The Downfall Of Anakin Skywalker - Revenge Of The Podcast

[00:00:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, let's just do this. We just have to rip this off like a band.

[00:00:25] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no way to do it.

[00:00:26] [SPEAKER_02]: We just have to fucking do this. I'm Griffin amp.

[00:00:29] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no way in. I'm David Simps.

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the first way in is we just say our names, okay?

[00:00:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Let's just take this one step at a time. I'm Griffin amp and you're David Simps.

[00:00:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah!

[00:00:37] [SPEAKER_02]: This is Griffin and Dave Presents.

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Revenge Of The Podcast.

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_02]: That's what this is.

[00:00:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:00:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay?

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Talking about revenge of the simps.

[00:00:43] [SPEAKER_01]: That's what this is.

[00:00:44] [SPEAKER_01]: The epic conclusion to the tragedy that began with the phantom menace.

[00:00:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Tragedy in every sense.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:00:54] [SPEAKER_02]: That's what we're fucking tackling today.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_02]: You know, we were trying to see how thin we can slice the bologna so we have enough stuff to cover for ten episodes.

[00:01:01] [SPEAKER_02]: I like thick bologna myself.

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_02]: You're talking about in a sandwich.

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_01]: This... yeah, go on.

[00:01:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, my metaphorical bologna, David.

[00:01:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Your taste aside.

[00:01:12] [SPEAKER_02]: This movie is bologna.

[00:01:13] [SPEAKER_02]: This movie is bologna. It's a bunch of bologna.

[00:01:17] [SPEAKER_02]: We are gonna have a guest today.

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_02]: He got sick.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Often we will present to the guest a couple options of like, oh here episode...

[00:01:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh sure, what do you want to talk about?

[00:01:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_02]: But since they cancel today, we just went let's just fucking tackle the big thing because there's an unavoidable thing in this movie that is essentially the main crux of the film.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Totally.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_01]: If not the entirety of the movie.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Right, and reveals the main crux of the entire series.

[00:01:38] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the thing.

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_02]: It totally recolors the last two movies in a way that is... I'm having a very hard time comprehending.

[00:01:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I guess so.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_02]: You could argue this entire movie is a twist.

[00:01:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_01]: It's not... yeah.

[00:01:53] [SPEAKER_01]: When you watch Phantom and Attack of the Clone, you could predict this.

[00:01:57] [SPEAKER_01]: You could.

[00:01:58] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, hindsight is 20-20.

[00:01:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, hindsight is 20-20 exactly.

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_02]: But before we get into this, little housekeeping.

[00:02:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, okay.

[00:02:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Housekeeping.

[00:02:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Just want to quickly remind everyone to please continue subscribing, rating, reviewing on iTunes.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Helps us.

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Helps UCB comedy in general.

[00:02:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Producer Ben Hosley, AKA producer Ben, AKA the Ben Dude.

[00:02:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Producer, AKA HelloFennell, AKA Mr. Positive, AKA the Hos.

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Sitting to my right.

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Hello, gentlemen.

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, Ben.

[00:02:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, fans.

[00:02:27] [SPEAKER_00]: Come on, guys.

[00:02:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Rate and review.

[00:02:29] [SPEAKER_02]: So easy.

[00:02:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Ben has done this amitzfa by allowing us to do this podcast.

[00:02:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Mm-hmm.

[00:02:34] [SPEAKER_02]: And we need to help line the coffers.

[00:02:37] [SPEAKER_02]: That's right.

[00:02:38] [SPEAKER_02]: Metaphorically, there's no money to be made.

[00:02:39] [SPEAKER_02]: But we're lining the metaphorical.

[00:02:40] [SPEAKER_02]: There's no money to be made?

[00:02:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I mean, what... you thought...

[00:02:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Hit stop.

[00:02:44] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm out of here.

[00:02:44] [SPEAKER_02]: You thought the checks were just eight months late?

[00:02:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Oh, that was just a classic Sims bit.

[00:02:51] [SPEAKER_02]: One of my patented Sims bits.

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I want to make it clear.

[00:02:53] [SPEAKER_02]: We don't do bits like that on the show.

[00:02:54] [SPEAKER_02]: We don't pretend that movies don't exist.

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_02]: This show doesn't like bits.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_02]: No.

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_02]: We don't pretend that we thought we were getting paid.

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_02]: This is serious talk.

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a serious show.

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I'm thinking about changing the genre from comedy to just, like, TV and movies.

[00:03:05] [SPEAKER_00]: It's like, this is a culture show.

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_02]: At very least, drama.

[00:03:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I think there's a drama section.

[00:03:09] [SPEAKER_02]: We're the nurse Jackie at podcasts.

[00:03:11] [SPEAKER_02]: We are.

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_02]: This fucking movie is a tragedy.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_01]: It's funny.

[00:03:16] [SPEAKER_02]: That's really funny.

[00:03:17] [SPEAKER_01]: All right.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Tragedy of revenge in the Sith.

[00:03:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Please, please... this is the point I want to make and it'll tie into everything.

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Please rate, review, subscribe, unless...

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_02]: your review is going to be negative.

[00:03:29] [SPEAKER_02]: They're going to give us low stars,

[00:03:30] [SPEAKER_02]: in which I'm going to restate because maybe you skipped over episode one of

[00:03:34] [SPEAKER_02]: The Rendered Podcast.

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_02]: You're jumping in today because you don't like hearing about the beginning of movies.

[00:03:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, how about this?

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_00]: You don't want to re...

[00:03:40] [SPEAKER_00]: You don't want to review the podcast.

[00:03:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Review the movie.

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_00]: And just put that up.

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Just put that up.

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Who cares?

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Who cares?

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_00]: If.

[00:03:46] [SPEAKER_00]: But you better give us five stars.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_02]: If you give us a bad review or anything less than five stars,

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_02]: you are a Sith Lord and I want to state this very clearly before we get into the meat of this episode

[00:03:56] [SPEAKER_02]: because if you are a Sith Lord...

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_02]: That is a bad thing to be.

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_02]: If you are a Sith Lord, stop listening now.

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_02]: I threw down the gauntlet last week.

[00:04:03] [SPEAKER_02]: You are not allowed to listen to this podcast.

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_02]: All right Griffin.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_02]: If you are a Sith Lord.

[00:04:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Let's move on.

[00:04:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Are all Sith Lords out?

[00:04:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Let's move on.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_01]: No bits.

[00:04:11] [SPEAKER_01]: No bits.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm serious.

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't want fucking Sith Lords listening to this episode.

[00:04:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Griffin, Griffin, let's get to the movie.

[00:04:16] [SPEAKER_01]: This is a serious episode.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_01]: All right, all right.

[00:04:18] [SPEAKER_01]: No more yelling about Sith Lords.

[00:04:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin turns out to be a Sith Lord.

[00:04:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, totally.

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:04:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Or a Sith apprentice.

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Potential Sith Lord.

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I mean this...

[00:04:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Guess who else turns out to be a Sith Lord?

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_01]: This blew my mind.

[00:04:31] [SPEAKER_01]: A Palpatine.

[00:04:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Supreme Chancellor Palpatine of the Galactic Republic.

[00:04:35] [SPEAKER_01]: He was a Sith Lord.

[00:04:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that missed it.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_01]: He had a lightsaber in his pocket the whole time.

[00:04:41] [SPEAKER_01]: The whole time.

[00:04:41] [SPEAKER_02]: He had a lightsaber in his pocket the whole time.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_02]: A arm sleeve.

[00:04:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Makes me think that the Senate building should have had a metal detector at least.

[00:04:47] [SPEAKER_00]: He's good at fighting too.

[00:04:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Chancellor Palpatine, who routinely met...

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_02]: He's Flubber.

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, he's a real Flubber.

[00:04:54] [SPEAKER_02]: Like everyone else in this fucking movie is Flubber.

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_01]: He's a Flubber fighter and a Flubber face.

[00:04:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes.

[00:04:59] [SPEAKER_01]: He's got a Flubber face in this movie.

[00:05:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine's a different episode.

[00:05:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Let's fucking focus on Anakin.

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Well they're all very linked though.

[00:05:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Because I mean you were talking beforehand just so you know briefly.

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Episode one.

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_01]: All kinds of plots.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_01]: All kinds of weird plots.

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Ensemble cast.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_01]: All centered around this planetary war.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_02]: You're showing us a galaxy.

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Boop boop boop boop boop.

[00:05:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Episode two, like we say.

[00:05:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Classic mystery slash love story.

[00:05:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Kind of a noir movie.

[00:05:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_01]: One branch solving the mystery.

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_01]: One branch falling in love.

[00:05:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Meet back up.

[00:05:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Epic gladiator battle clone war.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Episode three not really any plot.

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Right to it.

[00:05:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:05:36] [SPEAKER_01]: Episode three is...

[00:05:37] [SPEAKER_01]: You got 20 minutes of war and then you got...

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Then just like a button at the end.

[00:05:42] [SPEAKER_02]: This long dark button.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm glad that we had pre-assaulted the tradition of making our first episode of the game in

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_02]: the movie because the first time it's this movie are totally different than anything else

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_02]: that happens to them.

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_02]: It's almost like a mini movie.

[00:05:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes it is.

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean like essentially especially because it's setting up a little more Anakin stuff.

[00:05:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh he chopped off that guy's head.

[00:06:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_01]: What's up with Anakin?

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_02]: No I don't want to harp on this.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Uh oh.

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Better not be about Sith Lords.

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_02]: No although I mean who cares if I say something bad about Sith Lords because they're not listening

[00:06:13] [SPEAKER_02]: at this point.

[00:06:13] [SPEAKER_02]: What do you not want to harp on?

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_02]: First 20 minutes has some laugh.

[00:06:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah sure definitely I mean you know Sith Lords are our specialty.

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah and uh...

[00:06:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh I hate it when they do that.

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_02]: He says that I have a bad feeling about this when the wall is coming down.

[00:06:27] [SPEAKER_01]: There's some elevator hijinks up down you know.

[00:06:30] [SPEAKER_01]: Solid banter.

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_01]: There's some banter.

[00:06:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I think Grievous is kind of comical with the coughing and everything.

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I think coughing is funny.

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean you're alright and you're pushing it but okay.

[00:06:39] [SPEAKER_01]: It's definitely more lighthearted considering it's the centerpiece that is a huge galactic war.

[00:06:45] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm saying Phantom Mass has...

[00:06:47] [SPEAKER_02]: A lot of comedy.

[00:06:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Huge laughs.

[00:06:49] [SPEAKER_02]: A lot of laughs.

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Because you got George R. Wall to Wall right?

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_02]: Episode 2 is more serious but like Anakin, Padme are fucking joking around with each other,

[00:06:58] [SPEAKER_02]: defuse sexual tension.

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah but you're right.

[00:07:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Episode 2 is way less laugh heavy.

[00:07:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah but like okay we got like Dexter Jetsers a fun fucking scene, Elon Sly's Bagano is a fun scene.

[00:07:08] [SPEAKER_02]: There's fun stuff.

[00:07:10] [SPEAKER_01]: I refuse to lionize Episode 2 just because we watched Episode 3.

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Because I'll do it with Phantom but I won't do it with the Tacharic Lonesome.

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_02]: We said we recorded it right before we recorded it.

[00:07:19] [SPEAKER_02]: The definitive ranking of these three films is 1, 2, 3.

[00:07:22] [SPEAKER_01]: It's not a question but that doesn't mean Attack of the Clones deserves any credit.

[00:07:25] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know.

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_02]: I think I kind of love Attack of the Clones now.

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_02]: It's bad.

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_02]: We were saying I have never wanted to watch Phantom Menace more than I did rewatching Revenge of the Sith last night.

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Totally.

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Because now I realize, I guess Phantom Menace is a great movie?

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Anyway, I guess it's a masterpiece because we didn't appreciate it when we had it.

[00:07:45] [SPEAKER_00]: I loved it.

[00:07:46] [SPEAKER_00]: It was so good.

[00:07:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Ben's really mad at the Sith.

[00:07:49] [SPEAKER_00]: No no, it's great.

[00:07:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Like you know with boy bands like I like this movie like I like the bad boy in the boy band.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_00]: You know what I mean?

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Yep.

[00:07:56] [SPEAKER_02]: You love to hate it.

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:07:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:07:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:07:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Whereas like Phantom Menace is like the Brian LaTrell.

[00:08:02] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like you actually love it.

[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like the sweetie pie.

[00:08:04] [SPEAKER_03]: Mm-hmm.

[00:08:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Um, where was I going with this?

[00:08:08] [SPEAKER_02]: You didn't want to harp on something.

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_02]: This movie past the first 22 minutes is so devoid of humor.

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes, it is.

[00:08:14] [SPEAKER_01]: That is true.

[00:08:15] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't, I can't think of a single joke.

[00:08:16] [SPEAKER_02]: No, not a single joke and not a single funny character.

[00:08:18] [SPEAKER_02]: We got no funny characters.

[00:08:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Just give me a break with a funny character.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_02]: We've pre-established in the last two mini series my holy trinity of characters.

[00:08:26] [SPEAKER_02]: I couldn't give you three characters I like in this movie.

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, there's no one.

[00:08:27] [SPEAKER_01]: I was gonna say yeah do you have any favorite side characters?

[00:08:30] [SPEAKER_01]: No!

[00:08:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Who fucking, everyone sucks in this movie.

[00:08:32] [SPEAKER_01]: What about the lizard, the iguana that Obi-Wan rides around?

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, the dactyl.

[00:08:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I mean, I'm reticent.

[00:08:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, that is my favorite part of the movie and we'll devote an entire episode to that.

[00:08:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Wait, that's your favorite part of the movie?

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes it is.

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_02]: It's so bad.

[00:08:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes it is.

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god.

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I almost texted you when I was rewatching it.

[00:08:48] [SPEAKER_02]: You should have.

[00:08:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Why not?

[00:08:49] [SPEAKER_02]: For the 15 minutes, because I didn't want to say something I'd regret later.

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_02]: For the 15 minutes where Obi-Wan's riding the dactyl, I almost texted you and went,

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_02]: David what are you talking about?

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_02]: This movie is great.

[00:08:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh god, I hate that sequence mostly because it looks really bad.

[00:09:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Here's what I like about the dactyl sequence.

[00:09:03] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a giant iguana?

[00:09:04] [SPEAKER_01]: It's goofy.

[00:09:05] [SPEAKER_01]: It is more goofy than the rest.

[00:09:06] [SPEAKER_02]: It's so silly.

[00:09:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I just want this movie to be silly.

[00:09:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't want to be a fucking...

[00:09:12] [SPEAKER_01]: What about, alright well, you know what?

[00:09:14] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, I will say, yeah.

[00:09:17] [SPEAKER_01]: When Anakin ignited that lightsaber in the Jedi Council in front of those younglings.

[00:09:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay so let's do this quickly, right?

[00:09:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, episode one, introduce us to a small slave boy.

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_02]: He is very chipper.

[00:09:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Good with engineering.

[00:09:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Good with McKeens.

[00:09:35] [SPEAKER_02]: McKeens and Rubbits.

[00:09:36] [SPEAKER_02]: And Rubbits.

[00:09:36] [SPEAKER_02]: It's all about McKeens and Rubbits.

[00:09:39] [SPEAKER_02]: And he's very chipper and everyone goes, ooh you're angry.

[00:09:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, everyone's like watch out.

[00:09:45] [SPEAKER_02]: And he's like what?

[00:09:47] [SPEAKER_02]: And they're like a little fucking little prat, right?

[00:09:51] [SPEAKER_02]: They're playing both hands.

[00:09:53] [SPEAKER_02]: There's some hands that go, ooh this kid's bad news and also by the way, all the pressure on the world, you might be the chosen one.

[00:10:01] [SPEAKER_01]: And we tested your blood and it says you are.

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Right, so they go, conflict of interest, all signs point to you being the chosen one but we don't like you.

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, to end up also say goodbye to your mother.

[00:10:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, but he acts like a little boy.

[00:10:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Whether or not Jake Lloyd's performance is naturalistic enough to recall how a boy behaves in real life.

[00:10:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Within the realm of this movie, he is recognizable as how a boy would act at it.

[00:10:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Right?

[00:10:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Episode two, Anakin's a bummer.

[00:10:30] [SPEAKER_02]: But the way in which he's a bummer and once again is a bad performance but within the parameters of what the film establishes, this is how a fucking teenager acts.

[00:10:37] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a sullen, it acts out.

[00:10:39] [SPEAKER_01]: He's strong, he's moody.

[00:10:41] [SPEAKER_02]: He doesn't listen to authority.

[00:10:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Super hormonal.

[00:10:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Very hormonal.

[00:10:45] [SPEAKER_01]: He's very upset about his mother getting raped and murdered by Tuscan Raiders.

[00:10:50] [SPEAKER_01]: As we all are as teenagers.

[00:10:52] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just a classic, it's a tale as old as time.

[00:10:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Your mother gets kidnapped by sand people.

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just, yeah, it's old school.

[00:10:58] [SPEAKER_02]: This is what happens.

[00:10:59] [SPEAKER_02]: I hate talking about these movies.

[00:11:01] [SPEAKER_02]: My point is, the first two films Anakin behaves in ways that are generally recognizable as how people would act at those ages.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, sure.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay?

[00:11:11] [SPEAKER_02]: There's a clear characterization of just Anakin is growing up, he is the chosen one.

[00:11:15] [SPEAKER_02]: The brief dalliance with murder that he has where he kills all the sand people.

[00:11:21] [SPEAKER_02]: It's such a clear act of revenge.

[00:11:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, it is.

[00:11:24] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, from-

[00:11:25] [SPEAKER_01]: No, what were you gonna say?

[00:11:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Well, it's obviously now that we've seen episode three planted there to suggest some sort of inner rage.

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_01]: But I would say it is done so amfistedly.

[00:11:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, I think like you can look at Attack of the Clones and be like, okay, in the classic hero's journey, this is almost like the refusal of the call.

[00:11:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:11:44] [SPEAKER_02]: You know, this is like the crisis of faith moment.

[00:11:46] [SPEAKER_01]: He can't maintain his sort of stability that is demanded of him.

[00:11:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:11:50] [SPEAKER_01]: And nor when we sympathize with that.

[00:11:52] [SPEAKER_02]: And in a way, you know, our failures make us better people.

[00:11:56] [SPEAKER_02]: You know?

[00:11:57] [SPEAKER_02]: It could be his bottom.

[00:11:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:11:59] [SPEAKER_02]: For him to rise up from.

[00:12:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:12:01] [SPEAKER_01]: You know, like a Lazarus pit.

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.

[00:12:04] [SPEAKER_01]: And at the beginning of Revenge of the Sith, there's some indication like, hey, he's matured into a bit more of a cool-headed Jedi.

[00:12:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:12:12] [SPEAKER_01]: You know, he's hitting that center eye on the Buzz droids.

