah He's a village prince And what do we think 15th, 16th century Japan A song where the comedians had the Muromachi Japan

[00:40:19] It's sometime between 1336 15th, or 17th Somewhere in there Mevil Japan And he gets a worm arm He gets a worm arm From this battle Right, he gets a How do they call it? It's not a bite, it's not a rash

[00:40:41] But he's got a burn from the dark spirit Yeah, like a curse He's got a curse He's got a curse because he Shadow of the Colossus is this boar But touches it Mid-fight and gets a curse Right And so now he's got this evil in his arm

[00:40:56] He's got an evil arm in his arm Occasionally like Dr. Strange loves And tries to grab his sword and kill people Right This is also the point in the movie Where I on my first watch realized It was not going to be like my neighbor Totoro

[00:41:09] When the spaghetti boar Was walking, melts Like melts on the molecular level Down to gore covered bones And I was like Okay, okay, okay Then the movie totally chills out by Having him decafotate people with arrows Repeatedly Their head pops off

[00:41:29] What I love about the violence in this movie Because it's a violent ass movie Very violent and he really has never made a movie this violent Like Nassica and Porcaraso have action Yeah But I don't know about violence But this is full blown

[00:41:43] He shoots a lot of arrows at samurai And their heads and arms go flying off But even that is done in what I feel like Is such a gibly-esque way Where there's not sprays of blood They just kind of turn into like ham hocks

[00:41:59] They just kind of turn into the perfect Like circle of meat Cross section of meat with a little circular bone In there with no blood And it's just like, oh okay It's like, it's fun It's fun dismemberment It is weird too also like when the evil animals

[00:42:13] Are like dripping with blood It doesn't look like blood is like spraying off of them It looks like the blood has just become part of their being If that makes any sense Like they're just like, and this is where I bleed There's so many like

[00:42:26] Upsetting visuals in this movie Which is such a stark contrast to Everything else that That gibly-esque is made right Because it's all about like You know, on the complete opposite end of the spectrum Is Ponyo where like every inch of the screen Is filled with some beautiful thing

[00:42:43] And in this one, like even the woods Are you know, arboreal and pretty But they also look like a place where If you step foot into them You'll be killed in the most horrible way Imagine, like there's so many uninviting things In this movie

[00:42:56] Not the least of which being The big spaghetti monsters Big spaghetti monsters are scary But then even the benevolent things Like the creepy little The scariest, yeah Head switching things And the fucking like spirit of the forest Who is, if I was a kid

[00:43:12] I would be scared of The deer with the like, you know, red face Who's like smiling? What's up with that? The little twitchy clockwork head face guys Kodomo, yeah They're like the cute characters in the movie Like they're the only characters in the movie

[00:43:29] Who like graphically look kind of like adorable Gibly characters But also everything about how they move And sound is terrifying Yeah, I feel like it's really cute how At the climax of the movie Hundreds and hundreds of their corpses fall From the sky Like so many snowflakes

[00:43:45] I think it's really cute And I want to buy a stuff that I'm gonna have today I mean they're like a hop and a step away From like the little grudge monster The little white boy with the eyes Yeah, we talked about like In all of his movies

[00:43:57] There was usually like one big like Animation like showcase thing Where it's like The bridge collapsing You know where like he like Animates like a thousand splinters of wood Or like the shirts ripping or whatever This like the most detailed kinetic Kind of element is

[00:44:16] And this movie like starts with that With wild spaghetti boy And then I'm like wow That's like that looks like it's a bitch To animate like there's so much writhing Movement and detail around him right And then it turns out that that's just a repeated That's CGI

[00:44:32] No, no, no, no Is it? Isn't it? There's some CGI for the wriggling This is the first movie where they Interesting, because I know certainly with When you get to like the sort of Water spirit at the end That looks like that has CGI aggraination

[00:44:48] I think this is just the first time he Dained to allow CG assistance I was gonna say I had no idea how he did it Because then they keep on having Creatures be infested by spaghetti worms Like it just keeps happening Exactly, yes Yeah And yeah I'm just

[00:45:06] Mostly hand drawn Incorporates some use of computer animation For like five minutes of footage So yeah and always is a blend Spirit of the way has it too with the Flower You know he starts to just sort of Like inch towards The spaghetti worms looked hand drawn

[00:45:22] To me it was stuff at the end that Looked a little CGI augmented But He goes to the elder And she tells him Look I don't know if there's anything we can do She's kinda like Wait you got one of those What is it, evil arm?

[00:45:40] Oh wait you're telling me it was a Spaghetti bore Oh fuck There's a book about that And takes down book with giant skull And cross bones Yeah You got EAS, evil arm syndrome It's no good very bad don't do it So yeah he's gotta go They find out

[00:45:58] Well that's the thing they're like Look probably you're fucked There's a small chance If you go into the deepest Darkest spookiest parts of the forest You might be able to find something But no promises And this is I guess he lives in the nice place Pretty good

[00:46:16] He lives in like bucolic nice place No He lives in the place that five hundred years ago Was completely Hulkamania ran over it And decimated the entire village I don't know that I would call that the nice place Like that is a small small Once ruined enclave

[00:46:33] Of a lifestyle that no longer can exist In this version of Japan This movie actually We gave it a hard time for falling into that Eco-adventure genre But I feel like it really explores a lot of Stuff around that

[00:46:49] Like it doesn't just say like these are the bad guys They want the fucking unobtainium from them It's like Everyone is bad No one is bad except for maybe like The forces of humanity that we don't actually see in this Or maybe you're represented by the bad

[00:47:05] Samurai forces that come in His little village is a symptom Of this rough transition of A pre-industrialized medieval environment Just discovering metals and things like that And mining the forest And chopping things down But they're like We're trying to live here

[00:47:25] And we're just trying to live and not be And we are disruptive Like that is We are the fucking iron ball That's in the bore that gave him worms Right And you're in one of those messy transition periods Between cyclical societal resets Where people are like

[00:47:42] What do we do now? What's humanity like? But I feel like that's why this movie rules more Yes, like you're saying Much more than Furncully Where the demon is just a pollution monster Or avatar Like where it's like No, but David actually can I say

[00:47:58] I don't know if you picked up on it Because it's very subtle Please do your bit The villain I'm so excited The villain in Furncully Is like a pollution monster What's his name again please You always forget And I always have to look it up It's Tim Curry

[00:48:13] It's Tim Curry His name's not Palluto It's not Palluto But like, you know It's a Jesus I always also forget how stupid he looks Hexas Wow Hexas is not great He's smoke Yeah, yeah He's a smoky guy He's a smoky toxic guy Rather than that

[00:48:33] The villains here are like Just like what we have done We were living 600 years on or whatever And we're like we know what we did Like this is just the beginning of that We're just this is the infestation It's so brilliant how Ashitaka is like

[00:48:48] Not one of the Parties in this conflict Like Ashitaka is an outside observer From this cloister That you know wants nothing to do with it But it's been pulled into it Because this spaghetti board was turned evil By this iron ball that somebody Shot into it

[00:49:05] And now like It's like they are getting the splash Damage of global warming Or whatever Even though like They had no part in it whatsoever Like he's being pulled in But doesn't give a shit About industrialization Versus preservation No like that's the thing Like everyone in this movie

[00:49:22] Is kind of just trying to survive Like there's no one trying to like Like seize great power No, you know They're also trying to live Bebos, I think you make a case That Bebo's character is not great Well Bebo's a little stanker I mean let me say

[00:49:39] This guy I feel like with him He's like an opportunist right? Look, I gotta live Like I'll grab what I can In the grand scheme of things He could be a lot more evil than he is Like he's kind of Unambitious He's a pain at the end

[00:49:58] When he's like grabbing the head and stuff Yeah I mean that's fucked up But it also just feels like As you said Like he's an opportunist He's like I don't know What's like the best thing I can do with this moment He's got no overarching schemes

[00:50:07] He's like a bad Santa He's kind of like a bad Santa It's like if Santa was But he's really good I think I'd describe him He's like sort of roly-poly Jolly usually Jolly I carry this around To surprise things in his sack or basket I'm writing this script

[00:50:24] It's like untitled Santa Who's not so good project But I can't think of a name for it You know what I mean No good Santa No good Santa No that doesn't That doesn't sound right That's a different name That's a very frightening name

[00:50:36] Who is that coming down the chimney? That's a wrong Santa It's a different Santa for Fosh Why do you have seven arms? That's the wrong Santa Oh boy We got the wrong Santa Why are there teeth coming out of your torso? He's just all teeth

[00:50:52] That's what wrong Santa is He's that tooth guy Remember the tooth monster? That's just all teeth From the show Yeah from the show You know the show that was like scary things I'm gonna find it for you now And you're gonna be very upset

[00:51:05] There's a show with a scary thing What is this? It's a tooth man It's a tooth man But what's this from? It was like the creepy pasta I think it was sci-fi It was sci-fi It was called Channel Zero It was on sci-fi And it was adapting

[00:51:18] Like the best creepy pastas Wow And one of them was like What if there was a guy He was all teeth Nothing else Delivering presents To good kids' houses And there he is So like his punch could turn into a bite? I like that That was a superpower

[00:51:37] From his tooth powers From Candle Cove That's what that was called Alright Candle Cove So anyway, and then Ashi Taka just starts Like splitting dudes in half Yes, right Yes, he has superpowers now Cause he's got one I do wish he had like an oversized arm

[00:51:53] That would have been fun Like he was out regaining the water Exactly You know what I mean? Like one of his arms is just double sized But I like his weird kind of like Gross burn Yes, it's gross And I like when sort of like It activates

[00:52:09] And then you have the sort of swirling Sort of smoke and aura around it I like that otherwise it's kind of like Oh, this is my shitty arm You know? Yeah, right So he, yeah, he meets Billy Bob I'm just gonna call him Billy Bob now

[00:52:28] Who sort of like fills him in on Great Forest Spirit Iron Town Right all that kind of stuff There is very subtly A Chekhov's gun setup Of the emperor once The animal, the forest spirit's head Because it's supposed to give you eternal life

[00:52:44] I'm sure that will come in handy later Which by the way, I don't think it does I think that head does not give you eternal life It just makes a giant sludge monster Like go everywhere Lots of trouble Like immediately bad when that head comes off

[00:52:59] Very quick response It's not like a monkey's paw thing Where like it turns out that it's bad to take it Like it's just like right away red alert Yeah But anyway Yeah, and then he goes to Iron Town Come on, let's talk Iron Town guys

[00:53:13] I don't know what else should we They can fill me in if I'm forgetting plot things No, I think you're there Yeah, I think we get to Iron Town Yeah I mean he sees the fight Right? We are introduced to the What is it? The Lord Asana

[00:53:30] Who is the other army In here Like the samurai who they have to fight Oh right, yeah It's just going into a town And just massacring everybody in it And that is where he sort of discovers his super strength When he starts splitting dudes Yes, yes, the Borklan

[00:53:48] I'm a big fan of Oh no, I was talking about the humans Oh I know But I want to bring in a group of guys that I like a lot Jago's Borklan Who hide out in Borskins Yeah, the Borskins is the coolest visual in the entire movie

[00:54:04] But when they have like what is it Like the blow darts peeking out of the eye holes of the boar Pretty spooky, pretty spooky stuff Very spooky, also just Well we're jumping, yeah I just like The boar daddy What's the boar daddy's name? Big boar Keith David

[00:54:22] Oh Koto Oh yes, just being like No these are definitely the boars They're back Great, cute I smell them Yeah I was worried about this is definitely the boars They stink like Pumba They stink like Pumba They are all singing Hakuna Matata What are you talking about?

[00:54:35] These guys have boar skin How could they be anything else but boars? They don't have visible moving legs Sometimes boars do that They have no eyes Their skin is flapping Your entire clan is dead Yeah I mean how come's Razer? They came back

[00:54:51] I'm telling you man, they stink like boars They gotta be boars But Iron Town, okay I mean Lady Aboshi, she's kind of the coolest character Because she's villainous but not bad And she's like impressive and strong and fascinating But like you know, causing, you know

[00:55:10] She's complicated, like she's never a character like this In an animated movie that children could watch Everyone's looking out for themselves I'd be afraid of them Looking out for their people Yeah sure It's competitive time, it's a battle to stay alive Yeah

[00:55:23] I mean also people who are sort of on the outside Of you know, the culture that was growing In other more like established places Like lepers making firearms to help protect And maybe even grow Iron Town And you know prostitutes who were coming to do

[00:55:47] Everybody in the town was like effectively on equal footing They had women working in the forges Which probably wasn't happening anywhere else She was trying to create this perfect civilization Of complete equality and wild growth

[00:56:05] And the only way she can do it is that deep in the forest Or whatever, untouched from main line civilization And like does everything she does to Well supposedly does everything she does to Protect those people That's at least what she claims and says

[00:56:19] Whether or not she's like exploiting that idea I feel like the movie maybe doesn't touch of like You know, I am defended because I am making a community Of ostracized people and isn't that nice But really I just want you know

[00:56:34] I want to take over the world with my good hard weapons That are made of the hard stuff that we found in the sand That hard stuff is helpful Yeah That Iron Sand But that's the other big thing of just like At this point in time it's like

[00:56:47] What is the best strategy for staying alive Like everyone's trying to figure out like What's the best way to form a society So that we don't get killed by other people or boars This first scene where she takes Ashdokha on like a tour

[00:57:02] And shows him like how the town operates And how they are achieving this balance and this equality The thing that stuck out to me this time Is she like walks him up to her private chambers And walks him through this big ass garden that she has

[00:57:15] This big big big garden that she has in her front yard So like if you were ready to write her off as The person who just wants to obliterate nature for You know, for profit sake Like I think it kind of takes the legs out of that argument

[00:57:29] Because it's like you know It's not like she doesn't care completely But she wants to maybe Feel a little more control over nature You know Sure She pitches it as like they started it Yeah We need stuff and we got the stuff

[00:57:45] And then wolves and boars started to like Come and try and murder us And more people So that's not good I would not love it if there was a boar That was the size of a building That was trying to hurt me Sounded like a car sized boar

[00:57:57] I don't know How big are those boars? Huge They're car sized Big ol' boars Big ol' boars The leper scene I find very unnerving And touching Yes Like you know or like Yeah unnerving is good because it's Genuinely unsettling Or frightening or whatever To think about this

[00:58:16] Miyazaki apparently was like He is to this day moved by the plight of lepers In Japan Wow And he was like I wanted to Like deal with the incurable disease Quote unquote caused by bad karma Which is like You know an old outdated belief

[00:58:33] Is that still a serious issue in Japan? I don't know about serious But like it exists He can't get over it though Yeah The choice to animate the leper speaking Where their heads are completely covered in bandages Right

[00:58:47] But the mouth of the bandage sort of flaps a little bit Yeah You know So it's not just like some disembodied voice coming from under gauze It's like oh right there's like a person there Who's emoting whose face you're never gonna see Yeah it's frightening Yeah

[00:59:02] But also as Griffin is saying Like just immediately Like every Disney movie she would I don't know She'd do something Not Cruella De Vil Like she's not wearing the skin of the boar And like Dona looks so beautiful Right Because vanity is bad Anyway

[00:59:18] She would get to sing her one song about like By the way I'm evil Right It would be like That would be the name of the song Right Verse one By the way I'm evil Verse two I don't like grass and trees Right on and on Like that

[00:59:32] I eat squirrels whole Many driver also like sells it So She's like just cool as shit Like she sounds so cool And collected And seems like the perfect like representation of this person Who just like handles shit And has made something out of nothing

[00:59:50] This was the time when it felt like Many driver was gonna be like a major force She was like coming off an Oscar knot When this is coming out in America Right and this is one of those Romali my much younger sister

[01:00:03] Saw Goodwill Hunting for the first time A couple years ago And had that reaction she has sometimes How did she like those apples? She liked those apples She actually liked them apples a lot But she said to me She was like what happened to many driver Yeah

[01:00:17] Like when she sees a movie That's from before she was born Or when she was too young Right and what happened to this person There's someone giving that much of a movie star performance And she's like why has that person Not been a presence in my conscious life

[01:00:29] And I was like I don't know what to tell you Like it was she's one of those people Where it kind of feels like we did her dirty There was that weird fucking thing Where Damon dumped her on Oprah What? Do you remember this?