[00:12:16] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't know what he's doing.

[00:12:17] [SPEAKER_02]: He's getting 500 points for Buzz droids.

[00:12:19] [SPEAKER_01]: He's, he seems, and he chops off Dooku's head, sure.

[00:12:24] [SPEAKER_01]: But he regrets it.

[00:12:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:12:26] [SPEAKER_01]: He thinks it's a bad idea.

[00:12:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Immediately.

[00:12:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, pretty much immediately.

[00:12:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, shouldn't have done that.

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:12:30] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.

[00:12:31] [SPEAKER_02]: That was a bad idea.

[00:12:32] [SPEAKER_02]: But Anakin and Obi-Wan are like joking.

[00:12:35] [SPEAKER_02]: They're at even level.

[00:12:36] [SPEAKER_02]: It's not like, oh, Anakin, how dare you?

[00:12:38] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like, huh, you sure killed those Buzz droids?

[00:12:40] [SPEAKER_02]: And he doesn't seem out of control.

[00:12:42] [SPEAKER_02]: No, he doesn't.

[00:12:43] [SPEAKER_02]: In fact, he seems more in control.

[00:12:45] [SPEAKER_02]: In control.

[00:12:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:12:46] [SPEAKER_02]: In Christensen's performance is, I would argue, so laconic in this movie that he, by emoting

[00:12:53] [SPEAKER_02]: so little seems to be the most controlled human being in the world.

[00:12:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Sure.

[00:12:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Especially opposite the, you know, even McGregor who has fallen into the river of Ham.

[00:13:06] [SPEAKER_02]: He's bathing in the river.

[00:13:07] [SPEAKER_01]: No, he fell it head first and he can't get out.

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_01]: I sent you that quote I love, right?

[00:13:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Which one?

[00:13:13] [SPEAKER_01]: You mean Kenneth Ranna, the river of Ham?

[00:13:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:13:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:13:17] [SPEAKER_01]: He said to Ray Stevenson, right?

[00:13:18] [SPEAKER_01]: On the set of Thor.

[00:13:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:13:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Ray Stevenson said I'm worried about dipping my toe into the river of Ham and he went,

[00:13:24] [SPEAKER_02]: no, bathe in the river of Ham.

[00:13:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Bathe in the river of Ham.

[00:13:27] [SPEAKER_02]: I've bathed in that river many times.

[00:13:29] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a great river.

[00:13:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:13:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I love Kenneth Ranna.

[00:13:32] [SPEAKER_01]: I want to say this and I think he gave one of the most underrated like cheesy villain

[00:13:37] [SPEAKER_01]: performances the last 10 years in Jack Ryan's Shadow Recruit.

[00:13:40] [SPEAKER_02]: I know you love that performance but you also-

[00:13:42] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a terrible movie.

[00:13:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:13:43] [SPEAKER_01]: That movie ends with him diffusing a small bomb in like Battery Park City.

[00:13:46] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like the lamest movie.

[00:13:48] [SPEAKER_02]: But your defense of that performance, I'm not saying it needs to be defended but your argument

[00:13:53] [SPEAKER_02]: for why that performance is so great and I'm quoting you almost directly here.

[00:13:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Please.

[00:13:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Is that we're watching Kenneth Ranna just sort of slice after slice of fine honey baked

[00:14:02] [SPEAKER_02]: ham.

[00:14:03] [SPEAKER_02]: Honey baked Virginia ham.

[00:14:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Honey baked Virginia ham.

[00:14:05] [SPEAKER_02]: I believe that's what you tried it.

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it probably is.

[00:14:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Did you not?

[00:14:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Slice after slice of fine honey baked ham.

[00:14:10] [SPEAKER_01]: That movie is so cataclysmically boring.

[00:14:14] [SPEAKER_01]: He said sweet ham, right?

[00:14:15] [SPEAKER_01]: And then he shows up, he directed the damn movie and obviously just gave himself the good role

[00:14:19] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's like swillin' wine and going,

[00:14:21] [SPEAKER_01]: I regret what we do mama, but you know,

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_02]: I could use more fucking ham in this movie.

[00:14:28] [SPEAKER_02]: There's some-

[00:14:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I could use more.

[00:14:31] [SPEAKER_01]: There's a slice of ham with the name Ian McDermott on it.

[00:14:35] [SPEAKER_01]: Well, he's all fucking ham sandwich.

[00:14:37] [SPEAKER_01]: And there's a side of ham salad, which is Obi-Wan Kenobi.

[00:14:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, but you know, ham salad's the right analogy because it's also,

[00:14:44] [SPEAKER_02]: the ham is cut with really boring lettuce.

[00:14:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure.

[00:14:47] [SPEAKER_02]: You know?

[00:14:47] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like ham on top of just like the watercrisp lettuce.

[00:14:52] [SPEAKER_01]: There's like beef Wellington, you know, like tough,

[00:14:55] [SPEAKER_01]: like overcooked beef Wellington and that is like-

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Smiths?

[00:14:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh, yeah.

[00:14:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Smiths!

[00:15:00] [SPEAKER_01]: They were Christmasmits.

[00:15:02] [SPEAKER_01]: We thought Smiths was gonna have so much to do this.

[00:15:04] [SPEAKER_01]: There's like a fourth build in this movie.

[00:15:05] [SPEAKER_01]: That is crazy.

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, okay.

[00:15:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Back on track, Hayden Christensen,

[00:15:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Hayden Christensen is so laconic that the guy seems

[00:15:13] [SPEAKER_02]: totally in control, right?

[00:15:15] [SPEAKER_02]: He has-

[00:15:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Even when he chops off someone's head, he seems pretty in control.

[00:15:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, but that definitely seems like the film's starting to tip its hand.

[00:15:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure.

[00:15:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Showing that the killing of the Tuscan Raiders was not a one-off,

[00:15:25] [SPEAKER_02]: right?

[00:15:26] [SPEAKER_02]: That if pushed,

[00:15:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:15:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin can kill very quickly.

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_02]: And also-

[00:15:30] [SPEAKER_01]: If given a reason, if given encouragement,

[00:15:31] [SPEAKER_01]: he'll jump to death.

[00:15:32] [SPEAKER_01]: That he's never found the apparent sort of calm,

[00:15:37] [SPEAKER_01]: you know, pope-like centeredness that every other Jedi seems to have.

[00:15:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Every other Jedi is told something like basically like

[00:15:44] [SPEAKER_01]: the Siths are controlling every aspect of society

[00:15:47] [SPEAKER_01]: and pulling all the strings,

[00:15:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and they react as if they've been told like,

[00:15:51] [SPEAKER_01]: you know, we're out of tuna salad today.

[00:15:53] [SPEAKER_02]: Despite what he says to many people,

[00:15:56] [SPEAKER_02]: including his wife,

[00:15:58] [SPEAKER_02]: married life seems to have given him no happiness.

[00:16:01] [SPEAKER_02]: No, it's true.

[00:16:01] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, there's the scene where they see each other

[00:16:04] [SPEAKER_02]: like for the first time since he got back to the phone wars.

[00:16:07] [SPEAKER_02]: At the pillar city?

[00:16:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:16:09] [SPEAKER_01]: At this set that we keep returning to that's just 80,

[00:16:12] [SPEAKER_01]: it's just an auto-population of pillars.

[00:16:14] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just rented to pillars.

[00:16:15] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just pillars, pillar, pillar, pillar.

[00:16:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, well, they did copy-paste.

[00:16:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean, it really looks like someone took Sim City

[00:16:20] [SPEAKER_01]: and just was like, drop a pillar every five years.

[00:16:22] [SPEAKER_02]: There's a lot of copy-pasting in this movie.

[00:16:24] [SPEAKER_02]: A lot.

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, they meet by some pillars.

[00:16:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and he's just like,

[00:16:28] [SPEAKER_02]: oh, Batman, I miss you so much.

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you're doing?

[00:16:30] [SPEAKER_02]: I was at the war.

[00:16:31] [SPEAKER_02]: The last movie was about you fucking fighting

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_02]: to be with this woman.

[00:16:35] [SPEAKER_02]: It's been three years or so.

[00:16:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Against all odds, against all judgments.

[00:16:39] [SPEAKER_02]: You're laying low.

[00:16:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Like, you've sacrificed so much to be with her.

[00:16:42] [SPEAKER_02]: You should fucking be still head over heels in love

[00:16:45] [SPEAKER_02]: with her, or the fact that you're falling out of love

[00:16:47] [SPEAKER_02]: should be the point instead.

[00:16:49] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just like, oh, he's just a boring couple.

[00:16:51] [SPEAKER_01]: And what news does she give him?

[00:16:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Right after the first 22 minutes,

[00:16:54] [SPEAKER_01]: she's got some news.

[00:16:55] [SPEAKER_01]: She's pregnant.

[00:16:56] [SPEAKER_02]: She's pregnant, but I think this is a different episode.

[00:16:58] [SPEAKER_02]: I want to stay on Anakin, okay?

[00:16:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Just his emotional journey in this film, okay?

[00:17:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay.

[00:17:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Because we got to fucking, we got to...

[00:17:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Relax, let's just tell the story.

[00:17:06] [SPEAKER_02]: David, I'm so frustrated with this movie.

[00:17:10] [SPEAKER_02]: You're worried too much.

[00:17:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Do you remember last week when I was hoping

[00:17:14] [SPEAKER_02]: that I would like it, watching the whole thing?

[00:17:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, well, that was just stupid.

[00:17:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it was dumb.

[00:17:19] [SPEAKER_01]: That was real stupid of you.

[00:17:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:17:22] [SPEAKER_02]: We should also say that you earlier today

[00:17:24] [SPEAKER_02]: saw a very depressing, traumatic movie.

[00:17:26] [SPEAKER_02]: And I earlier today had to say goodbye

[00:17:28] [SPEAKER_02]: to a friend who's moving to LA and I'm very upset about it.

[00:17:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, who?

[00:17:31] [SPEAKER_02]: My manager.

[00:17:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Aw.

[00:17:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm sorry.

[00:17:34] [SPEAKER_02]: He's not technically my manager.

[00:17:36] [SPEAKER_02]: He was my manager's assistant.

[00:17:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:17:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, he's...

[00:17:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Come on, my very good friend.

[00:17:41] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, we were recording this late in the day

[00:17:43] [SPEAKER_01]: and I saw Room is a real...

[00:17:44] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a punishing film.

[00:17:46] [SPEAKER_01]: It makes you feel like you're trapped

[00:17:47] [SPEAKER_01]: in a small, enclosed room from which there is no escape.

[00:17:51] [SPEAKER_02]: And another thing that makes you feel

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_02]: like you're trapped in a small room with no escape

[00:17:55] [SPEAKER_02]: is having to say goodbye to Nick Damiano.

[00:17:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Bye, Nick.

[00:17:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Bye, Nick.

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_01]: All right.

[00:18:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Please, let's carry on.

[00:18:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Find out Padme's pregnant.

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_01]: They're living in an apartment in Coruscant

[00:18:07] [SPEAKER_01]: in secret, nice and simple.

[00:18:08] [SPEAKER_01]: No one knows they're together.

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: They have a huge apartment.

[00:18:09] [SPEAKER_01]: It makes no sense.

[00:18:10] [SPEAKER_01]: She has this palatial apartment

[00:18:11] [SPEAKER_01]: with a great view of downtown Coruscant.

[00:18:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.

[00:18:16] [SPEAKER_00]: Is there not paparazzi too?

[00:18:17] [SPEAKER_00]: How are they keeping this a secret?

[00:18:19] [SPEAKER_00]: She's like in the government.

[00:18:21] [SPEAKER_01]: Hope Planet to City.

[00:18:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Pretty sure that's always going to be the answer.

[00:18:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Hope Planet to City.

[00:18:24] [SPEAKER_00]: A lot of alleys to duck down.

[00:18:26] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a big old city.

[00:18:27] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean, it's the whole planet, so...

[00:18:28] [SPEAKER_02]: There is an actor who I'm working with right now.

[00:18:32] Who?

[00:18:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't want to say anything

[00:18:34] [SPEAKER_02]: because the whole point of this story

[00:18:35] [SPEAKER_02]: is desire, fan, and animity.

[00:18:37] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not saying anything embarrassing,

[00:18:38] [SPEAKER_02]: but you'll see when I explain...

[00:18:40] [SPEAKER_02]: But you're going to tell me everything.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_02]: ...when I tell the anecdote.

[00:18:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:18:42] [SPEAKER_02]: You'll fucking...

[00:18:43] [SPEAKER_02]: You could figure it out too.

[00:18:44] [SPEAKER_02]: But...

[00:18:44] [SPEAKER_02]: I could always cut it out.

[00:18:45] [SPEAKER_02]: No, you're not cutting it out.

[00:18:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm trying to make a point here.

[00:18:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Ben never cuts anything out.

[00:18:49] [SPEAKER_02]: You...

[00:18:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:18:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Ben, cut out this part.

[00:18:54] [SPEAKER_01]: No, go on.

[00:18:54] [SPEAKER_01]: No bits.

[00:18:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Ben, cut out the part about you not cutting stuff out.

[00:18:57] [SPEAKER_02]: All right, fine.

[00:18:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Because that makes the podcast sound sloppy.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_02]: You're right.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_02]: You're right.

[00:19:00] [SPEAKER_02]: No bits.

[00:19:01] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, so cut...

[00:19:02] [SPEAKER_02]: Starting from when David said,

[00:19:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Ben will cut this out to right now.

[00:19:07] [SPEAKER_02]: There's an actor I'm working with right now.

[00:19:09] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh wait, but you're going to have to cut out

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_02]: either that line or the first time I said

[00:19:12] [SPEAKER_02]: there's an actor I'm working with.

[00:19:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Griffin, I hate this.

[00:19:14] [SPEAKER_02]: It'll sound like redundant.

[00:19:15] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:19:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Your snack to your working with?

[00:19:18] [SPEAKER_02]: He was talking about on set earlier this week

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_02]: how he bought a new place with his...

[00:19:26] [SPEAKER_02]: With his millions?

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_02]: His Paramore.

[00:19:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh!

[00:19:30] [SPEAKER_02]: And did it under his own name rather than

[00:19:33] [SPEAKER_02]: creating an LLC to buy the place.

[00:19:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure.

[00:19:38] [SPEAKER_02]: And because of that, I guess real estate listings are public.

[00:19:43] [SPEAKER_02]: If things are bought and sold, they just...

[00:19:45] [SPEAKER_02]: No, yeah, because the location was the article.

[00:19:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Check out like X celebrities listed their apartment or whatever.

[00:19:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Well, that's the point.

[00:19:51] [SPEAKER_02]: He just bought something and then it was just listed on

[00:19:54] [SPEAKER_02]: the Big New York Times list of apartment sales

[00:19:57] [SPEAKER_02]: in New York City.

[00:19:59] [SPEAKER_02]: And then a bunch of outlets picked up his name

[00:20:02] [SPEAKER_02]: on this list of non-famos buying stuff

[00:20:06] [SPEAKER_02]: and then it was like a fucking people magazine thing

[00:20:08] [SPEAKER_02]: and people were investigating their place and all this stuff.

[00:20:11] [SPEAKER_01]: People like to know these things.

[00:20:13] [SPEAKER_02]: The point is, it was that easy for like 47,000 outlets

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_02]: and it's like now I can't help but be hounded by

[00:20:19] [SPEAKER_02]: fucking stuff about the place I'm moving into.

[00:20:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Everyone fucking knew and now everyone knows

[00:20:25] [SPEAKER_02]: everything about his life.

[00:20:27] [SPEAKER_02]: You tell me fucking, Anakin and Padme have like a beautiful...

[00:20:32] [SPEAKER_02]: They're married?

[00:20:33] [SPEAKER_02]: They have like a beautiful, like it looks like a penthouse.

[00:20:36] [SPEAKER_01]: It's huge.

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_01]: It's got this crazy balcony.

[00:20:38] [SPEAKER_01]: It's the craziest balcony I've ever seen.

[00:20:40] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean it's almost, it's 50% balcony in this apartment.

[00:20:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Not to mention, lady's pregnant.

[00:20:45] [SPEAKER_02]: She's pregnant.

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_02]: And becoming more and more visible by the day.

[00:20:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin and her spent a ton of time together.

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_02]: They do.

[00:20:51] [SPEAKER_02]: So like probably at the end of like Jedi Council meetings

[00:20:53] [SPEAKER_02]: they're like, hey Anakin do you want to ride?

[00:20:55] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm going back to our Jedi chambers.

[00:20:59] [SPEAKER_01]: This is where we already don't know the answers.

[00:21:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Where do the Jedis live?

[00:21:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Do they live in the temple?

[00:21:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Do they have like little apartments there?

[00:21:05] [SPEAKER_01]: They probably do.

[00:21:06] [SPEAKER_01]: These questions are never answered.

[00:21:07] [SPEAKER_01]: No, but that's my assumption.

[00:21:09] [SPEAKER_01]: So my assumption is Anakin's got his Jedi temple apartment.

[00:21:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Padme bought that place by herself.

[00:21:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Right.

[00:21:15] [SPEAKER_02]: And he goes over there every night

[00:21:16] [SPEAKER_02]: and no one's ever noticed.

[00:21:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Well.

[00:21:19] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a juicy story.

[00:21:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Come on.

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I mean they've got newspapers, right?

[00:21:23] [SPEAKER_00]: They've got to have, I guess they do.

[00:21:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Do they have TVs?

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, there's someone who would fucking scoop this.

[00:21:26] [SPEAKER_00]: I don't know.

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_02]: I thought for much of this movie

[00:21:29] [SPEAKER_02]: that everyone was just choosing to turn a blind eye to it.

[00:21:33] [SPEAKER_02]: And then there was a moment late in the film

[00:21:35] [SPEAKER_02]: in which Obi-Wan visits Padme

[00:21:38] [SPEAKER_02]: to warn her of the turn that Anakin has taken.

[00:21:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Is this true?

[00:21:42] [SPEAKER_02]: And he goes, Anakin's the father isn't he?

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:21:45] [SPEAKER_02]: And he has, it's like a sudden realization.

[00:21:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Do you think, because I was trying to wonder

[00:21:49] [SPEAKER_01]: if that is a realization or if he's just kind of like

[00:21:52] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to confirm what he maybe already knows.

[00:21:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Like Anakin's the father isn't he?

[00:21:56] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah but it's still a question David.

[00:21:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh sure, sure, sure.

[00:21:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:21:58] [SPEAKER_02]: As opposed to like-

[00:21:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Then he's like, I'm so sorry.

[00:22:00] [SPEAKER_02]: I spend all my time with Anakin.

[00:22:03] [SPEAKER_01]: I've known you forever.

[00:22:04] [SPEAKER_01]: He's literally my like work best friend.

[00:22:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:22:07] [SPEAKER_01]: He's my work husband.

[00:22:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:22:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Work wife.

[00:22:09] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, exactly.

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_02]: I've known, I met you the same time that he met her.

[00:22:15] [SPEAKER_02]: All this-

[00:22:16] [SPEAKER_02]: I know, I know.

[00:22:17] [SPEAKER_01]: It's all very silly.

[00:22:18] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:22:19] [SPEAKER_02]: But think about Padme who is so beloved as a queen.

[00:22:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:22:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Then becomes a senator.

[00:22:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure.

[00:22:29] [SPEAKER_02]: People fucking love her even more.

[00:22:30] [SPEAKER_02]: There's an assassination attempt on her.

[00:22:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah she's the leader of the anti-war effort.

[00:22:34] [SPEAKER_01]: She's a huge fucking figure.

[00:22:36] [SPEAKER_01]: So you're saying like why isn't anyone asking

[00:22:38] [SPEAKER_01]: any questions about her?

[00:22:39] [SPEAKER_01]: She's pregnant and no one's even asking?

[00:22:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe, look maybe a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

[00:22:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Society was a little more evolved and we didn't get into

[00:22:46] [SPEAKER_01]: people's personal lives, you know?

[00:22:48] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not saying we gotta fucking, you know, show the

[00:22:50] [SPEAKER_02]: spinning newspaper headlines of the Jedi gossip rags.

[00:22:54] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just saying don't you think there should at least

[00:22:56] [SPEAKER_02]: be a scene where Yoda is like...

[00:22:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Pregnant Padme is.

[00:23:01] [SPEAKER_02]: The father there must be.

[00:23:02] [SPEAKER_01]: No, because then that would show you that the Jedi

[00:23:05] [SPEAKER_01]: have the powers of deductive reasoning which

[00:23:07] [SPEAKER_01]: this entire film and this entire series shows you

[00:23:09] [SPEAKER_01]: they do not.

[00:23:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I can't believe it took them ten years to figure out

[00:23:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine.

[00:23:15] [SPEAKER_01]: How many years did they hang out with Palpatine?

[00:23:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Ten years, right?

[00:23:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Have meetings with him?

[00:23:18] [SPEAKER_01]: No I tried to calculate this because what?

[00:23:20] [SPEAKER_01]: It's...

[00:23:20] [SPEAKER_01]: No it's ten years, it's no it's more isn't it?

[00:23:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Because isn't there nine years between

[00:23:24] [SPEAKER_01]: Phantom and Attack or is it seven?

[00:23:25] [SPEAKER_01]: No I think it's seven?

[00:23:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Okay so yeah it's about ten years total.

[00:23:28] [SPEAKER_01]: And like three years of Clone Wars.

[00:23:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:23:29] [SPEAKER_02]: From the time this may start, yeah.

[00:23:30] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean I get that Palpatine's a sit forward

[00:23:32] [SPEAKER_01]: and we'll get into this in future episodes.

[00:23:34] [SPEAKER_01]: But how did the Jedi's not even have an inkling,

[00:23:38] [SPEAKER_01]: especially as they're like wow a Sith Lord's

[00:23:40] [SPEAKER_01]: really up to something.

[00:23:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Also the leader of the galaxy is like

[00:23:44] [SPEAKER_01]: consolidating power and creating clone armies

[00:23:47] [SPEAKER_01]: out of nowhere.

[00:23:48] [SPEAKER_02]: See I kept on watching this movie.

[00:23:49] [SPEAKER_02]: I wonder if these things are connected!

[00:23:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I kept on watching this movie giving it

[00:23:52] [SPEAKER_02]: the benefit of the doubt and going like

[00:23:54] [SPEAKER_02]: okay this realization just must have

[00:23:55] [SPEAKER_02]: happened off screen.

[00:23:57] [SPEAKER_02]: And then there'll be a scene like twenty

[00:23:59] [SPEAKER_02]: minutes before the film ends in which Yoda

[00:24:01] [SPEAKER_02]: reveals for the first time that that

[00:24:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Palpatine is Darth Sidious.

[00:24:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Everyone's like oh no.

[00:24:08] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like I thought...

[00:24:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Alright so back to Anakin.

[00:24:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay so Anakin.

[00:24:14] [SPEAKER_01]: There's just, I mean it's so easy to get

[00:24:16] [SPEAKER_01]: frustrated with this film.

[00:24:17] [SPEAKER_02]: These are ostensibly kids movies right?

[00:24:20] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean I guess so but this one's the

[00:24:21] [SPEAKER_01]: PG-13 movie.

[00:24:23] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a little more violent.

[00:24:24] [SPEAKER_01]: But these are a little sadder.

[00:24:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Ostensibly.

[00:24:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah family films.

[00:24:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Family films.

[00:24:32] [SPEAKER_02]: They introduce us to a little boy in the

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_02]: first movie.

[00:24:34] [SPEAKER_02]: The second movie they show us a teen

[00:24:36] [SPEAKER_02]: going through rough years and the third

[00:24:37] [SPEAKER_02]: movie they go hey fuck you for liking this guy.

[00:24:41] [SPEAKER_02]: He's the worst.

[00:24:43] [SPEAKER_01]: He's a bad boy.

[00:24:44] [SPEAKER_02]: Watch him murder everybody.

[00:24:45] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think that's true.

[00:24:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm gonna disagree with you.

[00:24:48] [SPEAKER_01]: What do you think?

[00:24:48] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't think that the movie is angry

[00:24:49] [SPEAKER_01]: with us for liking the guy.

[00:24:50] [SPEAKER_01]: I think it's just a tragic fall.

[00:24:54] [SPEAKER_01]: You know right?

[00:24:54] [SPEAKER_01]: It's like we're watching the tragic

[00:24:57] [SPEAKER_01]: fall of everything.

[00:24:58] [SPEAKER_01]: It's like the kind of fall of the Roman Empire.

[00:25:01] [SPEAKER_01]: We've got the Jedi's,

[00:25:02] [SPEAKER_01]: we've got the old republic,

[00:25:04] [SPEAKER_01]: we've got the prophecy of the chosen one

[00:25:07] [SPEAKER_01]: and it all just crumbles before our eyes.

[00:25:10] [SPEAKER_02]: So is this movie just saying?

[00:25:11] [SPEAKER_02]: It's just a tragedy.

[00:25:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Everything's terrible.

[00:25:14] [SPEAKER_01]: I guess so.

[00:25:16] There's no...

[00:25:17] [SPEAKER_01]: like...

[00:25:18] [SPEAKER_01]: there are a couple but there's not a

[00:25:19] [SPEAKER_01]: lot of notes of hope in this film.

[00:25:22] [SPEAKER_02]: No, I could use a little hope.

[00:25:24] [SPEAKER_01]: There's a couple dangling threads

[00:25:25] [SPEAKER_01]: but that's about it.

[00:25:26] [SPEAKER_02]: You know my trademark catchphrase right?

[00:25:28] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't.

[00:25:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Everything's terrible.

[00:25:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Everyone's the worst.

[00:25:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Oh yeah of course I know that.

[00:25:32] [SPEAKER_01]: It's a great catchphrase.

[00:25:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Right it does feel kind of like

[00:25:34] [SPEAKER_02]: that's maybe what Georgie

[00:25:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Porgy's trying to get at in this movie.

[00:25:36] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't think he's angry at the viewer

[00:25:39] [SPEAKER_02]: for liking Anakin in the first two films

[00:25:41] [SPEAKER_02]: and also to say that the viewer likes

[00:25:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin's a bit of a stretch.

[00:25:45] [SPEAKER_01]: He is clearly presented as...

[00:25:47] [SPEAKER_01]: He's tough to like in any of these

[00:25:48] [SPEAKER_02]: in the first one even.

[00:25:49] [SPEAKER_02]: A hobble by performance and writing

[00:25:51] [SPEAKER_02]: but he's positioned as the character

[00:25:53] [SPEAKER_02]: we're supposed to like right?

[00:25:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Um, I guess so.

[00:25:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Dramatically across these three films

[00:25:59] [SPEAKER_02]: he's positioned as the character

[00:26:00] [SPEAKER_02]: whose journey we are watching.

[00:26:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah he's the protagonist

[00:26:06] [SPEAKER_01]: kind of?

[00:26:06] [SPEAKER_01]: These movies are so cool.

[00:26:07] [SPEAKER_01]: He's really the protagonist of the second film?

[00:26:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah very much.

[00:26:11] [SPEAKER_01]: I think in this one Obi-Wan is the

[00:26:13] [SPEAKER_01]: protagonist.

[00:26:14] [SPEAKER_01]: If Padme's the protagonist of the first film

[00:26:16] [SPEAKER_01]: you got like a triptych going on.

[00:26:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Because this movie

[00:26:20] [SPEAKER_01]: once there's that big turn about halfway through

[00:26:23] [SPEAKER_01]: that we're about to get to

[00:26:24] [SPEAKER_01]: it kind of gets delivered into the...

[00:26:27] [SPEAKER_01]: You know Obi-Wan becomes our hero

[00:26:31] [SPEAKER_01]: and it's a bad hero job

[00:26:33] [SPEAKER_01]: he's got to salvage what he can.

[00:26:35] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just a weird fucking dramatic structure.

[00:26:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah well it really does yeah.

[00:26:40] [SPEAKER_01]: It feels like it's just the ends justify the means

[00:26:42] [SPEAKER_01]: but they don't you know?

[00:26:44] [SPEAKER_02]: But see there is this part of it to me

[00:26:46] [SPEAKER_02]: that feels like a fucking like

[00:26:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Michelle Hannecke film.

[00:26:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Like it feels like

[00:26:50] [SPEAKER_02]: he's trying to make us as uncomfortable

[00:26:52] [SPEAKER_02]: as possible.

[00:26:53] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah these films are just about like entropy.

[00:26:55] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just like the inevitability of decay.

[00:26:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Right and then video game fights

[00:26:59] [SPEAKER_02]: and then just flubber in between.

[00:27:01] [SPEAKER_01]: So let's just I'm just going to briefly take us through Anakin.

[00:27:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah let's just do it.

[00:27:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin put in this movie.

[00:27:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Alright so Anakin returns home

[00:27:10] [SPEAKER_01]: with the Clone Wars winding down.

[00:27:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Padme is pregnant.

[00:27:12] [SPEAKER_01]: He starts having dreams of her in pain

[00:27:16] [SPEAKER_01]: perhaps dying.

[00:27:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Yep you're right.

[00:27:18] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah classic Shmi style.

[00:27:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Yes the Jedi's finally suspicious of Palpatine

[00:27:25] [SPEAKER_01]: decide to put Anakin their most volatile Jedi

[00:27:30] [SPEAKER_01]: in like in charge of like

[00:27:33] [SPEAKER_01]: watching over him basically as a double agent.

[00:27:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I got to pause again.

[00:27:36] [SPEAKER_02]: David I don't even think it's as much that the Jedi's

[00:27:38] [SPEAKER_02]: don't have deductive reasoning.

[00:27:40] [SPEAKER_02]: I just think the Jedi's don't fucking pay attention

[00:27:41] [SPEAKER_02]: because if there's one thing they should have learned by now

[00:27:44] [SPEAKER_02]: it's don't send Anakin alone on an admission.

[00:27:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Don't send him on any admissions.

[00:27:48] [SPEAKER_01]: It's exactly true.

[00:27:49] [SPEAKER_01]: He's terrible at missions.

[00:27:50] [SPEAKER_01]: But like they antagonize him

[00:27:52] [SPEAKER_01]: so many times in this movie.

[00:27:54] [SPEAKER_02]: Oh there's this whole fucking plot development

[00:27:56] [SPEAKER_02]: where they

[00:27:59] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine requests that he be on the Jedi Council

[00:28:01] [SPEAKER_01]: as his personal representative.

[00:28:04] [SPEAKER_01]: They agree to this for some reason

[00:28:06] [SPEAKER_01]: but won't grant him the rank of Jedi master

[00:28:08] [SPEAKER_01]: some sort of weird like

[00:28:10] [SPEAKER_01]: fuck you you know hey we still got some power

[00:28:13] [SPEAKER_01]: because he's too young I guess.

[00:28:15] [SPEAKER_02]: But that makes almost no sense.

[00:28:16] [SPEAKER_02]: It makes no sense at all

[00:28:17] [SPEAKER_02]: because they want him to be a double agent.

[00:28:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Even with the crazy space world logic

[00:28:20] [SPEAKER_02]: it makes no sense.

[00:28:22] [SPEAKER_01]: At the same time they're saying to Anakin

[00:28:24] [SPEAKER_01]: keep an eye on Palpatine

[00:28:25] [SPEAKER_01]: he's real suspicious

[00:28:26] [SPEAKER_01]: we don't know what he's up to.

[00:28:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Anyway we're not granting you any titles

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_01]: and you better watch yourself.

[00:28:31] [SPEAKER_02]: It's like allowing someone to vote in the House of Representatives

[00:28:34] [SPEAKER_02]: but not giving them any office.

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_01]: You know?

[00:28:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah exactly.

[00:28:38] [SPEAKER_01]: And then at the same time asking them to conduct

[00:28:41] [SPEAKER_01]: a secret envoy to the Soviet Union.

[00:28:43] [SPEAKER_02]: Right okay so both sides are going like

[00:28:45] [SPEAKER_02]: we're a little worried about

[00:28:46] [SPEAKER_02]: can you look on the other side

[00:28:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and tell us what's going on.

[00:28:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah Palpatine's asking Anakin to play

[00:28:52] [SPEAKER_01]: double agent you know or triple agent

[00:28:54] [SPEAKER_01]: with the Jedi's.

[00:28:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin who from the beginning they always said

[00:28:58] [SPEAKER_01]: this dude can't control his emotions.

[00:29:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Unstable too old when he was recruited

[00:29:02] [SPEAKER_01]: not in control of his emotions.

[00:29:04] [SPEAKER_01]: Let's put him in the middle of a tug of war.

[00:29:05] [SPEAKER_01]: He's having these dreams

[00:29:06] [SPEAKER_01]: he's worried about his wife.

[00:29:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:29:09] [SPEAKER_01]: And totally randomly

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_01]: in an opera house one night.

[00:29:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Maybe my favorite scene on the movie.

[00:29:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Certainly the best scene in the movie

[00:29:17] [SPEAKER_01]: but that is not even a bar.

[00:29:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Can we just point out two things

[00:29:22] [SPEAKER_02]: that are great in this scene?

[00:29:23] [SPEAKER_01]: No because we can get to that later with Palpatine right?

[00:29:26] [SPEAKER_01]: I think so.

[00:29:27] [SPEAKER_02]: I just want to say the opera is cool.

[00:29:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah opera's very cool.

[00:29:29] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a cool space opera.

[00:29:30] [SPEAKER_02]: It's a cool space opera.

[00:29:30] [SPEAKER_01]: We'll talk about it later.

[00:29:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:29:33] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine mentions like you know the dark lords of the Sith

[00:29:35] [SPEAKER_01]: kind of know how to bring people back from the dead

[00:29:37] [SPEAKER_01]: or at least one of them did.

[00:29:38] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll tell you guys.

[00:29:39] [SPEAKER_02]: We'll talk about that more in another episode

[00:29:41] [SPEAKER_02]: but he dangles this carrot.

[00:29:43] [SPEAKER_01]: Armed with this measly piece of gossip.

[00:29:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Here say.

[00:29:48] [SPEAKER_01]: Here say.

[00:29:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:29:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin I guess just deduces that he's a Sith Lord?

[00:29:55] [SPEAKER_02]: He doesn't cross reference this with anybody.

[00:30:00] [SPEAKER_02]: No, doesn't talk to anyone else.

[00:30:02] [SPEAKER_00]: We know they have a library.

[00:30:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Well but in his defense the jacquas and new real pain

[00:30:08] [SPEAKER_02]: play fast and lose the leading files.

[00:30:11] [SPEAKER_01]: It's just real pain in the ass.

[00:30:12] [SPEAKER_02]: But he does trust Obi-Wan.

[00:30:15] [SPEAKER_02]: That's true.

[00:30:15] [SPEAKER_02]: And at this point Palpatine has not tried to instill

[00:30:19] [SPEAKER_02]: doubt in him.

[00:30:20] [SPEAKER_02]: Not really.

[00:30:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.

[00:30:23] [SPEAKER_02]: So he just kind of like would trust Obi-Wan at this point

[00:30:29] [SPEAKER_02]: and Palpatine would tell him this thing.

[00:30:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Look Obi-

[00:30:32] [SPEAKER_01]: No, no I know.

[00:30:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Obi-Wan's basically saying like I know you're a Jedi

[00:30:38] [SPEAKER_01]: but you're worried about your wife

[00:30:39] [SPEAKER_01]: and unfortunately the dark side is the only part

[00:30:42] [SPEAKER_01]: of the force that can do the kind of shit

[00:30:44] [SPEAKER_01]: we're talking about.

[00:30:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay so even if he's conflicted enough

[00:30:47] [SPEAKER_02]: and he's still trying to figure out the land

[00:30:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and he doesn't want to rat out Palpatine

[00:30:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I do think he would turn to somebody.

[00:30:52] [SPEAKER_02]: A Kenobi, a Yoda, a Windu, a Cloone even.

[00:30:57] [SPEAKER_02]: A Poof.

[00:30:59] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't.

[00:31:01] [SPEAKER_01]: A Mundi.

[00:31:01] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't.

[00:31:02] [SPEAKER_01]: A Gallea.

[00:31:03] [SPEAKER_01]: Now but then he does figure out that Palpatine

[00:31:06] [SPEAKER_01]: is a dead lord.

[00:31:06] [SPEAKER_01]: A Fisto.

[00:31:07] [SPEAKER_02]: How does he figure it out exactly?

[00:31:08] [SPEAKER_02]: So the point is I think he would turn to them

[00:31:10] [SPEAKER_02]: and just go hey have you heard anything

[00:31:12] [SPEAKER_02]: about anyone being able to prevent that?

[00:31:15] [SPEAKER_01]: He doesn't do this.

[00:31:16] [SPEAKER_02]: He just goes huh interesting.

[00:31:17] [SPEAKER_01]: Darth Plagueis you say anyway.

[00:31:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:31:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Still having these dreams.

[00:31:22] [SPEAKER_02]: Then there's a, I don't remember why he's there

[00:31:23] [SPEAKER_02]: but there's a scene where he goes to Palpatine's office.

[00:31:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Yep.

[00:31:28] [SPEAKER_01]: You probably just watched this movie and you're trying

[00:31:30] [SPEAKER_01]: to remember exactly how does he figure out

[00:31:32] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine is the Sith Lord.

[00:31:34] [SPEAKER_02]: I rewatched, I saw the jerk last night again

[00:31:38] [SPEAKER_02]: for the on team time as well.

[00:31:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure.

[00:31:41] [SPEAKER_02]: One of my favorite movies ever.

[00:31:43] [SPEAKER_02]: And there is at the end of the jerk

[00:31:45] [SPEAKER_02]: spoiler alert.