[01:00:41] Man for a blandly charming man Matt Damon is a lot of weird shit on TV He's got some baggage He because he and many driver were dating After Goodwill Hunting And everyone loved it Because it was like oh the people from the movie Found true love

[01:00:57] And then like a year after that I want to say He went on Oprah and he was like Oprah was like what about you and many And he was like yeah it's over between us And she's like that was the first I had heard of it

[01:01:09] That was news to me Yeah Sheesh Matt Matt Why is he always doing crazy things? I don't know But she this was like that moment Where it felt like she was going to be Like a major major presence But she is phenomenal at villains Yes

[01:01:29] And I do think she is good at finding The human core to negative characters Beyond the lights I was going to say I think it was one of my nominees that year She's fantastic in that She's on that show now I don't watch it She was speechless

[01:01:43] It just got cancelled Oh it just got cancelled out of there Yeah Well that's too bad People like that show right? She should have played Thanos I mean you're making this point You think she should play Thanos? No because you're saying that

[01:01:52] Interestingly she dated Josh Perlin for a while Did she really? Yeah I think they were engaged When was that? 2001 Weird before he marries Diane Lane? Uhhhhh Yes 2004 I'd have to ask Josh Yeah It takes a toll I don't know I can't do a Thanos It takes a toll

[01:02:14] It takes a toll This day carries a heavy toll That's what he said It takes a toll I don't know It's weird for a character so iconic There is no Thanos impression You know I'm going to bring me the sugar I'm going to bring me the sugar

[01:02:29] And put it in water Sugar water Sugar water When I snap my fingers I want sugar and water And Thanos I want to take the infinity stones And put it in water Gemstones and water Just for the listener Ben Checking his phone Weird What could be on there

[01:02:55] That's more interesting than this Ben is doing taxis Don't bring up taxes to me Okay I'm not stressed about taxes She's famous last words I shouldn't have said that Yeah, okay anyway I just love Iron Town It feels like a D&D I mean D&D podcast

[01:03:12] It feels like a great location Iron Town Yeah Like a cool city This is true of most of me as Aki's movies I feel this way Really strongly about Spirit or the Way About this idea that The worlds that these movies introduce

[01:03:28] Feel like they are going to go on After the credits end Yes Even when you stop watching it Like the world is The world is so There's so many crystallized facts About this world And there are so many systems And engines driving this world

[01:03:44] That you get the impression that This thing was going before the movie started And it will continue to go after the movie ends Well He's good at that Yeah And not to harp on the leper thing But talking about what would be different

[01:03:58] In a Disney version of this movie Probably wouldn't have any lepers You don't introduce an element like that If the hero isn't going to somehow Save, solve or cure them Yeah he finds like the leprosy leaf That they mash it into a paste And it cures them Right

[01:04:15] Clear their skin Like that's just an element you're introducing An exfoliation spirit You're like this is part of The tapestry of this city And here are people who live a very, very difficult life And then the movie goes on Right And when the movie ends

[01:04:31] You think about the fact that they are just still there Wrapped in bandages, building guns But then this is also a movie where you're like Okay, alright, Iron Town This is a lot to handle But I think I can like I'm beginning to grasp Yeah

[01:04:42] Like all the various moving parts in this movie And then like the big wolf shows up With a girl whose face is She's got a crazy mask And like blood on her face She's sucking blood out of the wolf's leg Yeah, and you're like okay, oh, okay

[01:04:53] So is this now? This is a whole other thing? And you're like that's Princess Mononoke And they're like no, Mononoke is kind of an idea Yeah She's got a different name But they also sort of call her Princess Mononoke But right

[01:05:05] That really just sort of means like spirit princess Yeah, it's like King of the Campus You know Right, her name is not Mononoke No, Sun Right, yes In another very dark element Her parents were frightened by this wolf And just threw her at the wolf

[01:05:26] Do you think that they had an issue with the wolf Being 12 feet tall? You think the size was the issue? It's a big wolf It's a big wolf Yeah, when a wolf that big challenges you You have no other option You have to eat your baby

[01:05:40] Right at the wolf Because the wolf already won The wolf is bigger So the baby has always belonged to the wolf Do you think it was the goal was Were they trying to distract the wolf By giving him the baby

[01:05:58] Or were they trying to use the baby as a projectile Where they're like maybe if we hit the wolf hard enough With the baby We'll knock him out I mean When my son was an infant Right, yes You throw your son at a wolf

[01:06:14] What was the first time you threw your son at a wolf? Right Are there any large creature that was maybe a god of some sort? I don't know if everyone listening to this Knows who I am So I'm going to go ahead and clarify that I've never thrown

[01:06:26] But I didn't It's your word against ours I have to imagine this is our house Our rules I have to imagine his ballistic properties Love something to be desired Really? Maybe it's a little squishy My parents threw me at a really aggressive looking Cockroach

[01:06:48] Well that would do it That would probably Did you squish it Or your bat's right off They raised me Now Griffin you have not met Ben So for context He was raised by roaches Yes And we genuinely have no idea whether that's true or not

[01:07:02] But this is a man I've known for almost a decade So you're really Your version of this is Joe's apartment then That's your princess model Yeah, that's your mid 90s MTV generation movie Right Ben's been living a pretty steady Joe's apartment life From childhood to present day

[01:07:20] Should we reboot Joe's apartment as Ben's apartment? Should that be on our blank check pictures? Yeah If I reboot you mean should we place cameras in Ben's apartment Should we just fill Ben? Sell attempt TV It's a reality show baby That's cheap production They love unscripted

[01:07:36] He's a roach boy so representation Right Not a lot of roach boys Not a ton of roaches on the TV Unless J. Roach has got a new political target You know what I'm saying? Well he does but it's a movie Yeah well that's just for TV

[01:07:51] Oh no he didn't do the TV one No he's doing the movie Roger Ailes Okay Griffin what do you think about the new popular Hollywood trend Of everyone making movies and TV shows about Roger Ailes Everyone's favorite character Fox deceased Fox News executive Uh, board Board Board

[01:08:09] You're bored of it? I'm bored of trying to think of an opinion Yeah About it I've been sitting here trying to think of an opinion And then I was, my mind was like Why don't you think about the very big meatballs That you have in your refrigerator instead

[01:08:23] So then I started thinking about those meatballs And I couldn't general, I apologize I couldn't pretend to uh, care No no apologies I've assumed, I have not seen the show But I assume that it is mostly like Roger Ailes walks into a room

[01:08:35] And they're like doing a presentation And he's like how about Evil-er And then the movie's gonna be the same thing What if we lied I thought it was like a TV channel where we do the news And he's like okay okay okay But what if it was Evil?

[01:08:50] And they were like great, we'll make millions That's the movie right? That's the whole movie Is there one makeup artist who is just making bank Who is the Dick Cheney movie And like anytime they need a very bad looking older gentleman He's the jowliest makeup guy out there

[01:09:06] He did Churchill too He did Darkest Hour He's all jolly up It's the same, Hollywood has one set Of prosthetic jowls That is just going around the, around the horn It just fills them with like yogurt or whatever And they like wobble around You know what's so funny?