[00:31:46] [SPEAKER_02]: You know the movie's him narrating as a homeless bum

[00:31:49] [SPEAKER_02]: his fall from grace.

[00:31:51] [SPEAKER_02]: At the end of the movie he's like well so that's my story.

[00:31:54] [SPEAKER_02]: Then a car pulls up and I go have any of you

[00:31:56] [SPEAKER_02]: ever heard of Naven Johnson?

[00:31:58] [SPEAKER_02]: And he's like oh I have.

[00:31:59] [SPEAKER_02]: And they get out and it's his family.

[00:32:01] [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.

[00:32:02] [SPEAKER_02]: And they're like Naven we struck rich,

[00:32:03] [SPEAKER_02]: we've been looking for you.

[00:32:05] [SPEAKER_02]: And he goes how do you know where to find me?

[00:32:07] [SPEAKER_02]: And they go we didn't this was just the first

[00:32:08] [SPEAKER_02]: place we looked which is one of my favorite jokes ever.

[00:32:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Right I remember that.

[00:32:12] [SPEAKER_01]: That is very funny.

[00:32:13] [SPEAKER_02]: He's on a random street quarter there's no way

[00:32:15] [SPEAKER_02]: they would have found him.

[00:32:16] [SPEAKER_02]: And they're like we literally just got in a car.

[00:32:18] [SPEAKER_02]: We pulled over.

[00:32:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:32:19] [SPEAKER_02]: We yelled out to say no Naven Johnson

[00:32:21] [SPEAKER_02]: and this was the first place.

[00:32:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Uh huh.

[00:32:22] [SPEAKER_02]: All three Phantom Menace movies operate with this kind

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_02]: of logic.

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah they really do.

[00:32:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Things happen without anyone any other option.

[00:32:30] [SPEAKER_01]: People really rapidly.

[00:32:31] [SPEAKER_02]: People just show up at a place either because

[00:32:35] [SPEAKER_02]: something great is going to happen or something

[00:32:36] [SPEAKER_02]: terrible is going to happen at the very moment

[00:32:39] [SPEAKER_02]: that they show up there.

[00:32:40] [SPEAKER_02]: And it's often unclear why they went there.

[00:32:42] [SPEAKER_01]: So Anakin I guess Palpatine reveals that he's a Sith

[00:32:45] [SPEAKER_01]: Lord.

[00:32:46] [SPEAKER_02]: We'll rewatch the scene in the fucking Palpatine episode

[00:32:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and we'll cover it.

[00:32:48] [SPEAKER_02]: We already forget.

[00:32:49] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin goes to his credit goes to Mace Windu and

[00:32:53] [SPEAKER_01]: says I think he's a Sith Lord.

[00:32:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Mace Windu rolls up with a couple other Jedi

[00:32:58] [SPEAKER_01]: I think four total.

[00:33:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I think a Fisto.

[00:33:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, get Fisto and a couple I mean real nobody's.

[00:33:05] [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah.

[00:33:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine kills them all except for Windu.

[00:33:10] [SPEAKER_01]: But Windu almost has Palpatine pinned and then

[00:33:13] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin intervenes he arrives later so it looks like

[00:33:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Windu's kind of going to kill Palpatine without

[00:33:19] [SPEAKER_01]: arresting him.

[00:33:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah I mean we don't want to talk about the Palpatine

[00:33:21] [SPEAKER_01]: stuff too much.

[00:33:21] [SPEAKER_01]: No but this is Anakin.

[00:33:22] [SPEAKER_01]: I know.

[00:33:23] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin makes the decision to cut off Mace

[00:33:26] [SPEAKER_01]: Windu's hand.

[00:33:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Let's just say Palpatine just keeps on

[00:33:29] [SPEAKER_02]: buttering him right over and over again not

[00:33:31] [SPEAKER_02]: just with the death thing but saying like you

[00:33:33] [SPEAKER_02]: don't understand they're like not telling

[00:33:36] [SPEAKER_02]: you the whole story.

[00:33:37] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah yeah yeah.

[00:33:38] [SPEAKER_02]: You know he's like essentially like.

[00:33:40] [SPEAKER_01]: He's tempting him with power with sort of vague

[00:33:42] [SPEAKER_02]: promises of power.

[00:33:43] [SPEAKER_02]: It's the plot of limitless like he's going like

[00:33:44] [SPEAKER_02]: you're using 10% of your fault.

[00:33:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Right.

[00:33:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Imagine if you could use a hundred.

[00:33:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Got you got you.

[00:33:49] [SPEAKER_02]: You know he's teasing Anakin with the promise

[00:33:51] [SPEAKER_02]: of maybe being a Lucy.

[00:33:53] [SPEAKER_01]: At the same time this scene.

[00:33:56] [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you for laughing at that.

[00:33:57] [SPEAKER_01]: I like Lucy.

[00:33:58] [SPEAKER_01]: Lucy rules it's a great movie.

[00:34:00] [SPEAKER_01]: The scene where Windu is the anti-revenge

[00:34:01] [SPEAKER_01]: of the Sith.

[00:34:02] [SPEAKER_01]: The scene where Windu is subduing Palpatine

[00:34:04] [SPEAKER_01]: and is like we have to kill him he's just

[00:34:06] [SPEAKER_01]: too dangerous.

[00:34:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.

[00:34:08] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin literally just found out this guy's a

[00:34:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Sith Lord but he decides to side with him

[00:34:13] [SPEAKER_01]: on the vague promise.

[00:34:15] [SPEAKER_01]: He I think he says repeatedly like I need

[00:34:16] [SPEAKER_01]: him I need him.

[00:34:17] [SPEAKER_01]: I need this power.

[00:34:18] [SPEAKER_01]: I need this power to save my wife.

[00:34:20] [SPEAKER_02]: And like Windu is like what are you talking

[00:34:22] [SPEAKER_02]: about.

[00:34:22] [SPEAKER_01]: Yeah and it was like excuse me I'm very

[00:34:24] [SPEAKER_01]: busy dealing with the guy shooting

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_01]: lightning at me.

[00:34:27] [SPEAKER_02]: A. What power are you talking of?

[00:34:29] [SPEAKER_02]: B. What thread is your wife under?

[00:34:31] [SPEAKER_02]: See you have a wife?

[00:34:32] [SPEAKER_02]: What is it?

[00:34:33] [SPEAKER_02]: What is it?

[00:34:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Anything you're talking about.

[00:34:35] [SPEAKER_01]: D. Where'd my hand go?

[00:34:37] [SPEAKER_01]: E. What's all this lightning frying me?

[00:34:39] [SPEAKER_01]: And F. I'm dead.

[00:34:40] [SPEAKER_02]: This movie is so hard it's so dense and

[00:34:42] [SPEAKER_02]: it's so simple at the same time but

[00:34:44] [SPEAKER_01]: like fucking Windu.

[00:34:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I just we really have to focus on this

[00:34:47] [SPEAKER_01]: because it is the only moment after

[00:34:49] [SPEAKER_01]: this Anakin's evil.

[00:34:51] [SPEAKER_01]: Right but Windu shows up essentially

[00:34:53] [SPEAKER_01]: functioning as a cop.

[00:34:55] [SPEAKER_02]: Let's say this right.

[00:34:56] [SPEAKER_02]: It's over we're arresting you.

[00:34:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Right which I mean why haven't the Jedi

[00:35:01] [SPEAKER_02]: has been doing this at any other point

[00:35:02] [SPEAKER_02]: in the film you know like like

[00:35:04] [SPEAKER_02]: trade federations you know at a stand

[00:35:07] [SPEAKER_02]: still they go oh well diplomatic

[00:35:09] [SPEAKER_02]: negotiations you know.

[00:35:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Aggressive negotiations.

[00:35:13] [SPEAKER_02]: The Sith are here.

[00:35:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Apparently they have the authority just

[00:35:15] [SPEAKER_02]: coming in.

[00:35:15] [SPEAKER_01]: Jedi versus Sith I think that's what

[00:35:17] [SPEAKER_01]: their basis is basically.

[00:35:19] [SPEAKER_01]: So they can arrest Sith.

[00:35:21] [SPEAKER_01]: They're like you're a Sith Lord and

[00:35:22] [SPEAKER_01]: he's like Sith Lord me check out this

[00:35:25] [SPEAKER_01]: lightsaber stab stab stab he is a

[00:35:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Sith Lord.

[00:35:28] [SPEAKER_01]: He's a Sith Lord and a real big Sith Lord.

[00:35:31] [SPEAKER_02]: He shoots the laser lightning

[00:35:33] [SPEAKER_02]: powers and Windu reflects it from his

[00:35:36] [SPEAKER_02]: blade and yes scars him or reveals

[00:35:38] [SPEAKER_02]: previous scars turns into mumbles from

[00:35:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Dick Tracing.

[00:35:45] [SPEAKER_01]: He does he does he's got a cottage cheese

[00:35:48] [SPEAKER_01]: head it's we're going to talk about

[00:35:49] [SPEAKER_01]: it that's a whole other that's him

[00:35:51] [SPEAKER_01]: next week or something we really got

[00:35:52] [SPEAKER_01]: to get to Palpatine because it's so

[00:35:53] [SPEAKER_01]: crazy.

[00:35:55] [SPEAKER_02]: And again this Anakin aids and

[00:35:58] [SPEAKER_02]: the beds in the murder of three or

[00:36:00] [SPEAKER_02]: four of his good friends and 20

[00:36:02] [SPEAKER_01]: minutes earlier he had literally

[00:36:04] [SPEAKER_01]: called the cops on this guy yeah and

[00:36:06] [SPEAKER_01]: then the guys like yo thanks for

[00:36:07] [SPEAKER_01]: helping me murder those fools those

[00:36:09] [SPEAKER_01]: cops you you called I dub the Lord

[00:36:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Darth Vader we got we got a hope we

[00:36:13] [SPEAKER_02]: got a harp on this other scene a

[00:36:14] [SPEAKER_02]: little more okay this is the scene

[00:36:16] [SPEAKER_02]: where he wants to call the cops

[00:36:17] [SPEAKER_02]: on him because like he goes to

[00:36:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Palpatine's office yeah Palpatine

[00:36:21] [SPEAKER_02]: sort of starts really tipping his

[00:36:23] [SPEAKER_02]: hand to the idea that he's a Sith

[00:36:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Lord being like do those powers

[00:36:27] [SPEAKER_02]: exist not for a Jedi right in the

[00:36:29] [SPEAKER_02]: opera scene and on this next scene

[00:36:30] [SPEAKER_02]: he's going you know I used to think

[00:36:31] [SPEAKER_02]: the powers this and that he's realizing

[00:36:33] [SPEAKER_02]: he's saying together we configured

[00:36:34] [SPEAKER_02]: the set right yeah but he didn't even

[00:36:36] [SPEAKER_02]: know up until this point that

[00:36:37] [SPEAKER_02]: Palpatine had any powers sure he's

[00:36:40] [SPEAKER_02]: a politician he's a powerless senator

[00:36:42] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah he's an old man who then

[00:36:44] [SPEAKER_02]: became a chancellor yeah right

[00:36:47] [SPEAKER_02]: now he's finding out like wait fucker's

[00:36:49] [SPEAKER_02]: got a lightsaber fuckers got the

[00:36:52] [SPEAKER_01]: force red lightsaber fucker can

[00:36:54] [SPEAKER_02]: feel what I'm thinking and feeling

[00:36:56] [SPEAKER_02]: sure right yeah and shoot lightning

[00:36:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin has a really bad reaction to this

[00:37:03] [SPEAKER_02]: he's like fuck this I don't like what's

[00:37:04] [SPEAKER_02]: going on here it's the best scene yeah

[00:37:06] [SPEAKER_02]: right Anakin almost acts the way like

[00:37:09] [SPEAKER_02]: the good kid acts in an anti-drug PSA

[00:37:12] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah whether like you want to smoke

[00:37:14] [SPEAKER_02]: potty's like I don't I don't I gotta

[00:37:16] [SPEAKER_02]: go right yeah I gotta go I'm

[00:37:20] [SPEAKER_02]: calling the cops and Palpatine's

[00:37:22] [SPEAKER_02]: like chill wait wait wait wait wait

[00:37:25] [SPEAKER_02]: just chill and it can say no no no I'm

[00:37:28] [SPEAKER_02]: calling the cops just just sit on it

[00:37:32] [SPEAKER_02]: for a little bit Anakin goes to the

[00:37:34] [SPEAKER_02]: Jedi's lets them know they come to arrest

[00:37:36] [SPEAKER_02]: him and it can say no you know what

[00:37:38] [SPEAKER_02]: fuck it out I'll let these guys having

[00:37:40] [SPEAKER_02]: arrived midway right for some reason

[00:37:42] [SPEAKER_01]: right for reasons that are big think

[00:37:45] [SPEAKER_01]: explain to the plot he's you know he

[00:37:47] [SPEAKER_01]: goes to 7-11 now and it can the

[00:37:48] [SPEAKER_01]: worst person in the world not only that

[00:37:51] [SPEAKER_01]: he is immediately Palpatine's like

[00:37:52] [SPEAKER_01]: rise Lord Vader like he's like I've

[00:37:54] [SPEAKER_01]: given you he has a name in his pocket

[00:37:57] [SPEAKER_02]: we are Vader great name cool fucking

[00:37:59] [SPEAKER_02]: we gotta say this look all the fucking

[00:38:02] [SPEAKER_01]: all the Darth names are good this is

[00:38:04] [SPEAKER_01]: the best one good mark Darth Maul great

[00:38:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Darth Tyrannus I wish they'd said it out

[00:38:08] [SPEAKER_01]: loud more but pretty cool but Darth

[00:38:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Vader this guy and there's a weight

[00:38:13] [SPEAKER_01]: to that do you know what I'm saying the

[00:38:14] [SPEAKER_01]: only problem I have with it is

[00:38:16] [SPEAKER_01]: literally that he's just like yeah

[00:38:18] [SPEAKER_01]: you know what Vader like he just he just

[00:38:19] [SPEAKER_01]: has it ready yeah but it's a great name

[00:38:23] [SPEAKER_02]: um it is the best name it's a cool name

[00:38:25] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's like alright so welcome to the

[00:38:28] [SPEAKER_01]: dark side as your initiation do please

[00:38:32] [SPEAKER_01]: go to the Jedi temple and slaughter

[00:38:34] [SPEAKER_01]: every child in it yeah and literally

[00:38:37] [SPEAKER_01]: I'm not joking like that's that's how

[00:38:39] [SPEAKER_01]: quickly that is right Ben yeah it's

[00:38:41] [SPEAKER_01]: it's not like okay so you can go to

[00:38:44] [SPEAKER_01]: my dry cleaners and get my sith robes

[00:38:46] [SPEAKER_01]: and you know he doesn't build he's just

[00:38:48] [SPEAKER_01]: like you know how there are all these

[00:38:50] [SPEAKER_01]: adorable children we've seen last movie

[00:38:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and this movie who run around the Jedi

[00:38:54] [SPEAKER_01]: temple being little types please slaughter

[00:38:56] [SPEAKER_00]: them now I think they missed out on a

[00:38:58] [SPEAKER_00]: great opportunity for a real funny scene

[00:39:01] [SPEAKER_00]: having him chase the kids around because

[00:39:03] [SPEAKER_00]: you don't get to see the murder a

[00:39:05] [SPEAKER_00]: little Betty Hill music why not I'll

[00:39:06] [SPEAKER_00]: like the classic doors you know I

[00:39:08] [SPEAKER_01]: watch this movie as I mentioned last

[00:39:11] [SPEAKER_01]: week I watched this movie my girlfriend

[00:39:13] [SPEAKER_01]: and that scene where he shows up he

[00:39:16] [SPEAKER_01]: shows up at the Jedi temple yeah and

[00:39:19] [SPEAKER_01]: he's like they're like a kid who's like

[00:39:21] [SPEAKER_01]: well you're mad at me that monster and

[00:39:24] [SPEAKER_01]: like the cutest little dweeb can you help

[00:39:27] [SPEAKER_01]: us and he just goes like she like

[00:39:30] [SPEAKER_01]: ignites his saver and no hesitation she

[00:39:31] [SPEAKER_01]: just went like yeah it was the stupidest

[00:39:35] [SPEAKER_01]: most horrifying like okay first rapid

[00:39:37] [SPEAKER_02]: transition I am I'm so close to being

[00:39:40] [SPEAKER_02]: on the verge of tears right now just

[00:39:42] [SPEAKER_02]: in frustration over everything and

[00:39:44] [SPEAKER_01]: laughing at the Benny Hill and it was

[00:39:46] [SPEAKER_02]: really funny but no but I don't want to

[00:39:50] [SPEAKER_02]: keep harping on this because I like

[00:39:52] [SPEAKER_02]: subversive cinema I'm not asking

[00:39:54] [SPEAKER_02]: everything to be put in a box I'm not

[00:39:56] [SPEAKER_02]: saying you have to fucking save the cat

[00:39:58] [SPEAKER_02]: and and I like especially within

[00:40:00] [SPEAKER_02]: mainstream filmmaking you know

[00:40:02] [SPEAKER_02]: populist filmmaking even children's

[00:40:04] [SPEAKER_02]: filmmaking to twist shit I don't have

[00:40:07] [SPEAKER_02]: no the problem is that it's

[00:40:08] [SPEAKER_02]: like so you're like a six-year-old

[00:40:11] [SPEAKER_02]: right yeah and you're fucking watching

[00:40:13] [SPEAKER_02]: the Phantom Manist trilogy

[00:40:15] [SPEAKER_02]: oh here's a movie about a little boy

[00:40:16] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm six years old I don't have to race car