[01:09:22] Uh, there are actors who look like that And seemingly every time someone makes a movie Or a show like this They're like no I gotta pick someone who looks really different Right because then it's more fun It's like wow But like Damien Lewis playing Toronto Mayor Doug Ford

[01:09:37] He's doing that? They did it! Oh Jesus They made a movie And you're like oh, notoriously svelte and handsome man Oh my god Yeah I'm looking at the pictures Okay It just feels like such a burden to give someone jowls When jowls occur in nature

[01:09:54] Some of these are fake Okay there we go That's, alright anyway I heard Christian Bale He just kind of puffed his cheeks up naturally It was all method Yeah yeah He's like a bullfrog He could just inflate The whole movie is him holding his breath

[01:10:08] That's why he says his lines really quickly I think we should be evil Don't worry I'll take care of most of the stuff Mr. President I'm gonna shoot my friend in the face Uh, Super Princess Bonanno, okay Yeah Uh, yeah so come on, San She attacks Iron Town

[01:10:24] Yes Uh, she has a big fight She's raised by wolves She and I are stuck in the non-knock each other out Yeah, she's raised by wolves Good, no allegiance to humans No, dislikes them actually quite a great deal Things are better If you interpret her And it's subtle

[01:10:38] Yeah, right You might miss that it takes a lot of interpretation But she will say something like I don't like humans at all Right, that was not fair I do not like them That was when I started to go like I feel like maybe what they're teeing up

[01:10:47] Is that she doesn't like humans She like wolves She like wolves Yeah, she likes wolves She does like wolves Barist I really like how ugly the fights are Yeah In this movie The first fight that you get with San And it is on this mountain side

[01:11:01] And they are going up this very narrow path And here she comes on a wolf's back With two wolves flanking Just like running down the mountain And instantly you're like This is gonna be really fucking bad All these guys have All these guys have ancient guns

[01:11:16] And they're on a very narrow path On a mountain side Like this is gonna suck For everyone involved And sure enough Like dudes go flying off the mountain Dudes get chomped to bits A wolf gets shot And goes flying off the mountain Like instantly it's so fast

[01:11:29] And ugly And not like this neat little choreographed ballet It's just what would happen If three big, big wolves fought A bunch of dudes with ancient rifles On the side of a mountain Yeah, they're inelegant In a way that's interesting Because the movie doesn't have these

[01:11:46] Like, oh, that's fucking awesome moments Yeah Like I think he doesn't want people To get off on the violence Right Even though every time someone shows up You're like Imagining the cheaper version of this movie Where San is like the cool hero And instead he's like She's frightening

[01:12:04] Like she is literally what someone raised by wolves would be like Like she is close to inhuman Yes And like, Ashitaka you want to be like Alright I'm with this guy Right, he's like the audience surrogate But he's like Well for one he has an evil arm

[01:12:18] But to me it's kind of dopey Yes I don't know He's genuinely baffled By most of the things going on Well it's because he doesn't understand why it can't be like how it is Right, where's the harmony guys? Where's that balance? Yeah, pretty soon after

[01:12:33] The like mountain side fight And after he meets everybody in town And sees San with her blood face Across the river She's got blood face She's got blood face It's big It's on the poster She's got a blood face Is when like the big fight in town happens

[01:12:50] And the whole time Ashitaka's like How can I make this whole stop It's like dude you've been in this town for like 15 minutes And instantly he's like Let me just get in here Hey this fight is bad And have you thought about not doing it?

[01:13:02] I feel like everybody in that entire sequence is like Dude We're into this fight We want to do it We like this fight This is it, we like this a lot We live for this fight He's trying to pass the the dentact He wants to make Crime illegal

[01:13:15] Crime illegal Much like Harvey Dent Do you know about the dentact Griffin? We've heard about it Where it makes crime you're not supposed to be In the Dark Knight Rises It's set after the heroic historic passage of the dentact Which made crime illegal

[01:13:29] Before that there had been crime in Gotham And what was Right But then Harvey Dent died and they were like Dentact We should name an act after him about now crime is bad Because people didn't like the crime but they were like

[01:13:41] Well what are you going to do about it Yeah it's legal So That man comes in but he can't do it all And the dentact gets passed Where's Falconi? Why? He robbed and bombed a bank Yeah but like That's fine That's his property

[01:13:57] I'm checking the books for like a dentact Nope nothing here Not a dentact dude Hey you're just beating up that scarecrow guy What did he do? He threw nightmare dust in people's faces That's fine Yeah that's okay We liked it We liked it Some people liked that

[01:14:15] We love having terrible nightmares The craziest thing is that Gotham had a police force They just didn't have anything to do They just sat around being like just like Dentact Are you going to do anything? Are you going to get on that? Nothing happened

[01:14:27] Every morning they take out their phone They check the weather and then they go Let's see if crime is Nope still legal Still legal Okay and then in Dark Knight Rises It is illegal and then Bane blows up a football field And they check Yeah

[01:14:40] And they're like dentact Not legal to blow up a football field Get him Fuck him back man What a great movie I mean that's why Bane's the greatest villain of all Right Right Because he's the one who dares to fight the Dentact Right

[01:14:54] The other guys they can claim ignorance Right Roush Al Ghul can be like I thought this was cool I thought everyone was going to like this Burn London to the ground What happens next? He takes San to the forest Oh there's a badass sword fight

[01:15:13] There is one badass sword fight Truly badass sword fight Which I believe was the reason I wanted to see this movie Because I saw like some trailer that had this sword fight And it looked really cool And also it's just a big Billy Carter fan Really? Was that?

[01:15:29] I don't think I was a big Billy Carter fan It is weird What are you going to say sorry San using this like you know just like dagger And just wild wolf like Just attacking every you know Quarter of a second versus a Boshi

[01:15:43] Just moving like smooth as shit Like always and blocking everything And then after that happens for a while Just like goes in and gut checks both of them Like oh fight over It is cool when he just like runs out of the village

[01:15:56] And they like shoot him and shit That whole sequence is so long He gets arm power it is very long And then but then takes her to the forest Who shows up Crazy forest antler Scary face spirit man Who also at night is a giant Yes

[01:16:14] All of the above Now no one in the movie says any of these things You just kind of have to put it together They kind of generally talk about the forest spirit Yeah but you could think that it was not A literal elk like being

[01:16:30] But when he shows up it is very much like Leans over to girlfriend like that's the forest spirit Also his feet I feel like the feet Stepping and then growing Pretty cool Pretty cool and that sort of gives me a sense That that's a nature

[01:16:44] Right this isn't just a regular animal Yeah Well and also his head looks delicious It does It looks like the kind of head you could eat And get immortality Yeah yeah I want to cut that head off The second he came on screen

[01:16:55] I went to Amazon and was like Do they have any forest spirit heads for it I was like I would love a forest spirit head Oh suvied that? Yeah Like 129 for two hours Checking fresh direct I was like does anyone Put it into Yelp

[01:17:10] That is fall off the bone immortality Yeah right it's like side effects You will live forever That's like it only Yeah really juicy Tends to you just as long as you don't over cook it It's really moist also you'll live forever You'll live forever Yeah

[01:17:24] Yeah look at that forest spirit he's cool I'm just looking at pictures with Ben right now There's big forest spirit Yeah That's the big boy The Night Walker I think is what he's called Right Yes Yeah he's cool

[01:17:36] So he shows up and his head is on his body For now Yeah he's got it He's got his own head Right Yeah He's a cool guy when he's got his head It's when he doesn't have it that he's a real He throws a real shit head

[01:17:49] He does turn into a bit of a stinky baby When he doesn't have his head That's true And overrides all of humanity Can you blame him I don't know Can you I think if someone chopped my head off I would just react by being dead

[01:18:01] And not doing anything That's true Yeah I think I'd be pretty chill If someone chopped my head off And we also meet the boars Right The boar, the crazy blind boar god Okoto Played by Keith David Played by Keith David in the dub

[01:18:16] Who is the greatest voice actor ever The greatest yes Yeah also one of the greatest Physical actors ever Just kind of one of the best actors He's an amazing actor I love him Yes I love him You know On the screen as well But he really is

[01:18:32] He's like the greatest voice actor of all time Yeah yeah I mean he's got one Like Mel Blanc The greatest voices in history Right My brother and I were talking about What is the best Keith David movie And we were like Is the question

[01:18:46] What's the best movie he's been in Or what's the best use of Keith David And then even when we tried to file it Under the ladder We were like Well but there's so many different ways You can use Keith David Right

[01:18:59] It's hard to come up with a binary Best use Yeah no I want as much Keith David Right In everything all the time He is in Armageddon with Billy Bob He is He's the cat and core line That's true He's Cameron Diaz's father And something about Mary

[01:19:15] If we're doing vocal performance Doctor Facilier And Princess and the Frog is like That is a phenomenal performance Probably it for me But if we're going best movie overall I don't think it's the best movie But the thing is one of my favorite movies That's the thing

[01:19:28] Like right you're like Maybe the best film he's been in That might be the best movie he's ever been in But he's not a star But he's not a star Right But then like something Like they live gives you a lot of Keith David

[01:19:38] But it's a more restrained Keith David Which is still a good flavor It's good But right but But then also like Isn't he like the voice of Ken Burns' Jazz Which is just like ten straight hours That Keith David talking to you about jazz

[01:19:52] I was not aware of this Is that true Yeah Yeah, narrator Keith David So you got jazz for ten hours? How many hours we got here We got ten episodes So Let me just Open up my eye cow And let me schedule for tonight I'm sorry it's 1140 minutes

[01:20:10] So you know Okay let me time that Do humans even live that long? Which is 19 hours So it's 19 hours of jazz talk from Keith Just give me one second Sorry guys Give me one second here My eye cow And I am scheduling One continuous 11 hour orgasm

[01:20:27] For later tonight There we go You guys want to come over And watch the Ken Burns Jazz with me If that's on the eye cow You can do that by yourself I'm good Really? Okay I'll have fun I'll go I'll go I like jazz

[01:20:42] You like the 19 hour PBS documentary about jazz Yeah yeah yeah It's my favorite That's your favorite So you usually are disappointed When you go to the movie theater That's your favorite genre Where you're like I've never seen a movie theater Right right right

[01:20:54] I have watched the 19 hour movie I have watched the 19 hour documentary about jazz Right Like someone like Hey you want to go see Spider-Man 2? Is it a 19 hour documentary about jazz? No it's like two hours It's like Spider-Man Battle of Doc-O-Cut

[01:21:08] Not even like a small part of it Like there's not just like A 19 hour section in the middle That's a documentary about jazz I almost got tricked into seeing whiplash Oh boy Luckily I sat down In a very comfortable seat In a big dark room

[01:21:21] And I had a big bowl of Popped corn And I was like wait a minute Wait a minute This is a movie I've seen movies on TV shows I need to get out of here Right you realize This isn't going to be 19 hours at all

[01:21:32] Thankfully just in time You realize that that was not Your tempo No It's not quite your tempo Oh boy What else is going on in Mononoke? The boars are going to fight Yeah we didn't really talk about the scene where he like Manages to rescue Son

[01:21:49] And get her out of She like invaded the village to kill him Yeah right right They fight He busts out He's like I'm taking Son out of here Y'all can let me do it or not Whatever And then somebody shoots him Right to give not a shot Right

[01:22:03] Yeah And he gets shot straight through His tum tum Lifts up this huge As Wooden Gate using his spaghetti powers And then Forest spirit saves him Right But doesn't take the curse away Which I think is a weird choice by the forest spirit Fixes the belly wound

[01:22:19] Leaves that nasty Nasty spaghetti mess on his arm Well has he really earned the right to have his curse taken away at this point You know there's a difference between like saving a guy's life And decursing him

[01:22:32] You could make a good case for that he had earned it By rescue it yes I think you could But I guess he hasn't learned his lesson yet Which is if you take the spirit Creatures head Then things go very bad

[01:22:45] That is the ultimate lesson in this movie Right You got to You gotta learn it It's a very simple sort of moralistic story It's like a just so story Right right don't take heads All children need to learn at a certain age

[01:22:56] That you should not decapitate a forest spirit Don't take anyone's head I think it's a good lesson for kids No I think this movie is going a little more It's fine grain Yeah No it's like isn't this movie kind of about like

[01:23:12] You know we were kind of a pain in the ass And then push shame to shove And we fucking took the fucking forest spirit's head And that was kind of a pivotal moment for us We put it back but it was kind of too late

[01:23:22] Yeah now nature knows Yeah We violated something completely sacrosanct Right Everything worked out fine But if you look at the hey nature Scoreboard Right What's up Just so you know It's kind of you can undo it You can put the head back But you can't really

[01:23:38] Nature now knows how we behave when the chips are down And it's not a pretty look That's why this movie is not My favorite movie is Aki because it is so intense And so naughty That I really want to like Knotty It's an intense Knotty Yeah

[01:23:55] That I really want to put it on to right Right Right Just so I have fun But I love that like You know even a scary boar god Who's all fucked up We did this to him Like you know what I mean

[01:24:07] Even though he's sort of like a quasi villain In the third act there Like he's This is like a human sickness That's been visited out of him And it's so great Like that scene I think it's soon after like The boar clan trying to Attack the iron town

[01:24:21] Forces and just getting fucked up And even like the wolf clan was like Hey don't do it You're gonna be absolutely just destroyed And they go ahead with it And in the last time you saw a koto He was like presented as this wise Yes, keep it

[01:24:36] Like yeah like this wise patriarch Of this clan Who when he finds out that Ashitaka killed his buddy This god He was like Wow thank you for doing that If I see you again I am gonna have to kill you

[01:24:50] Like he presents it in like this very wise way And then the next time you see him Is everybody in this clan just got killed He's got some of this like spaghetti stuff He's like corrupted by The forces of just not wanting to be dead Yeah

[01:25:05] And then you see like Oh maybe he's not this like Untouchable wise Cause now he's just like Afraid and will believe That anything just will believe anything If it means he gets to stay alive Right And it's such a brilliant like switch

[01:25:20] Where you're like the first time you see him Oh this guy's great What a wise kid This is the Wizard of Oz Who's coming to save Save that and then it's like No no no don't kill me I'm gonna charge I'm gonna kill everything It's interesting

[01:25:30] Everyone's just trying to survive And it brings it back to that first wormy boar First spaghetti boar Yeah Like how that right could have happened Yeah That corrupts us all Did we forget anything This is another reason why this is not my favorite

[01:25:45] Is I feel like the movie kind of drags a little bit At this part Like right after you get all the good Saan Ashitaka like hanging out with the wolves Then like Then a bunch of stuff happens Yeah I am not

[01:25:56] The show down at the end is busy This is easily his longest movie I think Yeah this is 215 Yeah Which most of his movies are like pretty Pretty tight 90s They're starting to get longer though Cause like Spirit of the Ways Like a good two hours Yeah

[01:26:10] Wind Rises is like two hours Howls is like two hours You know at this point Tony was a 19 hour documentary about jazz At this point he's sort of like Okay You know like I'm the master of Japanese entertainment For the last 50 years

[01:26:22] I can maybe take two hours to tell my stories Sure Oh yeah We did jump over the scene where Moro Has a conversation with Ashitaka After he like wakes up in their den And goes outside in its nighttime And it's just him and this giant wolf goddess

[01:26:36] And she's like hey You should just like jump off this mountain She's like so great Like San is like Well the four spirit likes him So I'm sure he's okay And San is like Hey Moro's like Hey why don't you come over here

[01:26:50] I'll bite your whole head off And eat you I know that you're trying really hard to stay alive But I just want to just like Crazy pitch My mouth is very big And it has a lot of teeth It's so big And you love my daughter

[01:27:02] I think she's into you But I just want to come and eat half your body What if you just die so hard Like the hardest anyone has ever died Yeah have you ever done it Can you say empirically that you know you don't like it

[01:27:15] Maybe just die a little bit But you can't put the you know Toothpaste back in the tube When you die That's what this movie is about Just in general Like we already Even though you have this big epic battle of good versus evil

[01:27:27] And you have these like heroes that you're rooting for Like it's not at the end of the day Like everything is fine So you're saying I should stop recycling You're right exactly No no no it's more just sort of like Yes the forest is still here

[01:27:40] And we can try and live in harmony with it But it is going to be like Very difficult battle It's what Griffin said The scoreboard's already up They've taken note Like however this ends This battle The war has like will linger Yeah It's