[00:40:18] [SPEAKER_02]: develop critical facilities so I love it

[00:40:20] [SPEAKER_02]: I love this little go on second movie

[00:40:23] [SPEAKER_02]: who love I don't know what love is yet

[00:40:25] [SPEAKER_02]: so this film seems like an accurate

[00:40:26] [SPEAKER_02]: representation of how adults relate

[00:40:28] [SPEAKER_02]: to each other emotionally I'm in and

[00:40:30] [SPEAKER_02]: he's cutting robots who this series is

[00:40:33] [SPEAKER_02]: fun your kid this movie is made for kids

[00:40:36] [SPEAKER_02]: these movies are made for kids and

[00:40:37] [SPEAKER_02]: you watch the third movie and it's

[00:40:39] [SPEAKER_02]: like ooh Anakin's getting tempted by

[00:40:42] [SPEAKER_02]: the bad guy so this must be the setup

[00:40:43] [SPEAKER_02]: so that the end can come back and find

[00:40:45] [SPEAKER_02]: his way the good oh now he's murdering

[00:40:47] [SPEAKER_02]: kids who look like me yeah little

[00:40:50] [SPEAKER_02]: little white babies oh so everything in

[00:40:52] [SPEAKER_01]: the world is terrible I guess so this

[00:40:55] [SPEAKER_01]: is something I see this is something

[00:40:56] [SPEAKER_01]: I don't care about this I feel like this

[00:40:57] [SPEAKER_01]: is more your thing than my thing I

[00:40:59] [SPEAKER_02]: don't care about it I'm just like

[00:41:01] [SPEAKER_01]: it's just on earn my that's my

[00:41:03] [SPEAKER_01]: problem with it everything this

[00:41:04] [SPEAKER_01]: was on well that's fair but but

[00:41:06] [SPEAKER_01]: like the leap I mean the reason

[00:41:08] [SPEAKER_01]: this seems to happen in the middle of

[00:41:09] [SPEAKER_01]: movie is that we need to definitively

[00:41:11] [SPEAKER_01]: know that Anakin is beyond hope right

[00:41:14] [SPEAKER_01]: yes he doesn't act that is so

[00:41:16] [SPEAKER_01]: reprehensible zero to a hundred it's

[00:41:18] [SPEAKER_01]: exactly zero to eight hundred yeah

[00:41:20] [SPEAKER_01]: it's zero to yeah it's so stupid

[00:41:23] [SPEAKER_01]: because I and then you've got a

[00:41:25] [SPEAKER_01]: whole movie left

[00:41:27] [SPEAKER_01]: like a whole hour plus

[00:41:28] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah this is the shortest of the

[00:41:30] [SPEAKER_01]: three though it is yeah I mean

[00:41:32] [SPEAKER_01]: like I said it's really just it's

[00:41:34] [SPEAKER_01]: you know a little movie and then you

[00:41:35] [SPEAKER_02]: kind of just wrap it up yeah it's just a lot of wrap

[00:41:37] [SPEAKER_02]: up it's a lot of wrap up but the wrap up

[00:41:39] [SPEAKER_02]: is out of nowhere conclusively

[00:41:41] [SPEAKER_02]: telling us that this guy sucks and he's

[00:41:43] [SPEAKER_02]: beyond saving

[00:41:46] [SPEAKER_01]: yes probably

[00:41:48] [SPEAKER_01]: probably what he's up with the movie

[00:41:49] [SPEAKER_01]: fucking ends and he's the worst no

[00:41:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I disagree with you I don't think the

[00:41:54] [SPEAKER_01]: movie ends and he's the worst Palpatine's

[00:41:55] [SPEAKER_01]: the worst the movie ends and you're like

[00:41:57] [SPEAKER_01]: wow this guy got a raw deal this guy's

[00:41:59] [SPEAKER_02]: been fully corrupted to a Chris

[00:42:01] [SPEAKER_02]: he got burnt to a okay

[00:42:03] [SPEAKER_01]: anyway so honestly there's not much left

[00:42:05] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin after he kills the kids

[00:42:07] [SPEAKER_01]: kills the kids he starts just doing

[00:42:09] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine shit because all the other

[00:42:10] [SPEAKER_01]: jetties get wiped out we'll get to that

[00:42:12] [SPEAKER_02]: shitty part of the deal right Palpatine's like I want you to prove that

[00:42:15] [SPEAKER_02]: you're a bad guy kill some Jedi and he's

[00:42:17] [SPEAKER_02]: like okay can I kill some of the adult Jedi's

[00:42:19] [SPEAKER_01]: that I don't know that guy who's really

[00:42:21] [SPEAKER_01]: always gotten on my nerves you know I don't know

[00:42:23] [SPEAKER_02]: that well or the ones I've always had a problem

[00:42:25] [SPEAKER_02]: with the guy who got the last fucking

[00:42:27] [SPEAKER_02]: bag of rolled golds from the vending

[00:42:29] [SPEAKER_02]: machine you know whatever it and it's like

[00:42:31] [SPEAKER_02]: no you have to kill the children yeah

[00:42:33] [SPEAKER_02]: about the adults he's like I'll take care of all the adults

[00:42:35] [SPEAKER_02]: which he does and we'll get to that

[00:42:37] [SPEAKER_02]: you just killed this one room of kids we got

[00:42:39] [SPEAKER_02]: look him in the eye and fucking kill him yeah on

[00:42:41] [SPEAKER_00]: camera too yeah Ben now

[00:42:44] [SPEAKER_00]: doesn't he kill the children

[00:42:45] [SPEAKER_00]: and then very shortly

[00:42:47] [SPEAKER_00]: afterwards meets up with Padme

[00:42:49] [SPEAKER_00]: yep and basically

[00:42:51] [SPEAKER_00]: gives her you know a little

[00:42:53] [SPEAKER_00]: skirts over he's like some fucked up shit is

[00:42:55] [SPEAKER_00]: happening the Jedi are trying to take over

[00:42:57] [SPEAKER_00]: also I just killed he doesn't say that

[00:42:59] [SPEAKER_00]: part a bunch of kids no he's like he does

[00:43:01] [SPEAKER_02]: he does kind of say he's like Padme

[00:43:03] [SPEAKER_02]: we can't trust the Jedi they've gone crazy

[00:43:05] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah no he that's what he's like look

[00:43:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Jedi tried to overthrow the government

[00:43:09] [SPEAKER_01]: right they've gone berserk

[00:43:11] [SPEAKER_01]: so they need to be exterminated

[00:43:13] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah well because he's kind of like

[00:43:15] [SPEAKER_01]: he's skirting around everything she's

[00:43:17] [SPEAKER_01]: like I'm hearing the Jedi are getting wiped out and he's like

[00:43:19] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah I don't know what's happening

[00:43:21] [SPEAKER_01]: crazy stuff anyway back to work

[00:43:23] [SPEAKER_02]: well he's definitely playing into the fact that she is part of

[00:43:25] [SPEAKER_02]: the government he's like Padme before we start

[00:43:27] [SPEAKER_02]: this conversation I want to establish that you are part

[00:43:29] [SPEAKER_02]: of the government you were for most of your life

[00:43:31] [SPEAKER_02]: as someone who is

[00:43:33] [SPEAKER_02]: 29 years old for

[00:43:35] [SPEAKER_02]: 27 of those years you've been part of the

[00:43:37] [SPEAKER_02]: government right and she's like yeah

[00:43:39] [SPEAKER_02]: and he's like cool so just before we start this

[00:43:41] [SPEAKER_02]: conversation if I were to say that you

[00:43:43] [SPEAKER_02]: are in support of the government you would say yes

[00:43:45] [SPEAKER_02]: right and she's like totally and he's like okay

[00:43:47] [SPEAKER_02]: Jedi hates the government so fuck the Jedi right

[00:43:49] [SPEAKER_02]: like he's kind of

[00:43:51] [SPEAKER_02]: manipulating her past

[00:43:53] [SPEAKER_02]: I guess so but her allegiance

[00:43:54] [SPEAKER_01]: he really steamrolls her but he also doesn't

[00:43:57] [SPEAKER_01]: really win her over he just kind

[00:43:59] [SPEAKER_01]: of checks in with her

[00:44:00] [SPEAKER_01]: gets back on a ship

[00:44:03] [SPEAKER_01]: and then leads some more

[00:44:05] [SPEAKER_01]: purges of Jedi's with clone troopers

[00:44:07] [SPEAKER_02]: you know the healthy

[00:44:09] [SPEAKER_02]: and adult way to maintain

[00:44:11] [SPEAKER_02]: a marriage you know that's how you treat

[00:44:13] [SPEAKER_02]: your spouse with respect and appreciation

[00:44:15] [SPEAKER_01]: do not take spousal advice

[00:44:17] [SPEAKER_01]: from Star Wars episode 3 of

[00:44:18] [SPEAKER_01]: really a lot of mistakes made

[00:44:20] [SPEAKER_01]: such as in a little bit of a later

[00:44:22] [SPEAKER_01]: scene but pretty much the next major Anakin

[00:44:24] [SPEAKER_01]: scene yeah he sent to this planet

[00:44:26] [SPEAKER_01]: called a mustafar

[00:44:28] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah it's a lava

[00:44:30] [SPEAKER_01]: a lava planet it looks like some sort of mining

[00:44:32] [SPEAKER_01]: planet they mind a little I

[00:44:34] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah as Joanna said what do they mind

[00:44:37] [SPEAKER_01]: love

[00:44:38] [SPEAKER_02]: it's a plan where they make lava

[00:44:40] [SPEAKER_01]: it's a lava I'm sure you know I mean like

[00:44:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Super Mario World they get the lava from there

[00:44:44] [SPEAKER_01]: so he goes there to wipe out

[00:44:46] [SPEAKER_01]: the trade federation the rest of the

[00:44:48] [SPEAKER_01]: separatists yeah yeah which he does

[00:44:50] [SPEAKER_02]: very quickly and then he just goes like

[00:44:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just gonna hang out here

[00:44:53] [SPEAKER_02]: he chose a lava plan if anyone wants to see me

[00:44:56] [SPEAKER_02]: just come by the lava plan he sends out a text

[00:44:57] [SPEAKER_02]: he's like I'm gonna be a lava plan for the next two three hours

[00:44:59] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan shows up if anyone wants to come keep me company

[00:45:02] [SPEAKER_01]: Padme shows up I should say in her ship

[00:45:04] [SPEAKER_01]: comes out and says Anakin

[00:45:07] [SPEAKER_01]: couple questions a

[00:45:08] [SPEAKER_01]: were you responsible for the massive

[00:45:10] [SPEAKER_01]: curve several dozen children

[00:45:12] [SPEAKER_01]: cause I'm hearing some bad stories

[00:45:15] [SPEAKER_02]: about you it's like let's come back around to that

[00:45:16] [SPEAKER_02]: one let's question number 2

[00:45:17] [SPEAKER_01]: uh pass

[00:45:20] [SPEAKER_01]: let's put a bit in that

[00:45:21] [SPEAKER_01]: question 2 are you evil

[00:45:24] [SPEAKER_01]: pass

[00:45:25] [SPEAKER_01]: question 3 oh wait by the way here's Obi-Wan

[00:45:27] [SPEAKER_01]: and Anakin's like Obi-Wan

[00:45:29] [SPEAKER_01]: Obi-Wan you wrote in a

[00:45:31] [SPEAKER_01]: spaceship with Obi-Wan let me choke you to death

[00:45:34] [SPEAKER_01]: with my force powers

[00:45:37] [SPEAKER_00]: I did this all for you now let me

[00:45:39] [SPEAKER_02]: choke you in one way

[00:45:44] [SPEAKER_02]: like

[00:45:45] [SPEAKER_02]: there's so little to talk about with this movie

[00:45:47] [SPEAKER_02]: and another way we could analyze

[00:45:48] [SPEAKER_02]: every single second for 500 years

[00:45:51] [SPEAKER_01]: it just makes no sense

[00:45:52] [SPEAKER_02]: like you said this movie you were talking

[00:45:54] [SPEAKER_01]: about it before right like the way that it

[00:45:56] [SPEAKER_01]: just suddenly like makes a decision

[00:45:58] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah the way he suddenly is like

[00:46:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Obi-Wan's on the

[00:46:02] [SPEAKER_01]: fucking spaceship with you

[00:46:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan goes

[00:46:06] [SPEAKER_02]: and warns we're doing this out of order this is our

[00:46:08] [SPEAKER_02]: fucking we're doing an Anakin

[00:46:10] [SPEAKER_01]: episode yeah because Obi-Wan

[00:46:12] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah he says to pet me like fyi I know

[00:46:14] [SPEAKER_01]: you saw Anakin earlier but he did kill a

[00:46:16] [SPEAKER_01]: bunch of children sorry that his kid is yours

[00:46:18] [SPEAKER_02]: I speak for myself I don't speak for you

[00:46:20] [SPEAKER_02]: here my brains have a hard time fucking

[00:46:22] [SPEAKER_02]: a crap in itself around

[00:46:24] [SPEAKER_02]: it all happened so fast yeah but

[00:46:26] [SPEAKER_01]: we're not even getting the fact that the clone

[00:46:28] [SPEAKER_01]: troopers just wipe out the Jedi

[00:46:29] [SPEAKER_01]: that's another episode it's crazy

[00:46:32] [SPEAKER_02]: it's a horrible horrible

[00:46:34] [SPEAKER_02]: it's probably the greatest tragedy in

[00:46:36] [SPEAKER_02]: the history of that galaxy right it's

[00:46:38] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah it is

[00:46:40] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah it's a space holocaust

[00:46:42] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah of the most

[00:46:44] [SPEAKER_01]: like powerful people in space

[00:46:46] [SPEAKER_01]: and the most noble people yeah yeah yeah

[00:46:48] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah like that's another

[00:46:50] [SPEAKER_02]: that's another episode that's another episode

[00:46:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I could talk about that for 40 billion years

[00:46:54] [SPEAKER_02]: whatever yeah yeah

[00:46:55] [SPEAKER_02]: uh Obi-Wan goes to visit

[00:46:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Padme says

[00:46:59] [SPEAKER_02]: hey oh oh oh cause there's this fucking

[00:47:02] [SPEAKER_02]: scene there's the scene they

[00:47:04] [SPEAKER_02]: mmm what

[00:47:06] [SPEAKER_02]: this is just

[00:47:07] [SPEAKER_02]: what scene what scene there's this is just

[00:47:09] [SPEAKER_02]: necessary in order to tell the story properly for the sake of this episode

[00:47:11] [SPEAKER_02]: we're not gonna harp on it but they go to

[00:47:13] [SPEAKER_02]: the fucking Jedi council to change

[00:47:15] [SPEAKER_02]: the signal so that no one

[00:47:17] [SPEAKER_02]: the jedi's don't go there

[00:47:19] [SPEAKER_02]: they don't know if any other jedi's are still alive

[00:47:21] [SPEAKER_02]: right right right Obi-Wan and Yoder

[00:47:23] [SPEAKER_02]: the last two jedi's living right now they go to the Jedi council

[00:47:25] [SPEAKER_02]: to turn off the Jimmy Smith Jimmy Smith's

[00:47:27] [SPEAKER_02]: like I'm with you we got a fucking start up

[00:47:29] [SPEAKER_02]: outlaw group yeah me you and me you

[00:47:31] [SPEAKER_02]: and Obi-Wan right and they're like okay let's just go back

[00:47:33] [SPEAKER_02]: to the Jedi council

[00:47:35] [SPEAKER_01]: lock up shop turn off the

[00:47:36] [SPEAKER_01]: the light I just wanna clean out my locker

[00:47:38] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah turn off the lights we're not

[00:47:40] [SPEAKER_02]: supposed to harp on this come on and put a note that says hey

[00:47:42] [SPEAKER_02]: jedi's don't come back here right when

[00:47:44] [SPEAKER_02]: they're there they see all the dead

[00:47:46] [SPEAKER_02]: baby children yep Obi-Wan's

[00:47:48] [SPEAKER_02]: response is like

[00:47:50] [SPEAKER_02]: oh my god this is terrible

[00:47:52] [SPEAKER_02]: like that level of emotion I know yeah

[00:47:54] [SPEAKER_02]: oh my god dead children this sucks

[00:47:56] [SPEAKER_02]: they're like who did this they go

[00:47:58] [SPEAKER_02]: through the security camera footage

[00:48:00] [SPEAKER_02]: clean crisp video it's great

[00:48:02] [SPEAKER_02]: of every important scene that has happened so far

[00:48:05] [SPEAKER_02]: in the movie

[00:48:08] [SPEAKER_02]: of Anakin

[00:48:10] [SPEAKER_02]: killing the children

[00:48:11] [SPEAKER_02]: of Palpatine Dovingham Lord Vader

[00:48:14] [SPEAKER_02]: of the crawl they watch a hologram

[00:48:16] [SPEAKER_02]: of the crawl

[00:48:18] [SPEAKER_02]: they're like right that was what we watched

[00:48:20] [SPEAKER_00]: the Clone Wars the Jenny Tartotowski miniseries

[00:48:22] [SPEAKER_00]: yeah yeah yeah once again they're

[00:48:24] [SPEAKER_00]: borrowing from space balls

[00:48:26] [SPEAKER_00]: yeah stealing the idea

[00:48:28] [SPEAKER_00]: that you could watch the movie as you're watching it

[00:48:30] [SPEAKER_02]: there's a merchandise spotlight on the hologram

[00:48:32] [SPEAKER_02]: they listen to this podcast

[00:48:34] [SPEAKER_02]: on the hologram they listen to us

[00:48:37] [SPEAKER_02]: right now at fucking struggling to talk

[00:48:38] [SPEAKER_02]: about this okay but so

[00:48:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan knows conclusively and he goes

[00:48:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin how's that possible

[00:48:44] [SPEAKER_02]: as opposed to being like no no no no

[00:48:46] [SPEAKER_02]: no no no no or being like

[00:48:48] [SPEAKER_02]: fucking Anakin I knew it like the emotional

[00:48:50] [SPEAKER_02]: response that anyone would have yeah I

[00:48:52] [SPEAKER_01]: know but that's the problem with the jedi's they don't have

[00:48:54] [SPEAKER_01]: normal emotional responses to anything

[00:48:56] [SPEAKER_02]: first rule of improv as far as I'm concerned is

[00:48:59] [SPEAKER_02]: make strong emotional

[00:49:00] [SPEAKER_02]: emotional choices I always don't think

[00:49:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I I think the first rule you see me

[00:49:05] [SPEAKER_02]: all right anyway but but it's like make

[00:49:07] [SPEAKER_02]: strong emotional choices and it's like

[00:49:08] [SPEAKER_02]: there are four or five different strong emotional

[00:49:10] [SPEAKER_02]: ways that Obi-Wan could react to this is an

[00:49:12] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin episode come on now get back

[00:49:14] [SPEAKER_02]: to it

[00:49:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan goes to Padme tells her what's up

[00:49:18] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah she's like I don't think so Anakin

[00:49:21] [SPEAKER_02]: he's like is that ankins baby

[00:49:23] [SPEAKER_02]: she's like how do you know

[00:49:24] [SPEAKER_01]: she's like wait what what

[00:49:28] [SPEAKER_02]: who they're getting a spaceship

[00:49:29] [SPEAKER_02]: together he's like she's like just let

[00:49:31] [SPEAKER_02]: presumably this happens after she's like

[00:49:33] [SPEAKER_02]: let me just go and talk to you stay in the ship

[00:49:34] [SPEAKER_01]: I'll talk to him and I'm sure it's a whole big misunderstanding

[00:49:37] [SPEAKER_02]: they're talking he's

[00:49:39] [SPEAKER_02]: not being violent but he's just like Padme

[00:49:41] [SPEAKER_02]: no yeah I suck

[00:49:43] [SPEAKER_02]: there's like 50 yards between them

[00:49:45] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's got the same really and and