[01:27:57] It is why I think this is the best of the eco adventures Is like it's It is a The point of the movie at the end of it Is not this like Bald face like We are bad to nature And we need to start being better about it

[01:28:13] Yeah It is about traditionally The only way this has worked Is when there has been some sort of Give and sustainable give and take with nature Right It's not like It's not this like Annihilate Like humanity's Desire to Grow and

[01:28:33] Take what it needs to a piece of self It's like Yeah you're going to take what you need sometimes It's all about like figuring out a way that Is somewhat sustainable It's not like Whoa go nature Go nature You're so great

[01:28:45] Because in this one the nature also is a villain sometimes Right It's terrifying and uncontrollable Right That's the crazy thing Because in most those sort of eco adventure movies It's like There's a group of people who are like I don't know I think nature's bad

[01:28:59] And then the heroes are like No we like it And nature is impartial We're sure Right They're just sort of fighting for or against the idea of the thing And in this movie it's like No nature has a competitive relationship with us

[01:29:12] Like nature prioritizes its own needs above Our continued existence Right and our existence is The more of us there are Is going to be a problem And we're bad Humans are bad We're not great We're not great Yeah Humans But so are boars Oh yeah the apes

[01:29:29] We didn't talk about them They're like guerrilla gods Who look like they're made of mounds of clay Yeah With glowing eyes Yeah And they Much like me Understand that everything's bad Everyone's the worst Right Yeah Yeah they're kind of you Yeah I forgot about They're very like

[01:29:50] Look there's Come on this sucks Right they're just like Trump is president Yeah this is just a problem I'm not going to be in a good mood ever again This is when the sort of Akira stuff starts happening Which is like secretly like That's my That's your fam

[01:30:05] Like big wild body horror Like the end of Akira is like I am like glued to the screen At the end of that movie Because it is visually just The wildest shit ever That's like Lovecraftian Where it's like trying to represent something That you cannot understand Right

[01:30:22] And everything like From son getting like swept up In the big boar's evil spaghetti That is just like Like shooting through her hands It's like horrifying Yeah And Ashutosh was just like Jumping into the spaghetti And then of course The climax of the movie

[01:30:41] Like everything gets so fucked up At this part of the movie Even more so than it has been In the rest of it Yeah it's like the end of Annihilation It's just like they become like Consumed by like these forces Yes Also very Lovecraftian Yes

[01:30:56] But it is that body horror thing But extended to like nature It's like body horror for the planet we live on Planet horror? Planet horror Yeah planet horror Why not? Why not planet horror? Hexas That's his name And then of course As we all know this movie

[01:31:16] Ends with all of them dabbing And how you like me now plays Right That was how it went It wasn't something to do with the forest monster Or whatever No I'm pretty sure Forest spirit They do the doggy Right they do the doggy They dance to the Macarena

[01:31:31] Right Someone teaches them how to doggy Well his memory serves Yes Lady Aboshi shoots the forest spirit's head And it falls to the ground And then everybody starts doing the doggy Because they're happy Because nobody liked the forest spirit actually Right and that's

[01:31:47] Because he was weird and he had a face Like a person But he had the body of a deer So when the face part was removed Everyone was psyched And that's the kind of integrity that Miyazaki has Because no Hollywood film Especially an animated film with End

[01:31:59] With the characters learning how to doggy It is I don't know They teach him how to doggy They teach him how to doggy I just Even though you know how bad it You know that it is a bad idea to cut that head off

[01:32:17] But I love how bad it is right away Yes It's so bad right away And again the first time I saw it I'm curious if Griffin had this reaction I felt like the climax had happened Son had been sucked up into this noodle beast

[01:32:32] And Ashitaka jumps in trying to save him And then Moro the wolf mother comes And sacrifices herself To save both of them While all of Iron Town watches Aboshi had already shot the forest creature And did nothing It felt like somebody was over Yeah So they save them

[01:32:52] Okoto and Moro die And the forest walker starts to You know walk back into The tree line To disappear And stay this weird ephemeral And then nope It's shot right in the neck The worst possible thing happens And then it turns into a Living fucking nightmare

[01:33:12] Where you're like oh my god I did not think this movie was going to get This bad, this dark But even though it's scary also You've got Billy Bob being like I should take the head right? The head is kind of a No one else can take it

[01:33:27] It's like the fucking thing We need to get that The head's the thing You also get the most upsetting visual In this movie which is saying something Which is Moro's decapitated head Like chomping its way across the ground And just biting Lady Aboshi's arm

[01:33:42] Clean off in one go It is so wide That's a good call A lot of you know loss of Limand head It would be like if at the end Of the new Lion King remake Scar came up and just like Chomped off one of Nala's arms

[01:33:57] One of Nala's legs at the end It is so messed up The Lion King remake should have had this Embodied Scar head Yeah Like when you thought the movie was Going to end and you were like They haven't really done anything Different from the narrative of the original

[01:34:10] They're like now there's an extra 30 minutes Where his head chases people around And you're like I feel like we've teased that bad things Happened a lot when you cut off the forest Creature's head Hell it's the whole point of the movie

[01:34:25] It's the whole thing Miyazaki is trying to say But I don't think we've actually said what happens Crazy goo? I mean I mentioned goo It turns out it's like giant like amoeba Kind of thing It's like sparkly amoeba It's like venom Oh it is kind of like venom

[01:34:39] She is venom Yeah right If you maybe be the forest spirit It's been venom all along This is the venom prequel Yes Not um Life Yeah I had to think about what the movie people thought Was a venom prequel Right Um No it's bad It's bad goo

[01:34:55] This is bad goo folks It's really bad goo And like It's not good goo No It kills everything it touches It's pretty crummy goo I think it's bad It does kill everything it touches Which is one thing against it Um It cannot be reversed No

[01:35:08] You get a really great exchange Between Ashitaka and This like guard Like Lady Aboshi's body guard Who has been just kind of a dick the entire movie This big you know built dude Wearing this heavy armor And the goo is like spreading all around them

[01:35:23] By this side of this lake And Ashitaka jumps in And the card is like I can't swim And Ashitaka is like Well across the bottom It's the best And then you see him actually doing it I've always like I've always really enjoyed that Because Ashitaka gets like

[01:35:37] Weirdly sassy In the middle of the apocalypse Yeah Yeah it's pretty rad The whole thing's rad It's scary I don't like it But I mean to your point Like the fact that it feels like The movie has hit It's like Danny Monk Before shit hits the fan Right

[01:35:53] By the time Right Before goo hits the fan By the time Like all hell is on lease You're just like Oh there's no possible happy ending For this movie Right Like this movie can end With like a temporary reprieve Right the best thing you can get

[01:36:07] Is sort of like We stopped the worst Thing from happening And we now have learned a valuable And frightening lesson Yes About messing with nature Yeah And forest spirits No good very bad don't do it No good very bad don't do it I actually feel like this movie

[01:36:23] Has a surprisingly Calm Uplifting Uplifting ending Ending right Because they managed to get the head Back to the beast And it I guess it peacefully ascends Into heaven It does die though It does die It does die Yeah and so now It's just a regular forest

[01:36:39] And the stakes for the nature side Which is just like If this happens then this is just a regular forest Not a like magic godhood forest Right then the forest can't fight back anymore Now humanity can just kind of Slowly chip away at it

[01:36:51] But the wounds are gonna linger Yeah Right And at the end Like son's like I'm gonna go to the forest and protect it And Ashutaka's like Okay I guess I'll go help with iron town And lady of us she's like

[01:37:03] We're gonna make a better iron town this time A less bad mean iron town And the whole thing is just like Hey All these kids are gonna be alright Right Two and a half minutes ago you were like This is fucking third impact

[01:37:15] Like they are all about to be turned into goo It's like This is it this is it What a wild ending to this And then it ends with like Yeah you know your 20s are weird for everybody You gotta find your way They all