[00:49:47] [SPEAKER_01]: she's kind of like Padme he's he's like

[00:49:49] [SPEAKER_01]: you gotta just join me she's like um

[00:49:51] [SPEAKER_01]: no because you're over throwing

[00:49:53] [SPEAKER_01]: the government also apparently he killed some

[00:49:55] [SPEAKER_01]: children he's like so you're against me

[00:49:56] [SPEAKER_01]: she's like no no Anakin

[00:49:58] [SPEAKER_02]: I love you which is lunatic

[00:50:00] [SPEAKER_02]: talk yeah I mean she's speaking like like an

[00:50:02] [SPEAKER_01]: abuse she should literally just get back in the ship and

[00:50:04] [SPEAKER_01]: be like shoot him with the lasers on the ship

[00:50:06] [SPEAKER_02]: right to death with the laser not the man I

[00:50:09] [SPEAKER_02]: love yeah to which everyone will respond

[00:50:10] [SPEAKER_02]: we didn't know what you liked him in the first

[00:50:12] [SPEAKER_02]: guy always sucked he's shitty Obi-Wan

[00:50:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Obi-Wan dangling right there

[00:50:17] [SPEAKER_02]: that's a whole another episode I want to

[00:50:18] [SPEAKER_02]: fat tube us and I'm gonna write

[00:50:20] [SPEAKER_02]: my fanfiction about Obi-Wan and Padme

[00:50:22] [SPEAKER_02]: together because there's a couple scenes

[00:50:24] [SPEAKER_02]: in this movie where it kind of feels like they'd be a good couple

[00:50:28] [SPEAKER_02]: anyway

[00:50:29] [SPEAKER_02]: they're talking

[00:50:30] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan comes out like didn't wait for

[00:50:32] [SPEAKER_02]: his cue I know Obi-Wan I will admit

[00:50:34] [SPEAKER_01]: jumps the gun to slight bad timing

[00:50:36] [SPEAKER_01]: I know it's the worst possible time you're dealing

[00:50:38] [SPEAKER_01]: with it how are you so you're against

[00:50:40] [SPEAKER_01]: me you're not on my side here

[00:50:43] [SPEAKER_01]: you're with you're with him not me

[00:50:44] [SPEAKER_01]: and he shows up when he's like anakin

[00:50:46] [SPEAKER_01]: you you know again watch the

[00:50:48] [SPEAKER_01]: security footage yeah I've watched

[00:50:50] [SPEAKER_01]: George Lucas' Star Wars episode three

[00:50:52] [SPEAKER_02]: revenge the Sith yeah they had a blu-ray copy

[00:50:54] [SPEAKER_02]: of it I know exactly what

[00:50:56] [SPEAKER_02]: happened

[00:50:58] [SPEAKER_02]: you're in the wrong yeah and can this

[00:51:00] [SPEAKER_02]: isn't who you are and it gets like I had

[00:51:02] [SPEAKER_02]: the power Obi-Wan's like fine okay

[00:51:04] [SPEAKER_02]: this is what's fucking going on great

[00:51:06] [SPEAKER_02]: then I'm I will show no restraint

[00:51:08] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah dramatically takes out his lightsaber

[00:51:10] [SPEAKER_02]: and then it's like a fucking boss level

[00:51:12] [SPEAKER_01]: video game they fight

[00:51:14] [SPEAKER_01]: I mean we said we've talked about you he chokes

[00:51:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Padme half to death oh right

[00:51:18] [SPEAKER_02]: he gets so angry that he thinks

[00:51:20] [SPEAKER_01]: at the woman he turned to the dark side

[00:51:22] [SPEAKER_01]: to protect not an hour ago

[00:51:24] [SPEAKER_01]: he murdered children

[00:51:26] [SPEAKER_02]: so that his explicitly

[00:51:28] [SPEAKER_02]: for the purpose of saving

[00:51:30] [SPEAKER_02]: her life and end the life of his

[00:51:32] [SPEAKER_02]: on-board child yeah right arguably

[00:51:34] [SPEAKER_02]: that's that's the key child ren

[00:51:36] [SPEAKER_02]: by the way we should

[00:51:37] [SPEAKER_02]: he didn't know don't jump don't jump the gun

[00:51:40] [SPEAKER_02]: you're being a bit of an Obi-Wan on the ship right now

[00:51:42] [SPEAKER_02]: okay he

[00:51:44] [SPEAKER_02]: likes kids so much he thinks his kids

[00:51:46] [SPEAKER_02]: are gonna die and he's like I'll kill

[00:51:48] [SPEAKER_02]: as many kids as I need to make sure my kids live

[00:51:51] [SPEAKER_02]: then he thinks

[00:51:53] [SPEAKER_02]: oh wait

[00:51:54] [SPEAKER_02]: you've been hanging out with Obi-Wan lately

[00:51:56] [SPEAKER_02]: which is like these are the things my 17 year old

[00:51:58] [SPEAKER_02]: sister calls me about

[00:52:00] [SPEAKER_02]: oh my friend my friend sent

[00:52:02] [SPEAKER_02]: an email a mass email to everyone

[00:52:04] [SPEAKER_02]: telling them that I suck because I talked

[00:52:06] [SPEAKER_02]: to the boy that she likes

[00:52:09] [SPEAKER_02]: like that's essentially what Anakin's

[00:52:10] [SPEAKER_02]: doing he gets so angry about

[00:52:12] [SPEAKER_02]: this yeah that

[00:52:14] [SPEAKER_02]: if you start choking Obi-Wan we'd be

[00:52:16] [SPEAKER_02]: like that's kind of in line with the way he's been

[00:52:18] [SPEAKER_02]: acting for the last 40 minutes

[00:52:20] [SPEAKER_02]: from to chocking Padme makes no sense

[00:52:22] [SPEAKER_02]: chokes Padme out and it's not like he has the moment

[00:52:24] [SPEAKER_02]: where he's like what am I doing no no he just

[00:52:26] [SPEAKER_01]: she drops and he's like it's your fall Obi-Wan

[00:52:29] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah fuck you they have

[00:52:30] [SPEAKER_01]: a big lightsaber fight

[00:52:32] [SPEAKER_02]: and another keep on harping on the same but like

[00:52:34] [SPEAKER_02]: the video game analogy I made

[00:52:36] [SPEAKER_02]: last week you know how in a boss

[00:52:38] [SPEAKER_02]: level it's like okay here's the health

[00:52:40] [SPEAKER_02]: meter of how much health

[00:52:42] [SPEAKER_02]: the boss has yeah and

[00:52:44] [SPEAKER_02]: then when the health meter goes down like a third of the way

[00:52:46] [SPEAKER_02]: then it goes to a short cut

[00:52:48] [SPEAKER_01]: scene where like at a new stage of the boss

[00:52:50] [SPEAKER_02]: right yeah and it's like okay you're still

[00:52:52] [SPEAKER_02]: at the same level of health and you have to keep on going

[00:52:54] [SPEAKER_02]: down this is structured like that where it's

[00:52:56] [SPEAKER_02]: like a third of the fight and then they're like

[00:52:58] [SPEAKER_02]: okay now we're on a bridge yeah they

[00:53:00] [SPEAKER_01]: fight in like the the the

[00:53:02] [SPEAKER_02]: meeting room and Anakin flubbers up

[00:53:04] [SPEAKER_02]: to a bridge and then Obi-Wan has to chase him

[00:53:06] [SPEAKER_02]: and then the fight now has a different fighting and they have

[00:53:08] [SPEAKER_01]: a bridge fight and then they kind of fight

[00:53:10] [SPEAKER_01]: just sort of swing at each other on this

[00:53:12] [SPEAKER_01]: kind of telephone

[00:53:14] [SPEAKER_01]: pole that's falling into the lava yeah

[00:53:16] [SPEAKER_01]: and they fight on these two

[00:53:18] [SPEAKER_01]: little like lava cars

[00:53:20] [SPEAKER_01]: that are perched on the lava with force fields

[00:53:22] [SPEAKER_01]: like robot coasters it's that's the worst part

[00:53:24] [SPEAKER_01]: and then and I really

[00:53:26] [SPEAKER_01]: just want to talk about this now because it drives me so crazy

[00:53:28] [SPEAKER_01]: I just want to say one thing quite okay

[00:53:31] [SPEAKER_02]: I understand

[00:53:32] [SPEAKER_02]: that this fight is serious for the two of them

[00:53:35] [SPEAKER_02]: and that

[00:53:36] [SPEAKER_02]: when surrounded by lava there's an easy

[00:53:38] [SPEAKER_02]: like sort of checkmate move

[00:53:40] [SPEAKER_02]: taking someone down which is like push

[00:53:42] [SPEAKER_02]: you into the lava but they keep on

[00:53:44] [SPEAKER_02]: putting themselves into the most dangerous position

[00:53:46] [SPEAKER_02]: why wouldn't they be like you know let's just go back

[00:53:48] [SPEAKER_02]: to that platform we were on at the beginning

[00:53:50] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah that was actually the solid ground

[00:53:52] [SPEAKER_02]: it's just about fucking lightsabers and the lava will come

[00:53:54] [SPEAKER_01]: around it'll sort of crest around us very

[00:53:56] [SPEAKER_01]: exciting because right now I might just slip

[00:53:58] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah seriously I might just fall

[00:54:00] [SPEAKER_01]: well they had that moment where they kind of do like

[00:54:02] [SPEAKER_01]: opposing force pushes and they're

[00:54:04] [SPEAKER_02]: sort of like

[00:54:07] [SPEAKER_02]: nope nope let's go to a safer

[00:54:08] [SPEAKER_02]: space anyway it's equivalent

[00:54:10] [SPEAKER_02]: of being in a bar and going like okay let's take this

[00:54:12] [SPEAKER_01]: outside well don't get blood in the body I should watch it again

[00:54:14] [SPEAKER_01]: now to see but maybe it's like each time

[00:54:16] [SPEAKER_01]: one of them sort of jumps to the next spot

[00:54:18] [SPEAKER_01]: in an effort to get an advantage

[00:54:20] [SPEAKER_01]: you know and then it doesn't work

[00:54:22] [SPEAKER_01]: anyway they're on the lava cars

[00:54:24] [SPEAKER_01]: they're on the lava coasters

[00:54:26] [SPEAKER_01]: there'll be one

[00:54:27] [SPEAKER_01]: jumps off onto

[00:54:30] [SPEAKER_01]: just the ground onto the beach head

[00:54:32] [SPEAKER_01]: basically yeah but like really like

[00:54:34] [SPEAKER_02]: the shore like right like right on

[00:54:37] [SPEAKER_02]: it the the lava waves are cresting

[00:54:39] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah right he's right crashing

[00:54:41] [SPEAKER_01]: their lava sand dollars three feet

[00:54:43] [SPEAKER_01]: up the coast yeah

[00:54:45] [SPEAKER_01]: three feet up on the ground right and he says

[00:54:47] [SPEAKER_01]: to Anakin like it's over I have the high ground

[00:54:49] [SPEAKER_01]: okay now you want to harp on it's crazy

[00:54:51] [SPEAKER_01]: what is he talking about this has never

[00:54:53] [SPEAKER_01]: been mentioned before they're magical

[00:54:54] [SPEAKER_01]: wizards with swords yeah anyone can do

[00:54:57] [SPEAKER_02]: anything he why doesn't it can just jump

[00:54:59] [SPEAKER_02]: over like a little bit over there and

[00:55:01] [SPEAKER_02]: then run it oh you mean pull a flubber like he's been doing this

[00:55:03] [SPEAKER_02]: whole fucking movie he doesn't even need to pull

[00:55:05] [SPEAKER_02]: flubber he's on a space coaster he's on a

[00:55:07] [SPEAKER_02]: lava coaster just drive it left

[00:55:09] [SPEAKER_02]: just go hey can we go higher than him

[00:55:11] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah actually that would be funny

[00:55:13] [SPEAKER_02]: was if you went on the lava coaster and he was

[00:55:15] [SPEAKER_02]: like I have a higher ground and nobody was like

[00:55:16] [SPEAKER_02]: I have a higher ground and it was like just

[00:55:19] [SPEAKER_02]: the two of them trying to get higher than

[00:55:21] [SPEAKER_02]: each other into space

[00:55:23] [SPEAKER_01]: where Anakin like goes down the coast

[00:55:25] [SPEAKER_01]: nobody wants like starts running me no

[00:55:26] [SPEAKER_01]: so go to the high ground anyway

[00:55:29] [SPEAKER_01]: apparently even though Anakin is

[00:55:31] [SPEAKER_01]: the most powerful Jedi imaginable

[00:55:33] [SPEAKER_01]: he's really bad at jumping over Obi-Wan has the high ground

[00:55:35] [SPEAKER_01]: and so Anakin's like

[00:55:37] [SPEAKER_01]: my powers are so great and Obi-Wan's like

[00:55:39] [SPEAKER_01]: don't you do it Anakin well do you interpret him

[00:55:41] [SPEAKER_01]: as that or do you interpret it as like

[00:55:43] [SPEAKER_01]: I think Anakin said something along the lines of like

[00:55:45] [SPEAKER_01]: you don't even know how powerful I am now

[00:55:47] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah because the high ground thing

[00:55:49] [SPEAKER_02]: it's not like those are like the rules of

[00:55:51] [SPEAKER_02]: dueling it's it's sort of him being like

[00:55:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Anakin you can't beat me from this standpoint

[00:55:55] [SPEAKER_02]: right so just fucking give up

[00:55:57] [SPEAKER_01]: which makes it just makes no sense to me

[00:55:59] [SPEAKER_01]: no I don't understand it but

[00:56:01] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin tries to jump over Obi-Wan

[00:56:03] [SPEAKER_01]: jump over him he has

[00:56:05] [SPEAKER_01]: a sword not not the way to

[00:56:07] [SPEAKER_01]: Obi-Wan literally just kind of goes like

[00:56:08] [SPEAKER_01]: it just kind of swipes

[00:56:11] [SPEAKER_01]: the sword overhead chops off Anakin's legs

[00:56:14] [SPEAKER_02]: oh why you just jump

[00:56:15] [SPEAKER_02]: in front of him just jump anywhere else

[00:56:17] [SPEAKER_02]: jump anywhere why over him no right

[00:56:19] [SPEAKER_02]: so he tries to jump on top of his head

[00:56:22] [SPEAKER_02]: and Obi-Wan

[00:56:23] [SPEAKER_02]: Obi-Wan swipes his legs off like a fly swatter

[00:56:25] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah cut some clean off at the knees

[00:56:27] [SPEAKER_01]: Anakin is left

[00:56:28] [SPEAKER_01]: on the ground

[00:56:30] [SPEAKER_01]: and he starts burning up because he's so close to the lava

[00:56:33] [SPEAKER_01]: oh oh no no no hold on

[00:56:35] [SPEAKER_01]: hold on

[00:56:36] [SPEAKER_01]: go ahead my friend refers it to like

[00:56:38] [SPEAKER_01]: me basically it's like a Monty Python

[00:56:40] [SPEAKER_01]: as the black knight yeah exactly

[00:56:42] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah because he's only got one limb at this point

[00:56:44] [SPEAKER_02]: he's only got the left arm and he's still crawling towards him

[00:56:46] [SPEAKER_02]: and he's like got the look of determination

[00:56:47] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah I'm gonna get ya right and Obi-Wan starts yelling

[00:56:50] [SPEAKER_01]: like you were the chosen one

[00:56:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and you were supposed to bring balance to the force

[00:56:54] [SPEAKER_01]: not end it how could you do this

[00:56:56] [SPEAKER_02]: this is the most emotional scene I'd say in any of the three movies

[00:56:59] [SPEAKER_01]: it's well played by

[00:57:01] [SPEAKER_01]: I think it is a good scene

[00:57:03] [SPEAKER_01]: it's a good

[00:57:04] [SPEAKER_01]: speech like he finally has

[00:57:06] [SPEAKER_01]: something to sink his teeth into he's finally allowed

[00:57:08] [SPEAKER_01]: to cut loose emotionally which he doesn't do

[00:57:10] [SPEAKER_01]: after like you know

[00:57:11] [SPEAKER_01]: served up a platter of dead children

[00:57:13] [SPEAKER_02]: for this one scene they trick you

[00:57:16] [SPEAKER_02]: into forgetting that they didn't

[00:57:18] [SPEAKER_02]: earn this right they didn't do any

[00:57:20] [SPEAKER_02]: of the scenes to build to this properly

[00:57:21] [SPEAKER_02]: but the idea that Obi-Wan has invested this much time

[00:57:24] [SPEAKER_02]: and energy into this child because he believed

[00:57:26] [SPEAKER_02]: that he was going to become something

[00:57:28] [SPEAKER_02]: which it felt like was kind of dropped for

[00:57:30] [SPEAKER_02]: a movie and a half that is what

[00:57:32] [SPEAKER_01]: happens at the end of the first movie that's why Obi-Wan takes him on

[00:57:35] [SPEAKER_02]: right but then like they didn't really talk about the chosen one

[00:57:37] [SPEAKER_02]: shit quite gone

[00:57:38] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah

[00:57:40] [SPEAKER_02]: and and and he's he's like really

[00:57:42] [SPEAKER_02]: heartbroken by yeah and he's like

[00:57:44] [SPEAKER_01]: look I mean look at you now you're just a sad

[00:57:46] [SPEAKER_01]: mess I hate that I had to do this

[00:57:48] [SPEAKER_01]: and it can mean what I was like I hate

[00:57:50] [SPEAKER_01]: you

[00:57:51] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah burning up

[00:57:52] [SPEAKER_02]: hair goes I know I hate you too

[00:57:55] [SPEAKER_02]: we each other it's clear we just fought

[00:57:57] [SPEAKER_02]: on lava we don't like each other and it

[00:57:59] [SPEAKER_01]: can won't let he's I hate you and he's

[00:58:01] [SPEAKER_02]: crawling with one arm

[00:58:03] [SPEAKER_02]: and now is like his skin is

[00:58:05] [SPEAKER_02]: like is really pale

[00:58:06] [SPEAKER_02]: and his eyes are going even more red okay

[00:58:09] [SPEAKER_02]: for the last 40 minutes I start

[00:58:10] [SPEAKER_01]: going no fucking return to cat eyes

[00:58:13] [SPEAKER_02]: okay so he's crawling very

[00:58:15] [SPEAKER_02]: slowly he's not making a lot of progress because

[00:58:17] [SPEAKER_01]: it got one rub it on he's got one human

[00:58:19] [SPEAKER_01]: arm I think the robot arm might be gone or something

[00:58:21] [SPEAKER_01]: maybe it's not it's just not working very well

[00:58:23] [SPEAKER_02]: got this pump it's crispy whatever right

[00:58:25] [SPEAKER_02]: it's crispy and then because the lava

[00:58:27] [SPEAKER_02]: waves are like crashing up on

[00:58:29] [SPEAKER_02]: the shore and he's still right on the shore

[00:58:32] [SPEAKER_02]: the waves crash

[00:58:33] [SPEAKER_02]: and like a piece of lava

[00:58:35] [SPEAKER_02]: falls on his back and his whole body catches

[00:58:37] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah he just catches on fire it's not just close to

[00:58:39] [SPEAKER_02]: it it's like no I know see visually

[00:58:41] [SPEAKER_02]: defined yeah a blob of lava

[00:58:43] [SPEAKER_02]: land on him

[00:58:45] [SPEAKER_02]: up he goes up in smoke and now he's on fire

[00:58:47] [SPEAKER_02]: and he's screaming and he's like still crawling

[00:58:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and Obi-Wan's like dude you're on fire

[00:58:50] [SPEAKER_01]: and apparently this is the scene that earned their PG-13

[00:58:52] [SPEAKER_01]: rating by the way it's that

[00:58:54] [SPEAKER_01]: that whole sequence not the scene where he murders children

[00:58:57] [SPEAKER_01]: it's off screen we forgot to mention

[00:59:00] [SPEAKER_01]: Robin Williams murders so many children in Flubber

[00:59:02] [SPEAKER_02]: it's just off screen so it gets that G

[00:59:04] [SPEAKER_02]: rating that's true yeah

[00:59:06] [SPEAKER_02]: and Jacob the liar too

[00:59:08] [SPEAKER_02]: I haven't seen Jacob the liar he played Hitler in that right

[00:59:11] [SPEAKER_02]: it's terrible Jake

[00:59:13] [SPEAKER_02]: no time for bits

[00:59:14] [SPEAKER_02]: no time for bits

[00:59:16] [SPEAKER_02]: come on come on

[00:59:17] [SPEAKER_02]: there's a scene that we breeze over

[00:59:20] [SPEAKER_02]: that should be the most

[00:59:22] [SPEAKER_02]: cathartic and exciting film across these

[00:59:24] [SPEAKER_02]: three films scene across these

[00:59:26] [SPEAKER_01]: film across these

[00:59:28] [SPEAKER_02]: go on what's the scene what should be the most

[00:59:30] [SPEAKER_02]: exciting and cathartic scene across

[00:59:32] [SPEAKER_02]: these three films is a non-endear

[00:59:34] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know what scene you mean Anakin

[00:59:36] [SPEAKER_02]: killing the Neimoidians

[00:59:38] [SPEAKER_02]: I know goes in their

[00:59:40] [SPEAKER_02]: office closes the door they cut away

[00:59:42] [SPEAKER_02]: I know it's you see him

[00:59:44] [SPEAKER_02]: cut one of them they cut back later

[00:59:46] [SPEAKER_02]: back to it right that's right and you mostly see

[00:59:48] [SPEAKER_01]: him killing battle droids

[00:59:50] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah but new gun rays still alive

[00:59:52] [SPEAKER_01]: and he's like begging for mercy basically

[00:59:54] [SPEAKER_02]: and he sort of like scrapes his chest

[00:59:55] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah he kind of just sort of vaguely slices

[00:59:58] [SPEAKER_02]: him down in a movie where he saw dooku's

[01:00:00] [SPEAKER_02]: head fall off I know we're seeing droids get caught

[01:00:02] [SPEAKER_02]: in half I want to see I really are the guys

[01:00:04] [SPEAKER_01]: I want to see cut up because they're

[01:00:06] [SPEAKER_01]: responsible for everything bad in the first

[01:00:08] [SPEAKER_01]: movie in the second movie he's really creepy

[01:00:10] [SPEAKER_01]: and like really wants to see Padme in the live

[01:00:12] [SPEAKER_01]: he's really a nasty piece of work yes

[01:00:13] [SPEAKER_01]: second movie the third movie it is so

[01:00:16] [SPEAKER_01]: delicious that they finally think they've

[01:00:18] [SPEAKER_01]: won yeah they think they got it and

[01:00:20] [SPEAKER_01]: that cities is like sure sure sure know

[01:00:22] [SPEAKER_01]: that lava planet that I hang out on

[01:00:24] [SPEAKER_01]: sometimes just just just my meeting room

[01:00:26] [SPEAKER_01]: there yeah gonna send my guy and he

[01:00:28] [SPEAKER_01]: just chops into pieces and we don't get to see

[01:00:29] [SPEAKER_01]: it's really annoying yeah I want I want

[01:00:31] [SPEAKER_02]: fucking blood and guts yeah aside from

[01:00:34] [SPEAKER_02]: everything you just said about why

[01:00:35] [SPEAKER_02]: they suck within the reality of this film

[01:00:37] [SPEAKER_02]: in the reality of our world they're just

[01:00:39] [SPEAKER_02]: fucking the worst ugly racist caricatures

[01:00:43] [SPEAKER_02]: we want to see some course correction

[01:00:45] [SPEAKER_02]: some course slice them up course on

[01:00:47] [SPEAKER_01]: correction those it's it's really do you

[01:00:51] [SPEAKER_01]: think they sell croissants and course of

[01:00:52] [SPEAKER_01]: course they do some course on course

[01:00:53] [SPEAKER_01]: on croissant yeah um the whole thing is

[01:00:57] [SPEAKER_01]: a bomber let's not forget that once he

[01:00:58] [SPEAKER_01]: said on fire obi one's also kind of like

[01:01:00] [SPEAKER_01]: alright I'm going he doesn't think so

[01:01:03] [SPEAKER_01]: like maybe just sort of just double

[01:01:05] [SPEAKER_01]: check that Anakin's dead well okay

[01:01:07] [SPEAKER_01]: before we get to the end do you think

[01:01:08] [SPEAKER_01]: he's like he just doesn't have the heart

[01:01:11] [SPEAKER_01]: to kill him is that maybe what it is

[01:01:12] [SPEAKER_02]: don't do fucking do diligence in this

[01:01:14] [SPEAKER_02]: movie really don't they don't think hey

[01:01:16] [SPEAKER_01]: they don't do research they don't ask

[01:01:19] [SPEAKER_01]: they don't they don't fucking you know

[01:01:21] [SPEAKER_01]: what maybe it's just that vengeance is

[01:01:23] [SPEAKER_01]: just is not very Jedi and so he's

[01:01:25] [SPEAKER_01]: like look I've incapacitated you so

[01:01:28] [SPEAKER_01]: that's that he gets on the ship he

[01:01:31] [SPEAKER_01]: leaves he had me deliver her babies

[01:01:33] [SPEAKER_01]: we'll talk about that another time I'm

[01:01:34] [SPEAKER_02]: not surprised that Obi-Wan doesn't

[01:01:37] [SPEAKER_02]: kill Anakin I'm surprised he doesn't in

[01:01:40] [SPEAKER_02]: this hobbled state take him bring him

[01:01:43] [SPEAKER_02]: back to be trying to rescue him try to

[01:01:45] [SPEAKER_02]: rehab him or arrest or whatever the fuck

[01:01:47] [SPEAKER_02]: it is you know just leaves him there

[01:01:49] [SPEAKER_02]: just make sure in some way or another

[01:01:51] [SPEAKER_02]: you're on top right do you have a

[01:01:53] [SPEAKER_02]: merchandise spotlight have a murder

[01:01:55] [SPEAKER_01]: panicking much and I was gonna ask

[01:01:57] [SPEAKER_01]: if there's a young wing massacre

[01:01:58] [SPEAKER_01]: merchandise they made some of the kids

[01:02:02] [SPEAKER_02]: there's you know that one scene

[01:02:03] [SPEAKER_02]: where uh uh

[01:02:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Bayloriana played by the great Jimmy

[01:02:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Smith goes to the and there's the kid who

[01:02:11] [SPEAKER_01]: sort of valiantly fights off some clone

[01:02:13] [SPEAKER_01]: troopers and then dies and so we're at

[01:02:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Jimmy Smith is like yeah that we're

[01:02:18] [SPEAKER_02]: right so we've seen all these kids get

[01:02:19] [SPEAKER_02]: killed we think all of them are dead

[01:02:21] [SPEAKER_02]: then Jimmy Smith gets there he's

[01:02:24] [SPEAKER_02]: trying to get out the fucking clone

[01:02:25] [SPEAKER_02]: troopers are trying to shoot at him

[01:02:27] [SPEAKER_02]: this little boy comes out protects him

[01:02:29] [SPEAKER_02]: dies in the process and it's like a

[01:02:31] [SPEAKER_02]: weird scene you're like why would they

[01:02:33] [SPEAKER_02]: put this into the movie the kids just

[01:02:35] [SPEAKER_02]: doing crazy space karate

[01:02:38] [SPEAKER_02]: that kid is is played by George Lucas

[01:02:40] [SPEAKER_02]: oh really who is really into karate

[01:02:45] [SPEAKER_02]: and so George wrote the scene to the

[01:02:47] [SPEAKER_02]: movie so he could do his that's very

[01:02:48] [SPEAKER_01]: martial arts although it's a little

[01:02:50] [SPEAKER_01]: weird that George Lucas is like you

[01:02:52] [SPEAKER_01]: will have to die on screen yeah but

[01:02:55] [SPEAKER_01]: you die a martyr uh you die with

[01:02:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Smith's going no yeah no no one's

[01:03:01] [SPEAKER_02]: happy about the fact that you're dying

[01:03:02] [SPEAKER_02]: no here's here's here's the crispy

[01:03:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and I can actually oh this is terrible

[01:03:07] [SPEAKER_01]: it doesn't he doesn't look crispy he

[01:03:09] [SPEAKER_01]: just kind of looks hairless yeah and

[01:03:11] [SPEAKER_01]: covered in mud yeah he looks he's got

[01:03:14] [SPEAKER_02]: a robot arm he looks like the I am

[01:03:16] [SPEAKER_02]: legend Rubbitts I think his legs are

[01:03:18] [SPEAKER_02]: removable they're not robots and I am

[01:03:19] [SPEAKER_02]: much the movie's not about Rubbitts

[01:03:22] [SPEAKER_02]: I gotta rewatch that movie oh boy

[01:03:26] [SPEAKER_02]: this is terrible well okay so it doesn't

[01:03:29] [SPEAKER_02]: look like Anakin's face uh yeah no it

[01:03:31] [SPEAKER_02]: doesn't here this well that's

[01:03:34] [SPEAKER_02]: there yeah who's it look like it looks

[01:03:35] [SPEAKER_02]: like this I mean this is what what

[01:03:37] [SPEAKER_02]: kid wants to play with it this is a

[01:03:40] [SPEAKER_02]: broken toy it's a broken toy to remind

[01:03:43] [SPEAKER_02]: you of how everything in the world is

[01:03:44] [SPEAKER_02]: terrible and everyone you love will hurt

[01:03:46] [SPEAKER_02]: you and then we'll get hurt in the

[01:03:49] [SPEAKER_02]: process it's just this is just a

[01:03:51] [SPEAKER_02]: plastic representation of misery

[01:03:54] [SPEAKER_02]: wow but it comes

[01:03:55] [SPEAKER_02]: with a cloak so you can turn them back

[01:03:58] [SPEAKER_02]: into regular Anakin oh you put the cloak

[01:04:01] [SPEAKER_02]: on top of the weird yeah

[01:04:04] [SPEAKER_01]: huh anyway let's just finish up we're

[01:04:08] [SPEAKER_01]: almost I we just got a wrap up the final

[01:04:10] [SPEAKER_01]: thing that happens to Anakin because

[01:04:11] [SPEAKER_01]: wait we really have to talk about it

[01:04:12] [SPEAKER_01]: because this is kind of it's it's both

[01:04:15] [SPEAKER_01]: cool and also sort of just a bit of a

[01:04:18] [SPEAKER_01]: flat you know from no me filmmaking

[01:04:20] [SPEAKER_02]: perspective this is maybe the one

[01:04:23] [SPEAKER_01]: scene I love okay so until a certain

[01:04:28] [SPEAKER_01]: point yeah okay Anakin gets rescued by

[01:04:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Palpatine help us in just like stops by

[01:04:33] [SPEAKER_02]: once again yeah he like a cab yes your

[01:04:36] [SPEAKER_02]: style yeah how do you find me first

[01:04:38] [SPEAKER_01]: place I look I was something the force

[01:04:41] [SPEAKER_01]: the force the force it's always the

[01:04:43] [SPEAKER_01]: answer the force I felt it in the

[01:04:44] [SPEAKER_01]: force okay he takes Anakin to his I

[01:04:47] [SPEAKER_01]: don't know surgery room has a bunch of

[01:04:49] [SPEAKER_01]: rabbits some robots put robot stuff all

[01:04:52] [SPEAKER_01]: over Anakin he gets robot legs yeah

[01:04:54] [SPEAKER_01]: he gets a robot like chess plate

[01:04:56] [SPEAKER_01]: okay now here he gets a robot helmet

[01:04:58] [SPEAKER_02]: now here's what's interesting okay like

[01:05:02] [SPEAKER_02]: grievous well you know when we see him

[01:05:04] [SPEAKER_02]: in close-up and he's got the flesh

[01:05:05] [SPEAKER_02]: he's got some flesh around the eyes it

[01:05:07] [SPEAKER_02]: comes across like he was perhaps not a

[01:05:10] [SPEAKER_02]: human some type of organic being of

[01:05:12] [SPEAKER_02]: some sort that over time was turned to

[01:05:14] [SPEAKER_02]: a cyborg and he looks like a rabbit

[01:05:16] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah the rabbit overwhelms right sure

[01:05:19] [SPEAKER_02]: they're putting all these rubber

[01:05:20] [SPEAKER_02]: parts on Anakin he just looks like a

[01:05:23] [SPEAKER_02]: guy but then they put a suit over

[01:05:25] [SPEAKER_02]: it yeah so you don't even know what

[01:05:27] [SPEAKER_02]: this fucking thing is they put this very

[01:05:29] [SPEAKER_01]: retro yeah yeah with like blinking

[01:05:32] [SPEAKER_01]: beeps and boops lights like almost like

[01:05:34] [SPEAKER_01]: pleated leather it's crazy you know

[01:05:37] [SPEAKER_01]: daddy suit it's like a big daddy suit

[01:05:39] [SPEAKER_01]: but it's like this big hulking suit it's

[01:05:41] [SPEAKER_01]: got these like robot overlays on the

[01:05:43] [SPEAKER_01]: eyes you know it's got like a whole

[01:05:45] [SPEAKER_01]: heads up display well this is the

[01:05:46] [SPEAKER_02]: sequence I like that I think the

[01:05:47] [SPEAKER_02]: construction of this is kind of

[01:05:49] [SPEAKER_02]: terrifying in a successful way it's

[01:05:52] [SPEAKER_02]: it's a creepy sequence and there's a

[01:05:55] [SPEAKER_02]: you know a really good series of shots

[01:06:01] [SPEAKER_02]: in a row yeah where we see from Anakin's

[01:06:04] [SPEAKER_02]: percent we see his burnt face and they're

[01:06:06] [SPEAKER_02]: lowering the thing on we see from his

[01:06:07] [SPEAKER_02]: perspective the mask coming down the

[01:06:10] [SPEAKER_02]: lighting robot cop vision in the

[01:06:12] [SPEAKER_02]: lenses and all of that and then it

[01:06:13] [SPEAKER_02]: comes on and there's this really cool

[01:06:15] [SPEAKER_02]: shot that is just his head sideways

[01:06:19] [SPEAKER_02]: sure across the frame as the helmet

[01:06:22] [SPEAKER_02]: comes on and then you just hear the

[01:06:23] [SPEAKER_02]: breathing you hear this sort of deep

[01:06:25] [SPEAKER_02]: robotic breathing yeah we got to describe

[01:06:26] [SPEAKER_02]: this very very very eerie yeah it's cool

[01:06:30] [SPEAKER_02]: like these movies have been doing so

[01:06:32] [SPEAKER_02]: much overkill you know to get things

[01:06:35] [SPEAKER_02]: across and it's like oh there's like

[01:06:36] [SPEAKER_02]: silence is powerful like just hearing

[01:06:39] [SPEAKER_02]: someone breathe somehow is very unnerving

[01:06:42] [SPEAKER_02]: and it's like this is a very different

[01:06:44] [SPEAKER_02]: type of trick than we know from Georgie

[01:06:46] [SPEAKER_02]: for G. Lucas it's crazy it's effective

[01:06:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and this helmet we got to say I mean

[01:06:50] [SPEAKER_01]: is a beaut it's great it's shiny it's

[01:06:53] [SPEAKER_02]: shiny but it's also it is both you know

[01:06:56] [SPEAKER_02]: it has a nose it has eyes and his cheekbones

[01:06:59] [SPEAKER_02]: that has a mouth type feature but it

[01:07:00] [SPEAKER_02]: also looks very inhuman you can't tell

[01:07:02] [SPEAKER_02]: if it's a robot you can't tell if it's

[01:07:03] [SPEAKER_02]: an alien can't help it's a person it

[01:07:05] [SPEAKER_02]: reminds one of like old like mask theater

[01:07:08] [SPEAKER_02]: principles were able to project so much

[01:07:10] [SPEAKER_02]: onto it and it becomes so scary because

[01:07:12] [SPEAKER_02]: it is both like very expressive and

[01:07:15] [SPEAKER_02]: very featureless at the same time and

[01:07:17] [SPEAKER_02]: this helmet comes down to the room

[01:07:18] [SPEAKER_02]: with any of the breathing starts the

[01:07:20] [SPEAKER_02]: design of this fucking thing they tilt

[01:07:21] [SPEAKER_02]: the table up you see Darth Vader and

[01:07:24] [SPEAKER_02]: full glory and this guy looks fucking

[01:07:26] [SPEAKER_02]: unbelievable it's weird because scary

[01:07:29] [SPEAKER_02]: the voice is fucking Academy Award nominee

[01:07:32] [SPEAKER_02]: James Earl Jones is the voice deep tones

[01:07:36] [SPEAKER_01]: the deep sonorous tones of James Earl

[01:07:38] [SPEAKER_01]: Jones he's an old man it's kind of

[01:07:40] [SPEAKER_02]: raspy breathing his trotty he's like

[01:07:42] [SPEAKER_01]: trying to calibrate the voice bossa

[01:07:44] [SPEAKER_01]: himself I mean this is kind of great

[01:07:47] [SPEAKER_01]: one of the best voice actors in his

[01:07:49] [SPEAKER_01]: of all time and it's weird because like

[01:07:53] [SPEAKER_01]: you're saying it is kind of Darth Vader

[01:07:54] [SPEAKER_01]: and all his glory but also it's like

[01:07:55] [SPEAKER_01]: this is actually kind of like Darth

[01:07:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Vader all fucked up right like this is

[01:07:59] [SPEAKER_01]: sort of like the best they can do to

[01:08:00] [SPEAKER_01]: salvage Darth Vader that's what I like

[01:08:02] [SPEAKER_02]: about it I like it too what I like is

[01:08:04] [SPEAKER_02]: that it's like this very depressing

[01:08:06] [SPEAKER_02]: moment it's very scary and when the

[01:08:08] [SPEAKER_02]: helmet comes on and the table til top

[01:08:10] [SPEAKER_02]: it's like oh he's officially gone

[01:08:12] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah that's the way the film sang to