[01:37:28] You know some of them had to lose limbs And they all had to witness The almost end of the world But yeah then they figured out They should be nicer to trees I'ma make a new better iron town I think the like The kind of like a

[01:37:41] Top spinning at the end of Of inception that happens During this whole like Apocalypse sequence where the goo is killing everything All the Kadama are falling from the trees Like I mentioned earlier Like all of them dozens just falling down Headfirst dead dead dead

[01:37:56] And then at the end of the movie You see a little one of them Just like pop up out of the forest Just like one little Kadama pop up And it's like I get it But also it's still kind of scary So I would be dope

[01:38:07] Like it would be dope if the forest did not have these little Death totems You want them out of there Too much Like when you buy a new house You hire like some kind of ghost bussier To go around and like banish those guys

[01:38:19] Suck all those guys right up Now if I'd see my boy Totoro Like walk around on the background He's cool He's cool he can stay Cat bus can stay Cat bus can stay Right you would trust Totoro as a Kadama Like Chaperone

[01:38:31] If you're like if they're under his watch Right he seems pretty benevolent Ah you're with Totoro That's fine come on in What happens if you chop his head off though Totoro's head He just turned into living flame Like what's the yeah What's the result

[01:38:45] I think our flesh would sear off the bone Right exactly The very cinema like explodes Yeah Um yeah Well this is like the first kind of like Proper box office game we can do We're gonna play the box office game now Griffin you'll Griffin's gonna try and

[01:39:03] How do you say this Mr. Newman is gonna try and guess The top five films of the weekend That this movie came out in America now This movie came out on the ice cream I don't know if you're aware of this David

[01:39:16] I believe you guys played a round of this On the bandam recently right That's right no I am aware The release of major league or major league 2 This was a long time This was many episodes ago Yes By like to survive The level of output we have

[01:39:32] You block everything out You have I believe played some Some version of the box office game Griffin This is right We've done a box office game right around here Not this one though Okay and in 97 Yeah it's October 29th 1999 It's 99 This is America This is America

[01:39:52] Came out in Japan in 97 Makes it to America two years later So this is 1990 20 years ago This is the year that defined cinema history October 99 okay And number one is one of the great movies Of 1999 It's a horror remake about a house It's the house on haunted hill

[01:40:13] That was number one Number one opening weekend 15 million, Tay digs Yeah Allie Larder Chris Cattain was the box office guarantee At that point That movie made 40 million dollars House on haunted hill And coming out like five months after the haunting Yes same year as the haunting

[01:40:32] Like it felt like kinda like second hand goods After the haunting and it still did fairly well Incredibly long tagline What's the tagline? Six strangers have to chance to make one million dollars each All they have to do is make it through the night alive

[01:40:47] It's very long tagline That is a lot But now you get it right They could make a million dollars Yeah I know exactly what it's about Do any of them make it? I've never seen it Number two I believe also has Tay digs

[01:40:58] So Tay digs I think had Yes he had the number one and two movies this week Is it The Best Man? Yes it's The Best Man Tay's on top Coming of age drama The Best Man About like what if one of your friends got married Yeah

[01:41:11] Tay you imagine I've seen The Best Man that's the plot right It's like They're getting married Wow We've all dated each other Yeah Yeah so dig this digs was on top Digs was on top Yeah he dug his way to the top America dug digs

[01:41:29] At this point in time America dug digs We're into it And then the third is a movie We've definitely discussed this before It's a crime thriller One of those you know young lady old man Crime thriller Is it The Bone Collector? It's not The Bone Collector Fuck

[01:41:44] We definitely have discussed a weekend very close to this We have I think the next or the one right after Yeah Is this like when the insider came out or something The insider is probably like Okay this is another it's an old man young lady

[01:41:56] Old man young lady crime R rated thriller Yes the next weekend is the insider Interesting okay are either of them cops I think he's a cop You think he's a cop and she's not She's a prisoner She's a prisoner? Oh boy Is it Double Jeopardy? Bingo double Jeopardy

[01:42:16] Tommy Lee Jones and Ashley Judd Tommy Lee Jones is a cop right? Can I play should I have said that? He's a parole officer So sort of like cop adjacent Interesting Double Jeopardy Yeah Sometimes murder is legal

[01:42:30] Yeah do you think Billy Bob was on the bench for that one? Murder isn't always a crime he wasn't No Tommy Lee Jones answered his phone Yeah exactly he picked up the phone Is it Double Jeopardy? I can't do him Yeah yeah he's impossible to do

[01:42:42] He shouldn't be he's got like a great text and accent I know parole nailed it That's true he did nail it Yeah Number four Number four David's thinking It was a big movie this year Genuinely a very big deal movie Now somewhat ridiculed I think

[01:42:57] For its sort of like Huge cultural impact at the time Not American Beauty It is American Beauty It is American Beauty American Beauty Was this like it had just come out? Seventh week This was at seventh week That movie came out September 15th

[01:43:11] And it just sort of like trundled along Like it just you know it like never left The top ten I thought it wasn't like a big It was 130 million dollars Now I know it's a huge hit Okay yeah I guess

[01:43:24] I guess if it's a huge hit it's gonna make lots of money No but that's the crazy thing is It was like a box off his head And it's like what's it about Ah this guy he's sick of being married

[01:43:34] And shit and wants to sleep with a teenager Right a sex criminal plays a man Who wants to fuck his daughter's friend And jerks off in the shower a bunch No that's the thing like best picture winners Don't do that well anymore

[01:43:48] No no they're not guaranteed to like clean up Occasionally something that already was a hit Will win best picture like the departed But something like American Beauty Which like made a bunch of money And then won best picture And then made even more money

[01:44:02] They just can't make any money They just brought it back and made more money People were like well we got us It's an American obligation It was an American movie It was an American movie American Beauty But even Green Book didn't do like that well here

[01:44:12] And then it crushed in China Did you know that? I did Every other country Other Griffin did you know that The Green Book was a colossal sensation in China No I did not know that It's always a shock to find out What the Chinese movie going audience

[01:44:30] They loved it They loved Green Book Give me that Green Book Green Book and Warcraft man That's all we need That's right Number five How much had American Beauty made at this point 54 Yeah so it's like So it's halfway into Not even Crazy Number five

[01:44:46] Is an inspirational true story movie It's inspirational true story movie Was this kind of like an Oscar play? Yes and it got one Oscar nomination Maybe two Acting Acting and I think a song Big Daddy Adam Sandler's Big Daddy That's an inspirational movie David

[01:45:07] Yeah very inspirational becomes the Biggest Daddy of the month Can I say something very embarrassing Jesus It's well established on this podcast I think it actually is and I almost never talk about it I love Guns N' Roses Maybe you have talked about it

[01:45:21] Sure but it's like one of the Like the biggest outliers in my personality Where people are like really And I'm like yeah they're my favorite band Right I for a very long time Thought that Sweet Child of Mine was an original composition Written and performed by

[01:45:38] Cheryl Crow for the film Big Daddy Oh did she like cover it for Big Daddy or something? Yeah I was like this song fucking rules Why isn't everyone jamming on this amazing song Were you already a Guns N' Roses? No then like three years later

[01:45:49] My cousin got me apothecary destruction For my birthday and I was like Wait they did a cover of a Cheryl Crow song And then I did the timeline stuff Jesus You're a weird guy You know when you said this was going to be embarrassing Yeah Bingo

[01:46:03] You had no idea I was like how is this not the biggest Song in America Everyone should be loving Sweet Child of Mine Now I want to hear I had no idea Cheryl Crow did it Anyway that's not this movie Okay To be clear I have a guess

[01:46:16] Go ahead And the guess is from the fact that you said Big Daddy by the way is 60th at the box office this week It made $30,000 One of the biggest movies of the year though Huge movie Huge movie My guess based off the fact that you said

[01:46:28] It was an acting nomination A song nomination is Music of the Heart Correct Directed by Wes Craven Wes Craven After making I don't know 18 horror movies It was like what if I made a movie about like A nice violin teacher in the Bronx So inspirational It's scary