[01:08:14] [SPEAKER_02]: you like if you were looking at

[01:08:15] [SPEAKER_02]: crispy Anakin for the rest of the movie

[01:08:17] [SPEAKER_02]: or if you were as restored in a grievous

[01:08:19] [SPEAKER_02]: style you know we're still parts of it

[01:08:21] [SPEAKER_02]: or whatever you'd be like okay that

[01:08:22] [SPEAKER_02]: doesn't look like a little boy and I

[01:08:23] [SPEAKER_02]: can because it was a different fucking

[01:08:24] [SPEAKER_02]: actor and it doesn't look like a Christian

[01:08:25] [SPEAKER_02]: because it got a lot of makeup on it's

[01:08:27] [SPEAKER_02]: still like humanoid you look at Darth

[01:08:29] [SPEAKER_02]: Vader and it's like that's just a

[01:08:30] [SPEAKER_02]: mystery yeah this is totally emotionally

[01:08:32] [SPEAKER_02]: removed from what we saw the evil

[01:08:34] [SPEAKER_02]: of the dark side of the force has

[01:08:36] [SPEAKER_02]: corrupt him so thoroughly there is no

[01:08:38] [SPEAKER_02]: semblance of that man left in

[01:08:40] [SPEAKER_02]: whatever this thing is yeah and now

[01:08:42] [SPEAKER_02]: we have James Earl Jones a master

[01:08:44] [SPEAKER_02]: actor delivering dialogue instead of

[01:08:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Hayden Christiansen we've traded up

[01:08:48] [SPEAKER_02]: oh boy this is exciting guess what

[01:08:50] [SPEAKER_02]: there's three minutes left in the movie

[01:08:51] [SPEAKER_01]: I know and he has two lines and it's

[01:08:53] [SPEAKER_01]: basically like where's Padme and

[01:08:55] [SPEAKER_01]: Palpatine's like unfortunately she

[01:08:57] [SPEAKER_01]: died and he's like but you know what

[01:09:01] [SPEAKER_01]: he falls to his knees and screams no

[01:09:03] [SPEAKER_01]: no he pulls himself out of the

[01:09:05] [SPEAKER_01]: surgery chair he forces the whole

[01:09:07] [SPEAKER_01]: room everything starts shaking and

[01:09:09] [SPEAKER_01]: jizzing around and then he goes it

[01:09:11] [SPEAKER_01]: is jizzing around your right come is

[01:09:12] [SPEAKER_01]: propelling the objects around the

[01:09:14] [SPEAKER_01]: room and like Palpatine's just like

[01:09:15] [SPEAKER_01]: and he loves it yeah he's happy I

[01:09:19] [SPEAKER_01]: guess he's upset he likes chaos and

[01:09:21] [SPEAKER_01]: then he's like no which I remember at

[01:09:25] [SPEAKER_01]: the time everyone was really worked up

[01:09:27] [SPEAKER_01]: about how bad it is he's gonna use that

[01:09:29] [SPEAKER_00]: anger it's very cheese gonna use the

[01:09:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Darth Vader's anger it's like oh

[01:09:33] [SPEAKER_02]: his weapon the scene was really kind

[01:09:36] [SPEAKER_02]: of perfect up until that point I would

[01:09:38] [SPEAKER_01]: argue it if not perfect very very

[01:09:42] [SPEAKER_01]: much better than very effective and

[01:09:46] [SPEAKER_01]: actually and also you're like I want to

[01:09:50] [SPEAKER_01]: see this guy do stuff it evokes this

[01:09:52] [SPEAKER_02]: robot guy evokes emotional responses you

[01:09:55] [SPEAKER_02]: know you're afraid it's a suit he's

[01:09:58] [SPEAKER_02]: wearing your sad CGI yeah oh it's very

[01:10:01] [SPEAKER_00]: practical the helmet to the helmet is

[01:10:05] [SPEAKER_01]: on the head yeah because I want helmet

[01:10:08] [SPEAKER_01]: did you know the heading Christensen

[01:10:09] [SPEAKER_01]: almost didn't and then insisted that

[01:10:12] [SPEAKER_01]: he won't want to they put him in the

[01:10:14] [SPEAKER_01]: suit they put lifts on it to his

[01:10:15] [SPEAKER_01]: hair usually is yeah he's like hey no

[01:10:18] [SPEAKER_01]: like they were just I guess gonna put a

[01:10:19] [SPEAKER_01]: stunt guy in the suit or something yeah

[01:10:20] [SPEAKER_01]: he was like I need to be in the fucking

[01:10:22] [SPEAKER_02]: suit yeah so the design was like this is

[01:10:25] [SPEAKER_02]: the best looking thing in all three of

[01:10:27] [SPEAKER_01]: these movies and then it's like okay

[01:10:29] [SPEAKER_01]: well now directed by George Lucas

[01:10:31] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah I mean we'll talk about that

[01:10:33] [SPEAKER_01]: stuff another point in time but so how

[01:10:36] [SPEAKER_01]: did we get here this is the Anakin

[01:10:38] [SPEAKER_01]: episode but we don't know why this

[01:10:40] [SPEAKER_01]: happens no it's like the whole movies

[01:10:43] [SPEAKER_01]: are now revealed to be this ultimate

[01:10:45] [SPEAKER_01]: tragedy of one man right it's like you

[01:10:47] [SPEAKER_01]: have this person like prophesies to

[01:10:50] [SPEAKER_01]: change the force prophesies the future

[01:10:52] [SPEAKER_01]: of the Jedi's and it turns out to be

[01:10:53] [SPEAKER_01]: their worst nightmare yeah he brings

[01:10:55] [SPEAKER_01]: about their very end although it's

[01:10:58] [SPEAKER_01]: really palpatine who does most of it

[01:10:59] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah and it's also so muddled it's

[01:11:02] [SPEAKER_02]: like in a way they're sort of trying

[01:11:05] [SPEAKER_02]: to say that like you know by putting

[01:11:09] [SPEAKER_02]: the pressure on him of having to restore

[01:11:11] [SPEAKER_02]: the balance that maybe that made him

[01:11:12] [SPEAKER_02]: crack but they don't do the work to make

[01:11:14] [SPEAKER_02]: that payoff is it just hey he was just a

[01:11:18] [SPEAKER_02]: kid and evil corrupted him and evil

[01:11:21] [SPEAKER_02]: corrupt anyone all of us are corruptible

[01:11:23] [SPEAKER_02]: are they trying to say that he was

[01:11:24] [SPEAKER_02]: destined to fall are they trying to

[01:11:27] [SPEAKER_02]: say that he just had the bad luck of

[01:11:29] [SPEAKER_02]: being in Palpatine's way there's a real

[01:11:32] [SPEAKER_01]: hint of destiny to it don't you think

[01:11:34] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah I mean there's another angle I

[01:11:36] [SPEAKER_02]: want to get out in the Palpatine

[01:11:37] [SPEAKER_02]: episode talk about but there is kind of

[01:11:39] [SPEAKER_01]: a hint of like even if the Jedi had

[01:11:42] [SPEAKER_01]: played their cards right which they

[01:11:44] [SPEAKER_01]: don't yeah that all of this and like we

[01:11:47] [SPEAKER_01]: talked about in the Phantom Menace that

[01:11:48] [SPEAKER_01]: all of this was kind of coming to an

[01:11:50] [SPEAKER_01]: end they're like there's opulence it

[01:11:52] [SPEAKER_01]: you know there's rules of the game

[01:11:53] [SPEAKER_01]: yeah you know exactly the red tape

[01:11:55] [SPEAKER_01]: they're really the regular regular

[01:11:58] [SPEAKER_01]: recently we watched that film great

[01:11:59] [SPEAKER_01]: film yeah that's a great it's an

[01:12:01] [SPEAKER_01]: anti revenge of this but it's very

[01:12:04] [SPEAKER_01]: similar revenge of the Sith or some

[01:12:06] [SPEAKER_01]: parts of the Phantom Menace and

[01:12:07] [SPEAKER_01]: technical and it's about these rich

[01:12:09] [SPEAKER_01]: fools kind of ignoring like what's really

[01:12:12] [SPEAKER_02]: happening around dealing with petty

[01:12:14] [SPEAKER_02]: like domestic drama is focused on

[01:12:16] [SPEAKER_02]: well the world around them crumbles

[01:12:20] [SPEAKER_02]: you needed three movies to do that to

[01:12:22] [SPEAKER_02]: trick us into thinking we're gonna

[01:12:23] [SPEAKER_02]: watch someone save the world and watch

[01:12:25] [SPEAKER_02]: them die only that he needed three movies

[01:12:27] [SPEAKER_01]: to finally maybe get a good character

[01:12:29] [SPEAKER_01]: at Anakin Skywalker and give him to us

[01:12:31] [SPEAKER_01]: for two minutes yeah maybe there's

[01:12:35] [SPEAKER_01]: another Star Wars movie there's not

[01:12:37] [SPEAKER_01]: another Star Wars talking like an idiot

[01:12:39] [SPEAKER_02]: but it you do I mean look we do know

[01:12:41] [SPEAKER_02]: that Disney bought Lucasfilm

[01:12:42] [SPEAKER_02]: maybe it's the Darth Vader story I

[01:12:44] [SPEAKER_02]: think they primarily want to keep

[01:12:46] [SPEAKER_02]: making Indiana Jones movies because

[01:12:48] [SPEAKER_02]: that's a successful franchise this was

[01:12:50] [SPEAKER_01]: a very successful franchise yeah this

[01:12:52] [SPEAKER_02]: movie made a billion dollars the box

[01:12:53] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean maybe they'll reboot Star Wars we

[01:12:55] [SPEAKER_02]: can only hope there'll be an episode 4

[01:12:57] [SPEAKER_02]: someday but you know you do have that

[01:13:00] [SPEAKER_02]: thing we've seen a lot of movies in

[01:13:04] [SPEAKER_02]: which someone good wrestles with evil

[01:13:08] [SPEAKER_02]: before finally finding their way again

[01:13:10] [SPEAKER_01]: right sure we've seen some movies where

[01:13:12] [SPEAKER_02]: people you know have a tragic turn like

[01:13:15] [SPEAKER_02]: this one right yeah I'd say more often

[01:13:18] [SPEAKER_02]: especially in big budget mainstream

[01:13:22] [SPEAKER_02]: populist let's say kid skewing

[01:13:24] [SPEAKER_02]: entertainment like this although this

[01:13:26] [SPEAKER_02]: barely qualifies as a kid I think he

[01:13:28] [SPEAKER_02]: thinks he's making a kids film but

[01:13:29] [SPEAKER_02]: barely right

[01:13:33] [SPEAKER_02]: more often we have someone who is

[01:13:36] [SPEAKER_02]: evil and and we learn then of the

[01:13:39] [SPEAKER_02]: tragedy of how they got that way that

[01:13:42] [SPEAKER_02]: they were once good do you know what I'm

[01:13:44] [SPEAKER_02]: saying yeah we rarely have to watch

[01:13:46] [SPEAKER_02]: someone become evil and if we do it's

[01:13:47] [SPEAKER_02]: on the sidelines of a film it's that

[01:13:50] [SPEAKER_02]: character now becomes the villain in

[01:13:52] [SPEAKER_02]: relation to our hero sure this movie

[01:13:54] [SPEAKER_02]: is just like just fucking watch

[01:13:56] [SPEAKER_02]: everything watch everything just fall

[01:13:58] [SPEAKER_02]: apart just watch your heart break and

[01:13:59] [SPEAKER_01]: it might work if it if it progressed

[01:14:02] [SPEAKER_02]: if you had any emotional investment in

[01:14:04] [SPEAKER_02]: it then maybe it would be so tragic

[01:14:05] [SPEAKER_02]: that would be like room that it would

[01:14:06] [SPEAKER_02]: be a tough experience but one worth

[01:14:09] [SPEAKER_02]: watching instead I just room has a

[01:14:11] [SPEAKER_02]: happy ending yeah I just feel gross

[01:14:13] [SPEAKER_02]: watching this movie and not just

[01:14:15] [SPEAKER_02]: because it's bad but I just feel it

[01:14:17] [SPEAKER_02]: feels very cynical to me and it's

[01:14:22] [SPEAKER_01]: it's I know I know I know it does

[01:14:25] [SPEAKER_01]: feel cynical it feels unearned

[01:14:29] [SPEAKER_01]: it's very misanthropic it's very

[01:14:33] [SPEAKER_01]: it's just very anti Jedi maybe he

[01:14:35] [SPEAKER_01]: just hates the Jedi this is what this

[01:14:37] [SPEAKER_02]: was his dream project he got to make

[01:14:39] [SPEAKER_02]: three movies exactly what he wanted to

[01:14:41] [SPEAKER_02]: and this is what he wanted to say look

[01:14:42] [SPEAKER_01]: he made this epic tragedy that's what it

[01:14:44] [SPEAKER_02]: is but the first two parts aren't a

[01:14:46] [SPEAKER_02]: tragic that's the first part is Jar Jar

[01:14:48] [SPEAKER_02]: banks in it that's my problem with

[01:14:49] [SPEAKER_02]: the idea of this being an epic

[01:14:50] [SPEAKER_02]: tragedy you know they charge a tragic

[01:14:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I mean he's tragic in different way

[01:14:54] [SPEAKER_01]: I agree with you there's so much more

[01:14:56] [SPEAKER_01]: to discuss because we got to talk about

[01:14:58] [SPEAKER_01]: the Palpatine side of this we got

[01:14:59] [SPEAKER_01]: to talk about the Jedi side of this

[01:15:00] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah and we have to talk about yeah

[01:15:04] [SPEAKER_02]: there's stuff to talk about look I know

[01:15:06] [SPEAKER_02]: this this this was a bummer episode

[01:15:08] [SPEAKER_02]: they're all bummers it's a bummer movie

[01:15:10] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah no but this was not our funniest

[01:15:12] [SPEAKER_02]: episode but this is not the funniest

[01:15:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Phantom Menace movie devoid of comedy and

[01:15:17] [SPEAKER_02]: we look we had to go through the

[01:15:18] [SPEAKER_02]: trenches today we had to dig through the

[01:15:20] [SPEAKER_02]: dirt and just talk about this with

[01:15:23] [SPEAKER_02]: the weird fucking turn yep the main

[01:15:25] [SPEAKER_01]: arc of this film which is tragedy

[01:15:27] [SPEAKER_02]: it's just everything sucks everyone's

[01:15:29] [SPEAKER_02]: everything's terrible everyone's the

[01:15:30] [SPEAKER_01]: worst have you seen any good movies

[01:15:31] [SPEAKER_01]: recently this one and on up yeah

[01:15:34] [SPEAKER_02]: as car is pretty good I need to see

[01:15:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Sakarya I didn't love it but I thought

[01:15:38] [SPEAKER_02]: it's pretty good I like Dennis

[01:15:40] [SPEAKER_02]: villain of a lot okay it's maybe my

[01:15:42] [SPEAKER_02]: least favorite of his films but I

[01:15:43] [SPEAKER_02]: think he's a really strong film

[01:15:44] [SPEAKER_02]: maker all right well that's not what

[01:15:46] [SPEAKER_01]: I was looking for come on I'm hope

[01:15:48] [SPEAKER_01]: you see Hotel Transylvania to get

[01:15:49] [SPEAKER_02]: to see it tonight I'm very excited

[01:15:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I've heard the diminishing returns

[01:15:52] [SPEAKER_02]: but also from a lot of people who

[01:15:54] [SPEAKER_02]: didn't like the first one as much

[01:15:55] [SPEAKER_02]: as I did and those people are wrong

[01:15:56] [SPEAKER_02]: okay I was gotten by to a screen last

[01:15:59] [SPEAKER_02]: weekend but I slept there yeah it

[01:16:01] [SPEAKER_02]: was early in the morning and I don't

[01:16:03] [SPEAKER_02]: like morning

[01:16:03] [SPEAKER_02]: guess you can't hold up Transylvania to

[01:16:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and those movies are about people who

[01:16:07] [SPEAKER_02]: seem to be good bad but are actually

[01:16:09] [SPEAKER_02]: good that's the world I want to live

[01:16:11] [SPEAKER_02]: in people think they're spooky monsters

[01:16:13] [SPEAKER_02]: and they turn out to be nice people

[01:16:14] [SPEAKER_02]: like love in there like Ben is a

[01:16:17] [SPEAKER_02]: spooky monster when I saw him when I

[01:16:19] [SPEAKER_02]: saw Ben for the first time I went

[01:16:20] [SPEAKER_02]: oh spooky oh spooky you say you sang

[01:16:24] [SPEAKER_02]: the monster man was singing okay

[01:16:26] [SPEAKER_02]: let's just admit the first time I

[01:16:27] [SPEAKER_02]: met Ben he was singing the monster

[01:16:29] [SPEAKER_02]: match in a haunted house yeah it's

[01:16:30] [SPEAKER_02]: true and he was covered in blood is

[01:16:32] [SPEAKER_02]: true and I thought you were spooky

[01:16:34] [SPEAKER_02]: and then I came to realize you had the

[01:16:36] [SPEAKER_02]: biggest heart of the mall that's true

[01:16:38] [SPEAKER_01]: that's not true all right good old Ben

[01:16:43] [SPEAKER_01]: he hated this movie about this movie

[01:16:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Ben is terrible it's the worst right

[01:16:48] [SPEAKER_00]: it was such a terrible experience called

[01:16:53] [SPEAKER_02]: it I really want to defend it yeah

[01:16:56] [SPEAKER_00]: no there's no way to ending this

[01:16:57] [SPEAKER_02]: one the dactyl seem we'll talk about

[01:16:59] [SPEAKER_01]: the dactyls okay yeah we got talk about

[01:17:01] [SPEAKER_01]: general grievous with his blood sabers

[01:17:03] [SPEAKER_02]: talk about all this oh okay Ben final

[01:17:06] [SPEAKER_02]: thoughts you hate this movie yeah I hate

[01:17:09] [SPEAKER_00]: this movie and you're hungover hung over

[01:17:12] [SPEAKER_00]: and fuck George Lucas man yeah fuck

[01:17:14] [SPEAKER_01]: George Lucas final thoughts fuck

[01:17:16] [SPEAKER_01]: George Lucas fuck George look we'll see

[01:17:18] [SPEAKER_01]: you guys next week will be more we'll

[01:17:19] [SPEAKER_02]: be more fun next week will be fun

[01:17:21] [SPEAKER_02]: we'll have a great gas we got this

[01:17:22] [SPEAKER_02]: out of the way we ripped off the band

[01:17:24] [SPEAKER_02]: as we said we were going to fuck

[01:17:26] [SPEAKER_02]: George Lucas and as always fuck George