[01:46:43] Uh yeah A friend of mine is in that movie A friend of mine is in that movie as well Who's your friend I don't want to talk about it off my Okay I went to high school with someone where That was her only acting job

[01:46:53] Is she one of the violinists She was I think she is Yeah Because the kids there are like five actors Playing each kid at different ages right Yeah I've never seen it But apparently they were in the music of the heart And I guess who your friend was

[01:47:05] Who was in music of the heart And you don't If I get it right you say yes No let's do it off my mind Is it Meryl Streep No Okay And it's 100% a shot it's gonna take Is it Angela Bassett Oh yeah Angela Bassett's in it Gloria Estefan

[01:47:20] I had no idea Right I think Gloria Estefan It's one of her rare acting roles You're right Okay can I guess Now we're playing the music of the heart game Can I guess who them Is the main guy Yeah Shoot It's like a romantic lead Sure

[01:47:37] I've never seen this movie Okay I'm going off of my memory of the VHS box Give it a shot Is it Aiden Quinn Wow He of the two different colored eyes He has two different colored eyes Yes it's a plot point in practical magic Never knew it

[01:47:50] Well this is a great way for this episode to end Kieran Culkin is in it Okay Uh Klaris Leachman I'm done That's it Music of the heart Yeah and the song was in sync This was that famous best song year Uh huh At the Oscars Bob Dylan

[01:48:09] No that's the following No that's the next year This is the year that Phil Collins wins for You'll Be In My Heart Right but you have like the South Park song And uh whatever You have Blame Canada Blame Canada You have Music of the Heart by In Sync

[01:48:19] You have When She Loved Me The Toys Very Song Randy Neumann Sir McLaughlin And you have Amy Mann Saved Me Right and then fuckin Phil Collins won For whatever Tarzan You'll be in my heart You'll be in my heart It's the number one best song Is it? Yeah

[01:48:36] I wish they nominated Trash in the Camp instead Is that a Tarzan song? So they were like Trash in the Camp We're into this like adult contemporary Is that like trap music? Oh I'm about to remind you It's Rosie O'Donnell based trap music Right Thank you

[01:48:52] I'm so glad you remember this I remember that when she arrives in the movie She says the fun has arrived She definitely does Yes I remember that But they offered her the role And she was like Great I get to sing one of those classic Disney songs

[01:49:05] And they're like No we're thinking of going in a little different direction In this one Sure It's just gonna be Phil Collins singing songs Over the soundtrack The characters don't sing And she was like I will only do it if I can sing

[01:49:17] So there's a scene where the monkeys Destroy the human camp And while it's happening Rosie O'Donnell scats And it's called Trash in the Camp Trash in the Camp And they didn't want to break the reality By making it a full musical

[01:49:31] So instead the animals make like percussive noises While breaking the humans' belongings And Rosie O'Donnell goes like Ski ba doo, pa ba dee, pa ba da ba da ba da ba ba And it goes on for five minutes In that film won an Academy Award

[01:49:43] The only thing I remember about that The only thing I know is that Chris Rock Was the first choice for that role For Turk? Yeah and they offered it to him And he was like No thank you So then they went to Rosie O'Donnell

[01:49:55] I remember he gave some interview He was like they wanted me to like play a monkey And I was like no that's okay I won't do that That's her Griffin thank you so much for being on the show Hey thanks for having me

[01:50:08] It was a lot of fun I'm glad I got a reason to watch this movie Again and it also has sent me down the path of Rewatching the entire film You're gonna love it I know Sorry I didn't mean to yell I guess I should give you

[01:50:20] The bones back right I mean we should swap back our bones Right let's do a bone swap Because I gotta go You know what What? It's my gift to you No They always say if you're a guest They call him the most generous to bring a guest

[01:50:32] Toast in the biz That's ours Giving you bones You know what An appreciation for the bones Let me just I believe he's giving you his eyes Here are my eyes Ah cool I'm gonna put them on the sides of my head Do it Give yourself some ear eyes

[01:50:49] Everyone wants eyes in the back of their head But what if you had them in the sides of your head I mean far more useful Way more useful It's like VR Or one on the top So I can look out for birds Yeah definitely The silent killers

[01:51:05] The silent killers One on top and one on my chin Falling from tall buildings Look out for air conditioners Or even that thing where like when you're walking around And you're like oh is it raining And then you realize this little drip trap From the air conditioner

[01:51:19] If you had the eye in the top You wouldn't have to look around to figure that out You'd know immediately The amount of time you're saving Is just incredible If there was a drone and you wanted to check it out

[01:51:28] You'd have a better chance of catching a good sight of it I love that drones exist And I feel like I don't get to see them enough In action Cause they're way above my head If frickin burglars or spies Repel down from the ceiling Spider-Man Who's a menace

[01:51:44] Spider-Man He's a menace You're talking about the wacky web crawler Yeah exactly he's a menace to the city You could see him Griffin thank you so much for doing our show And talking about the princess with us Yeah of course Does the title ever explain itself?

[01:52:02] It just means spirit princess Like in Japanese I think they say it at one point Yeah they say it She is like the princess of the forest Mononokehime It means like spirit slash monster princess Which is kind of broad I was doing some research on this movie

[01:52:20] And there's apparently a really in depth documentary About the making of Just This Which I would be curious to see Did you all see the You may be saving this for the end of your series The Miyazaki documentary Kingdom of Dreams and Madness

[01:52:35] I did not know there was a specific documentary about this one Yeah I found a couple clips of it on YouTube And it's really like gets really in there Just about like frame by frame animation And how they work CGI into it I watched like 10 minutes of it

[01:52:50] It was cool This box set that we all have is weird Because it scrubs off all of the special features In the individual movies There's like the bonus disc Which has the documentary on it But otherwise like when Disney did their separate releases

[01:53:05] And when G Kids has now done their separate releases They have individual features Freedom I don't know They're robbing us of context Hopefully it all gets figured out one day Gifting us more shelf space That's the trade off Thank you all very much for listening

[01:53:22] Please remember to rate, review and subscribe Really Griffin do you want to plug anything Wait I forgot You should plug your podcasts Yeah we do podcasts and all kinds of stuff Our family all works on junk together That is why our website is McRoy.Family

[01:53:35] So if you go there you'll find out All the stuff we do Just got a graphic novel If you would buy that that'd be cool Great book It's called The Adventure Zone Murder on the Rockport Limited And that's all my plug time folks Thank you

[01:53:50] Yeah you have a media empire Along with your family and people should Delve into it Yeah please Yeah I was saying to David Like there are people who I feel like Their media diet is 90% Things that your family consumes And that's how we like it

[01:54:07] If we could actually bump that number Up above from Nami Fuck is up with that 10% Fucking euphoria Well those scenes are up to no good Those scenes are up to no good Thank you all for listening Here's the real ending Thank you all for listening

[01:54:22] Please remember to subscribe Thanks to Andrew Goodow for our social media Thanks to Joe Bowen and Pat Rounds for our work Liam Montgomery for our theme song Go to Why is my brain shutting down? Blankystarrated.com for some real nerdy shit TeePublic for some real nerdy shirts

[01:54:37] Yes Blank Check, Patreon Going through those Marvel movies still We're probably up to I don't know Spider-Man Home is where the heart is At this point Black Panther I think Who cares Who cares Who cares End as always Fuck I feel like I had one like 20 minutes ago

[01:55:08] We're gonna sit in this for a second I wanna be Can we make this last two hours? We can make this last two hours Oh boy, okay Two people need to pee No I was thinking it wasn't the spaghetti thing The wolves

[01:55:24] It was a thing we had a lot of fun where There was something David is Messing up the trash in the camp Putting his phone back in the park Trash in the camps David is coiling up His AC adapter for his laptop He's brushing his hair

[01:55:42] He has now put his headphones back on I think he is filing a piece for the Atlantic It could happen And of course Something about the Warthogs And as always Warthogs Pumba Koonamatata That's very topical Bones Season 13 coming soon To fucking Queeby or whatever Boreanus He's back

[01:56:10] He's bonier than ever As always And as always Thank you for listening